The Anxiety of Kalix the Werewolf (28 page)

“Just get out of the flat!” said Verasa urgently.

Decembrius rang off. “Your mother is worried about us. She wants us to leave. Probably that's the best idea. I'll see if I can fix the door before we go.”

Kalix nodded. She took a final look around the hallway. She'd seen a lot of dead werewolves in her short life, and now there were three more.

“I'm going to destroy the Guild,” she said.

Decembrius bent down and felt in Duncan's pockets. He took out a set of keys. They left, closing the flat door behind them. Downstairs at the street door, Decembrius did his best to reposition the lock he'd dislodged while breaking in.

“It'll hold for a little while anyway,” he said, jamming it back into place. “I hope no one's filming us leaving the scene. There are cameras everywhere these days.”

Kalix had a brief, alarming image of seeing herself on a crime program on TV, caught on film as a suspect in a triple murder. They kept their heads down as they headed for the car.

“Thrix and Dominil said they'd find the Guild,” said Kalix. “What's taking them so long?”

“Maybe they've already found them. Maybe they're not telling us.”

Kalix wondered if that could be true. Might Thrix and Dominil regard her as so untrustworthy that they wouldn't even tell her when they'd found the Avenaris Guild's headquarters? Could the MacRinnalch Clan execute an attack without her? It was a distressing thought, but the more Kalix pondered it, the more likely it seemed. Everyone regarded her as unreliable. Not only that, she was still in exile. It might be against clan rules to let her join in the attack.

“They're not leaving me out,” said Kalix. “When they attack the Guild I'm going too.” She looked at Decembrius. “You're on the Great Council. Why don't you find out about it?”

“I don't like to get involved with the council.”

“Stop being so useless,” said Kalix. “Find out what's happening. Take responsibility.”

Decembrius laughed. “That's funny coming from you.”

Kalix scowled at him, but didn't answer. Nor did she respond to Decembrius's broad hint that she might like to visit North London with him, rather than going back to her own flat. Finding his hint ignored, Decembrius made the direct suggestion that they go to a bar somewhere, have a few drinks and then go home together.

“We just found three dead werewolves and now you want to sleep with me?”

“Good a way as any of getting over a bad experience,” said Decembrius.

“You really disgust me sometimes,” said Kalix.

Decembrius was offended by her blank refusal and by the time he dropped her off in Kennington they were, as usual, no longer speaking to each other.

CHAPTER 51

It was a surprise to everyone when Pete called Vex and asked if he could take her out on a date.

“He actually called?” Daniel was amazed. “I thought it was just a one-night thing.”

“Me too,” admitted Moonglow. “I never thought she'd hear from him again.”

Since Pete had called, two days ago, Vex had spent her time tripping around the flat, humming cheerfully to herself and carrying the current edition of Absolute Boyfriend, a manga which she regarded as an authoritative text on the subject.

“We're going on a date,” she said many times. “I'm so happy to have a boyfriend! Isn't it great?”

This had been endearing for a short while, but for Vex's loveless flatmates it had now started to grate. Daniel, still stricken over Moonglow,
could muster no enthusiasm for anyone else's happy love life. Nor could Kalix. Moonglow was pleased to see Vex happy but was starting to have doubts about her new fixation.

“I'm not sure that manga is good for her,” she confided to Daniel. “Suddenly it's like having a boyfriend is the only thing that matters. Maybe I should have a word with her.”

“Yes, do that,” said Daniel. “Vex would enjoy a long lecture about girls not defining themselves in terms of their boyfriends. Maybe you could throw in a brief history of feminism too? Serve her right for being happy.”

“Very funny,” said Moonglow. She resolved to say no more on the subject. Her resolve lasted for only a few minutes. “I just don't like the way she's tripping around the place. Can't she walk normally?”

It was true that Vex's gait did seem to have changed. She'd adopted a slightly skipping motion, like a young child.

“So she's skipping around a little,” said Daniel. “She's happy.”

“She doesn't need to be so girly all the time.”

“Vex is always girly,” Daniel said. “You know, with the Hello Kitty T-shirts and multi-colored nail varnish.”

“Well, now she's being extra girly,” said Moonglow.

“And you find this annoying?”

“No, I don't,” said Moonglow. “I'm just pointing it out.”

Something about Vex's behavior seemed to have touched a nerve, irritating Moonglow. Daniel, whose hopeless, defeated love for Moonglow had naturally made him rather annoyed at her, might have pressed the point further, just to be annoying in turn, had they not been interrupted by the sudden arrival of the Fire Queen. Malveria materialized in their front room with an orange flash which was bright enough to inform them that she was not in the best of moods, but not bright enough to mean that she was furious.

“Daniel, Moonglow,” said the Fire Queen, politely. “I apologize for my unexpected arrival, but circumstances force me to flee the palace.”

“Oh dear,” said Moonglow, and looked concerned. “Not more fighting?”

“Not yet,” said Malveria. “Though if Duke Garfire persists with his unwanted advances, there may be violence. I am troubled by amorous advances from my nobles that are quite unwelcome.”

The Fire Queen took a seat on the couch. Daniel, fearing that he might have to listen to more about amorous advances than he cared to, hurried to the kitchen to put the kettle on. The Fire Queen valued good manners, and always appreciated the way that Daniel and Moonglow would make tea for her.

“Also,” continued the Queen to Moonglow, “I need to talk to my dismal niece. Has she committed any outrages recently?”

Moonglow shook her head. “No outrages at all. Everything is going well.”

“Has she made use of the computer that I purchased for her?”

Moonglow hesitated. Vex had learned how to look at fashion websites and read manga online, but whether or not she'd done anything educational, as the Fire Queen had specified, she wasn't sure.

“I think she's been using it quite a lot.”

“No doubt for unsuitable purposes,” said the Fire Queen. “Rather than learning anything.”

“I'm sure she'll be ready for next term at college,” said Moonglow encouragingly.

“I hope so,” said the Queen. “Though at the moment, other matters occupy my mind. But they are personal, and I can't tell you about them.”

“OK,” said Moonglow.

“It would involve criticizing my good friend Thrix, which I would not like to do.”

“All right.”

“But she has deserted me in a most scandalous manner! Really, Moonglow, it is a terrible affair! Two nights ago I should have been at a fashion show in London and I could not go because Thrix had not made me the dress she promised! She has attempted to fob me off with her designers who are not up to the task. Can you imagine the humiliation? I, Malveria, shamefully reduced to the level of an inferior client?” The Fire Queen shook her head. “I never thought she would abandon me this way.”

Moonglow was aware of the strong relationship between Thrix and Malveria, and wondered what could have happened. “Did you have some sort of argument?”

“Argument? Why do you say that?”

“Well,” said Moonglow, “you have had arguments before.”

“True. Tempers have flared at times. It is inevitable in the heady and competitive world of fashion. But there has been no argument. Thrix has simply abandoned me.”

The Fire Queen took out a tiny lace handkerchief and dabbed her eyes. Daniel arrived back with a large tray on which were three of Moonglow's best china cups and a teapot.

“Thank you, Daniel. I so appreciate your good manners. It is such a
strong contrast with the despicable behavior of Thrix MacRinnalch.”

Malveria turned to Moonglow. “As life has been so trying recently, I hoped that we might make another attempt at the six-stage lip process?”

Before Moonglow could reply, there was a noisy clattering on the stairs as Vex appeared wearing the largest pair of boots yet seen on her, along with the shortest skirt.

“Aunt Malvie!” she cried. “I'm getting ready for a date. With my boyfriend!”

Daniel and Moonglow tensed slightly, sensing that Queen Malveria was not in the right mood to listen to Vex enthusing about her boyfriend.

“Boyfriend?” said Malveria. “You mean this guitarist?”

“Yes.”

“He actually called you?”

“Of course!” Vex grinned. It struck Moonglow that she'd never seen anyone so completely happy as Vex at that moment. Malveria did not seem so impressed.

“Agrivex, is this a suitable relationship? I did not send you to Earth to gallivant with guitarists.” The Queen paused. “What are you wearing on your feet?”

“Sorel boots! They're made for walking over glaciers. Whatever a glacier is. Some sort of big animal, I think.”

Vex beamed. Her boots really were large, even by her standards. The Queen barely suppressed a shudder.

“Did the excitement of your boots cause you to forget your other garments?” said the Fire Queen, eyeing the small strip of material that barely qualified as a skirt.

“New from Camden,” said Vex happily, and looked at her legs, which were slender and pretty, as she knew.

“Lengthen it immediately,” said the Queen. “Exhibiting one's underwear is not done in the best circles.”

Vex laughed and then managed to say exactly the wrong thing. “You must be close to getting a boyfriend too, Aunty. With all these dukes and lords wooing you?”

Vex turned to Moonglow and Daniel. “Aunt Malvie's really popular these days! Every day there's some duke or lord asking her to a ball.”

“Agrivex,” said Malveria, “this is not a suitable subject. Drop it immediately!”

“Must make you feel good to have so many men chasing you, Aunty. Who do you like best? Lord Stratov's a bit old, I suppose, but I hear he's
really keen on you. I hear a lot of good things about Duke Garfire too, he's a bit of a favorite at the palace, what with his daughter Honorable Gloria that everyone likes.”

“No one likes the Honorable Gloria.”

Vex looked at her aunt, and for the first time noticed that something might be amiss. There was a hint of flame around the Queen's left eye.

“I came here to escape from this foolishness, not to hear you prattle about it. It seems to me, Agrivex, that you are not spending your time wisely. I have given you various tasks to complete while in this dimension. How are they progressing?”

Vex looked confused as she struggled to remember what tasks her aunt might have given her. “Was it something to do with shopping?”

“It was not to do with shopping, dismal niece.”

“I'm good at shopping.”

“Stop saying ‘shopping.' It did not enter into your tasks. I instructed you to learn how to use the computer I was informed you required for college. I also instructed you to work on your elemental powers.”

The Fire Queen shifted in her seat to speak to Moonglow.

“Agrivex's total lack of control of her elemental powers is a source of continual embarrassment. The four-year-old daughter of my idiot kitchen maid has better control of her flames than Agrivex.”

“That's not fair!” protested Vex.

“Really? Can you do this?”

The Fire Queen pointed her finger. A long tongue of yellow flame shot out, which she held in the air quite steadily, not letting it touch anything in the room.

“Well? Can you?”

“Maybe,” said Vex.

“Then let us see.”

Agrivex held out her hand and screwed up her face. Nothing happened.

“Pah,” cried the Queen. “A complete failure.”

“I think her finger's going a little bit pink,” said Daniel encouragingly.

“Only where she has poorly applied her nail varnish,” said the Queen. “Agrivex, this is most unsatisfactory. You must make an effort. You are my officially adopted niece and you cannot disgrace the royal family like this.”

Agrivex strained some more, with no result. The Fire Queen was clearly annoyed at her niece, and Daniel and Moonglow began to feel uncomfortable.

“So, abominable girl. You have ignored my instructions again,
preferring to spend your time obtaining preposterous boots and ridiculous skirts in an effort to ensnare some unfortunate guitarist. It is not good enough.” She glared at her niece. “And what about your computer? Have you learned how to use that?”