The Complete Works of William Shakespeare In Plain and Simple English (Translated) (734 page)

Do their best office, if they can but stay you

Where you'll be loath to be: besides you know

Prosperity's the very bond of love,

Whose fresh complexion and whose heart together

Affliction alters.

A plan more promising

than wildly throwing yourselves

into unmapped waters, unknown shores, certain

to bring you hardships; with no hope for you

as one follows after another;

the most certain thing would be your anchor, which

at best can only keep you

where you don't want to be: anyway you know

prosperity is the sealant of love,

whose charming looks and whose heart

can be changed by hardship.

PERDITA

One of these is true:

I think affliction may subdue the cheek,

But not take in the mind.

One of those things is true:

I think hardship might change the looks,

but it won't change the mind.

CAMILLO

Yea, say you so?

There shall not at your father's house these

seven years

Be born another such.

Is that what you say?

There won't be another like you

born at your father's house

for an age.

FLORIZEL

My good Camillo,

She is as forward of her breeding as

She is i' the rear our birth.

My good Camillo,

she is as high in nobility as

she is low in birth.

CAMILLO

I cannot say 'tis pity

She lacks instructions, for she seems a mistress

To most that teach.

I can't say that it's a shame

that she hasn't been educated,  for she seems superior

to most teachers.

PERDITA

Your pardon, sir; for this

I'll blush you thanks.

You'll excuse me, sir; for this

I'll show my thanks with a blush.

FLORIZEL

My prettiest Perdita!

But O, the thorns we stand upon! Camillo,

Preserver of my father, now of me,

The medicine of our house, how shall we do?

We are not furnish'd like Bohemia's son,

Nor shall appear in Sicilia.

My prettiest Perdita!

But oh, I feel like I'm on hot bricks! Camillo,

saviour of my father, now of me,

the doctor of our house, what shall we do?

I'm not dressed like Bohemia's son,

and I won't seem so in Sicily.

CAMILLO

My lord,

Fear none of this: I think you know my fortunes

Do all lie there: it shall be so my care

To have you royally appointed as if

The scene you play were mine. For instance, sir,

That you may know you shall not want, one word.

They talk aside

Re-enter AUTOLYCUS

My lord,

don't worry about that: I think you know my fortune

is still all there: I will make it my business

to have you so royally dressed as if

I was directing your scene for you. For instance, sir,

so you know you won't lack for anything, let's have a word.

AUTOLYCUS

Ha, ha! what a fool Honesty is! and Trust, his

sworn brother, a very simple gentleman! I have sold

all my trumpery; not a counterfeit stone, not a

ribbon, glass, pomander, brooch, table-book, ballad,

knife, tape, glove, shoe-tie, bracelet, horn-ring,

to keep my pack from fasting: they throng who

should buy first, as if my trinkets had been

hallowed and brought a benediction to the buyer:

by which means I saw whose purse was best in

picture; and what I saw, to my good use I

remembered. My clown, who wants but something to

be a reasonable man, grew so in love with the

wenches' song, that he would not stir his pettitoes

till he had both tune and words; which so drew the

rest of the herd to me that all their other senses

stuck in ears: you might have pinched a placket, it

was senseless; 'twas nothing to geld a codpiece of a

purse; I could have filed keys off that hung in

chains: no hearing, no feeling, but my sir's song,

and admiring the nothing of it. So that in this

time of lethargy I picked and cut most of their

festival purses; and had not the old man come in

with a whoo-bub against his daughter and the king's

son and scared my choughs from the chaff, I had not

left a purse alive in the whole army.

CAMILLO, FLORIZEL, and PERDITA come forward

Ha ha! How stupid Honesty is! And Trust, his

sworn brother, is a very simple gentleman! I have

sold all my rubbish: not a fake stone, not a

ribbon, glass, pomander, brooch, notebook,

ballad, knife, tape, gloves, shoelace, bracelet,

magic ring is left in my empty pack: they mobbed

me for the privilege of buying first, as if my trinkets were

sacred and gave a blessing to the buyer:

because of that I saw whose purse was best for

pinching, and what I saw I remembered for my benefit.

My clown (who's not really all there)

became so in love with the girls singing,

that he would not move his trotters until he had both

the tune and the words; that pulled the rest of the herd

so close to me, that only their ears were working: you

might have pinched a bodice, they were so oblivious;

it was nothing to cut a purse away from a trouser pocket; I could

have filed off the keys that hung from chains: they heard nothing,

felt nothing, but my lad's song, admiring its worthlessness.

So in this quiet interval I picked and cut

most of their dress purses; and if

the old man hadn't come in making a hullabaloo about his

daughter and the king's son, and scared the birds

away from the bait, not one of those purses would have survived.

CAMILLO

Nay, but my letters, by this means being there

So soon as you arrive, shall clear that doubt.

It's all right, my letters, through being there

as soon as you arrive, will stop that doubt.

FLORIZEL

And those that you'll procure from King Leontes--

And those that you'll get from King Leontes–

CAMILLO

Shall satisfy your father.

Will please your father.

PERDITA

Happy be you!

All that you speak shows fair.

Blessings upon you!

Everything you say is good.

CAMILLO

Who have we here?

Seeing AUTOLYCUS

We'll make an instrument of this, omit

Nothing may give us aid.

Who have we here?

We'll use this as a tool, we shan't

neglect anything that could help us.

AUTOLYCUS

If they have overheard me now, why, hanging.

If they overheard what I said just now, I'll be hung.

CAMILLO

How now, good fellow! why shakest thou so? Fear

not, man; here's no harm intended to thee.

Hello there, good fellow! Why are you shaking? Don't

be afraid, man; we don't mean you any harm.

AUTOLYCUS

I am a poor fellow, sir.

I am a poor man, sir.

CAMILLO

Why, be so still; here's nobody will steal that from

thee: yet for the outside of thy poverty we must

make an exchange; therefore discase thee instantly,

--thou must think there's a necessity in't,--and

change garments with this gentleman: though the

pennyworth on his side be the worst, yet hold thee,

there's some boot.

Well, you can carry on being one; there's nobody here who will

steal that away from you: but we want to make a swap

for your poor appearance; undress yourself at once–

you must believe this is essential–and

swap clothes with this gentleman: although he's getting

the rough end of the bargain, if you wait

there will be some reward.

AUTOLYCUS

I am a poor fellow, sir.

Aside

I know ye well enough.

I am a poor fellow, sir.

I know who you are well enough.

CAMILLO

Nay, prithee, dispatch: the gentleman is half

flayed already.

Now, please hurry: this gentleman is half

undressed already.

AUTOLYCUS

Are you in earnest, sir?

Aside

I smell the trick on't.

Are you serious, sir?

I can see a trap here.

FLORIZEL

Dispatch, I prithee.

Hurry, please.

AUTOLYCUS

Indeed, I have had earnest: but I cannot with

conscience take it.

Well, you've paid a deposit: but I can't

in all conscience take it.

CAMILLO

Unbuckle, unbuckle.

Undress, undress.

FLORIZEL and AUTOLYCUS exchange garments

Fortunate mistress,--let my prophecy

Come home to ye!--you must retire yourself

Into some covert: take your sweetheart's hat

And pluck it o'er your brows, muffle your face,

Dismantle you, and, as you can, disliken

The truth of your own seeming; that you may--

For I do fear eyes over--to shipboard

Get undescried.

Lucky mistress–may those words

be proved true!–You must go off

into the woods: take your sweetheart's hat

and pull it down over your forehead, wrap up your face,

undress, and as much as you can  disguise

your appearance; so you can–

because I'm worried about spies–get on board the ship

without being spotted.

PERDITA

I see the play so lies

That I must bear a part.

I see the way the play is going,

so that I must take a part.

CAMILLO

No remedy.

Have you done there?

It can't be helped.

Are you finished?

FLORIZEL

Should I now meet my father,

He would not call me son.

If I met my father now,

he wouldn't recognise me.

CAMILLO

Nay, you shall have no hat.

Giving it to PERDITA