The Dance of Reality: A Psychomagical Autobiography (54 page)

Racz, André (painter), 111–12
Rebbe, 11–12, 20–21, 37, 50, 60–62,
        plate 11
Rialland, Chantal (writer), 335–36
Rogelio, Don (Rabid Healer), 299–300
Roncal, Virginia (dancer), 138–39
Sabina, María, 235, 266
Said, Don Carlos (healer), 300–302
Santiago de Chile
(pantomime),
245
shamanism
    Castaneda’s, 262–65
    charlatans, 293–302
    Ichazo’s, 252–62
    machis, 282,
355
, 356–58
    move to psychoshamanism from,
        358–59
    Pachita’s folk magic healing, 269–93
    superstition needed for, 289
    See also
magic; psychoshamanism
Soledad (healer), 297–99

Takata, Ejo, 196–98, 215, 247–51,
249
Tarot
    decision to charge for readings, 303–5
    Lefevre’s deck, 240
    meaning of Tocopilla and, 1–2
    Strength image stolen from library, 3
theater
    with Alejandro Flores, 153–60
    art of theatrical advice, 194–95
    awareness due to, 136–37
    circus clown stint, 146–53
    civil holiness, 143–45
    dance performances seen, 137–39
    dispensing with actors, audience, and
        building, 180, 182
    dissatisfaction with realism, 160–61
    effectiveness vs. perfection, 154, 156, 157
    ephemeral panics, 182–94
    firefighter’s burial and, 130–33,
132
    with Marceau, 175–76, 178, 180
    mime, 162, 165, 175–80, 244
    performers in Tocopilla, 128–30
    seizure witnessed and, 133–34
    singing Chinese Prince and, 134–36
    studying emotions, 161
    study with Decroux, 173–75
    teaching, 161–62
    TEUCH puppet theater, 140–42
    TEUC puppet theater, 153
Tocopilla, plate 3
    childhood house, 5
    cultural richness in, 30
    meaning of, 1–2, 219–20
    performers visiting, 128–30
Toño, Don (healer), 297
Topor,
164
, 189, 208
trickery, sacred, 239, 280
Troika, 262–63, 265
Trumbley, Valérie (wife),
179
, 303

Uthoff, Ernst (dancer), 138

Varin, Stella Díaz (poet), 96–109
“Viper, The” (poem), 95, 100–101

youth in Santiago
    address book tossed, 125, 171–72, 208
    ambivalence about leaving, 165
    body felt as an alien, 63–64
    body seen as an enemy, 76–77
    bullied at school, 46, 48–49
    burning of family house, 165–68
    at Cereceda sisters’ home, 89–93
    chased by thieves/cops, 78–79
    cleaning banknotes, 42–43
    concepts redefined, 116–17
    conquering space and time, 66–69
    dance instructor murdered, 139–40
    dead beggar and vomiting, 35
    de-virginizing Consuelo, 144–45
    the dog brings a stone, 169–70
    earthquake, 43–44
    entry into world of poetry, 89–91
    family seen as a trap, 37, 60
    family strictures thrown off, 81, 83–85
    father’s small penis seen, 44–46
    field trip from school, 35–37
    first meeting with Lihn, 114, 116
    forgiveness with his family, 93–94
    high jump competition, 47–48
    humiliated as a Jew, 46–47
    imagination chosen as a path, 69–70
    imaginative techniques conceived,
        70–75
    indicating shoplifters to Jaime, 39–40
    leaving for Paris, 125–27, 171–72
    Lefevre’s Tarot readings, 239–40
    lime tree hacked with ax, 88–89
    Luz as his angel, 110–12
    magic mirror episode, 237–39
    meditative concentration deepened, 77
    meetings with Parra, 100–101,
        240–42
    one-tooth landlady, 34–35
    Parra puppet made, 96
    path found in blown book page, 66
    photographs burned, 49, 50
    poems written, 42, 46–47, 91, 107, 384
    poetry discovered, 41–42
    pride of the drunkards, 38–39
    puppet making, 92–93, 96, 110
    reasons for birth considered, 86
    Rebbe on basic rights, 60–62
    return to parents after Stella, 109–10
    self reimagined, 64–66, 77–78,
        79–80, 82–85
    shame about penis, 36, 46
    sister’s crotch visited at night, 80
    spider contemplated, 75–76
    with Stella Díaz Varin, 96–109
    surrealism discovered, 85
    taken out of school, 38
    Teatro Mímico formed, 162, 165
    violin coffin, 40–41
    weight gain, 40
    worms emptied on parents’ bed,
        81–82
  
 See also
poetic acts; theater

Zaratustra
performance,
179, 181

“Shut up, you coward, they’ll say my son is a queer.”

“Tocopilla, this tremor, this scent of stones, this lament of a small town torn to shreds by the sun, these patient streets longing for a drop of water.”

“Should I suffer the anguish of the sardines or should I delight in the joy of the gulls?”

“Willpower overcomes pain.”

Something is dreaming us

“The darkness is swallowing everything.”

“Who is Don Jose?” “Don Jose is you!”

“God does not exist.”

“All you are going to be, you are already.
What you are looking for is already within you.”