The Fallen Ones (The Fallen Angels Series Book 1) (7 page)

Ilyana:

As I
reach the cave I am surprised to find that trapped in the small, dark space I
feel more free than I have in weeks. I am completely alone with nowhere else to
be and nothing important to do. For a moment I allow my mind the chance to
wander and I imagine staying, then I think of Sasha and snap back to reality.
It would be irresponsible of me to choose homelessness for myself and a dog too
- especially when we have the option of staying with someone as kind as Levi.
But now that I hurt Ephraim, even that is up in the air. I can’t imagine how I
would live with myself if I hurt Levi too. But there is a possibility that this
is just what I am now I find myself walking in circles in the cave, the rain
has started to really let down so I begin clearing a spot on the earth to sit
down and rest. I begin to carefully kneel down into a sitting position but with
the extra soreness in my legs from my workout I quickly begin to fall forward
and that’s when it happens.

I make
contact with the wall of the cave and I feel a warmth rushing through me
rapidly. It takes over me and everything around me is illuminated. They cave is
no longer grey, I see a hint of green from patches of grass and the rain
pouring in outside, I look down at my body and see patches of red that focus in
close to my skin – I never imagined my aura could be red. I always pictured it
would be black or brown or even grey, but somehow the red suits me. I turn around
to face the back of the cave and I what I see renders me speechless, I start to
scream, but no sound comes out. I begin to gather my senses and realize I must
be seeing things. People talk about having visions of angels all the time, so
that must be what I am experiencing now.

Ahead
of me, where there used to be a solid rock foundation, there is now a group of
Nephilim. Some of them are blankly facing me, some are staring ahead and some
are murmuring to themselves. One is hunched over brushing the hair of a woman
that is speaking to herself. The words are unintelligible and I realize she
must be speaking some old language. I begin to step forward to see if I can
decipher anything she is saying, when I step forward I anticipate for the cave
to go dark, logic tells me that walls don’t move and there was just a cave in
front of me. But it doesn’t grow dimmer and no one in front of me disappears.
When I get about 10 feet away from where the hunched over man is standing I hit
an invisible barrier that makes my hands feel as though they are straining to
reach through a net. When I look back up where the man stood, brushing the
womans hair, I am startled to find he is slowly walking towards me. I don’t
know what to say so I begin to draw my hand back and apologize “I – I’m sorry.
I didn’t mean to disturb anyone, it’s just that it was raining and I needed a
place to say. I didn’t see you back here until just now…” He looks at me and
for a moment I wonder if he can even understand a word I am saying, his eyebrow
furrows and he looks away for a moment “It’s not possible, this can’t be real.
It’s finally happening, I’m finally losing my mind.” His furrowed eyebrow
remains but he begins laughing hysterically. I want to turn and run away but I
can’t leave without knowing what’s happening “What do you mean you are losing
your mind? Can I, uhmm, help?”

I
reach again but the barrier stops me from touching his shoulder. He stops
laughing and turns to give me a confused look “Can you help? This has to be a
joke! Why would I accept help from someone who is obviously allied with the
filthy traitors that abandoned us here!” my head begins to spin at his insult.
I start to wonder if this is what it feels like to go insane I turn my head and
contemplate running but I am too mad at his accusations to even allow myself to
walk away – I have always had to have the last word, and this time is no
exception. “Excuse me?! But who said anything about filthy traitors? I just
offered to help you, but I don’t even know who you are so how could I have
abandoned you here? Maybe whoever it is that left you had the right idea!” then
I allow myself to fall to the ground and I find myself muttering under my
breath “What if this really is it? What if my abilities are broken? That would
explain it all, the hum, hurting Ephraim, not being able to reach my powers…” I
begin to cry and punch myself as my thoughts trail off.

When I
look back up, the man is staring at me with concern. I really look at him this
time, I notice his dirty skin and hair that is folded neatly into a long, dark
braid. His eyes are the darkest shade of brown I have ever seen and his thick
black eyelashes frame them perfectly. In spite of his too-long nails and hair
and his dirty skin and clothing – which looks like something out of a history
book, he is beautiful. There is something regal and strong about his
appearance. Whether he is real, or a figment of my imagination I am unsure. But
I do know that he is important – or at least he was important at some point. He
reaches towards the invisible barrier as if to comfort me. “I am sorry, girl. I
should have been more kind. It’s just, I haven’t seen a Nephilim that did not
wish me harm in at least several thousand years. I did not mean to make you
cry.”

I take
in all that he just said and recognize the irony of this dirty, sad apparition
comforting me, but then I think back on the woman whose hair he was just a
moment ago lovingly stroking. I look over to her and see the same blank
expression as before, she has quit murmuring for the time being though. Still,
it doesn’t take much to see that something is very wrong with her. Her face
doesn’t look old, but her skin is covered in dust. I look across the vast space
into the faces of all the other Nephilim and realize that all of them are covered
in dust. All of them except for the man standing before me. I look to him and
allow myself to continue the conversation “Who are you and why are you all
here?” he straightens his shoulders and bows his head slightly “I am Kailand, I
am the son of Antony, everyone else here is either extended family of mine or
extended family of other original Counsel members. We were left here by the
rebels when we would not hand over the fortress and Nephilim for them to train
as weapons and sacrifice at their every whim.”

I try
to process what he is saying “The rebels? Do you mean the demon creatures?” he
looks annoyed now and begins to talk to himself “thousands of years waiting and
holding out hope and this is what I get! A petulant fool that doesn’t know who
I am or who the rebels…” I cut him off and am shocked to find myself yelling at
him “This petulant fools name is Ilyana, and while I hate to disappoint you, I
haven’t even met with the counsel yet, or trained, or done anything! I don’t
even know how to access my own powers. Now all this pressure is on me to learn
how to keep from making everyone around me sick with my buzzing abilities and I
am stuck living in the woods until I figure it out. So, I haven’t exactly
gotten around to Nephilim 101 yet!” he looks confused for a moment and then
leans for and speaks barely above a whisper “You’re a new Nephilim?” His voice
is hesitant and the anger that was on his face before is replaced with
curiosity – and his voice holds a reverent tone.

“Yes,
I am a new Nephilim, or something like that. But you wouldn’t guess that I was
Nephilim at all if you could see how completely hopeless I am.” He lets out a
frustrated sigh and turns away from me for a moment and bows his head as if to
gather his thoughts. “I don’t know how you will help me, but you are my first
shot at freedom in thousands of years and I would be a fool not to try.”
I want to say something smart, but instead I shut up and listen. He describes
to me in detail who the rebels are, he describes old Nephilim at the enclave
and talks about their hierarchy and missions. He says they were protectors of
the human race and balance in the world. He tells me his family lead the
counsel and they were overthrown when they denied the remaining counsel at the
time the ability to take and train the most skilled Nephilim for unjust wars
over money and power.

I find
it all hard to digest, but try to listen anyways. I turn to look at the outside
of the cave and notice the rain is gone and it is beginning to get dark.
“Kailand, I don’t know what to say. I want to believe you but I just don’t know
about anything that you are saying. But I will try to see what I can find out.
I need to get back home for tonight though.” I reflect on all he has shared
with me and try to think of a way to help him, but I can’t bring him food or
drinks because they won’t even move through the invisible barrier “Kailand, I
don’t know how I can help you.” He looks at me disappointed for a moment, but
too proud to remain that way “I don’t know how you can help either. But please
come back. Everyone here has already lost their mind, many of them are
beginning to turn to stone. They don’t die, they don’t talk, they don’t move. I
don’t want to be like that…” my heart breaks for him and I realize that I truly
want to believe all that he is saying and help him. “I promise I will come
back, I don’t know when, but I will. When I do, you can tell me all the ways I
might be able to get you out of this thing…” He smiles politely as though he is
afraid to believe my words as well. I turn to leave the cave “Goodbye,
Kailand.” He smiles my way for the last time “Until we meet again, Ilyana.”

Hearing
my name on his lips softens a part of me and my pity begins to melt into rage.
How any Nephilim could do this to an entire family is beyond my comprehension.
I begin to run back towards where I believe the house is and pray I am correct
so I can make it back before dark.

Ephraim:

I
can’t believe this is what my life has amounted to, I was just bested in a
fight by a young female Nephilim, I am living in the woods with my best friend
who is consequently also one of the biggest outcasts of my generation and I am
reading a book about fairy tales to try to find some answers. If this isn’t
emasculating I really don’t know what is. Wait, I know what is more
emasculating than this, how dare she push me like that! I didn’t even see it
coming, according to her and Levi, she hasn’t even accessed her power during
training some days. How could she possibly use so much force on me? It’s not
that I didn’t deserve it, but I have never felt a burst of Nephilim power being
used against me in that way before. She was like a goddess. I knew she was
powerful when I followed the path of the demons she destroyed before, but that
was instinct, she couldn’t have controlled it if she tried and her body and
mind was so overcome by the experience that she still didn’t even recall
anything. But this was something completely different, she was being fueled by
anger, towards me. I rest my head in my hands and lean forward on the table, I
know she is fragile, I should’ve been more understanding, she is so simple and
happy and I was doing everything in my power to complicate her. I deserve her
anger and her hate.

I hear
the front door open and my heart stands still for a moment, I listen for her
but am disappointed to see Levi rounding the corner. He asks me how training
was today and at first I don’t know how to answer “That’s a loaded question if
ever I heard one.” He pulls up a chair across from me “Lay it on me, how bad
was it?” My eyebrows pull tight as I think about how to say it “She kicked my
ass.” His eyes lighten and he laughs and hits me on the back “Well there’s a
first time for everything! She’s a really fast runner, but I never would’ve
expected that!” he obviously doesn’t know what I mean and I am a little
insulted that he so easily believes that she could beat me in hand to hand
combat. “Not like that, Levi. I made her mad and she charged me and then sent
me flying flat on my back with her powers.
She doesn’t run that fast.”
I
am surprised by how insulted I am at the thought of someone being stronger than
me.

He
immediately begins to quiz me on how we trained, I tell him about the running
and stairs, then I tell him about our fight, he is hanging on by the edge of
his seat by the time I am finished “Dammit, Ephraim! If I had known all she
needed was to be pissed off, I would’ve suggested you train with her a lot
sooner. That’s phenomenal! I have spent days attempting what you managed to
pull off in a few short hours, hell hath no fury and all, I guess….”  I catch
his dual meaning and while it would lead to a fight with anyone else, Levi is
the brother I never had, he knows of my lineage and never once has he used it
against me, so I know better than to be upset with him at this point.

I ask
him about his training techniques, what worked for them and how she accessed
her powers when he was around. I feel like we are on the precipice of something
here, but I just don’t know what. At first he describes a boring technique to
me about shutting of her thoughts and light switches. I begin to lose interest
but then he points out that his training exercises are all centered around her
learning to gain control. “I just don’t get it. She didn’t show any control
whatsoever when she threw me across an arena, it’s like she just lost it and
acted without even meaning to. She ran off completely ashamed and shocked. I
actually thought that maybe it was her coming home when I heard you come in, I
might need to call Alya and begin searching for her, it’s been awhile…” He
looks annoyed with me for a moment and I know that he is about to lecture me
about letting her run off on her own, but then his expression changes into a
look of excitement as he looks down to the table in front of me “Ephraim! I
think I’ve got it!” his words are running together and his time in Scotland is
beginning to show “We’ve spent the last two weeks searching for the object that
is her anchor, the girl never owned any real jewelry or family relics of any kind.
What if the anchor isn’t an object? What if instead of looking for a ‘what’ we
should be looking for a ‘who’?” I realize my crazy outcast friend may have a
point and his words are spilling out faster now “She accessed her power with me
using control and her power with you in a fit of rage or passion, if you will.
I know when I access my power after some time away from it, there has to be an
element of passion and control, or else I am prone to misfire or complacency!”

I
realize he must be right “So, are you saying you think we are her anchors?” he
sits back with a satisfied look on his face “Aye, Brother. That we are! Now we
just need to prove it.” I am following him but have a hard time believing she
would agree to train further with me after our incident today “Levi, I can’t
ask her to train with both of us, I have rarely seen someone as angry with me
as she was today and after what she did, she was clearly scared.” His
expression grows serious as we hear the front door opening once again “Just
leave it to me, Brother.”

She
walks through the door and looks completely broken. I have no clue what to say
to her or how to approach her. I know that I am the reason for the despondent
look on her face and I feel an overwhelming urge to walk up to her, wrap her in
my arms and tell her everything will be ok. Instead, like to coward I am, I
allow Levi to do it for me. “Little Princess, I hear you’ve had a big day.” I
feel annoyed at him freely using a pet name with her, he has always been so
good with others, I guess that is because he genuinely likes everyone. He
continues on “Don’t be so hard on yourself, Ephraim and I are really proud of
the progress you made today and we have a theory I want to run past you.” We
both wait for her to respond but she just stares at the ground in front of her
for a moment, she creases her eyebrows and pulls her lips together in a tight
pout and suddenly there is a mask of regret and sadness on her face, I hate
knowing that I am to blame for putting it there she looks to Levi and in a very
small voice responds “Well, you’ve certainly earned the right, you can tell me
whatever it is.” She looks like she is waiting for us to drop a bomb or send
her away, I wish she could see how important she is to me – to us.

I
stand up and she makes eye contact with me for a brief second, I see how broken
she is and want so desperately to fix it. Levi continues speaking as he rubs
her arm in a way that I believe is meant to be soothing for her, but ironically
for me, it is almost enough to make my blood boil “We think we’ve found your
anchor, it’s not a relic or an old piece of jewelry, we think it is us, we both
want a chance to train with you tomorrow, you and I with our control methods
and Ephraim with his, uhh, power methods.” He awkwardly tries to grasp for a
word besides passion or rage. She looks at me again and without breaking eye
contact responds “I don’t know that it will do much good. But, I just can’t
tell you no.” For a moment I forget what she’s talking about but then Levi shakes
her arm in an excited way and he laughs “Attagirl! I knew you would be game for
it! We should discuss it with you tonight, see how you feel when it happens –
that will probably help us figure out what we need to work past to get to your
gifts.” She smiles politely and looks up to him “I just don’t know if I can do
that tonight, Levi. It has been a long day and I am spent, plus I don’t really
know if I can even describe what is occurring in my head when I reach my gifts,
it’s a little different every time, there is not one base emotion or thought
that makes it happen.” She looks at me again and turns back to him and waits
for his response.

She
used to look at me like that and wait for me to respond. I know that I messed
up now, even more than before. Just the fact that she feels like she has to ask
for rest says a lot about what we – what I, have put her through the last few
days. He looks disappointed, but only for a moment, I know that she catches it
because her expression falls, but he quickly covers and makes up an excuse
about winging it, he tells her it might be best that way and it will help us
really access her truest abilities and emotions. I have no clue what he is
saying and I honestly don’t think he does either, but she seems satisfied with
the response as she smiles at us both and begins to walk towards her room.

I
don’t know how or why, but I lose control when I see her walk through the door
and immediately hurry behind her, I have to bury this hatchet. I can live with
kings and queens, the elders and the high counsel all angry at me, but I can’t
live knowing that I have upset her.