The Hawk and the Jewel (Kensington Chronicles 1) (35 page)

She shifted, and the smell of her hair rose to assail his senses. Brandon wondered just how long he could keep up the big brother act, when all he wanted, whenever she was near him, was to crush her in his arms.

You'll keep it up,
he told himself firmly,
just as long as you need to, or you'll destroy everything between you. Please, Lord,
his heart went on,
please give me strength to wait for her. Show her. Lord, that I am a man, a man who would cherish her for all my years.

Brandon's prayers and the rocking of the carriage finally got to him. He had asked everyone to be ready early that morning, and now the dawn departure was starting to catch up with him. With his mind picturing how Sunny would look surrounded by several dark-haired children, Brandon fell asleep.

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The drive to Ravenscroft came into view, and Sunny smiled. She had ridden out by herself this time, not something that was usually encouraged, but she'd felt an urgent need to be alone. Rand had said they would come sometime and go through the house, but with her coming out, his plan had never materialized.

Sunny walked around the neglected courtyard and knew she didn't have to go inside. From the placement of the windows, she could imagine the interior. She sat on the low stone wall that surrounded the base of a tree and prayed, Lady's reins hanging from her ringers.

Sunny asked God to give her this house and to let it be a place of peace and caring. She asked Him to prepare Rand and Chelsea's heart before she talked with them.

"I'll not go against their wishes, Lord," she said as she stepped up on the wall and boosted herself back into the saddle. "If I don't have Rand and Chelsea's approval, I'll let the matter drop and rest in You."

It was with some regret that Sunny rode away from the house, partly because Rand and Chelsea would not be home for another two weeks, and partly because the few times she was near Ravens-croft, she felt as if she'd come home.

* * *

"Well, Jordan," Andrea greeted him kindly as she entered the small salon, "what a delightful surprise."

"Good morning. I hope I'm not coming at a bad time." Jordan gave her a tentative smile that left Andrea confused. She didn't think he had ever been hesitant to come to Willows' End.

"Your timing is just fine, but I'm afraid Sunny isn't here. She went riding."

"Actually, I'm here to see Holly."

**Oh, I'll have her sent down. Do make yourself comfortable."

Jordan was anything but comfortable as he waited. Holly had been so heavily on his mind since the night of the ball that he had thought he would go crazy thinking about her. Why it had taken until that morning for him to realize he could go and talk with her was a mystery to him. But here he was at last, and for some reason, unaccountably nervous.

"Sunny isn't here." Holly's voice sounded from near the door.

Jordan spun away from studying a picture he had seen a hundred times before and frowned as Holly's words registered.

"I didn't come to see Sunny. I came to see you."

"Binks said as much, but I was sure he was mistaken."

"No, he wasn't. I came to see you," Jordan repeated.

"Why?" Holly asked bluntly, leaving Jordan thoroughly nonplussed.

"Can't I come to visit you?" he finally asked.

"You never have before." Holly's voice had been very kind through this entire exchange, but Jordan knew something was amiss. Holly simply didn't talk to him this way. She had always been thrilled
to
see him, making him feel at home and as though his very presence had brightened her day.

"Would you like
to
go for a ride?" Jordan tried a change of subject.

"I don't like to ride," Holly told him, her voice showing her hurt that he couldn't remember even that.

"I'm sorry...I forgot. A walk then." Jordan was not to be put off. "It's a beautiful day."

Now it was Holly's turn to frown. "Jordan, if you want to wait for Sunny, you don't have to entertain me while you do so."

"Fm not here for Sunny," Jordan replied, thinking this was the oddest conversation he had ever had. "I came to see you. I've done something to hurt you, and I'd like to take a walk so we can discuss it." It felt so good to have all of this said that Jordan let out a gusty sigh.

Holly couldn't help smiling. Jordan took it as an olive branch.

"Please walk with me for a while?"

"All right," Holly agreed, albeit unwillingly. "My music teacher comes today, so I can't be gone long." Holly knew it was an excuse and wondered if Jordan saw through it.

With a somber nod Jordan agreed, and they headed out the door. It was a beautiful day just as Jordan had stated, and for a time they walked in complete silence.

"Have you heard from Miles?" Jordan suddenly asked, and Holly wondered, a bit testily, how many times they were going to play this scene.

"You know, Jordan," she stopped suddenly and spoke with some annoyance. "I've come to realize that our only links are Sunny and Miles. If neither one of them existed, you wouldn't care if you ever

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saw me again. So I think it might be better to stop pretending. You needn't worry about anything you might have said or done to me, because I'm fine.** It was not the complete truth, but Holly knew that given time, she would be fine. In fact, she felt better just having said it.

Holly cook Jordan's silence as agreement. Turning, she started back toward the house. She was surprised speechless when his hand shot out and captured her wrist. With a gentle but determined move he brought her back to stand directly in front of him.

"That isn't true," he stated with more force than Holly had ever heard from him.

"Yes it is." Holly's voice was equally firm. "You're just denying it to spare my feelings, and there's really no need."

Jordan's hands were on her upper arms now, and he drew her even closer. He bent his head until his face was very near to her own and then spoke.

"I don't know where you've picked up such a ridiculous idea, but it isn't true. And-** he cut her off when she opened her mouth to speak, "if you tell me that's not true, you're calling me a liar. I wouldn't care to hear that from you."

"What would you care to hear from me?" Holly tried to keep her voice light, so Jordan would not know the way his touch had affected her.

Jordan's eyes searched her hair and features. Her hair was raven black and pulled into an elegant chignon at the back of her head. Her eyes were wide and dark, and her skin looked like the first rose of a spring day. Added to all of this, Jordan thought she was the most compassionate, kindhearted woman he'd ever known. Her sweetness was something he had always admired in her. Suddenly he couldn't remember what she had asked him.

"This hasn't gone the way I'd hoped it would. I don't have any more answers about what's happened between us than when I arrived, but I have to leave for London. I will tell you this however, we
will
talk. My father has business for me, and I don't know how long I'll be away. It could be weeks, but when I return-"

Jordan lost track of his own thoughts when he realized how soft her arms felt beneath his hands. His eyes followed the movements of his own fingers as they lightly stroked the skin above Holly's elbows.

"Your skin is so soft, Holly," Jordan whispered as though to

himself. "Why have I never noticed how soft your skin is?"

Jordan's glance flickered back to Holly's face, and the unreadable look she sported made him drop his hands as though he'd been burned. Holly felt bereft at the loss of his touch.

"I'll see you when I get back," Jordan's voice was now stiff. Holly didn't move a muscle as she watched his tall, lean form walk away. Only minutes passed before she heard the beat of his horse's hooves as he rode from the stable yard.

Her hands came to her arms then, touching herself in the place where his hands had lain. Holly's heart could have easily left reality and gone into dreams over the words Jordan had said, and the look she'd seen in his eyes, but she swiftly reined in her thoughts.

He's in love with Sunny,
she reminded herself,
and all thf hoping in the world is not going to change et thing. If you let your heart stray, you'll only hurt more than you do ryjht now.

275

sunny and holly listened with rapt attention to Rand and Chelsea's details of their trip. They had gone north to stay with old family friends, Lord Philip and Lady Denise Briton, whose hospitality and estate size worked together to allow one to lose oneself figuratively, sometimes literally. Rand and Chelsea had slept late, enjoyed leisurely teas, gone horseback riding, and wandered the area in restful peace and comfort. The Britons were often away from home, but hospitality was always extended at their front door.

Rand and Chelsea looked very relaxed when they returned, and didn't appear to want to move an inch from the upstairs salon, not even when Binks announced that Holly had a visitor. Sunny was not at all sorry to have Rand and Chelsea to herself for a moment, and as she began to pace just a bit, they both stared at her.

"Did something happen that upset you while we were gone?** Chelsea wanted to know.

"Not really, but I want to talk to you, and I don't know how to start.**

Rand felt a bit alarmed. If he didn't know better he would have said she was planning yet another scheme. Sunny had done nothing of the sort since she'd come to Christ, and even though she was as lively and fan-loving as ever, the frantic search for happiness was gone. Rand hoped it would stay that way.

"Actually, it's about my birthday present," Sunny finally said.

Rand found himself relaxing; birthday gifts he could handle.

"Your birthday
is
coming up," Chelsea encouraged her. "Did you have something special in mind?"

"Yes,** Sunny answered with a smile. **I wish for your blessing, because I want to move into Ravenscroft.**

If Sunny had told them she had eloped while they had been away, she couldn't have shocked them more.

"If I don't have your blessing, I won't go, but I hope you'll hear me out.** Sunny waited for her brother's nod before continuing.

"I tell in love with Ravenscroft the first time I saw it, and I think it would suit me very well. I probably feel that way because Grand-mama Sunny and I are alike. I can't really explain it beyond that, except to say that Ravenscroft has utterly captured my fancy."

Sunny's eyes were shining with such peace and warmth that Rand and Chelsea could only stare at her. Chelsea knew at that moment that she had never really faced the fact that Sunny and Holly would move away someday. There were several points Chelsea could have raised in argument, but she didn't really believe any of them herself. Rand, being the logical person that he was, spoke his very valid thoughts.

"You can't live at Ravenscroft alone, Sunny." Rand's voice was regretful, and Chelsea knew he wanted to grant Sunny's request. "Even if youVe a passel of servants around, you
cannot^
at 18 years old, go off and live alone.**

"IVe given that quite a bit of thought," Sunny told him, still very much willing to bow to his judgment. "And if it*s all right with you, I'll write Aunt Lucy and ask her to live with me. She's a bit eccentric, but I do care for her. She and I have written to each other often, and the last time Holly and I were with her, she told us how much she would love to live in the country.**

Rand nodded slowly in thought. Aunt Lucy was the last person who would have come to his mind, but in some ways she was perfect for Sunny. In other ways...well, for the moment Rand's mind refused to think on it.

"Write Aunt Lucy, Sunny, and see what she has to say. We'll keep this quiet for the time being, but we'll definitely move as far in that direction as we can go."

Rand earned a huge hug from his sister and watched quietly as she dashed from the room. He stared at the closed portal until he felt his wife's eyes on him.

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"I never really thought she'd move away."

"Oh, Rand, I was just thinking that myself. Fm awfully glad I came home so rested, or Fd be bursting into tears."

Rand stared at the drops pooling swiftly in her eyes. "It looks like it's going to happen anyway."

"I think you're right," Chelsea said with a sob. Thinking he might very well cry himself, Rand pulled her against his chest.

* * *

Sunny wasted no time in writing to Aunt Lucy, and everyone was a little surprised at how swiftly the plans moved. Sunny's birthday passed in a flurry of preparation, for she was determined to be at Ravenscroft by Christmas. Brandon heard of her plans and came one afternoon. He saw Rand first, and the older man could see that the young duke was barely holding his temper in check.

"Aunt Lucy has the sense of a peahen, Rand. How in the world are they going to do on their own out there?**