The Humans (15 page)
Authors: Stephen Karam
BRIGID | AIMEE |
Why? | So hey, while everyone's |
 | wasted . . . I'm having my |
 | intestine taken out next month, |
 | when I leave my job, / so . . . |
 | just FYI people. |
ERIK | RICHARD |
Oh man . . . | What? |
AIMEE
Can I crash with you guys post-surgery? / . . . thought I'd let you guys take care of me?
ERIK
Yeah, God, we might . . . of course you can, God, / of course, Aimee . . .
Aimee notices Deirdre is on the verge of tears.
AIMEE
Mom, I'm gonna be fine don't freak outâ
DEIRDRE | ERIK |
     | Yeah, yeah . . . just we might |
I know, I know . . . | be moving soon if, uhâ |
AIMEE
Really?âI thoughtâthe sewers won't be in yet . . .
Deirdre continues to roll Momo toward the basement door.
DEIRDRE | MOMO |
Yeah, tell 'em about the sewers. / | Â Â Â Â Â |
 | . . . wheres'll her annear . . . do |
 | you go hole in a wheres do you |
 | go hole in a wheres do go hole |
 | in a where to go hole in a |
 | wheres . . . where do we go |
 | hole in a . . . |
AIMEE | BRIGID |
What's going on? | . . . Mom . . . [what's wrong?] . . . |
ERIK | DEIRDRE |
Nothing, nothing stay here, | Â Â Â Â Â |
okay?âeveryone's okay . . . | I'm okay, stay here . . . |
     |  |
Would you let them in upstairs? | Â |
Deirdre and Momo exit.
RICHARD
Sure . . .
Richard goes upstairs, opens the upstairs door and waits in the hallway for Momo and Deirdre to get off the elevator.
AIMEE
Are you sick?
ERIK
No no, no one's sick, we're good, just . . . we sold the lake property, okay? / To help withâ
AIMEE | BRIGID |
Okay . . . | What . . . when . . . ? |
ERIK
[Not important] . . . St. Paul's let me go, okay, so we've had to / tighten our belts and we're figuring outâ
BRIGID
Why would they let you go?
ERIK
âthat's not [important]âI'm not getting my pension now, they could fire me before it kicked in, all right / so nowâ
AIMEE
They can take away / your pensionâ?
ERIK
It's [complicated]âthey're a private school so / they can do whateverâ
AIMEE
Butâwhy did they fire you?
ERIK
It's [complicated]âthey have this morality code, okay?, / St. Paul's makesâ
AIMEE
Okay . . .
ERIK
âyou sign it / and if youâ
BRIGID
Why would a morality codeâwere you, like, selling drugs on the playground?
ERIK
There was an incident and . . . all right?, so / they couldâ
BRIGID
What kind ofâ
ERIK
They could fire me . . . because of this incident, it'sâ
AIMEE
What are you talking about?
ERIK
I cheated on your mom, with, uh, a teacher from school and . . . we're okay but, I realize this is a lot to just [unload] . . . you guys okay?â
AIMEE | BRIGID |
[Uh, not really . . .] | Just . . . [keep going] . . . |
ERIK
âwe worked through it, okay?, / we met with Father Quinn and . . .
AIMEE
Okay . . .
ERIK
. . . we're good, but people talk and we don't want you hearing from other people, okay? / We'd rather you hear it from us, okay? . . .
AIMEE
Okay, so . . . okay, so you guys . . . you just want us to . . . just . . . to know? . . .
ERIK
Yeah, and I'm already at a Walmart in Danville / just to keep money coming inâ
AIMEE
God, Dad . . . for how long?â
BRIGID
Why the one in Danville?
ERIK
I don't want kids from school seeing me there. Something full-time should open up this spring, so . . . / the trick's been . . .
AIMEE
. . . so . . .
ERIK
. . . the cost of taking care of Momo's been a surprise, / you wouldn't even believe how much the [medical stuff costs]â
BRIGID | AIMEE |
Are you guys . . . | . . . okay . . . |
 | So you're behind? |
 | How much are you behind? |
 | ERIK |
Can Mom not retire now?â | I don't want you [worrying about]â |
AIMEE
Would I be able to help out? . . . orâis it too much for me to evenâ
ERIK
I thinkâyou've lost your job / and'll have your own medical stuff to [worry about]â
AIMEE
Okay, I know, I know but I still want to know how deep a hole you're in.
Being buzzed almost makes things worse for Aimee and Brigid.
UPSTAIRS
:
Richard now holds the door open; Deirdre wheels Momo inside. She doesn't get far before she begins to hear the argument downstairs; it stops her from taking Momo to the bathroom.
ERIK
The plan is to sell the house and rent an apartment, we don't need space / anymore . . .
BRIGID
Are there even apartments in Scranton? / Who lives inâ
AIMEE | ERIK |
Of course there areâ | Hey, getting a place on one |
 | level will be good, Mom won't |
 | be climbing stairsâ |
AIMEE
It doesn't sound good, Dad / âit sounds like you're in a deep holeâ
ERIK
I'm working it out, Aimeeâ
AIMEE
Do you have
anything
saved?
Dad
, do you have any / savings?â
ERIK
We don't
have
savings, Aimee /
we've been stretchedâ
AIMEE
âokay, okay
well you're telling us this when you're drunk
/ so sorry if I'm getting frustrated . . .
ERIK
âwell we haven't had savings for years.
BRIGID
Have you asked Uncle John to help?
AIMEE
He lives in a trailer, / you thinkâ
BRIGID
That doesn't mean he has no moneyâ
AIMEE
That's
exactly
what it means, / grow up . . . [fucking baby] . . .
BRIGID | ERIK |
Relax, I'm just . . . [I'm | Don't get upset with her, hey |
shocked, I don't know what | this is on meâ |
I'm saying . . .] sorry I'm not | Â |
grown up like you and make | Â |
a ton of moneyâ | Â |
AIMEE
Right, you've got no choice but to collect unemployment / while you try toâit's not unfair for you to get some marketable skillsâ
BRIGID | ERIK |
That's not fairâI can't get a | Hey easy, cut it out. Stop it, |
break if I'm working | both of you, stop, this is on me |
full-time . . . | andâ |
 |      |
 | âhey, I'm working it out, / |
 | I love your mom, we're good . . . |
Brigid isn't sure what to do; something's fallen apart for her, thoughts spinning . . .
UPSTAIRS
:
Hearing their argument, Deirdre heads for the staircase. Richard attends Momo.
BRIGID
No, I'm glad you're working it out butâ
you're
good
but you're not sleeping and Mom's still eating her
feelings, / it's freaking me outâ
AIMEE
    Â
(Referring to Deirdre at the top of the stairs)
Brigid.
Brigid turns, sees Deirdre at the top of the staircase. She heads upstairs to apologize.
BRIGID
Mom . . . / I didn't mean it . . .
ERIK
Stay here . . .
Aimee goes after Brigid.
ERIK
Would you stay down here, please? Brigid!
AIMEE | DEIRDRE |
Dad give her some space, | Go talk to your father, please, / |
okay, we're doing our bestâ | I |
 | wrong with me, it's not a news |
 | flash. |
BRIGID
MomâI will, butâI don't [think that]âI think something's wrong with
everyoneâ
please don't act like a martyr / when I'm trying to apologize . . . you think
I'm
wrong to not wanna get married in a church soâ
AIMEE | MOMO |
Hey, hey, you're sorry, don't | Â Â Â Â Â |
yell at her, okay / . . . just | Nevery blacken where you come |
chill out? | back do we go do we wheren |
 | blezzick . . . blacken where you |
 | come back do we go do . . . |
ERIK
Can you guys come down and talk to me please!
Thud.
AIMEE | BRIGID |
Dad you're not helping, let | Â Â Â Â Â |
me handle this . . . | Can you go up and tell that |
 | lady how loud she's being? |
ERIK | RICHARD |
Brigid! | I will, just relax. |
Thud.
AIMEE
Dad, / please shuttup . . .
BRIGID | MOMO |
I'll do it myself . . . / I need | Â Â Â Â Â |
a breatherâ | Nevery blacken where you |
 | come back do we go do we |
 | wheren blezzick . . . nevery |
 | where do we go back do we |
 | never go, where do we go hole |
 | you bitch . . . |
Momo's growing agitation captures Aimee's attention.
Deirdre is massaging Momo's hand, for herself as much as for Momo.
RICHARD | AIMEE |
Hey, hey hey no, noâlet's | (Regarding Momo, to Deirdre) |
go for a walk, okay?â | . . . is she okay? |