The Lays of Beleriand (53 page)

55. Taur-nu-Fuin C: the line as written on the B-text still had Taur-na-Fuin.

140. Beor's son: changed on one of the copies of D to the Beoring, i.e. a man of Beor's house. This was a change made when the genealogy had been greatly extended and Barahir was no longer Beor's son but his remote descendant (see P. 198).

249-330. In this section of the Canto the rewriting on (or inserted into) the B-text exists in two versions, one the immediate fore-runner of the other. The difference between them is that in the earlier Gorlim was still, as in the earlier Lay, taken to Angband and to Morgoth himself. Thus the passage in the first rewriting corresponding to lines 255 - 66 reads: to Angband and the iron halls where laboured Morgoth's hopeless thralls; and there with bonds on hand and foot to grievous torment he was put

In what follows the two versions are the same, except that in the first it is Morgoth, not Sauron: precisely the same lines are used of each. But at lines 306-x x the first version has: Then Gorlim wavered, and he drew

half back; but Morgoth's daunting eyes

there held him. To the Lord of Lies

'tis vain in lies the breath to spend:

as he began, so he must end,

and all must answer as he could

and at lines 318-21 Morgoth says:

Thou fool! A phantom thou didst see

that Sauron my servant made to snare

thy lovesick wits. Naught else was there.

Cold 'tis with Sauron's wraiths to wed!

547. The word aghast is marked with an X in C (because Beren was not aghast).

567-8. At first the passage in B (p. 167, lines 369 - 82) beginning No more his hidden bowstring sings was scarcely changed in the rewriting, but as first written C had (old lines 376 - g): found him no more. The stars that burn

about the North with silver fire

that Varda wrought, the Burning Briar

as Men it called in days long gone

Old lines 373 - 5 were then cut out and 376 - g rewritten: The stars that burn with silver fire

about the North, the Burning Briar

that Varda lit in ages gone

This was in turn changed to the text given, lines 567 - 8.

581. In one of the copies of D an X is placed against this line. I think this was probably very late and marks my father's changed ideas concerning the making of the Sun and Moon.

596. Nan Elmoth: in the preliminary draft the name of the wood was first Glad-uial, emended to Glath-uial; then Gilam-moth, emended to Nan Elmoth. It was here that the name Nan Elmoth emerged.

627. In one of the drafts of this passage the line is from Waking Water far away.

634. In one of the drafts of this passage Tar-Melian stands in the margin as an alternative.

Commentary on lines 1 - 660.

A strictly chronological account of the evolution of the legends of the Elder Days would have to consider several other works before the revisions to the Lay of Leithian were reached. By treating the Lay revised and unrevised as an entity and not piecemeal I jump these stages, and names which had in fact emerged a good while before appear here for the first time in this 'History'. I do little more than list them: 65. Menegroth

89. elanor and niphredil. At line 125 is -a reference to the golden elanor.

115. Middle-earth

149 ff. The names of the men of Barahir's band, beside Beren and Gorlim: Dagnir, Ragnor, Radhruin, Dairuin, Gildor, Urthel, Arthad, Hathaldir; Belegund and Baragund.

Belegund and Baragund are the sons of Bregolas (Barahir's brother); and Gorlim is the son of Angrim (199).

All these names appear in The Silmarillion (pp. 155, 162).

161. 'the fen of reedy Serech.' Beren came on the Orcs at the well of Rivil, which 'rises from the fell/down into Serech's reeds to flow' (434 - 5).

162. Felagund is called Inglor (Inglor Felagund in the sub-title, P 335).

182, 560. Dorthonion

186. Elbereth

196, etc. (Tarn) Aeluin

255, etc. Sauron

259,347. Gaurhoth. Cf. Tol-in-Gaurhoth 'Isle of Werewolves' in The Silmarillion.

434. Rivil

494. Hador

512. Dagmor. Beren's sword is named nowhere else.

519. Gorgol the Butcher. He is named nowhere else.

520. Ladros (the lands to the north-east of Dorthonion that were granted by the Noldorin kings to the Men of the House of Beor).

520. Drun. This name is marked on the later of the 'Silmarillion'

maps (that on which the published map was based) as north of Aeluin and west of Ladros, but is named in no other place.

574. Gorgorath. This has occurred in the prose outline for Canto X of the Lay, but in the form Corgoroth (p. 272).

596, etc. Nan Elmoth. See note to line 596.

634. Ar-Melian (Tar-Melian). The name is not found elsewhere with either prefix.

659. Ezellohar (the Green Mound of the Two Trees in Valinor).

In addition may be noted here Dungorthin (52), where the new version changes the old lines 49 - 50

To North there lay the Land of Dread

whence only evil pathways led

to

To North there lay a land of dread,

Dungorthin where all ways were dead

In the old version 'the Land of Dread' clearly meant, simply, 'the land of Morgoth'. Here Dungorthin is placed as it is in The Silmarillion (p.

121), between the Mountains of Terror and the northern bound of the Girdle of Melian; see p. 314.

In the revised Lay the story of Gorlim was greatly developed. In the old (see pp. 162 - 4, 169-70), Gorlim left his companions and went 'to meet / with hidden friend within a dale', he found 'a homestead looming pale', and within it he saw a phantom of Eilinel. He left the house, in fear of Morgoth's hunters and wolves, and returned to his companions; but after some days he deliberately sought out Morgoth's servants and offered to betray his fellows. He was taken to the halls of Morgoth-who does not say that the wraith was set to decoy Gorlim:

a wraith of that which might have been,

methinks, it is that thou hast seen!

(But in lines 241 - 2 it is said that 'men believed that Morgoth made/the fiendish phantom'.)

There is also a remarkable development in the revised Lay, in that 'the XII Beorings' (one would expect XIII, including Barahir himself) of Dorthonion were the very men who saved King Felagund in the Battle of Sudden Flame:

For these it was, the chosen men

of Beor's house, who in the fen

of reedy Serech stood at bay

about King Inglor in the day

of his defeat... (159-63) In?he Silmarillion the story is that 'Morgoth pursued [Barahir) to the death, until at last there remained to him only twelve companions'

(p. 162): there is no suggestion that these survivors were a picked band, already joined as companions in an earlier heroic deed.

Felagund (Inglor) is now said to have m turned to Nargothrond (lines 166 - 7) after his rescue by Barahir and his men (see pp. 85-6).

From this point onwards substantial rewriting of the poem is restricted to a few sections.

Canto III continued.

From the end of the rewritten opening of the poem (line 660 above) the D

typescript continues as a copy of B to the end of the poem, but though it was certainly made under my father's supervision it is of very minor textual value in itself.

The passage in the original text (p. 173) lines 453 (Thus Thingol sailed not on the seas) to 470 was left unchanged; but for lines 471 (In later days when Morgoth first) to approximately 613 my father substituted 142 lines of new verse (omitting the long retrospective passage lines 563 ff. concerning Beren's journey over the Mountains of Terror), in which there is very little of the old Lay, and as the passage proceeds progressively less. There is no doubt that these lines are (relatively) very late: an apparently contemporaneous piece of rewriting in Canto X is certainly post-1955 (see p. 360), and they may well be considerably later than that. There is a quantity of rough draft material in manuscript but also a typescript made by my father of the first 103 lines, inserted into the D-text.

In later days, when Morgoth fled

from wrath and raised once more his head

and Iron Crown, his mighty seat

beneath the smoking mountain's feet

founded and fortified anew, 5

then slowly dread and darkness grew:

the Shadow of the North that all

the Folk of Earth would hold in thrall.

The lords of Men to knee he brings,

the kingdoms of the Exiled Kings 10

assails with ever-mounting war:

in their last havens by the shore

they dwell, or strongholds walled with fear

defend upon his borders drear,

till each one falls. Yet reign there still IS

in Doriath beyond his will

the Grey King and immortal Queen.

No evil in their realm is seen;

no power their might can yet surpass:

there still is laughter and green grass, 20

there leaves are lit by the white sun,

and many marvels are begun.

There went now in the Guarded Realm

beneath the beech, beneath the elm,

there lightfoot ran now on the green 25

the daughter of the king and queen:

of Arda's eldest children born

in beauty of their elven-morn

and only child ordained by birth

to walk in raiment of the Earth 30

from Those descended who began

before the world of Elf and Man.

Beyond the bounds of Arda far

still shone the Legions, star on star,

memorials of their labour long, 35

achievement of Vision and of Song;

and when beneath their ancient light

on Earth below was cloudless night,

music in Doriath awoke,

and there beneath the branching oak, 40

or seated on the beech-leaves brown,

Daeron the dark with ferny crown

played on his pipes with elvish art

unbearable by mortal heart.

No other player has there been, 45

no other lips or fingers seen

so skilled, 'tis said in elven-lore,

save Maelor* son of Feanor,

forgotten harper, singer doomed,

who young when Laurelin yet bloomed 50

to endless lamentation passed

and in the tombless sea was cast.+

But Daeron in his heart*s delight

yet lived and played by starlit night,

until one summer-eve befell, 55

as still the elven harpers tell.

Then merrily his piping trilled;

the grass was soft, the wind was stilled,

the twilight lingered faint and cool

in shadow-shapes upon the pool f 60

beneath the boughs of sleeping trees

standing silent. About their knees

a mist of hemlocks glimmered pale,

and ghostly moths on lace-wings frail

went to and fro. Beside the mere 65

quickening, rippling, rising clear

the piping called. Then forth she came,

as sheer and sudden as a flame

of peerless white the shadows cleaving,

her maiden-bower on white feet leaving; 70

and as when summer stars arise

(* Both Maglor and Maelor appear in the draft manuacripts of this passage. The final typescript has Maelor, changed to Maglor, but not I think by my father.

+ In The Silmarillion (p.254) it is not said that Maglor ended his life in the sea: he cast the Silmaril into the sea, 'and thereafter he wandered ever upon the shores, singing in pain and regret beside the waves'.

| There is no other reference to a 'pool' or 'mere' at the place in the woods where Beren came upon Luthien.)

radiant into darkened skies,

her living light on all was cast

in fleeting silver as she passed.

There now she stepped with elven pace, 75

bending and swaying in her grace,

as half-reluctant; then began

to dance, to dance: in mazes ran

bewildering, and a mist of white

was wreathed about her whirling flight. 80

Wind-ripples on the water flashed,

and trembling leaf and flower were plashed

with diamond-dews, as ever fleet

and fleeter went her winged feet.

Her long hair as a cloud was streaming 85

about her arms uplifted gleaming,

as slow above the trees the Moon

in glory of the plenilune

arose, and on the open glade

its light serene and clear was laid. 90

Then suddenly her feet were stilled,

and through the woven wood there thrilled,

half wordless, half in elven-tongue,

her voice upraised in blissful song

that once of nightingales she learned 95

and in her living joy had turned

to heart-enthralling loveliness,

unmarred, immortal, sorrowless.

Ir Ithil ammen Eruchin

menel-vir sila diriel 100

si loth a galadh lasto din!