Ivyanne smiled. ‘It’s not how you see yourself that we’re talking about, is it?’ She sighed. ‘Anyway, knowing, as I had, since childhood that I was promised to someone else, I shut my heart off... until
you came along.’
Lincoln’s doubt must have been written all over his face, because she laughed.
‘Don’t forget that I grew up surrounded by people, tripping over themselves to be around me because of my title. But you fell for me without knowing my worth, so I opened my heart to you.’ She frowned. ‘I was a stupid teenager-I didn’t think you’d come back after the first summer, or the second. But there you were, every year.....’ She shook her head sorrowfully. ‘I’ve no excuse for my behavior-I just couldn’t stay away from you. Even though I knew it could never amount to anything.’
Lincoln’s heartbeat began to accelerate. ‘You tried to warn me,’ he said softly. ‘I didn’t exactly heed you.’
‘No you didn’t. But if I’d been stronger or smarter-I would have done the right thing and ended it. I could have asked mum to go elsewhere, or told you I was involved...’ Her eyes met his and they were charged with electric green sorrow. ‘I’m sorry.’ She hung her head, so that her curls fell in a curtain around her face. ‘I thought I had another year-but mum had other plans. I cried for weeks.’
Lincoln reached out and ran the back of his hand down the silken veil between them. ‘So did I.’
‘Oh god...’ Ivyanne sniffled and wiped her hand under her eyes then peeked up at him through her hair. ‘At first I hated mum separating us-but in time, I started to see that it was for the best. And when I saw her this morning and she told me-’
‘This
morning?!’ Lincoln demanded. ‘She’s nearby?!’
Ivyanne cringed. ‘Yes...at our summer house.’
Lincoln was floored. ‘Where?’
Ivyanne pursed her lips together and shook her head from side to side. ‘Knowing that won’t help this Lincoln. The point is-I went to see her to confess that I couldn’t choose because I was still in love with you-only for
her to turn around and say that she was fully aware of that, and had allowed me to come here to say good-bye.’ She frowned. ‘All of these years I thought I’d been deceiving her but not only was she aware of you and I-but she was aware you were still here!’ She glanced at him. ‘That’s why I flipped Marcus out of his seat. That sneaky little cretin with his binoculars has been watching our every move since nineteen-ninety four and reporting back to her!’
Lincoln hadn’t thought he could be more shocked-but he was wrong. Marcus was a mermaid? His old boss? His now
employee? ‘That’s insane!’ He exploded, feeling instantly betrayed. ‘I can’t wait to give him a piece of my-’
‘
Lungs?’ Ivyanne interrupted him, placing her fingers against his lips to silence his rant. Her eyes were wide with anxiety. ‘Lincoln you cannot mention this to anyone-especially not to a mer! You’ll be taken out before the next sunset if you do!’
Lincoln sagged and moved her hand away. ‘
Marcus would kill me?’
Ivyanne shrugged. ‘He probably wouldn’t want to do it himself...but....’
Lincoln felt like he was being sucked out with the current all over again only this time, sharks were awaiting him. With a snarl of frustration he got to his feet and swiped at the eucalyptus leaves which fingered his hair from a low hanging branch above. ‘So... what then?! I can’t speak about this, I can’t be with you, and you can’t make me forget any of it? What’s to become of me?’ He glanced over his shoulder. ‘The makeover? The scene at the coffee house? Why would you do such things for someone you were trying to put behind you?!’
‘To make amends any way I could!’ Ivyanne go to her feet. ‘To give you closure! I saw how miserable you were and I couldn’t just leave it that way when I was in the position to make something right.’ She tugged the short white hem of her sundress down. ‘I wanted you to feel good about yourself again, and happy-but at the same time to realize that I was off-limits, which is partially why I started seeing Tristan. I didn’t count on his presence splitting you and Adele apart! And I
certainly didn’t think you’d start investigating me!’
‘Well I did!’ Lincoln exploded. ‘And now I love you
more.’
‘Then I’m sorry for you,’ Ivyanne whispered, her words shooting daggers into his heart. ‘I got you off a sinking ship and onto a lifeboat with a leak, I suppose.’ She held her hands up, a helpless expression on her face. ‘Whether you sink or swim, is now up to
you. But you can’t have me, Lincoln.’ Tears spilled down her cheeks. ‘It breaks my heart but there’s just no way.’
Lincoln felt his temper flare. ‘I know I can’t have you, okay? You can’t turn your back on a thousand years of history to follow your own heart for my sake-I couldn’t even ask for it, now that I know the truth. I’m not
stupid.’ He swooped to her side, taking her arm in his hand. ‘But you stuck around to heal me-so do it! Drown me or shoot me or sick your guard or father onto me-I don’t care.‘
Ivyanne wrenched her arm back. ‘I won’t take your life Lincoln! The pain will go away if you
let it go! Everything you loved about me was an enchantment-now that you know this, you’ll move on to a woman who has earned this level of devotion!’
‘But you
have earned it! You’ve changed my life! How am I ever going to fall for a girl like Adele again when I have you to compare her to? Being drawn together like this makes us soul mates, Ivyanne. I’ll think of you and know you’re thinking of me and the torture of it will-’
‘But I
won’t be thinking of you.’ Ivyanne suddenly said.
Lincoln’s heart shriveled in his chest. After all of her kindness, he hadn’t expected something so insensitive to come out of her perfect mouth. ‘
What? But you just said-’
‘I’d resigned myself to a loveless future-thinking about you for centuries, wanting only what I couldn’t have…. Yes I’ve loved you all of these years, it’s true.’ She whispered, her eyes shining with tears once more. ‘For so long...
nobody could compare.’ She turned her back to him. ‘But I’ve changed. I’m more like Adele than you think. I manipulated you, I lied to you...’ She looked at him over her shoulder, her face contorting with some dark emotion. ‘And now I’ve given myself, and my word- to Tristan.’
‘You’re lying!’ Lincoln exploded. It was as though she’d first dumped a bucket of ice water over his head, then socked him in the stomach. ‘Just last night you said that you were still a v-’
‘Last night, I was.’ Ivyanne cut him off, cringing. ‘But that’s no longer the case.’
Lincoln felt like his heart was being put through a shredder. The purity of their connection had been the one thing holding him together, granting her compassion despite her treachery, but now, he was coming unglued. He recoiled from her, horrified. ‘
Why?!’
Ivyanne looked ill. ‘To get over you. All of these years Link...I’ve been saving myself for you. For a fantasy that will never be more than tears on my pillow, and stolen kisses in a tree fort.’ She hugged herself. ‘To move on from you emotionally, I had to start physically. And so I did. Now...well for all I know, I might be carrying an heir, one that belongs to him.’ She looked him firmly in the eye. ‘Which means that I do as well.’
‘You slept with him?’ Lincoln’s voice was a whisper. His mind was spinning in circles. How could she have given herself to someone else when their kisses from earlier that day, and mere minutes before, was still scalding his lips?
‘I told you... I’m not perfect.’ Ivyanne whispered. ‘We’re
not soul mates Lincoln-if we were, I would have been able to resist him. But I couldn’t.’ She rubbed her temples, looking pained. ‘Denying my natural desires is unravelling me. I just couldn’t take it anymore.’
She was killing him. Lincoln had never been in so much pain. To imagine her, naked with the same men who had rubbed his abilities in his face, who had seduced his own fiancé.... it made Lincoln’s blood boil. ‘You
slept with him.’ He repeated. The words tasted like acid.
‘I did. And that weakness has made my decision for me, Lincoln. Although he’s far from perfect-Tristan has given me what I needed-time, understanding, and hope that I can survive the rest of my life without you.’ He heard her steps retreat on the creaky wooden floor. ‘And I will. Now you have to stop remembering me as the innocent virgin who you gave your heart to-and start seeing me for what I am-a sea witch, who ruined your life and gave nothing in return but pain.’
There was a faint scuttling sound, and then silence.
Lincoln stood there, gripping the rail like it was a life preserver, stung by the knowledge that the girl who had saved him from drowning had come full circle-to knocking every last molecule of oxygen out of his lungs.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered after her. He was hurting so much, he knew he’d never be able to look at her, or remember her, the same way again. He collapsed onto the floor of the decrepit old fort, and began to sob.
31.
Ivyanne had never wept so much before in one night. Three times, she had to stop as her body was wracked with sobs. She leaned against a palm tree on the outer edge of the forest and buried her face in her arms, shoulders heaving, nose running. Her room was only one row of trees away and yet she couldn’t face the idea of leaving the rainforest and facing the rest of the world. She had just defiled her own sanctuary.
‘Ivyanne!’ A voice suddenly said, from not far away. ‘Is that you?’
Ivyanne swatted the tears away from her eyes and regarded the shadowy figure creeping through the trees. ‘Tristan?’ she sniffled. ‘Go away, you shouldn’t see me like this.’
‘No, it’s Bane. Bane Londeree.’
Ivyanne’s stomach hit her shoes. ‘Bane?’ her hand went to her throat as she began to back up, stumbling over exposed and unseen roots. ‘Do not come even one step closer! Whatever you have to say, I don’t want to hear it!’
‘Fine! I’ll stay here...
okay?’ he asked quickly. ‘Stop running though. No neck breaking on my account, please.’
Ivyanne stopped, eyeing his shadow warily. ‘Please go. I’m having a shocking day. I can’t handle even one more-’
‘But I’m not here to ask you to marry me!’ Bane said.
She swallowed, not wanting to believe her ears and get her hopes up. ‘You’re not?’
‘No. Now come out of the bushes please-people are looking for you all over.’
She swallowed again, taking a hesitant step forward, wiping away more tears. ‘What if I don’t
want to be found?’
Bane chuckled. ‘I won’t tell anyone. Now get over here and give me a hug! You sound like you need one.’
Ivyanne rushed forward, throwing her arms around the Hawaiian boy’s neck, a fresh round of sobs escaping from her throat as his comforting arms squeezed her tight.
‘Aloha,’ Bane said softly, holding her tight.
‘Aloha,’ she sniffled, relieved by his sudden presence now that she knew he wasn’t there to put the pressure on. Tristan was cheeky, Ardhi was emotional-but Bane was the joker. All of the Londeree’s were like that-she suspected it was a Hawaiian thing, to be relaxed and jovial most of the time. Probably all of that sunshine. His company had always buoyed her.
‘Okay, get a grip
Wahine,’ Bane said. ‘You’ve been through worse than this.’
She cried harder into his shoulder. ‘But this time, it’s my own fault!’
Bane pulled back, bracing her by the arms, staring into her face intently. ‘Oh boy, you are a mess! I don’t need to call Lindsay Lohan’s damage control people do I?’
‘Wouldn’t help me,’ she sniffled. ‘Please tell me you’re here because you met your soulmate and are relieving me of one less chore?’
He winked at her. ‘No, but I am here to rescind my parents’ invitation.’
It was almost to good to be true. ‘Why?’
He smiled. ‘Ivyanne, you’re an amazing girl...nervous breakdowns, and the fact that the people who promise to marry you drop dead aside-of course-that’s scary....’
She made a face at him, but smiled reluctantly. Only he could make her tragedy seem ironic and funny. ‘Get to the point,’ she warned him.
He poked his tongue out at her. ‘Okay fine; Ku uipo...I’m gay.’
Her jaw dropped. ‘You are?! Since when? Does my mum know?’
‘I fessed up this afternoon over the phone. She was shocked, but not overly devastated. I get the distinct impression that she’s rooting for unca Tristan anyway.’ He grinned. ‘And to answer your first question, I’ve known for awhile.’
She frowned. ‘But you let your parents offer you up anyway?’
He rolled his eyes. ‘I know, I know....tacky.’ He cringed. ‘Sounds awful, but I didn’t want to let my parents down. You see, they know-’
She smirked. ‘And they thought
I’d cure you of it?’
‘Not if they could see you now,’ he said jokingly. ‘But no. The only part that bothers them, is the part where I don’t have babies.’ He smiled easily, letting her arms go. ‘They wanted me to tell you, and cut a bit of a deal. Exchange a child, for freedom.’
‘Wow!’ Ivyanne’s eyebrows shot up. ‘That would have been a tempting deal, two days ago!’ she punched him lightly in the shoulder. ‘Where were you then?’
‘Thinking it over. Eventually, I decided no. I mean, if I want to breed down the line, I’m sure there will be a willing full blood candidate at some point. But it wouldn’t be very progressive of me, to get myself a mer-beard. There isn’t the prejudice against gays in our world that there is in this human one-so why fake a marriage?’
‘It could have helped me out,’ Ivyanne said.
He smiled. ‘You mean,
before you shagged Tristan?’
Ivyanne’s eyes widened. ‘He
told you? That little-’
‘No,’ Bane made a face. ‘Speaking of which....you probably need to find him, and
soon. I was with Ardhi when he found the, boat, with the uh, signs of sexual misconduct ..… and suffice to say, he’s out for blood.’
Ivyanne hadn’t believed that the day could get any worse. If Ardhi knew that she had slept with Tristan-his entire world would have come down around him. He’d be scared and heartbroken....who
knew what he was capable of?
‘This is the worst day of my life,’ Ivyanne whispered.
Bane nodded. ‘I’m getting that-that’s why I headed straight for your room. Look, Ivyanne, I may not want to marry you-but you look like you could use a friend.’
Ivyanne had just been thinking how much she needed the old Ardhi back. Wherever he was at that point, he was probably thinking the same thing. ‘I really could.
Mahalo.’
‘
A'ole pilikia
,’ Bane held out his arm. ‘Let’s go and put this fire out, okay?’
She took it gratefully, suddenly saddened that Bane had withdrawn his proposal. She could have had her cake, and eaten elsewhere. ‘Let’s go.’
⁓
Lincoln arrived back in his room around eight-thirty, thinking that it had been the longest day of his life. All he wanted was a strong drink, a shower, and a sleep. He slammed the door behind him a little harder than necessary, but it didn’t improve his mood.
He threw his phone on his nightstand, then realized he was still clenching Ivyanne’s shell necklace in his fist. He lifted his hand, prepared to smash it into a million fragments against his wall, but changed his mind at the last minute, hanging it on the back of his chair. After all, it was the only piece of her he’d ever possess.
Once the season was over, he fully intended to take an extended vacation before his father officially retired. He didn’t think there was anywhere he could go that wouldn’t remind him of Ivyanne, but he figured a desert of some sort would be perfect. Egypt? Alice Springs? Nowhere that could be reached by water inlet. He should of asked Ivyanne what place on earth was her idea of hell.
What does it matter? He thought, tearing at his scalp angrily as he glanced around his cold and lonely room. I’ll probably just be led astray by some sort of fucking desert sprite or misplaced leprechaun anyway!
Lincoln was done. If he was going to be stuck at The Seaview for the rest of his life, things were going to change. Firstly, he was going to fire every member of the staff with a tattoo, and replace them with regular folk. Hell, maybe he’d even sell up. And if his dad didn’t like it, tough. Lincoln had sacrificed enough of his life to this god-forsaken bay.
Not that any of it was going to help him forget her.
The answering machine light was blinking. Lincoln crossed to it, and hit the button, glaring at his dirt-smeared face, cursing the fact that his outsides suddenly looked so young-if he felt one hundred, he wanted to
look it. It was like being sad on a sunny day-it made you feel worse.
Besides, it had been Ivyanne’s doing. Until the effects of whatever Aubrielle had done wore off, he’d look at his face and know that he’d never be young enough for her, even in his prime.
“HeyLink eets Missa Lee,’ the Japanese chef said quickly. “You better get dow here. There bin some drama.” The message beeped, then the recorded machine said :‘Received, seven thirteen pm.’
Lincoln shrugged, erasing it. The message had been left over an hour before. When he hadn’t shown up, his dad would have been summoned and have handled it. Chase could handle it for the rest of the night, too.
Screw everybody.
But the machine beeped again. “Hey...uh Link, it’s Tristan,” the deep voice suddenly said. Lincoln’s sphincter tightened. “We need to-”
Lincoln hit delete, unable to handle another second of Tristan’s smug voice. He was probably trying to keep him away from Ivyanne anyway-and that was taken care of.
Lincoln turned to go the bathroom, noticing the scrap of paper lying on his bed. He frowned, snatching it up and peering at the scrawled cursive:
Lincoln,
I haven’t stopped crying. I love you honey, and even though Ive made mistakes, I need you to forgive me. I cant go through the rest of my life without you. I understand that your in love with her too, but shes torn between the two of you, and Im cured of him for life. Meet me out at Needle Island, my love, away from all of those who have come in between us, and let me start making it up to you. If you don’t come, I have no reason to live.
Always, Adele.
Lincoln let the piece of paper drift back to the bed, heart hammering. If she thought for a second that he could forgive her, she was insane. He’d already told her that. Besides, what on earth was she thinking, luring him to Needle Island? It wasn’t far off the coast, twenty minutes by boat in fact-but she knew he was terrified of boats! Was it some sort of test?
Lincoln groaned, cursing her internally-of course he
had to go. He couldn’t let her kill herself over him. Adele was an intense girl, after all. Who knew how dark her heart was at that time? Besides, part of it was Lincoln’s own fault. Adele never had the chance to win his whole heart, because he’d been saving it for someone who really didn’t deserve him anyway.
Lincoln picked up his cell phone off the bed and stuffed it in his pocket. He left the note where he found it, figuring that if he died, at least his dad would know why he had headed out into the dark night in the first place.
Besides, so what if he died? He was already in hell....heaven would be a step up.
⁓
‘What happened to your face?’ Ivyanne asked, the second she spotted Tristan, running into his arms. Her warm hand felt soothing against the light graze.
Tristan scooped her up and squeezed her. ‘Your bestest buddy happened to it, that’s what.’ He spotted his nephew over Ivyanne’s shoulder. ‘Aloha
Malihini!’
‘Aloha
Paniolo!’ Bane lifted his hand in a salute. ‘Looks like you’ve been having fun!’
‘An adventure unlike any other.’ Tristan smiled. ‘Decided to step up finally, huh?’
Ivyanne pulled back, grinning up at Tristan. ‘Actually, he just came out. One down! One to go!’
Tristan laughed at the delight and relief in her eyes, before glancing back at his nephew. ‘Actually, that’s what
I meant.’
Bane lifted an eyebrow. ‘You
knew?’
‘That you’re
mahu?’ Tristan rolled his eyes. ‘I’m sorry, did you think you were hiding it well?’
Ivyanne stabbed him in the ribs with her fingers. ‘
I didn’t!’
‘That’s because you haven’t seen his wardrobe,’ Tristan said, winking at Bane. ‘For someone who spends most of his time swimming, he’s got an awful lot of Dolce and Gabbana suits in there. He didn’t so much come out of the closet, as the closet came out of
him!’
Bane threw back his head and laughed. ‘Oh designer threads
will be my undoing!’
Ivyanne stepped out of Tristan's arms. ‘Why didn’t you tell me?’ she demanded. ‘It would have helped me sleep at night!’
‘It wasn’t my place,’ Tristan said honestly. ‘Besides, risk Ardhi finding out that his odds were fifty to one instead of thirty to one? Not on your life!’ He took Ivyanne’s hand. ‘Now reunions aside, we have some serious shit to deal with. Ardhi knows somehow-’
‘He found your boat,’ Bane interjected. ‘And the state the bedroom was in sort of tipped him off.’
‘Oh.’ Tristan glanced at Ivyanne, who blushed and looked at her feet, shaking her head. ‘Well, that’ll do it! Anyway.... he’s lost it. He showed up in the bar and threw my table across the room-in front of dozens of people. No one’s blaming me, and it’s all cleaned up now, but he’s in trouble. And he’s not the only one.’
‘Lincoln?’ Ivyanne asked, paling considerably under the muted light as Tristan led them back to the staff quarters, thinking of Ardhi’s tirade the day before.
‘Yes. Beats me as to why, but Ardhi seems to be in a crush now, talk it out later kind of mood.’ Tristan squeezed her hand. ‘I called and left a message, but I don’t know if Link’s gotten it yet. Have you seen him?’
She ducked her head, momentarily blocking his view of her pretty profile. ‘Yes.’ She whispered.
‘Did you handle it?’