The Next Door Boys (35 page)

“Let's figure out who won,” I said, needing something from my regular temple routine.

“What?” The corner of his mouth pulled up.

“It's this thing Jaron and I always do. What was the birth year of the person you came through for?”

“1792.”

I smiled. “You win. Mine was 1865.”

Brian laughed quietly. “You two always do this?”

I nodded. “Always.” I paused for a moment. “You okay?”

“A little more distracted today than I'd like,” he whispered back.

“Me too. But coming here always helps a little.” I wondered what had Brian so distracted. Things seemed to be going well for him. Maybe he had issues with his ex-wife I wasn't aware of or maybe he was thinking of the house he was about to buy. The house I lived in.

He nodded.

“Can I be totally selfish and ask you another favor?” At that point, I simply hoped he didn't think I was crazy.

“You've already dragged me in here, what else could you possibly want?” I saw a corner of his mouth pull up.

“A shoulder? I'm used to having a big brother here. I just need you for a sec.” I couldn't breathe waiting for his response.

He patted his shoulder. I closed my eyes and lay my head against him. It wasn't the same as having Jaron there, but it was close. Brian felt different in a way that I couldn't put my finger on. I liked it. Everybody needed more than one person to lean on. I set my hands in my lap, and Brian reached out and put one of his hands over mine.

Poor guy, he was trying hard to help me out. I didn't want to move, but I couldn't sit there all day, my head resting on Brian, especially with Nathan waiting at home.

“Thank you, Brian.” I whispered as I stood up. “I owe you huge. I'm kinda pathetic, huh?”

He shook his head and looked like he was about to say something but stopped and smiled instead.

“You okay?”

He seemed more melancholy than I'd ever seen him.

“We'll talk later.” He stood up and started toward the exit.

“Wait.” I got up to stand with him. “Let's just grab burgers or something with Nathan. You can talk then.” I knew he had more to say.

“Yeah, that'd be nice.”

I'd do just about anything to wipe that look off his face.

I flipped another page in my English text. Our backyard was a delightful spot to study. Brian, Nathan, and I were headed to dinner later in the evening for burgers and talking. The sun burned hot on my legs, and I sat there very thankful for the heat, shorts, and my love of reading.

Stuart and Brian pulled up in Brian's car. I set my book on my lap, anticipating them coming to say hello.

Brian answered his phone as he stepped out of the car.

“Hello…? Amanda, hi… You're where…? What happened?” He rubbed his forehead with his free hand. He sat on the hood, his face in blank shock as he stared at the ground. He was silent. Amanda must've have had a lot to say.

I knew I shouldn't listen in, but I had to. I'd never heard him talk to her aside from the few phrases I overheard at my parents’ house. “Your mom won't throw a fit…? Amanda, I don't know what to say… Yeah, he's doing great—more than great… I promise to get him down to see you soon…” There was another long break. Brian still hadn't moved. Stuart stood close, a look of concern on his face. “No, it doesn't matter where you are. He needs to see his mom.” Brian kicked his foot in the dirt. “Okay, thanks for the call. I promise to be in touch… Okay, bye.” He stared at his phone.

I suddenly felt like I should hide. Whatever they'd just talked about was personal. I knew that much. And it had affected Brian in a way I'd never seen. I slid down in my chair.

“Brian?” Stuart asked. He put his hand on Brian's shoulder.

“That was Amanda.” His voice came out in a hoarse whisper.

“What's going on?”

“She's apparently been smuggling drugs or pills or something over the Mexican border. It seems completely unreal. I mean, I know it happens… It's why she's been so hard to reach. She was arrested yesterday. She doesn't want Nathan with her mother. She'd, um… rather have him with me.”

“You okay?” Stuart asked.

“Uh… I don't know.” Brian started toward his apartment door. Stuart followed.

I could just hear them under the porch.

“Brian?” I heard Stuart say.

“I can't help but feel a little responsible. I really messed up her life, and I didn't mean to.” Brian leaned his back against his door. He glanced up, and our eyes caught.

I immediately looked back down. I felt horrible for listening and even worse because of the look on Brian's face.

“Brian, people make their own choices.”

“And people send other people over the edge.” Brian's voice was hard with something I couldn't place. Anger? Sadness? Frustration? Probably a combination. Stuart walked back up the stairs.

“Dad?” Nathan came out of the Rileys’ house.

“Nope. Just me. Your dad is busy for a little longer. Mind hanging out with me?” Stuart asked.

I wanted Nathan. I wanted to sit with him and watch cartoons and enjoy the last few minutes before he knew his mom was in jail and he wouldn't get to stay with her anymore. My heart hurt for him, for Brian, and I felt like there was nothing I could do.

thirty-three

I heard a quiet knock on my door. It must be Nathan. It seemed that I was his Tuesday person. We'd never sat down with a schedule to figure out how we'd all help, but Nathan was always with me on Tuesday.

“Hey buddy.” I smiled down as I opened the door.

“Thanks, Leigh.” Brian turned and started up my steps, probably before he even got to the bottom. “I really appreciate it.” He looked down toward me when he reached the top but didn't make eye contact. I hated seeing him so sad and distracted. He hadn't looked straight at me since the call from his wife.

“Happy to.” I waved, but he was almost to his car and probably didn't hear.

“What is all this?” Nathan looked around my living room.

I turned and shut the door. My patterns, wedding dress bits, and bridesmaids dress materials were everywhere—on the floor, on the chairs, over the arm of the couch… I could see the order in the chaos, but probably nobody else could.

“I'm sewing for Jaron's wedding. Remember Jaron's getting married?” I walked in and took the dress pattern pieces off the couch, giving us somewhere to sit.

“I know.” He widened his eyes and let his shoulder slump down. For being five, he had a great look of exasperation.

I looked over at the flowery material Megan had picked for her bridesmaids. I was doing three identical dresses, all similar to the one I'd made Megan for the masquerade. I was thrilled to be in the wedding party, not so thrilled about the dress.

“Are you okay, Leigh?” Nathan sat on the couch and pulled his pack onto his lap.

“I'm fine. Just thinking.” I laughed a little. “Should we go play outside since it's so nice out?”

“You should change out of your pajamas first.” Nathan pointed to my legs and giggled. It was apparently silly that I still had them on.

“Wait right there.” I walked into my room and pulled on a yellow T-shirt and one of my favorite white full skirts—one that swished around my knees.

When I came out, Nathan was in the middle of a cartoon.

“Since when do you know how to turn on the TV?” I asked.

“Since Jaron showed me.” He lifted my remote and switched the channel in a show of his newfound skill.

“I see.” I sat next to him on the couch to watch cartoons. Outside could wait. I looked around at the mess of dresses. That would have to wait too. When Nathan was with me, I liked to just be with Nathan. He had the warmth of his dad but the sweet spirit of a child. It pulled on the maternal side of me as well, and I enjoyed being part of his life. I loved being someone that Nathan wanted to see, wanted to spend time with.

“I want to do something, Leigh.” Nathan switched off the TV and looked at me. We'd watched two episodes of Dora and one of Phineas and Ferb. Definitely time to do something different.

“What would you like to do?” I sat up a little and rubbed my eyes a few times. Sitting on the couch with a warm body put me right to sleep, or a state close to it.

“Go for an adventure walk?” He grinned.

I narrowed my eyes and tapped my finger on my chin, as if I had to really think about it. “Adventure walk it is.” I let myself smile at him then. “What's an adventure walk?”

“I'll show you!” He leapt off the couch and dashed out my door. He moved fast and easy, like his dad. I followed him outside.

Brian pulled up, and Nathan's body went slack. He hadn't been gone long, or the time just passed quickly. Three shows—maybe an hour and a half?

“What's the matter?” I asked Nathan.

“Can we still go for a walk? Even though my daddy's home?” He stared up at me with his large brown eyes. Even without the extra effort, I would have said yes.

“Why don't we invite him with us?” I offered. Maybe I'd finally get Brian to smile or talk.

“Daddy!” Nathan waved as Brian climbed out.

“What's up, little man?”

“Come with us on an adventure walk!” Nathan ran and threw his arms around Brian's waist.

“Only if Leigh doesn't mind.” He reached a hand out and scuffed up Nathan's hair. I felt like he looked everywhere but at me. What was going on?

“Of course I don't mind.” Why would I mind? It didn't make any sense.

“It's a short walk. We just walk around in a big circle, around the block,” Brian explained.

“Sounds perfect.” As soon as his eyes met mine, I smiled at him, hoping he'd relax.

“Leigh, I'm sorry about dinner, I…”

“I overheard your conversation with her over the phone. Don't apologize. We can do that anytime.” I didn't want that silly thing to be keeping him from talking with me.

Brian stepped in next to me as we started up the sidewalk. I already felt better.

Nathan immediately walked out ahead, jumping over cracks and using his imaginary sword, swinging it wildly from side to side to protect us.

“You like skirts.” Brian looked down at my legs.

“You're just now noticing?” I glanced down as well.

“No… I don't know.” He put his hands in his pockets and looked almost embarrassed.

“They're fun to walk in, see?” I took a few steps, dramatically swinging my hips to feel the skirt move around my knees. I took Brian's hand out of his pocket, raised it above my head and twirled once. “And because as grown up as I think I am, I still love to twirl like I did when I was a little girl.” I held our hands above my head for a moment before twirling again. I stopped, facing him, and let his hand go. Brian was easy. He was easy to talk to, easy to be around. I had that thought often. Even with his recent grumpy state, I liked being with him.

“Good to know.” His face looked wistful, almost sad, but a little better than it had.

I let my gaze rest on him for a moment. I wanted him to know that I missed talking to him, that I missed just hanging out. “When it's hot like this, it's the only thing that keeps me cool.” I took a few more swinging steps that accentuated the movement of my skirt. “You should try it.”

“Yeah. I'll get right on that.” Neither of us spoke for a moment. He reached out and touched my shoulder. “You look good, Leigh. Healthy, rested… I'm sorry, I'm sure you're sick of comments about your health.”

“It's fine. I haven't talked with you in so long.” I bumped my shoulder against his.

Nathan leapt over cracks and darted around the trees lining the sidewalk. We were not at all needed in his game of pretend. Brian didn't make a move to say anything. I guessed he wasn't ready to talk. He watched his feet on the ground.

“I took your advice,” I said.

“What?” I'd taken him out of his train of thought. His head snapped up to look at me. His brown eyes were so much like Nathan's. Or, I guess Nathan's eyes were so much like his dad's. They held a kindness that went deep. I wondered how many people recognized that about him.

“About anxiety.” It felt okay telling Brian. He was the one who suggested it because it had helped him. “Dr. Watts gave me the lowest dose they have, and I take half of one pill every day. I don't forget to eat, which means my wardrobe has changed.” I let a little sigh out at that thought. I did miss my skinny girl clothes. I'd only gone up a little in size, but I'd gotten used to the rail-thin frame I'd had for over a year. “I sleep all night, and I feel good. It's been a long time since I've felt healthy.”