The Other Side of Envy: The Ghost Bird Series: #8 (The Academy) (16 page)

“We still worked when we didn’t have school like this,” Victor said.

“That’s different,” Gabriel said. “We didn’t have to be somewhere exactly at a certain time every morning, when everyone else is getting up and going to work. Like people need to be at places at the same time for some reason.”

Victor smiled and shook his head, glancing at me.

I shrugged and smiled back. I couldn’t blame Gabriel for complaining. I wasn’t looking forward to going to school tomorrow either.

I changed into one of Silas’s baseball shirts. The boys put on pajama pants and T-shirts.

I was the first to crawl into bed and while I tried to wait on them, my eyes were closing on their own.

I slept heavily, and at the same time, I sensed them crawling into bed. Their scents mixed, so I couldn’t tell who was on the right or left. My legs knocked into someone. I rolled over and slept again.

Sometime while it was still dark out, a phone rang. I wanted to wake up, but my body wouldn’t move. Victor spoke, his voice husky from sleep. “Gabriel. It’s Kota.”

Curses flew from Gabriel’s mouth. “Tell him I left my phone at my house, I know. I’ll grab it tomorrow morning on our way to school. I’ve got to stop by anyway for my books—”

“No, not that,” Victor said, talking in a hushed tone like he didn’t want to wake me. “Mr. McCoy is scouting out the neighborhood here. He wants you to take my car and drive around the city a couple of times and head to his house.”

I was awake now, but remained still, pretending to be asleep. I wasn’t super worried about Mr. McCoy invading Victor’s house, especially with Victor and Gabriel right there. Also, someone in the Academy was following McCoy everywhere, plus Victor’s security team on patrol, so we were safe in the house. Why did we have to leave just because he was here?

“You do it.”

“Can I do it?” Victor asked to I assumed Kota. There was a long pause. “He said he wants you to take my car. It should be odd enough that you’re taking off so early in my car to make him curious. If he’s not following you, I’m to drive off in another car. If he stays here, Dr. Green is going to pick up Sang. He wants to know who he’s after.”

Gabriel groaned and the blankets shifted. I flopped over, still pretending to be asleep so I wouldn’t get pulled into a car with anyone. They really needed to follow us this early in the morning? Was watching us sleep interesting?

Victor got up, too, and whispered. “Sorry, Gabriel” he said. He shuffled, moving around the room. “Really, next time we get a chance, let’s take Sang to the spa. She likes it. We should take a day off.”

“Yeah, she likes it,” Gabriel grumbled low. “Of course she likes it. You pay enough for it.”

I tilted my head slightly, my eyes fluttering just enough to see without fully opening them. My breathing and heart stopped as I strained to listen.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Victor asked.

Slowly, I tilted my head to try to see what was going on. Gabriel pulled clothes out of the closet, and stepped into a pair of jeans. “Nothing.”

Victor walked over to stand in the doorway of the closet. “Really, is something wrong? I thought you liked the spa? Did she say something? Was she uncomfortable for some reason?”

“You can’t keep throwing money at her,” Gabriel said, standing up fully. He held his shirt in his hand, balled in his fist as he used it to point at Victor. “I can’t keep up with that.”

I swallowed, my heart pounding in my chest.

Victor looked back my way, and then at Gabriel. “Let’s go out into the hall.”

I held my breath. Gabriel finished putting his shirt on and then grabbed a pair of shoes and followed Victor out. Victor pulled the door behind them, but left it open a sliver.

I sat up and creeped toward the door to hear. I was dying to know. I couldn’t help it. Gabriel was upset and lashing out at Victor. Did I do something wrong?

“Is everything okay with you?” Victor asked. His baritone carried through the crack in the door to me.

“I can’t compete with this,” Gabriel said, grumbling. “You’re already smart and play music, isn’t that enough? Do you have to throw money every time you want to make her happy?”

I eased myself over to the piano bench, curling up on it and sitting carefully to not make a sound. I hunkered down, like the piano could hide me.

Victor made a few sounds. “What are you talking about?”

“Luke and I brought her to see this other Academy group,” Gabriel said. “A team with four dogs and one bird.”

Dogs? I realized he meant Lily and her team, but I hadn’t realized there were terms that separated boys and girls. I was a bird? Or just members of the teams were considered birds so Lily was a bird?

“Really?” Victor asked, sounding more enthusiastic. “You found them? North said he had talked to them but I wasn’t sure if I could or if it would...”

“He told you?” Gabriel asked. “North did?”

“Yeah,” Victor said. “Mr. Blackbourne knows. North and Mr. Blackbourne went first. They talked to me later...”

The revelation shook me. Silence stretched between the boys. I imagined Gabriel was as shocked as I was to learn Mr. Blackbourne and Victor had known about this. Mr. Blackbourne went first…he knew from the beginning?

He hadn’t told me?

There were footsteps, shuffling, like Gabriel was walking away, but then he came back. “This is bullshit. They knew and didn’t tell us?”

“They were waiting to tell everyone,” Victor said. “How did you find them?”

“Luke,” Gabriel said. “Said he overheard North talking to them on the phone. No one ever told us? And Sang? You all were fucking around behind her back like that?”

“We’re not. It’s just...hard to accept. And Mr. Blackbourne didn’t want to tell others until he was sure you all were ready for it.”

“So he just didn’t tell us? I thought we told each other everything.” Gabriel made a noise, a grumble. “Look, I’ve got to go save her ass again.”

“I’ll look out for her,” Victor said.

“You know,” Gabriel said loudly, and then quieted as he went on. “I thought today maybe I had a chance, but you should see her face when you show up, or when you talk about your music, or offer to do things for her. And to top it all off, you’re spending money on her to take her to the spa. To places I can’t afford to take her. It’s bad enough a guy like me has to work to get her attention at all.”

“You’re crazy,” Victor said. “You’re full of talent. She adores you.”

“I’m the poor dog from the wrong side of the tracks who’s got nothing to offer her except...well...a drawing, a song or a bottle of perfume. Fuck me, that’s shit. You play for her at concert halls. You could smuggle her to Paris for the weekend in a snap. The others are smarter or stronger.” He grunted and then there were more footsteps walking away down the hallway.

“You’re wrong, Gabriel,” Victor called, still by the bedroom door. The footsteps stilled. “You’ve got more talent than the rest of us put together.”

“Not enough of the right talents. Not shit that makes her eyes light up just by talking about it.” Gabriel said and moved down the stairs, his footsteps fading away.

“Hang on,” Victor said, following to the stairs and down, when I couldn’t hear any more.

My heart was in my throat, too afraid to beat and have Gabriel hear. The center of my body shook, like when you’re way too tired to sleep but can’t, rattling my bones where I sat.

My eyes drifted down to the piano keys. They were a blur, and the more I thought about what Gabriel had said, the more they blurred behind tears. This was worse than them getting into a jealous fight over who I kissed. I never knew Gabriel to be envious of anyone, let alone Victor and the others. Victor was right, while the others were talented, Gabriel was very much just as talented, if not more. Just in his own ways.

He was Gabriel. How could he not see that? I didn’t care about going to the spa. I did it for Victor the first time. I wanted to go again, with Victor and with any of them that wanted to. As long as they enjoyed it. Not because of the cost, but just to spend time with them.

I messed things up somehow. If I smiled at one a little more, they squabbled. The dream of what Lily had, of her and her guys living in that house together, now seemed like a fantasy. I couldn’t picture it for myself the way I had before.

It couldn’t happen. They already fight now and they’re living apart. This fight was about me. There’d be more. I wasn’t sure how to help. I couldn’t smile at Victor without Gabriel getting jealous. How many other small things did I do that would make the others fight like that? No wonder North had kept this to himself. Maybe he was curious about Lily and her idea, but maybe he knew that it wouldn’t work. So he kept it to himself instead of dropping the idea into our heads, raising our hopes, but also changing how we’d been thinking.

I pressed my face to my knees, curling up tighter on the bench, simply trying to hold myself together. The other alternative was scarier than seeing them fight. How else could we stay together? Or maybe it wasn’t possible. Maybe I needed to separate myself so they wouldn’t fight. Could I ever?

Something Lily mentioned to me came back: that I’d have to make a choice, and the Academy would encourage me to try other teams. I could see why the Academy would make such requests. The complicated road I faced now was daunting, and I feared in the end more hearts would be broken than saved. If the guys quarreled over simple things, there was no way they could stick together as a team. I was derailing their lives, their goals.

A calm hand on my back jolted me, making my head snap up.

Victor stood beside me. His wavy hair hung over his eyes, the fire in them simmering low. “Are you okay?” he asked in a hushed whisper.

I swallowed and nodded. He’d walked so quietly, or I’d been so absorbed in my own downward spiral of thoughts that I hadn’t heard him come in.

He sat down next to me, facing the piano. His fingers smoothed over the keys, but he never pressed on them. “Did we wake you?”

I thought of lying, but I couldn’t do it. I nodded, quietly, slowly. I kept my eyes on his long, lean fingers.

Silence fell between us. Slowly, as if unable to stop himself, Victor started to play. He played quietly, as quietly as one could play a piano. It was a gentle tune, one I wasn’t familiar with, but it reminded me of sunlight, meadows and fresh air.

“Gabriel mentioned you went to see another Academy group today,” Victor said.

There was a pause and I expected him to say more, but then realized he was more asking than he was talking.

“Yes,” I said, unsure where to begin, but I had questions for him, too. “You knew about them?”

“Only through North and Mr. Blackbourne telling me about them,” he said. His hands glided over the keys, light, soft. If anyone was sleeping in the house, it would put them into a deeper sleep; the lure of a lullaby.

“What did they tell you?” I asked quietly.

“What did you discover there?” he asked at nearly the same time.

I picked my head up, reflexively smiling that we’d spoken together.

He laughed, the fire in his eyes sparking. “Mr. Blackbourne intended to talk to you about it eventually. I think he was more concerned you’d be frightened.”

I didn’t have an answer for him. I was more frightened of hurting Gabriel’s feelings at this point. He was out there somewhere now, trying to protect me and Victor by luring Mr. McCoy away.

“What did you find out?” Victor asked. The song he played became even softer.

“I found Lily,” I said, unsure where to start.

“The girl?” he asked. “I didn’t know her name.”

“I talked to her,” I said. “I even got her phone number.”

“That’s nice of her to talk with you,” he said. He started swaying slightly as he played the music.

I sat with my knees close to my chest, watching his fingers drift over the keys, barely pressing to make the sounds. “She said I should talk to her about... everything.”

“I want to tell you to go ahead, but I’ve never met her.” He reached over in front of where I was sitting, playing a few keys close to me. “Mr. Blackbourne and North have. You could ask them...if you want to know if they’re okay to talk to. I can’t see a reason why they’d say no, though. They’re the ones helping us out.”

“Helping us to stay together?” I asked. “Somehow?” I knew. I just wanted confirmation from him that we were on the same page.

“Is that what you want?” he asked quietly.

I didn’t have an answer for him. I was scared. If I told him I did, would it hurt his feelings? Gabriel’s reactions had me second-guessing everything I said and did.

There were many more considerations than I had originally pictured after Lily showed me what was possible.

“What do
you
want?” I asked quietly.

His playing slowed considerably, and some notes took so long for him to press, that it seemed he’d stopped completely.

His eyes, however, lit up into a tender flame, breathing, alive, but frail somehow.

Suddenly, he stood up, the keys stilled without him playing. He paced the floor behind the piano bench. His fingers twisted into his brown, wavy hair, tugging. “It’s horrible, Sang,” he said. “The plan, I want to. I mean, I would rather do that. Really. When it boils down, I want what Mr. Blackbourne is suggesting. It’s not my gut reaction when I think of it, though. My first instinct, every time, is to ask you to come with me. Just me.”

“Where?” I asked quietly.

His hands reached out to me, open, palms up. “Anywhere,” he said, his tone desperate. “France, Italy... Everywhere. Anywhere you wanted.” He slowly pulled his arms in, until he’d folded them over his stomach. “I tell myself it’s how I’d get you away from this crazy life. Like McCoy. Or your parents. Only that’s not completely true.”

I waited quietly, my heart beating so loud in my ears, I was sure he heard it, too. I pulled my arms in slightly, inside the big shirt of Silas’s, to warm myself in it. I clenched my jaw to keep myself from saying anything to stop him.

“I’m no better than Gabriel,” he said, remaining still now, standing over me with his arms crossed. “I secretly think if I pull you away from the rest of the group, that somehow...it’ll change how you feel about me. That maybe you’d like me better.”