The Sheriff Wears Pants (8 page)

* * * * *

Editorial April 20, 1871

I decided to print the paper a day early in order to urge every man to do his duty and vote for the woman he feels best for the job of Sheriff.  Yes, I said woman.  I am supporting Miss Darcy Hamilton in the race for Sheriff of Cactus Hill and the surrounding area.  She saved my life, and she saved Mr. Goode, and two other ladies who happened to be shopping in the store at the time of the robbery.  It isn’t often we find a lady with so much courage, but instead of fainting dead away when there was a gun pointed at me, she swept up the other outlaw’s weapon and shot without hesitation.  She disabled the would-be killer and saved my life, for which I am grateful.  I do not dislike the present Sheriff, but I think it is time for a change.  Miss Hamilton will make a diligent Sheriff, and I hope you will vote for her in tomorrow’s election.

* * * * *

“Don’t let it upset you, Miss Eleanor,” Will said as he looked over Waldo’s latest editorial.  He
should
have run him out of town when he first arrived! The little man needed a swift kick where it would do some good!  He didn’t mention one word about Darcy taking her name off of the ballot, and he encouraged everyone to vote for Darcy in spite of how she felt on the subject.  He was going to use the scrawny reporter for target practice if Darcy was elected!

“Waldo knows I do
not
wish to be elected!” Darcy exclaimed after she read the editorial.  “How
dare
he campaign for me in this manner?  I am going to punch him in the nose again!” she threatened, and Will could sense that she was serious.  Her green eyes were flashing with temper and her tiny hands were balled into fists.  He wasn’t sure that he wouldn’t have to protect Waldo from her, but if she were the Sheriff, she would be the one to have to protect Waldo!  That thought almost made Will grin as he pictured himself doing some personal damage to the man!

But personal feelings aside, Will said in a calming tone of voice, “Honey, I honestly think the best thing you can do right now is ignore Waldo.  He rubs folks the wrong way with his weekly editorials.  I think most of the men in town will do just the opposite of what Waldo wants.  They think him a pompous fool!”

“But what if I actually get elected?” she asked, doubt reflected in her pretty eyes.

“You will refuse to accept the position,” Will calmly stated.

“But, if I am elected by the people, how can I refuse?” she asked. If they put their trust in her, how could she let them down? It was an obligation, and she would need to think about it before she could refuse.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                 
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     
                                                                                                                                                                                                  

“It is simple, you just say no to the Mayor.  He knows you wanted your name off the ballot, so it shouldn’t come as a surprise when you tell him you refuse to accept the title.”

“I know that would make
you
happy, Will, but I don’t think I could do such a thing.”  If she was actually elected
after
she made it clear she wasn’t running, then it was because the people in town thought she would make a better sheriff than Will.  It would be an obligation she couldn’t refuse, even though the thought of taking over Will’s job made her feel ill.  It wasn’t what she wanted.

“Oh, please!  Don’t you two start off this day by arguing.  We’ll see what the election results are before we discuss all of this nonsense.” Eleanor put her foot down. She didn’t want them arguing until there was a reason to argue, although she strongly agreed with Will.  Eleanor promised herself that she would talk firmly with Darshana if she had to in order to dissuade her from wearing a badge!  It was not a safe job for a woman, especially a woman like Darshana, who was gently raised!  As for Waldo Phares, she was tempted to buy her own newspaper and put him out of business so fast his head would spin!  If Darshana were elected due to his interference, she would do it just to watch him squirm.

“You’re right, Gram.  There is no reason to fuss over something that likely won’t happen.” Darcy felt like kicking herself for upsetting the elderly woman.  Since that episode the other day, Gram’s color was not good, and Darcy was afraid for her.  Doc had warned her that Eleanor had very little time left, but Darcy hadn’t wanted to hear it then, and she still didn’t!  But, even to her untrained eyes, her grandmother was failing.  Darcy wanted to make these last days of Gram’s life as wonderful as possible.

“I’m sorry, Miss Eleanor.  There are better topics to discuss over breakfast.” Will could see that the elderly woman was not well, and he mentally kicked himself for discussing a problem that might not exist.

“Yes! Is it true that Molly Pearson ran off with Gordon Francis?” Eleanor asked, her green eyes twinkling merrily.  Miss Eleanor loved to gossip when it was true.

“Jeb Pearson is furious!” Will was only too willing to gossip if it entertained Miss Eleanor.  “He lost his free labor to Gordon, and he practically ordered me to go after them and bring his girl back.  I reminded him that Molly is of legal age and he can’t force her to come home unless she wants to.  He cussed me out and said he was going after her himself.  I reminded him that he could be arrested if he kidnapped her.  He didn’t like that and accused me of siding with Gordon.  I have to admit that I am tickled for Molly and Gordon.  They are in love, and the only reason Jeb wants Molly to come home is because he can work her like a horse and pay her nothing.  He is miserly with his money, and now he is going to have to hire two people to make up for losing Molly.”

Eleanor clapped her hands.  “Oh, how wonderful!  When my friends come by today, I will have the latest to share!  It’s usually the other way around!”  It was easy to see the elderly woman was delighted, and Darcy and Will laughed along with her.

Darcy enjoyed breakfast.  It felt natural to have Will at the table again, and she could see that Gram was delighted.  The only thing bothering her was the election. She would be mortified if she were elected.  It was the last thing on earth she wanted right now.  Hopefully, that wouldn’t happen and she was worrying for nothing.  At least, once the election was over, they would never have to hear about it again! 

If Waldo Phares would have kept his nose out of it, the day would have passed by unnoticed by many and Darcy wouldn’t have this nagging feeling of impending doom in her stomach!

* * * * *

It was the Mayor’s job to count the ballots. He started by counting the ballots for and against spending money to improve the schoolhouse.  It passed by ten votes.  Then there was the election for town council. Since there was only one candidate, he was sure to be elected, but the Mayor had to go through the ballots one by one just in case there was a write in campaign of some sort.  There wasn’t.  People liked Herb Richards. 

The last set of ballots to count were the ones for Sheriff.  The Mayor was shocked when he opened ten ballots before he got one vote for the present Sheriff!  The men in town overwhelmingly elected Darcy Hamilton to be their new Sheriff.  The Mayor didn’t look forward to delivering the news to either of the hotheaded people.  He put his hat on his head and grimly walked over to the Sheriff’s office.

“Mayor!”  Will expected to hear that he was reelected as Sheriff, but instead he was told he was no longer employed as the Sheriff of Cactus Hill.  Darcy stomped him in the polls!  It was humiliating.  “Darcy told you that she didn’t want to run, Mayor.  She is going to refuse to take the job.”

“If she does that, then, of course we will be happy to have you as our Sheriff.  Frankly, I think the men in this town voted for Miss Darcy just to keep their wives from kicking them out of bed.  I think a good hairbrush would have ended that nonsense, but a lot of men are wimps when it comes to their wives.  They believe in the philosophy of ‘Happy wife, happy life!’  I believe in that up to a point, but I don’t think any of them considered what is going to happen when word gets out that Cactus Hill has a little girl for a Sheriff.”

“The town will be in trouble.  Even worse, my fiancée will be in serious trouble.  What if some angry drunk takes a swing at her?”  Will growled.  “She is going to refuse to take the job, Mayor.  She has to for her own sake.”

“A lot of people will be disappointed, meaning the women in town will throw a fit.  I might have to go and see Barney at the General Store and buy a case of hairbrushes to hand out to the men!” It was the Mayor’s turn to growl.  “Sometimes I hate this job, Will.”

“I understand, Mayor.”

“I’ll be back to tell you what Miss Darcy has to say.”

Will nodded, positive his fiancée would do as he suggested earlier that day.  Miss Eleanor would insist Darcy be reasonable.  If not, he could always do as the Mayor suggested and put the cute little redhead over his knee and redden her pretty bottom.

* * * * *

Malachi rode into Cactus Hill, his hat pulled low over his eyes, hiding his scarred face as much as possible. He couldn’t get caught until he made that bitch, Carlotta, pay.  She turned him in, testified against him, and sent him to prison for eight years of his life.  Worst of all, she divorced him while he was locked in that hellhole.  He told her that he would kill her if she ever left him, and he meant it. 

But first, he was going to make her pay for turning him in and for all the beatings he suffered at the hands of the guards.  All of it was her fault, and he might have forgiven her if she hadn’t divorced him!  Now she would pay… once he found her.

It took him two days to beat the truth out of the Doctor and his wife that Carlotta worked for until he was released from prison.  When she heard he was out, she ran.  The couple knew where she went, and the name she was using.  The old Doctor was stubborn, and refused to talk… until Malachi started beating his wife.  Then he talked, begging to be released from the ropes binding him to a chair so that he could tend his wife.  Malachi took out a knife and slit the woman’s throat, and then he did the same to the doctor.  They helped Carlotta deceive him and they had to pay, too.