The Skeptics Annotated Bible (36 page)

24 And when her days to be delivered were fulfilled, behold, there were twins in her womb.

25 And the first came out red, all over like an hairy garment; and they called his name Esau.

26 And after that came his brother out, and his hand took hold on Esau’s heel; and his name was called Jacob: and Isaac was threescore years old when she bare them.

27 And the boys grew: and Esau was a cunning hunter, a man of the field; and Jacob was a plain man, dwelling in tents.

28 And Isaac loved Esau, because he did eat of his venison: but
Rebekah loved Jacob.

(25.28)
“Rebekah loved Jacob.”
Isaac loved Esau because Esau was a hunter and Isaac loved venison. Rebekah loved Jacob, but God hated Esau (see Rom 9.13). No reason is given for why one son is loved while the other is hated. But since God chose to act this way, it must have been as an example for parents to follow. Have you decided which of your children to hate?

29 And Jacob sod pottage: and Esau came from the field, and he was faint:

30 And Esau said to Jacob, Feed me, I pray thee, with that same red pottage; for I am faint: therefore was his name called Edom.

31 And Jacob said, Sell me this day thy birthright.

32 And Esau said, Behold, I am at the point to die: and what profit shall this birthright do to me?

33 And Jacob said, Swear to me this day; and he sware unto him: and
he sold his birthright unto Jacob.

(25.33)
“He sold his birthright unto Jacob.”
Esau sold his birthright to Jacob for a bit of bread and a bowl of lentil soup.

34 Then Jacob gave Esau bread and pottage of lentiles; and he did eat and drink, and rose up, and went his way: thus Esau despised his birthright.

26
And there was a famine in the land, beside the first famine that was in the days of Abraham. And Isaac went unto Abimelech
king of the Philistines
unto Gerar.

(26.1)
“King of the Philistines”
Isaac visits the king of the Philistines “in the days of Abraham,” yet the Philistines didn’t live in the region until around 1200 BCE (800 years after “the days of Abraham”).

2 And
the LORD appeared unto him
, and said, Go not down into Egypt; dwell in the land which I shall tell thee of:

(26.2)
“The Lord appeared unto him.”
49 Can God be seen?

3 Sojourn in this land, and I will be with thee, and will bless thee; for unto thee, and unto thy seed, I will give all these countries, and I will perform the oath which I sware unto Abraham thy father;

4 And I will make thy seed to multiply as
the stars of heaven
, and will give unto thy seed all these countries; and in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed;

(26.4)
“The stars of heaven”
God promises to make Isaac’s descendents as numerous as “the stars of heaven”, which, of course, never happened. The Jews have always been a small minority.
69 Will there be many Jews?

5 Because that Abraham obeyed my voice, and kept my charge, my commandments, my statutes, and my laws.

6 And Isaac dwelt in Gerar:

7 And the men of the place asked him of his wife; and he said,
She is my sister
: for he feared to say, She is my wife; lest, said he, the men of the place should kill me for Rebekah; because she was fair to look upon.

(26.7)
“She is my sister.”
Isaac uses the same “she’s my sister” lie that his father used so effectively on the Pharaoh and the same king Abimelech. (12.13, 20.2).
(You’d think Abimelech wouldn’t fall for the same stupid lie twice. But, hey, this is the Bible!)

8 And it came to pass, when he had been there a long time, that Abimelech king of the Philistines looked out at a window, and saw, and, behold,
Isaac was sporting with Rebekah
his wife.

(26.8)
“Isaac was sporting with Rebekah.”
The king “looked out a window, and saw, behold, Isaac was sporting with Rebekah his wife.” But Isaac grew rich from the lie anyway, just as his father had.