The Soft Whisper of Dreams (6 page)

Alex smiled and nodded, although he only had the haziest of memories of that night. ‘Of course. Jenna. Good to see you. Sorry, I’ve, er … not been around for a while, so I’m having trouble with names.’ A lame excuse, but it was all she’d get.

‘That’s okay, I’m the same. There’s, like, so many people around here. Can’t remember them all.’ She kept her gaze fastened on him and put one hand on his arm. ‘So are you around now? We should go out sometime, you know, for old times’ sake. I’m always up for a drink.’

‘Well, I …’ Alex was out of practice and didn’t know how to tell her no without offending her. But just at that moment, Maddie came hurtling through the door, flushed as if she’d just run a mile, and despite her obviously dishevelled state, his pulse started racing. She hadn’t even looked at him yet and still his body reacted. Alex cursed silently.

I’ve got it bad.

Maddie spotted him and came over to join him. ‘I’m so sorry I’m late, I forgot the time,’ she said, then glanced at Jenna. ‘Hope I’m not interrupting?’ She pulled out a chair and sat down, picking up the menu and studying it intently. Alex wondered what she’d been up to, but refrained from asking.

‘Not at all. Jenna was just leaving,’ he said, hoping it was true. Jenna was busy throwing Maddie an icy glare, but his words registered eventually. She turned to give Alex a huge smile and a kiss on the cheek, again bending over much too far.

‘I’ll call you, sweetie,’ she said. ‘I know where you live. Marcombe Hall, right?’

‘Er, at the moment, yes, but it’s ―’

Jenna didn’t give him a chance to explain that this was a temporary arrangement. ‘No worries, I’ll find you,’ she promised, and Alex was sure she would. She had a steely look of determination in her eyes and for once he felt like the prey instead of the hunter he’d used to be. He didn’t like it. ‘Byeee,’ she cooed and sauntered off with a sassy wiggle.

Damn. Alex could see that Maddie was on edge again now, and just when he’d got her to relax a bit in his company earlier. Typical.

He took a deep breath and tried to sound normal as he asked Maddie, ‘Got all your shopping done?’

‘What? Oh, yes, thank you.’ She indicated the carrier bags she had deposited on the floor. ‘I found everything I needed.’

Alex noticed a rather large bag with ‘Gillian’s Artists’ Materials’ written on the outside and seized on this topic of conversation. ‘Are you an artist?’ he asked, curious to find out more about her. Kayla had told him Maddie worked as a legal secretary, just like she herself used to do.

‘Well, not exactly. I just sketch for pleasure now and again. I don’t really get much time for it, but now that I’m here on holiday for a while I thought I would have a go. There are so many pretty views around Marcombe.’

‘Yes, absolutely. Will you let me see the finished results?’

‘I don’t know about that.’ She looked enchantingly shy all of a sudden. ‘I’m really not that good.’

‘Please? I promise not to laugh. I can’t draw to save my life, in fact, I should think Jago is better at it than I am.’ He smiled at her and was pleased to see an answering smile on her face. Good, she was relaxing again. She had a generous, pouting sort of mouth that would be perfect for kissing. Alex almost groaned. I have to stop this or I’ll drive myself mad.

‘Okay, fine, but if you do laugh I’ll hit you over the head with my paint box.’

He chuckled. ‘Sounds like a horrendous punishment. I promise to behave.’ Which was not what he wanted to do around her at all. Quite the opposite. With an inward sigh he picked up the menu.

‘Maddie, are you there? Can I come in?’

Kayla knocked, but came into Maddie’s room before she received an answer. Maddie didn’t mind though. Her friend often popped in for an evening chat after she’d put her children to bed.

‘Come on in.’ Maddie was sitting by the open window, her chin resting on her arms, and she’d been lost in thought.

Kayla walked over to sit down on the window seat next to her. ‘Hey, are you all right?’

‘Yes, I think so.’ Maddie sighed and stared into the distance once more. Am I all right? She wasn’t sure.

‘Well, you seemed a bit sort of lost during dinner and now you look almost … haunted. I couldn’t help wondering if something was the matter. Did Alex upset you today? I know he can be quite the charmer, but I thought he had grown out of his old ways and stopped flirting with anything in a skirt.’

‘Alex? No, he has nothing to do with this. I’m sorry if I wasn’t very good company.’

‘That’s okay. What’s up then?’

‘Well ...’ Maddie hesitated, then made up her mind. She had to tell someone or she’d go mad. ‘Kayla, you know I told you about the strange things that gypsy woman said to me and how they fit in with a recurring dream I have?’

‘Yes.’

‘Today something happened and I think it might be connected with her prophecy somehow.’

‘How do you mean?’

Maddie knew Kayla had experienced strange things herself a few years past, so it didn’t surprise her that she didn’t question Maddie’s feelings. As far as Kayla was concerned, paranormal things happened and she believed in them wholeheartedly.

‘It was weird, but a man bumped into me down by the marina in Dartmouth, and when I looked at him I thought I recognised him. At first I wasn’t sure why, but I’ve thought about it and I think he’s the man in my dream. The one who grabs me from behind.’ She shuddered. ‘The one who is evil, as the gypsy said.’

‘Did he give any sign that he knew you?’

‘No, he was just angry, as if the whole thing had been my fault. Called me a bloody tourist, or something like that. I followed him on impulse and found out he’s a minister of some sort called Blake-Jones. Have you heard of him?’

‘Oh, yes, actually I have. He’s one of those “fire and brimstone” preachers who put the fear of God into their congregations. Leader of some strange sect apparently. A friend of mine told me he has a wife and daughter who creep around like mice, afraid of their own shadows. The man must be a bully.’

‘Sounds right. He sure looked like one! Grumpy as hell. Not my idea of a man of God.’ Maddie shivered again, recalling that dark visage.

‘So what are you going to do about it? Are you going to talk to him?’

‘No way, absolutely not! I’d rather not meet him again, thank you very much, but I’ve come to a decision. I think I need to find out who I really am. You know, who my real parents were, like you said. Perhaps my strange dreams are connected to my past. What do you think?’

‘Are you sure they don’t just stem from some incident in your childhood? I mean, you would hardly remember anything from before your adoption since you were only a baby. Did you ever ask your parents?’

‘I told my mum about the dream when I was little, but she always said it was just my imagination. My parents didn’t have any friends or acquaintances with either black or red beards. In fact, none with beards at all. Anyway, if something had happened to me that could result in such nightmares, I’m sure she would have told me.’

‘Hmm, well, maybe you’re right. You do need to find out more. If I were you, I think I’d be curious anyway. There must have been a good reason why your natural parents couldn’t keep you. I mean, having had children myself, I can’t imagine ever giving them up, but I suppose there are circumstances that might make it necessary.’

‘Yes, that’s what I thought.’ Maddie had to admit she was curious now. The feeling had been growing ever since she’d found out she was adopted, even though her first reaction had been one of anger and disbelief. Mixed with the curiosity, however, was that fear of rejection which had so far prevented her from making enquiries, but she knew now she couldn’t let it stop her. She had no illusions there would be a happy reunion, but even if her birth parents didn’t want to acknowledge her, she still needed to find out why they’d given her up. At the moment her background was simply a black void and it needed to be filled with information, whether good or bad. It would help her to come to terms with it all.

‘If you don’t mind, I’ll go back to London for a few days and see what I can find out. Tomorrow I’ll call social services to see if I have to make an appointment or anything first.’

‘Good idea. I think you have to get this out of your system before you look to the future.’

Maddie nodded. ‘Thanks, Kayla.’ Her stomach was churning at the thought of what might lie ahead, but there was no alternative. This was something she had to do.

Maddie didn’t waste any time and the next morning she made a series of phone calls. When she’d finished she went in search of Kayla, and found her in the kitchen.

‘I did it. I found out what to do.’

‘Great, so what did they say?’

‘Well, the lady I spoke to wouldn’t give me any information over the phone, but I’ve made an appointment to go and see a counsellor next week. It’s not a requirement because I was born after 1975 and the law changed then and things became more open, but she said it was a good idea. This is quite a big step to take and I agree with her it would be great to have some guidance.’

‘So there’s no problem about finding out who your parents were?’

‘Not as such. People who had their children adopted before 1975 were told that those children would never be able to trace them, but nowadays they’re not given any guarantees. That doesn’t mean they want to be found though.’

‘I guess not. Tricky, isn’t it?’

‘Yes, although they have to disclose the information by law, I think they want me to understand the seriousness of what I’m doing. I have to bring proof of identity, and the woman said the counsellor will give me further details at the interview.’

‘When are you leaving?’

‘I’ll go up to London on Tuesday, the interview is on Wednesday.’

‘Fine. Hurry back, though, won’t you? You only just got here, so we don’t want to lose you yet.’

‘Don’t worry. Wild horses couldn’t keep me in London right now.’

London was dirty and noisy compared to Marcombe, and Maddie wrinkled her nose as she stepped off the train. The odours of pollution and humanity hung over everything like a soggy blanket in the humid summer heat, and she felt contaminated by the dust all around her. It was strange, but she had never noticed before, simply taken it for granted as so many other city dwellers did. London was a wonderful place in many ways, and all its inhabitants had learned to live with both the pros and cons. Occasionally, however, it was a relief to escape from the hustle and bustle of the big city. Maddie had an urge to turn around and catch the train back to Devon, never to return, but her determination to find out more about her background won out. She picked up her bag and headed for the exit.

As she made her way by tube to the tiny flat in Fulham which she shared with her friend Jessie, doubts niggled at her. Was she doing the right thing? Was there really anything to gain by digging up the past? Shouldn’t she be happy that she had been raised by two wonderful people who had cared for her very much? They had been her family. They’d wanted her, unlike her birth parents. She sighed and wiped perspiration off her brow with the back of her hand. The questions whirled round inside her tired brain, but it all came back to one thing – she needed to know. It was as simple as that.

The flat was a short walk from Fulham Broadway tube station and it wasn’t long before she was putting the key in the front door.

‘Maddie! What are you doing here? I thought you were on holiday.’ Jessie had been sitting on the sofa, engrossed in a book, and looked up as Maddie entered. She smiled broadly and jumped up to give her friend a welcoming hug, her long, auburn hair swinging out behind her. Jessie’s violet eyes looked enormous, magnified as they were by a fashionable pair of glasses with lilac frames.

The two girls had met during one of Maddie’s temping assignments and had hit it off immediately. Jessie was quiet and bookish and her main hobby was genealogy, which she pursued with never-ending fascination, but she had a quiet sense of humour which appealed to Maddie and the two of them shared many other interests.

‘I’m sorry, Jessie, I forgot to call and tell you I was coming. It’s only temporary though. Something’s come up.’

‘Oh? Must be interesting if it made you return to this hell-hole. Honestly, this last week I really thought I was going to die of heatstroke. My office has no air-conditioning and the windows barely open. I’ve tried to persuade the boss to install some, or at least buy us all fans, but he says it’s not worth it for just a few weeks a year. Tight git.’ Jessie patted the sofa. ‘Come and sit down. I’ll pour us a glass of wine and you can tell me what’s going on.’

At the end of a catch-up chat, Jessie suddenly remembered something. ‘Sorry, I forgot to tell you – your sister rang. Wanted to discuss something with you.’

‘Oh? When was this?’

‘A couple of days ago. Actually, she’s left several messages since then, but I’ve ignored her.’ Jessie smiled. ‘I thought I’d let you deal with her.’

‘Thanks,’ Maddie said, making a face. ‘Just what I need. I guess I’d better call her back straight away and get it over with.’

Olivia, as usual, didn’t have time for any niceties. ‘At last,’ she exclaimed, without so much as a ‘hello’. ‘Where the hell have you been?’

‘None of your business.’ Maddie was through being conciliatory and she’d hoped never to hear from Olivia again. ‘You rang?’

‘Yes, I need the silver tea spoons.’

‘Excuse me?’

‘You heard me – the silver spoons you took. I’m having a little dinner party and I need them back. They belong to the rest of the cutlery set Mum and Dad had and …’

‘No!’ Maddie almost shouted, then took a deep breath and started again. ‘No, they were given to me by the aunts and uncles on my tenth birthday. There’s a card inside the box signed by them all. Mum said they’d decided I was old enough to be given something “useful” instead of toys. So go buy your own tea spoons.’

Olivia went quiet for a second, but soon rallied. ‘Fine, whatever. But you’ll have to give back Mum’s gold bracelet. I don’t see why you should have that. Or at the very least, we should sell it and split the money.’