The Space Within (The Book of Phoenix #3) (20 page)

I drifted off into an unexpected peace.

“Oh,
hell
no!” Bex’s voice pierced through the curtain of Darkness. It was distant at first, but she’d apparently returned to her body because it came clearer and firmer with each word she spoke. “You two get the fuck up. If you don’t care about yourselves, at least think about Hayden and me stuck on this world by ourselves. And think about Asia and Jeric. They’ll go Dark with you, right? Is that what you want, Leni?”

I groaned, wanting to protest, but she knew exactly what to say.

“No. Not my Jeric,” I murmured, and I rolled over onto my side, too tired to stay upright.

Something cold clamped around my arm and shook me.

“Then get your sweet little ass up, and let’s get the hell out of this place,” Bex ordered. She tugged at me, forcing me back upright. “How do we do this? We haven’t left the place where the Gate is, so how do we get it back?”

Thank God I didn’t have to answer her, because I really didn’t know and possessed no energy to think about it. Fortunately, the Gate lit up all around us as if responding to her need. I squeezed my eyes shut against the bright light as I listened to Bex and Hayden grow excited about an opening, and then deflated when Bex realized it wasn’t Earth. They did this several times while Brock and I still sat on the ice, curled into ourselves.

“What happens if we stay in here until the appropriate hole opens up?” Hayden asked.

My head lolled side to side on my neck. “I dunno.”

“Can we do that?” Bex asked. “Would it let us just stay in here?”

“Could just bring us back to the last world,” I muttered. “Or take us to the Space Between.”

“What’s that? What happens there?”

“We die,” Brock said flatly.

I didn’t know if that was entirely true, but didn’t have the energy to argue. I wondered instead if there was some way for us to get to the Space Between, and then if Brock and I could summon our other halves there. Of course, Brock was probably right and that would mean our physical bodies would have to die, but it could possibly mean our souls would be reunited. Our bodies were only temporary anyway.

The Space Between could be our last hope.

“Ohmagosh! That looks like the real Earth!” Bex squealed. “I’ve seen that place before, when I dated a guy in Tampa. I’ve been on that bridge!”

I peeled an eye open and peeked through. A familiar site of Tampa Bay and the surrounding city showed through the expanding hole. Both of my eyes popped fully open, and I crawled closer to get a better look. The Sunshine Skyway Bridge stretched across the bay to our left. The city sprawled out in front of us, beyond the water. We seemed to be right in the middle of the bay itself … as though on an island.

“It can’t be,” I breathed. I reached behind for Brock. “Brock, look! Is it real? Is it
our
Earth?”

He didn’t answer me. The hole opened wider, the world beyond became clearer, and I gasped at the sight straight ahead. A rundown hotel. A big mansion sitting in the center of it. How could that possibly exist on any other world?

“Oh, my god! That’s the Phoenix Manor! Come on!”

I reached behind me again, grabbed Brock’s wrist, and sprang toward the hole.

Chapter 19

The feelings were suffocating. The Darkness smothering. Vague and distant memories that I couldn’t bring into focus and knew I didn’t want to. The emotions that came along with them were more than enough, and they weren’t mine. Not all of them anyway.

Asia must have been writing in the Book of Phoenix, because I woke up feeling her story again. Relived along with her the horror of the accident that killed Brock’s son and mother. That shit brought on my own memories of the wreck that took my hearing and the lives of my sister and parents, but I somehow summoned the power to walk down the hall to check on Asia. The Book lay on the floor in the middle of the hallway outside her room, and she refused to open the door.

I’d picked up the Book and barely made it back to my own room before succumbing to the sadness and the Darkness. That’s when the onslaught began. Like a fucking whip of emotions, one snap against the flesh of my soul after another. Pain, loss, sadness, depression, fear, horror … crack, crack, CRACK.

And then the peace of Darkness. The beautiful serenity. So easy to sink into …

No!
I wouldn’t give in. I wouldn’t let the Darkness win. I’d hang on, if not for myself, then for Leni.

I forced myself off the floor where I’d been sitting against the wall with my knees to my chest and walked over to the dresser where the iPod was. Music had always been my refuge when I was younger. Where I went when I needed to escape the real world. How I dealt with being a teen trying to figure out life. I’d fallen out of the habit as soon as I lost my hearing, but had picked it up again in the last few days.

With the earphones stuck in my ears, I tapped the shuffle button and sat on the bed. I leaned against the headboard and closed my eyes, shutting out the rest of the world. I tried to clear my head and lose myself in the lyrics, the harmony, the riffs of the guitar, and rhythm of the drums … the individual notes the singer held. Several songs played before the weight on my chest lifted.

And then Closer by Nine Inch Nails came on.

The image of Leni dancing immediately popped into my head and played behind my eyelids. She looked at me with those sea-green eyes, holding her gaze on my face as her arms lifted and swung to the beat, her shoulders moved to and fro, her tits strained against her top, and her hips swayed side to side. Her strong legs moved her body, and she did that move strippers do—squatting down and coming up slowly, her pelvis making slow circles, her perfect ass sliding back and forth, in and out of reach.

She danced her way closer to me, circled her arms around my neck and rocked side to side, just close enough for her tits to brush against my chest. Then she turned and backed into me, moving that round globe of her ass against my dick. I imagined placing my hands on her hips, stroking my fingers over her thighs … because that’s all I could do. Imagine.

She felt so close, yet was worlds away.

I grabbed my tablet and banged out a few lines of a song I’d started for her, but the need to touch her, to feel her body against mine again became overwhelming. If I couldn’t be with her, I could at least be surrounded by her things. Two minutes later, I was banging on Asia’s door.

“What?” she snapped as she threw open the door. “Can’t you take a hint? Besides the fact that it’s seven o’clock in the fucking morning?”

Was it? I hadn’t even noticed the time.

“Can I borrow your car?” I asked. A couple of Guardians had retrieved the Camaro from where we’d abandoned it on the side of I-4 in our rush to bring Bex to the Gate. Asia’s brows scrunched, and her lips parted, but I butted in. “I’m going to Lake Haven. Need to pick up a few things from the camper.”

She blinked. Again. Rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. Another moment passed as she processed what I meant, not buying my excuse. “Jeric, the Lakari—”

“Fuck ’em. Let them come for me. I’m ninety percent there anyway. And when they do, I’d rather be in Leni’s camper than this prison.”

“What if they come back? Brock and Leni?”

I leveled my gaze on her. “Do you really think that’s going to happen?”

My hope had all but deteriorated, and I sure as hell was sick of sitting around this place doing nothing but waiting and growing more miserable by the second.

Asia had no answer for me, except to say, “I’m driving.”

She needed a few minutes to put on some real clothes and pull herself a little more together than how she’d answered the door—looking like a hermit. As I waited, the anticipation built, and by the time she was ready, the urge to get out of here had grown so strong, I nearly opened the window and made the eight-story leap to the ground. But since Leni and I weren’t together, I couldn’t rely on my Phoenix abilities and strengths to survive the jump. So I tore down the stairs, out the door, and to Asia’s Camaro with her right on my heels.

She slid her big sunglasses on her face to cover her red, swollen eyes, and then peeled out of the parking lot. She pushed the Camaro to its potential as we headed north toward the Florida-Georgia state line, finally away from the Phoenix manor and the watchful eyes of the other Guardians. They’d shit a brick if they knew we’d left on our own, but then again, maybe they didn’t care. Maybe they’d come to the conclusion Asia and I had that the odds of us surviving were approaching zero. And once we were gone, they could return to business as usual and not have to worry about choosing us over the rest of Earth.

When Asia turned into the RV park and I saw the camper, I had a moment of thinking I couldn’t deal with going near it. But by the time she parked in front of it, the moment had passed. I needed to be inside it as badly as I needed to be inside Leni herself. I jumped out of the car, and Asia took off for the apartment down the road that she and Brock shared.

I didn’t have the key, so I had to jimmy the lock with a credit card. Once inside, I flew to the bedroom, belly-flopped onto the bed, and gathered the blanket and pillows to my face. I rolled around in them, wishing they were her. One hand fisted around something softer than the sheets—the peach-colored camisole she’d slept in that had been stuffed under her pillow. I pressed it against my nose and inhaled my girl’s scent deeply, trying to soak it all the way in so it could fill my blood and saturate my bones. I closed my eyes. My arms flopped outward. I imagined the Darkness taking me away like this, enveloping me in its promise of silence and peace.

But reality didn’t cooperate.

Only minutes into my solitude, sharp pain wracked through my gut. My thighs clenched up to my chest, and my shoulders pulled down. When I thought the spasm had passed, I barely moved when another shot through me. Like a giant hook speared into my stomach and yanked on by some unseen force. Yanking me back toward the manor.

Fuck.

I didn’t want to go back. I wanted to fight it. But the pain only worsened the longer I lay there, curled on my side, moaning. I managed to roll to my knees and push myself up, untangling myself from the sheets. A car horn blew outside, not right outside but not as far as the highway either. I glanced out the window. The yellow Camaro was fishtailing toward the camper. Asia must have felt the painful draw to the manor, too.

I grabbed Leni’s backpack sitting in the corner of the room and stuffed it with as much as I could manage to gather. Some clothes for me. A few of her things, including the camisole. The car honked again.

“Jeric,” Asia hollered. My gaze flew around the room, and then I backed toward the kitchen and the door. Nothing caught my eye that could be helpful. Another spasm tore through my gut, and I ran out to the car. “Can’t … stay … have to … go … back.”

She could barely talk, panting her way through the words as her face screwed up in pain.

“Are you sure you can drive?” I asked, and in answer, her body curled into itself and her head pressed on the steering wheel’s horn. I pulled her back, then hopped out of the car and ran around to the driver’s side. She’d already moved over to the passenger seat. I was barely in and backing out when a dark form dropped in front of the car. Other Lakari dropped around us, taking their human figures. “Hang on.”

I yanked the steering wheel to spin the car and at the same time threw the transmission into gear. We hit a couple of the Lakari, who shattered and disintegrated. The others returned to their Dark soul forms and followed us, knowing how vulnerable we were. On total gut instinct, I turned right out of the RV park instead of heading for the highway.

“Where … are … you going?” Asia asked. One of her arms held tightly against her stomach, and her free hand gripped the edge of the seat, her knuckles bone-white.

I didn’t answer her. As soon as the Lakari thought they had us, the manor had lost its pull on me. Instead, I felt the need to go in this direction. We passed through town, and then I turned right, then left. I made the turns on total gut feeling.

“What the hell, Jeric?” Asia demanded as I stood on the brake at a sudden dead end, nothing but trees and water ahead of us. “It’s swamp land. And now we’re trapped!”

A six-foot tall, chain-link fence topped with barbed wire edged the trees in front of us with a red and white sign hanging on it: “No Trespassing by Order of the Lake Haven City Council. These springs are closed to the public.” I had no idea why I needed to come here, but my stomach didn’t hurt as bad and Asia could breathe better, so there must have been a reason. She was twisted in her seat, looking through the back window with wide eyes, so I glanced into the rearview mirror. Several Shadowmen stood at the other end of the road, the only way out of here.

We were in no shape to fight.

“Why are they just standing there?” Asia whispered.

“No fucking clue …” I’d barely finished the word when a new hook stabbed into my gut. Asia whimpered.

“The … manor,” she choked out.

The need to be here disappeared as quickly as it had come, and I had no idea what we were doing here. No idea why the hell the Shadowmen were at the end of the road. No idea how we were going to drive back to the manor through this pain.

I gripped the gearshift and pulled it into reverse, then stomped on the gas. The car charged down the road, and I spun it again. A large, dark shape barreled down the other road, about to cross in front of us. I slammed on the brake, and so did the driver coming toward us. The Shadowmen didn’t fly back into their spirit forms, though. Instead, more dropped down to the road, circling the Camaro. I kept my foot on the brake, but gunned the engine. Sand spewed from the back tires. If I could get through the Shadowmen, there was just enough room to pass the truck that had almost hit us. Surely they’d leave the human in there alone.

Pain charged through me again, though. Blinding this time. I couldn’t say if it had been Asia or me who’d had the presence of mind to put the car into park. We were both screaming. The Darkness pressed in on us from all sides of the car, the dark of night as the Shadowmen swarmed in on us. My eyes barely caught a white streak through the Darkness before they squeezed shut from the agony. The sounds of nails scraping on glass were followed by siren shrieks. I clamped my hands over my ears. The car door opened. The Lakari were coming for us, excited for their long-awaited success. I leaned toward the console and blindly kicked out at whatever tried to make its way in, my last ditch effort before succumbing to the inevitable. I was surprised when my foot connected with something solid.

“Can’t believe I’m saving your stupid asses.” A male voice but heavily laced with a feminine edge. Mat. My eyes sprang open. The Darkness was gone. “Yeah, we followed you. Scared the fuckers off with a little help from that cat. Now move over.”

Asia and I exchanged a glance. She cringed with another bout of pain, then moved between the seats into the back.

“You’re too damn big to crawl over,” Mat said with an exaggerated sigh, and he pulled me out of the driver’s side and walked me around the car before shoving me into the passenger’s seat. He waved at the driver of the truck that had almost hit us—Kel—before sliding into the driver’s seat. “Told him I get to drive this bitch if we were doing this. You know, all you had to do was tell us you wanted to come up here. We would have guarded you.”

“We didn’t
want
chaperones,” I growled as I stared out the window, my arms crossed over my stomach. We were already headed back to the highway. The Darkness of the Lakari stayed with us overhead, but with Kel and Mat nearby, we weren’t as vulnerable as we had been.

“You apparently
needed
them, though.”

“Depends on how you look at it,” Asia said quietly from the backseat.

Mat glanced at her in the rearview mirror. “Honey, don’t you two go gettin’ suicidal on us. We’re doing everything we can to help you out. If we’re doin’ it for nothin’, that will seriously throw my panties in a bunch.”

We drove back to Tampa in silence. Asia and I were silent, anyway. Mat turned on the radio and belted out song after song. I wished I were deaf again. I pressed my forehead against the window and scowled the whole way back. Each mile we came closer to the manor brought more relief from the pain, until it returned to the same agony I’d been living with since Leni disappeared. I’d become used to it, I supposed, because I didn’t think anything could be worse until we’d been so far away. Or maybe the Darkness had set in and numbed it some. Either way, this was at least tolerable.

We were back at the manor by late afternoon. I trudged my way upstairs to my room, threw Leni’s backpack on the bed, and pulled out the camisole. Without turning the lights on, I lay on the bed fully clothed, facing the ceiling, and held the little peach top to my nose. I breathed her in as I drifted off.

“
Jeric.
”

What the hell? I bolted upright. Morning sun streamed through the crack in the curtains, and Leni’s voice came loud and clear in my head. I knew the sense of smell was powerful, but this was more than a memory. I could feel it in my soul. I could feel
her
in my soul.

“
Jeric, baby, I’m here. We made it!
”

Yesterday’s flight down the stairs was slower than a turtle compared to how I bolted down the stairs now and out to the bay. Super-fucking-man wouldn’t have anything on me. I felt Leni out there, close but not close enough. Even from here, I could see the light of the Gate shining through the water. I ran into the bay, and when it became too deep to run, I prepared to swim.

“Leni!” I yelled before I sucked in a breath to take the dive down.

But a huge black shape soared through the water toward me. Not until it broke the surface did I learn that it wasn’t a single shape, but several. Dozens of Lakari flew upwards, searching for their comrades in the sky. They didn’t have to go far—the Lakari were always overhead. Their appearance was like a signal, and all of them swarmed down.

I ran back for the shore where I’d be able to fight better on solid ground. The earth quaked underneath my feet. Guardians poured out of the manor, but Asia already stood on the edge of the bay. As I ran out of the water and across the beach to the grassy lawn of the manor, the Lakari screeched overhead, the sound like fingernails on a chalkboard. I turned around and looked up to see them all meld into a large, black cloud that soared away.

“Do you feel them?” Asia asked, running up to me. She wore a man’s shirt, Brock’s I assumed, that reached her knees and tight legging things underneath. Her voice was filled with more hope and excitement than I’d ever heard. A complete turnaround from how she’d been when we’d arrived back yesterday.

“Yeah. I heard her, too, you know—” I twirled a finger around my head and peach fabric flapped between my fingers, spraying drops of water. “In my head …”

My voice trailed off as I opened my fist with Leni’s camisole still in it. Asia looked down at the soaking wet material, and the look on her face meant she knew exactly what it was.

She tugged at the hem of her shirt. “Looks like you had the same idea I did. I’ve been wearing Brock’s shirt since we got back.”

My jaw clenched.

“Yeah, well, I’m not
wearing
it, Asia,” I muttered as I stuffed the top into my back pocket.

We waited on the edge of the water along with the other Phoenix for news from the Guardians who had been on duty. The longer we waited, the more the truth settled in. I
had
felt Leni’s presence in this world again.

But I didn’t any more.

“Just the Lakari came through,” Kel announced a few minutes later. His eyes found Asia and me, and he shook his head.

“Bullshit,” I said.

“We felt them here,” Asia added. “What happened to them?”

“There were only the Lakari,” Kel said. “They had to work to get the Gate closed because more were trying to push through. More of those monsters, too.”