The Truth About Fairy Tales (11 page)

             
He searched my face, no doubt seeing all of my uncertainties right there in every inch of it and then he opened the door wider and silently let me in.

             
Jackson still wasn’t giving anything away. But I feared the worse.

             
I tried to face him and say something—anything, but I couldn’t trust my voice. I turned away with Sidney squirming in my arms and tried to explain my ridiculous behavior.

             
“I don’t know what you want from me. I’m not sure…it’s hard…I don’t trust people, I guess. I’ve never been good at making connections and…” At that moment, Sidney yelped interrupting my train of thought. Jackson took him from my arms and let him out into his perfectly manicured backyard.

             
When I would have protested, he stopped me. “He’ll be okay. He can’t go anywhere. You’re doing fine. Keep talking.”

             
I probably could have had it not been for the hard sound of his voice. The sound that told me I was wasting my time. He’d made up his mind about me and I wasn’t worth the effort. I was so close to walking out on him and, I hate to say it, dear old Sidney as well.

             
I think Jackson sensed all of that when he reached for me and pulled me into his arms.

             
“You’re doing fine, Maggie…just keep talking to me.”

             
And I did. I told him all the things that I hadn’t been able to tell him before about my life with my mother. All of my old insecurities and somewhere through it all, I ended up feeling safe in his arms at last.

             
“Maggie, I know it’s been hard on you growing up like that. I can’t even begin to image how difficult that would have been for a little girl, especially one as sensitive as you.”

             
Was I sensitive? I’d always pictured myself tough as nails, but Jackson saw something in me that apparently I didn’t see in myself.

             
“I promise I won’t hurt you. I want to be with you. I don’t want you to be hurt. Thank you for sharing how hard it is for you to trust people. I understand now. Before, well, I guess I was reading it all wrong. I thought you still had feeling for Ben or maybe you believed the things Ben told you about me. I’m not that person, Maggie, but the only way I can prove it to you is if you let me. You have to start trusting me just a little, Maggie. I promise I won’t ask you for too much too soon. Please just trust me.”

             
I couldn’t say the words, but I was nodding. I wanted to believe him now. Wanted to trust his words, but deep down I knew it was going to be some time before I did. After all, the old Maggie still existed as part of me. I’d lived with her insecurities for too long to throw them all away at once.

             
“So where were you going today anyway?” He asked at last. I still held onto him like I was afraid of letting him go. I could feel him smiling against my hair. I  desperately wanted to believe this guy wasn’t like the man I’d thought him to be.

             
“To see my grandmother.”

             
“How long has it been since you’ve seen her?”

             
I finally let him go. “A few months. I’ve been busy with school and work.”

             
“Do you still want to go?” he asked sweetly. I shook my head.

             
“No, I was only running away…”

             
“Yes, I realize that now, but I don’t want you to miss your grandmother either. Will you let me come home with you this weekend? I’d like to meet her. She sounds like quite a remarkable woman.”

             
I looked at him in surprise. “You want to come home with me?”

             
Jackson actually smiled indulgently at my innocent question. “Yes, little bit, I want to go home with you. I want to see where you grew up, meet your grandmother and this Lee Worthy who is so important to you. I want to see where little Maggie came from. I promise I won’t push. I’ll give you lots of space. I just want to be with you. I can get a room at one of the local hotels and you can have as much time alone with your grandmother as you’d like. How does that sound to you?”

             
It sounded wonderful to me and I’m afraid all of my happiness was right there on my face for him to see.

             
“Is she expecting you today? Do you need to call her and let her know you’ll be there tomorrow instead of tonight?”

             
“No…she’s not expecting me I was just…planning on surprising her.” What I had been doing was running away, but he knew that already and he didn’t seem in too big of a hurry to point that out to me again.

             
“Okay, then I’m taking you out on the town, Miss Monroe, and then we’ll leave for grandma’s house first thing in the morning.

             
We ended up at a very classy restaurant, high above one of the bigger hotels in downtown Austin. Later, Jackson took me to one of his favorite blues clubs just off Six Street, where we danced to slow songs until after midnight. Without really trying, he made me feel more special than I ever had before in my life.

             
It was the perfect evening, with the perfect ending. Jackson and I made love in his perfect bed and I almost believed I could work this whole thing out. I could find a way to fit into his perfect world.

Chapter Seven

              If my sweet grandmother was the least bit surprised to see me show up at her house in a very expensive car in the company of one very polished man, she had the good grace not to show it.

             
Gran lives alone in her small house on one of the quiet little streets of Santa Anna, just off the main highway.

             
She’s lived in that little white house forever—at least, as long as I can remember. My grandmother worked hard all her life as did her husband, the grandfather that I’d never known before. He’d died before I ever even came into the world.

             
Grandma Sarah had been a teacher for most of her life. She’d put herself through school working several jobs and had supported her daughter, my mother, on her own after my grandfather passed away.

             
That was until Rachel ran away. Once I’d come into the picture, there’d been another mouth to feed.

             
Gran never complained though. She was a shining example for me of just what hard work could do for you and how you could only count on yourself to make your world better. She’d taught me all these things by example.

             
I loved Grandma Sarah more than I'd ever loved another human being in my life. Even though she was my grandmother and the closest person in the world to me, I still kept part of myself closed off from her as well.

             
I guess deep down inside I’d always believed my stay with her would be temporary. My past would someday come back to find me and I’d be forced to leave again, back with my mother living in one of those rat-infested apartments or worse, out on the streets again.

             
In the end, I’d been right—it had caught me. In fact, it never really let me go. I could never forget where I came from because it was always there. I was always reminding myself of what a failure I, too, could be. I was just a heartbeat away at any time from becoming my mother.

             
I was more nervous than I could ever remember being at the prospect of Jackson meeting my grandmother and he knew it.

             
He held Sidney with one arm and my hand in the other while I stood on my grandmother’s porch and knocked.

             
I’d called her just before we got into town to let her that I was coming and that I was bringing someone with me. I could almost swear she wasn’t surprised.

             
During my weekly calls to Gran, I knew she’d picked up on some my uncertainties over Jackson. Although I never once mentioned I was seeing someone.

             
“Hi Gran.” She unlatched the screen door and came out to greet us, all ninety pounds of her. Blond hair faded now with gray, but those sixty-year-old brown eyes were still as sharp and as all seeing as ever, and so unlike my own.

             
My mother had brown eyes like Gran’s, but mine were green. I could only assume I’d inherited those from the man who fathered me.

             
“Maggie, child, let me have a look at you.” She held me at arm’s length and looked me over, thoroughly taking in every single detail. I’d begun turning several different shades of red at this point.

             
I could almost swear she knew that I’d gone against every single one of my Christian upbringings by sleeping with the man at my side.

             
“And who is this with you and Sidney?” she asked at last, her sharp gaze focused on Jackson.

             
“Gran, this is Jackson Riley…a friend of mine from Austin.” I hated that awkward way the word slipped off my tongue, but I didn’t know what else to call him in front of her. I couldn’t tell my grandmother he was my lover.

             
Jackson’s hand slipped out of mine and he took the one my grandmother held out to him. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mrs. Monroe.”

             
She sized him up easily enough in one quick glance. From the well-groomed hair to the jeans and shirt that cost a fortune, right down to the expensive car he drove. Gran could see Jackson had money, but to my grandmother money meant absolutely nothing. Character was everything, as was honesty and caring about your fellow human being. Those were the things that she would judge him by and she looked right inside him and I believe my grandmother saw the good in him.

             
“Nice to meet you, Jackson. Now why don’t you both come inside where it’s cooler?”

             
I’ve always loved my grandmother’s little house. It’s small enough to be considered cozy, but big enough to find yourself alone if you are so inclined.

             
I usually had that need growing up.

             
There was that one little spot off my bedroom balcony where I’d climb up on the roof above my room. That was my secret spot. My hiding place.

             
The little Maggie would go there whenever she was frightened or hurting at something cruel some kid at school had said to me. When my childhood came back to catch me, as it always did. Although my grandmother knew about my secret place, she very seldom disturbed me there. I think she knew I needed that place to myself.

             
“How long can you two stay?” she asked when we were seated at her small wooden table in the same kitchen she’d tried to teach me how to cook in. The one thing my grandmother had failed at with me. I was a lousy cook. I could barely boil water.

             
My glance went to Jackson who took my hand again.

             
“A few days, if that’s okay with you?”

             
She smiled in that gentle way of hers without answering. I knew it was okay. It would be okay with her, no matter how long I wanted to stay. It was always okay with Gran.

             
“Now, you’ll stay with us as well won’t you, Jackson? I have a guest room right next to Maggie. You’re welcome to use it. There’s plenty of room.”

             
“That would be great, if you’re sure I’m not going to be in the way? I know Maggie hasn’t had much of a chance to spend time with you lately.”

             
Grandma Sarah reached out to touch his hand, shocking him into silence. “Don’t be silly. We’ll have plenty of time for that. Besides, I want to get to know you better as well. After all, my granddaughter doesn’t bring folks home to meet me all that often.” She turned to me and smiled again and I knew she knew the truth about my relationship with Jackson.

“Honey, why don’t I invite Lee over for dinner tonight? I know he’d love to see you again and meet your friend. Lee is an old friend of the family, Jackson. Why, he’s practically family himself isn’t he, Maggie?” Gran explained.

              I took her hand and leaned close, kissing her cheek in a totally out-of-character burst of sentimentality for the old Maggie.

             
“That’s sounds wonderful, Gran.”

             
“Good. Why don’t you and Jackson get settled in and then we can all get better acquainted?”

             
I showed Jackson up to his room.

             
“Are you sure your okay with staying here? You know if you’d prefer someplace different…” I opened the door to the guestroom and glanced around. Its furnishing reflected the age of the house. As a child, all these old pieces of furniture had fascinated me; now, they looked so simple and plain that I couldn’t help but wonder what someone like Jackson must be thinking about my humble upbringing.