This Loving Feeling (A Mirror Lake Novel) (20 page)

Then our love was lost in time

Now I’m asking for one more chance

To have forever a great romance

Please don’t leave it up to fate

You’ve got to tell me it’s not too late

’Cause you’re the girl I can’t forget

You’re the girl I can’t forget—I got to have you

The girl I can’t forget—Girl, I need you

The girl I can’t forget

People all across the lawn stood up and headed out to the dance floor to move to the catchy beat. In the grass, women kicked off their shoes and men shed their jackets. He saw the Rushfords, even Brad and Effie and the ladies, and nearly everyone he knew from town . . .

Suddenly Harris ran from the podium across the grass and scrambled onto the stage, furious and enraged. Lukas managed to weave in and out around the musicians and somehow finish the last verse. As the music finally ended Harris latched onto the mic and pulled hard.

Lukas gripped it with both hands as if he were hanging on to the last lifeboat on the
Titanic
and spoke. “And I’ll tell you who else is a jewel. You’re a jewel, Sam. You’re
my
jewel on Main Street. Hell, on any street. Don’t marry him, Sam. Don’t . . .”

He heard Sam yell his name into the podium mic and looked up. Too late. Harris threw a punch that slammed Lukas into and over the drum set. Drums clattered and cymbals crashed. A blinding pain sliced into the back of Lukas’s head and the world went black.

When he came to he was sprawled on the ground. Something warm and coppery trickled onto his lip. Harris’s enraged face hovered above him. Lightning lit up the sky and in the distance, thunder rumbled.

“You son of a bitch,” Harris said.

Then Sam was there, pushing through the crowd of people who’d rushed the stage, and through the haze, Lukas saw nothing else. Just her lovely face, full of concern and worry, and those ruby red, kissable lips. She was the only thing that mattered in all this craziness. He gestured to her, opened his mouth to say something, but Harris spoke instead.

“I’ll take care of him, Sam,” he barked. “He’s probably drunk. Go back and sit down.”

“No, Harris,” she said. “You’ve taken care of enough.” Two local security guys bent down and gripped Lukas beneath the arms. “Don’t move him,” Sam said. “EMS is coming.” Sensing the command in her voice, the guys backed off.

“Sam, it’s best to leave,” Harris said. “We’re going to get bad publicity for this.”

Sam shook her head. “I’m sorry, Harris.”

“I know. I’m sorry, too. I never meant for this to get so out of hand . . .”

“I’m not talking about this,”—she waved to Lukas on the ground, people with cameras drawing closer, the crowd in a tizzy—“I’m talking about
us
.” She faced him straight on. “I want to break up.”

“Sam, no,” Harris said. “This isn’t a good time . . .”

“There’s never a good time, is there? Not to talk and not to actually listen.”

“I was about to ask you to marry me. Doesn’t that mean anything to you?”

“It’s too little too late,” she said quietly. “We’ve been over for a long time, but neither of us has been able to let go for whatever reason. I saw strengths in you that I wanted, but was content to watch you instead of develop them in myself. But that’s cheating. I want a full life, regardless of how untraditional it is.”

“Sam, I told you. The past month has been hell. Let me make it up to you. Don’t let him”—he tossed his head toward Lukas lying on the ground—“come between us. Let me show you—”

He took a step toward her, but she held up a hand to keep him back. “You’re controlling and condescending and you care way too much about what people think of everything you do. I’m tired of making excuses for your behavior. I—I don’t love you like a woman should love a man she’s going to spend the rest of her life with. I’m sorry.”

Lukas wondered if he was hallucinating. Because she was finally giving someone else hell besides him. And because she’d finally, finally said the words he’d longed to hear. Harris stood there, his mouth hanging open, speechless for once. Sam stepped over cords and Lukas’s sprawled-out legs and knelt beside him. Well, sort of knelt because the Aircast on her leg was pretty bulky. Her warm palm swiped gently across his forehead and it felt so good he shivered. Sirens wailed in the distance.

“You should go,” Lukas managed. “This will be all over the news.”

“I’m not leaving,” Sam said, her voice shaky.

“I’m glad,” Lukas said, reaching up to take her hand. He brought it to his lips and kissed it. She had tears in her eyes, maybe because she just broken up with Harris but maybe because of him. Because
they
were finally starting.

“Are you all right?” he asked.

“Much better,” she said with a little smile. Then she bent down and kissed him on the lips. Maybe he had died and gone to heaven, or else this was the best damn dream he’d ever had. Minus the concussion, that is.

Her brother Tom finally managed to escort Harris away, thank God, although Harris did manage to flip Lukas the bird before he left.

Ben knelt on the other side of Lukas and gave him that assessing-doctor look. “The back of your head is bleeding a little.” Then Ben poked him in the lower legs and in a line up his thigh. “Where am I touching you?”

“In inappropriate places,” Lukas said.

“He’s fine,” Ben pronounced.

“Great, then help me up,” Lukas said.

“You hit your head and blacked out.” Ben laid a hand firmly on his chest. “Stay put.”

Just then, two paramedics set down a stretcher and some equipment next to his head. Ben moved aside to let them do their job.

“Send them away,” Lukas said to Ben. “You said I’m fine.”

“I said you’re fine, but I didn’t say you’re not going to the hospital. Strap him to the backboard,” Ben said to the paramedics.

“Some compassionate doctor you are,” Lukas said.

Lukas motioned with his hand for Sam to come closer. She knelt down on the grass beside him and bent her head low. Her silky hair brushed his face, its sweet fragrance enveloping him.

“Did you like the song?” he whispered.

Her eyes were soft and teary and full of feeling. “Yes.” He wanted so badly to touch her, to wipe her tears away, to kiss her, dammit, but they were slapping on a neck brace and strapping him down to the backboard and he couldn’t even reach for her.

“Our song.” He was having a difficult time talking. He might have been mumbling but he wasn’t sure. He must’ve really whacked his head on that drum set. But he really wanted her to understand. Needed her to understand. “I thought I lost you. I thought you spent the night with him.”

He felt something touch his hand. Her fingers, closing over his. He shut his eyes for just a second, lavishing in her warmth. Her softness. Her presence.

“Be with me,” he whispered.

“You stupid fool,” she said, crying openly now. “You had me when you said you wrote a song for me.” She paused and wiped a few tears from her cheeks.

“I wrote
every
song for you.”

“Okay, lovebirds,” a gray-haired paramedic said. “You’re not the only citizens of Mirror Lake who need help. Plus it’s about to pour. This bus is leaving.”

“I’m riding with him,” Sam said to Carol Abrams, one of the paramedics who’d been on the squad for about twenty years. Except she wasn’t sure Carol heard because she was busy humming a tune. It sounded a lot like the one Lukas had just sung.

“How do you know that song?’ Sam asked. “It hasn’t been released yet.”

“Howie Zambrosky from the precinct recorded it on his phone and sent it to us. He may have uploaded it to YouTube too. Great song.”

The song he’d sung for
her
. She was the girl he couldn’t forget. He’d come here to fight for her. Nothing else mattered but being with him, making up for lost years. Having the chance of a lifetime to start fresh.

Her heart knew this was right. More right than anything she’d ever felt. She didn’t know where this would lead her but she had to take the chance or she’d regret it the rest of her life.

Tom helped her into the EMS vehicle next to Lukas and handed over her purse. Sure enough, Brad was there, standing next to Tom, a big scowl on his face. “Are you okay?” he asked, looking at her with concern and tenderness that made her even more emotional.

She nodded. She tried to communicate to Brad with her eyes
. Please don’t judge me.
He looked worried, and he looked skeptical—the typical Brad look. He was sure to be disappointed in her for her rash choice.

But she just couldn’t muster up guilt. She wasn’t nineteen anymore. Her decisions were her own. She wanted to reassure him, tell him everything was going to be all right, but who knew? She was leaping into this without a clue as to what their future would hold. And of course Brad sensed that too.

On impulse, she reached out her hand to Tom, who kissed it and flashed his dimpled smile. Then she reached for Brad. He met her gaze, and she met his. Slowly, he nodded and gave her hand a warm squeeze. It seemed to say that he might not agree with her choices, but he loved her anyway. All right then. Good enough.

A strange sense of exhilaration overcame her as she climbed in beside Lukas for the ride. She was conscious that she’d made a choice, one that had severed a big chunk of her past—Harris—in exchange for a walk through uncharted territory. She’d never been one for uncertainty, but for the first time in a long time she felt—free.

“At the very least he’ll need a few stitches,” Carol said, examining the back of Lukas’s head. “And can I take a selfie with you?”

“Only if you get my good side,” Lukas said, shifting his eyes toward her since he couldn’t move his head, which Carol thought was hysterical. “What’s the very
most
I’ll need?” he asked Ben.

“Brain surgery to help you write better lyrics about my sister.”

Lukas’s mouth turned up in a half smile.

Carol laughed and took a picture. “Hey!” Lukas said. “I was kidding. That better not end up on TMZ.”

“Of course not, sweetie,” Carol said. “I’m just going to show a few of my friends before I frame it and put it next to my pillow.”

The EMS vehicle slowed nearer to the hospital. The rain was washing down in buckets now, the wipers snapping back and forth in overtime. Red and blue police lights flashed in the distance.

“What’s going on?” Sam asked.

“I’m sorry guys,” the driver, Charlie Pollick, said, “but it’s a zoo out there. TV cameras, news trucks. They’re actually blocking the entrance to the ER.”

Ben gave a curse. “Shit, Spikonos. Really?”

“Told you you shouldn’t have gone and gotten all high and mighty like that, Dr. Ben,” Lukas said. “I’ve been banged up worse in bar brawls.”

Ben levered him a look. “Trust me, Lukas, if my sister didn’t like you so much I’d be tempted to open the doors and let you slide out.” He spoke to Sam. “I want you to go home.”

“What? No way,” Sam said. “I’m staying with him.” She scootched a little closer to Lukas, just to get her point across.

“He’s fine,” Ben said. “There’s no way we can get you into the hospital without fifty people taking your picture. Is that what you really want?” But he was looking at Lukas when he said it.

Lukas tightened his grip on her hand. “He’s right, Sam.”

“I don’t care about that. Let them say whatever. Let them take my picture. I want to stay with you, Lukas.”

“You’ll be on every social media outlet in minutes,” Lukas said. “Not to mention the cover of every supermarket rag for weeks. If we wait to be seen together, we can at least control things. Besides, Stevie’s still at Ben’s. He needs to be picked up.”

“The kids are with Gloria and Maurice,” Ben said, “and all the adults just left the dinner to head home. Let him stay the night with us.”

Lukas squeezed her hand. “I’ll be fine. Maybe you should listen to your brother.”

How Sam
hated
that phrase, but Lukas looked genuinely worried. Then he flashed that perfect lopsided grin that could stun a hundred charging groupies. “It’s going to be okay,” he said. “
We’re
going to be okay.”

She believed him. God, she believed him. Finally they were on the right path together . . . if only they could actually
be
together.

“Look,” Sam said, “I don’t want the media to tell us how to live our lives. I’d like to come with you. I don’t care if I get photographed.”

He couldn’t move his head but his eyes conveyed a sense of worry. “I’d just as soon have you go home where you’ll be safe.”

“We can probably drive you around to another entrance,” Ben said. “It’s your decision.”

“My decision.” She grinned. “I’m staying.”

CHAPTER 16

Lukas drummed his fingers against the aluminum guardrail of the gurney.

He’d memorized every grain of the ugly white ceiling tiles that looked like someone had poked a hundred holes in each one, and decided the watermark in the corner looked like South America. He’d even caught a nap for a few minutes. But now he wanted one thing, besides out of this backboard contraption.

Sam. She’d stayed through his X-rays and CT scan and to hear the good news that everything was negative. But they were both worried about Stevie, so he’d had Charles and James drive Sam to Meg’s so she could check on him and bring him home. Lukas couldn’t wait to get out of here and finally be with her. If someone would only unstrap him from this god-awful backboard.

The door opened, and a balding, paunchy man squeezed through and hovered over his bedside. Dammit, it was Tony, his agent, not a nurse with discharge papers. And Tony was guaranteed not to be as pleasant.

“Well, I see you’ve had a busy day,” Tony said with a heavy sigh. “You crashed a charity event and started a brawl. The record company’s furious you sang that song before it’s released. Someone’s already put it on YouTube. Complete with slow-motion footage of you diving into the drum set.”

“How many hits did it get?” Lukas asked, but Tony just glared. “All right, never mind. Hi to you, too, Tony. And by the way, I didn’t start anything. And I’m fine, thanks for asking.”

“Well, I’m not fine. I have ulcers.” He put his hand over his stomach. “Good thing I was on the way to see you anyway. This guy you got into it with—he’s a Buckhorn, for Christ’s sakes.”

“He’s an asshole.”

“Yeah, a powerful one. Look, Lukas. We built you a brand, and you did your best to trash it tonight. We’re going to be dealing with this headache for weeks.”

“I’m not the impulsive kid I was when we started this.”

Tony snorted. “Your brand doesn’t involve being smitten over an old hometown honey. Love is the kiss of death for an up-and-coming music sensation like you.”

“I don’t live my life for my brand.”

“I can deal with the occasional angry female who curses you for breaking it off. I can even deal with you telling Simon Cowell to kiss your ass after he insulted you on Twitter. But this . . .”

Lukas took a deep breath. “This is different. This woman matters.”

“The hell she does. Was it worth it for a piece of ass?”

“Tony, so help me God, if I weren’t tied down I’d come over there and kick
your
ass . . .” Lukas flexed and unflexed his fists, trying to remember why he put up with this guy. Oh, yeah, because he was the best in the business. Because he’d brought him up from nothing and turned him into a superstar. That made him calm down a little. “Look, just do damage control. That’s why I pay you.”

“
Just do damage control
,” Tony mimicked in a mocking voice. “As if that’s easy.”

“Got any good news? How’s the wife, the kids? And why are you here in the first place?”

Tony rolled his eyes and finally sat down on a stool in the middle of the room. “Actually, I do have some good news. Mick heard the song.”

“Mick who?” Lukas asked.

Tony raised a bushy brow. “There’s only one Mick who counts. He says it’s different from your other ones. More passionate, more feeling, and he thinks it’s going to be a huge hit. He wants you to open for the Stones at Madison Square Garden in two weeks and then finish out their summer tour with them.”

Whoa.
Lukas closed his eyes. Mick Jagger? The Stones?
Two weeks?
Opening for them was the opportunity of a lifetime. It would secure his future and identify him as a heavy hitter in the industry.

That couldn’t help but be a good thing for Stevie and for Sam, right? Even if he had to go back on the road sooner than he’d thought.

“I have to think about it,” Lukas said. He’d talk it over with Sam, but she’d probably be thrilled.

“Think?” Tony looked at him like he’d grown a couple extra heads. “What’s there to think?”

Lukas shrugged, or at least tried to.

“This woman is really doing a number on you, isn’t she?” Tony asked. “Fine. You go ahead and think. But the contract’s going to have to be signed in a couple of days. Now, I’ve got to go outside and make sure all the media have moved. In the future, I’d appreciate better behavior.”

“Lighten up, Tony. That was great news. Quit acting like someone died.”

“Which they might,” Ben said, suddenly standing at the door, “if you don’t get those camera crews to move away from the ambulance drop-off area. Now, please.”

Tony left and Ben finally unstrapped Lukas from the backboard. He sat up, rubbing the back of his head and cracking his neck.

“So your head and neck scans were fine. How does your head feel?” Ben asked.

“Hurts like the band used my head for their drum set.”

He chuckled. “You’ll have to take it easy for a few days.”

“Look, Ben.” Sam’s brother stood propped against the counter, his arms folded, quietly assessing him. He had had the same big eyes as Sam, although Sam’s were green and Ben’s were brown. “I’m sorry about what happened. I didn’t mean to ruin the donor event. I couldn’t sit around and let Harris propose to Sam. He’s not right for her.”

“And you are?”

Lukas paused long and hard. He’d never thought so before. But he was different from six years ago. Better. Grown up. He knew how to make her smile. Did that have anything to do with being good for someone? It seemed a paltry offering. “I care about her a lot. I’ll do everything in my power to make her happy. I want to do things right this time.”

Ben heaved a sigh. “I don’t suppose Sam’s ever gotten over you, either. But if you break her heart again, I won’t hesitate to strap you to that backboard again and perform some surgery on your man parts.”

A sharp rap sounded on the door. A woman wearing multicolored scrubs popped her head in. “Dr. Rushford, security just pulled a cameraman out of our linen closet trying to make his way back here. The police from Deep River had to be called in to help control the traffic. And Millie thought she just saw Ryan Seacrest. Things are getting crazy.”

“All righty then,” Ben said, slapping Lukas on the arm. “I guess you’re discharged.”

“Look, you’ve got to help me get to Sam. Please.”

“Funny, I was just planning on throwing you to the lions.”

“Please, Ben.”

“Oh, fine. Who am I to stand in the way of young love?” Ben scratched his beard thoughtfully. “We may have to put you in a plaster body cast and haul you out on a stretcher to get past the media. Or maybe we can toss you in a hearse with a couple of the stiffs from the morgue.”

“Whatever it takes,” Lukas said with a grin.

“Well, for the record, I was kidding, but that’s the right answer. You’re all right, Lukas.”

Finally.

“Yes, Effie, I’m fine,” Sam said into her phone from her seat in the balcony section of the old theater. “Lukas’s bodyguards took me to get my car from the art museum but photographers were everywhere, so I let myself into the back entrance of the theater. Ben told me a bunch of them are still camped out in front of the Donaldsons’ driveway. He’s keeping Stevie with him and Meg tonight. But I’ll be okay sleeping in the office. I have some snacks in my desk.”

So much for spending the night with Lukas.

“Well,” Effie answered, “I hate to see you alone there in that big, dark theater with the town half run over with paparazzi. Let me send someone over to stay with you.”

“Too risky. I’ll be fine by myself.” She’d fallen asleep in the office plenty of times over the past few months. It even had a little couch. Being here didn’t scare her—how could it, when it was one of her favorite places?

The phone suddenly got muffled. There was rustling. She heard Effie’s voice in the background saying, “What was that, Ben?” More rustling, then Effie was back. “Oh, we ordered you a pizza. With
everything
. Side door, ten minutes. Enjoy!”

The line went dead.

This was the weirdest night ever. Yet Sam felt a strange sense of peace, despite the dinner being upended in the worst way. She hadn’t even stayed to do any damage control, so God knew how many of the donors would actually donate after tonight’s fiasco.

She did know Harris’s parents were not happy. Meg told her they’d left immediately after Harris punched Lukas, not wanting any association with the ruckus that ensued. They hadn’t even stayed to help their distraught son. That made her sad, but it also supported everything she’d expected, that the Buckhorns valued appearances more than anything.

Well, after tonight, she’d certainly blown any chance of ever ingratiating herself into that family. For some reason, that made her chuckle, the sound echoing across the vast rows of red velvet seats. She was sitting in her favorite spot, the front row of the balcony. The Moorish castle façade on either side of the stage basked in a beautiful golden glow, and she’d gone backstage and turned on the sky of twinkling stars overhead. One of the perks of knowing this place inside and out.

Funny, but she wasn’t sitting there doing what she would have typically done, obsessing about ways to soothe things over for Harris’s pragmatic parents or even for Harris himself, who had seemed a little brokenhearted. The semblance of security and safety and family values had brought her back to him after they’d broken up the first time, so long ago, but it wasn’t enough now to keep them together. Maybe she’d finally figured out those things were only an illusion with him.

While she was being brutally honest with herself, she also admitted she didn’t have to work at herself so much when Harris had made it so easy for her to dissolve into his big personality, his mission, his causes.

She’d given up her job for him, and she’d been willing to do whatever it took to help him get his career off the ground. Why hadn’t she seen the fact that he’d actually encouraged her not to get another job in Boston as a red flag? He was fine with advancing himself at her expense. She wondered if it was too late to get her job back, and made a mental note to talk to Joe Malone as soon as possible to find out.

Being safe, not risking anything, hadn’t got her what she wanted for her own life.

Be with me
, Lukas had said.

She was ready to take the chance. It felt right, in the sweetest, worst way. She couldn’t wait for them to be together, and she refused to think of anything beyond right now. Just then, her phone buzzed.
Lukas.

The shot of adrenaline that coursed through her made her fumble the phone and she nearly dropped it off the balcony. “Hello?” She looked around, half expecting him to somehow magically appear.

“Pizza’s here. But it got a little wet.”

“What . . .” She turned around. There he was, walking down the side aisle from the top of the balcony section, making his way toward her, a pizza box in one hand and a big bundle slung over his shoulder. She thought she recognized Tom’s old thermal silver minus-twenty sleeping bag, compliments of Effie, no doubt. As he emerged from the darkness, she saw a bottle of wine in his other hand. He was wearing green Mirror Lake Hospital scrubs. And he was completely soaked.

He handed her the pizza. A slow, steady grin spread over his face.

She couldn’t help smiling back. “It’s pouring out there,” Lukas said. “But the good news is, I don’t think anyone followed me.”

“Great.”
He
was great. They stood there for a moment, just looking at one another, grinning dumbly, until finally she said, “There better not be peppers on there or I’m totally making you return it.”

Effie knew damn well she liked her pizza plain. Clearly Lukas was the
everything
Effie was talking about.
Her
everything.

She started to tear up, so she made a big show of checking out his face. His nose was swollen and bruised, and he had another bluish swelling on his forehead. All she wanted to do was dive into his arms and kiss him all over, tell him how glad she was that things had happened as they did and now they could finally, finally be together. But suddenly she felt nervous and shy. “How did you . . . how did you get in? If you got in, someone will just . . .”

“Ben gave me scrubs and a surgical hat and got some off-duty paramedics to bring me here. And Effie gave me a key.”

Effie.
Of course.

He touched her cheek. “You okay?”

“I am now that you’re here.” To her embarrassment, more tears welled up. Before she could brush them away, he set down all the stuff he was carrying and wrapped his big, strong, inked-up arms around her. Like she hadn’t felt them in six long years.

His fingers tangled through her hair and suddenly his mouth was on hers, and oh, the feel of that mouth, kissing her like they’d never been apart and like there was no tomorrow, and not a second could be wasted.

For now, that was all the security she needed.

“I have to tell you something.” Lukas was brushing back her hair, caressing her face, and it was so hard to focus on what he was saying.

“What is it?” she asked, reveling in his presence, his heat, the freshly showered, soapy, delicious smell of him.