This Too Shall Pass (29 page)

“Is my dad going to live here now?”

“Hmm, I don’t know. Do you think he should?”

“Yes, because you keep having more babies. You need some help.”

Alexis laughed and hugged her tighter. “I have you for that. Do you want to read your book?”

“No, Aunt Sam already read it to me. I want Kinley to stay here.”

“In your bed? She might fall out.”

“No she won’t, she’s by the wall. I want her to.”

“I’ll see what daddy says. Can I go take a bath now? You’re good?”

“Yeah, tell my dad to come and tuck me in, too.”

“Okay, night sweetie. I love you.”

“Night, love you, too.”

Alexis descended the stairs, feeling the pain of every step. Checking on both babies, sound asleep in the same swing, Alexis told Cory to go to Riki and went to the bathroom downstairs.

Everything was set for a nice long soak in strawberries and cream bubbles until Cory came waltzing in like he owned the place.

“You can’t just barge in the bathroom,” Alexis said, annoyed. Who the hell did he think he was? Cory ignored her and shut the water off.

“Sorry, I had a feeling this is what you were doing. You can’t get in there.”

“In where? What are you doing?”

“In the water. You can take a shower, but you can’t soak in the tub.”

“Why? I did it all the time after I had Kinley.”

“You didn’t have surgery with Kinley. You can’t get in there. Can I see your incision?”

“You’re not my doctor.”

Cory smiled at the stubborn streak and sat on the toilet, pulling the bottom of her shirt to come to him. There was nothing sexual about it, but it still stirred emotions she hadn’t had in a while. “Stop,” he ordered playfully. First he released the wrap band, suffusing her relief, and then he removed the tape. The gauze was stuck half way toward the incision, and he stopped. “Go ahead and get a shower, let it get wet, but keep the soap out. Yell for me when you’re done, and I’ll come in and take care of it.”

Alexis stared down with an unsure gaze, nodding in agreement. Cory stood, holding the gaze and sidestepped her. An audible breath was released when the door closed behind him. Was she ready for this? Could she forgive him and get past the last nine months of hate and animosity? Those were the thoughts running through her mind while hot water rained over her body.

Alexis did let Cory take care of cleaning the incision. She laid on the sofa with her shirt up while he doctored her up, quiet stillness filling the air. Presley broke the awkwardness with a squeaky cry, affirming her hungry belly. Smiles were exchanged as Cory took her hand to help her up. He handed her Presley and then sat in the chair across from her with Paisley. Alexis covered herself with the receiving-blanket and lifted her shirt.

“Don’t hide from me, Lex,” Cory quietly requested in soft tone.

Alexis snorted and looked down to Presley latching on, but she didn’t uncover her nursing. “You don’t get that right, Cory.”

“I can understand that. I’m sorry, Lex.”

“Yeah, I know. Let’s not do this.” Alexis turned her attention to her baby and away from Cory’s intimidating eyes. Although she knew this conversation was coming, she wasn’t ready to have it.

“Do you want to go up to bed? I’ll carry the little ones for you.”

“No, you can sleep up there. I think I’ll stay down here with them.”

Cory didn’t sleep upstairs either. What little he did sleep was in the recliner. Alexis was the same. What little she slept was done on the sofa. No other words were exchanged about anything other than what needed to be said, the babies. That’s it.

Cory was sound asleep with the chair reclined with his hands tucked behind his head. Alexis was woken around two in the morning when she tried to roll over. The pain was immediate, taking her breath as she tried to sit. It settled when she sat up, holding a pillow over the incision. The fire was burned to a low flame, needing wood. Alexis thought about it for a second, but thought better of it. It wasn’t worth the pain. The crackling fire was the only noise she heard. Mr. Dog’s quiet whisper should have been heard as well. Her eyes went to the empty rug and her heart hurt. Thoughts of everything under the sun crossed her mind. All the things Cory had said and done to her over the past few months, Mr. Dog, and her dad. Sam and Doug, Bernie, and then more of her dad. He didn’t even get to see the babies. He would have been so in love.

“Are you crying, Lex?”

“My dad never got to see them. He’s never going to know how special they are. I almost didn’t have them. I almost killed all of us. Mr. Dog isn’t going to protect them. I can never trust you again.” Word that made little to no sense poured out of her mouth with every tear and they continued when Cory came to her side, holding her close. Alexis cried in the crook of his neck, letting go of months of bottled up emotions. Cory didn’t say a word. His lips stayed planted on her forehead while she cried, spewing everything she wanted to say, but didn’t. By the time she’d finished, her eyes were puffy and her tears were dry.

“I don’t know how to make it right, Alexis. I know, I’m sorry isn’t going to do it, but I am. I am so sorry. I wish you would have slapped me and told me the truth.”

Alexis snickered a little. “I did slap you.”

“I love you. I love you so much, and not one day did that ever change. I thought about you daily.”

“But you were a dick. You did and said things that I don’t know if I can get past.”

“I know, but that was the only way I knew how to handle it. I felt like you broke us.”

“And I think you broke us. You had every right to be pissed, but I didn’t deserve that.”

“I know you didn’t, Lex. Like I said, there is nothing I can do to change it. I can however promise to never ever do it again. I miss us. I want us. I want this. Our family.”

“It’s going to take more than that, Cory. A big part of me wants to tell you to go to hell, live my life for me and these four little girls.”

“My God, four girls. How the hell did that happen?”

“I’m being serious.”

“I know you are and I can’t blame you one bit, but I hope you don’t do that. I want to be a part of not only their everyday life, but yours as well. I want to go to bed with you and wake up to you every day for the rest of my life. Please want that, too. I’m begging you to want that, too, Lex.”

“I need time.”

Paisley squirmed with a squeak and then Presley, both with hungry little bellies. “Until the babies are fed?” Cory joked. He kissed her forehead and got up to retrieve the girls, holding one while the other nursed. That didn’t last long. Paisley wanted to be fed too. Alexis had it all figured out before she left the hospital. She tucked one under her arm and the other one across her midsection, generating two happy babies. Alexis didn’t hide herself from Cory that time. She held his gaze and leaned into his hand when he brushed her cheek with it. Maybe her dad was right. Maybe this would pass as well. Maybe things would be okay. One thing was for sure. A weight felt as though it had been lifted from her shoulders. Maybe, just maybe things would finally go in the right direction.

Fourteen

The next six weeks were a lot of trial and error. Getting used to having two new babies, an almost two year old needing lots of jealous attention, Riki, and learning where she fit in with Cory was trying. Alexis spent a lot of evenings crying over the loss of her dad, and she was thankful he was there. They did laugh and flirt, but never spoke of anything more permanent. Alexis literally spent two weeks at home, not leaving the house for anything. If it hadn’t been for the twins needing to go for their two week check-up, she probably wouldn’t have left then either. Cory took care of the grocery shopping and taking Riki to the bus. She had visitors, Bernie on several occasions, and her family, but mostly stayed home with all her babies, loving every second of it.

“You ready? The babysitter is here,” Cory informed her from her upstairs bathroom. “Whoa, you look hot.”

“Jeans! I’m so excited for jeans,” Alexis boasted, happy to be in real clothes, happy about a lot of things. She felt good. Things were going in a direction that felt right for the first time in a very long time. Cory moved toward her while she applied mascara, moving in right behind her. He kissed her neck and she pushed him with her elbow, staring at him through the mirror.

“You’re the prettiest mama I know.”

Alexis smiled and turned in his arms. Cory kissed her, parting her lips with his tongue and then backed off. “Yuck, lipstick. I think I smeared it a little,” he teased while his thumb swiped the corner of her lip.

“You can smear my lipstick anytime you want. Just don’t smear my mascara.”

“I promise. Now let’s go, the babysitter is here.”

“Sam, you can just say Sam.”

Cory led her away by her hand. “It’s not Sam though. Come on.”

Alexis pulled back, stopping Cory from going any further. “What do you mean? I’m not leaving them with Bernie. The last time I did that she let them have ice-cream for breakfast.”

“It’s not Bernie, don’t worry.”

Again Alexis stopped him with a pull. “Who? We’ll just take them. I don’t like this.”

Cory turned and kissed her lips with a smile. “Trust me. You’re going to love this one.”

“What did you do? See, this is why we can’t be together. You do stupid shit.”

Cory laughed and dragged her to the steps. “Oh my, God. Ellen? What are you doing here?”

Ellen met them at the bottom of the steps and hugged her. “You sure you just had two babies? You look great. How are you?”

“I’m doing well. How are you? What are you doing here?”

Ellen shrugged her shoulders with a smile. “Cory here tells me that he has an empty house in town. Seems he needs a sitter. I thought I’d come and help him out a little.”

“Seriously? You’re going to move here?”

“Only if you let me move back in here,” Cory replied.

Alexis gave him a sly grin and nodded her head toward Ellen. “I could just let her move in.”

“Yeah!” Riki yelled. She liked that idea. Cory tossed her into the air and then had to do it with Kinley.

“I haven’t been able to get him to leave in weeks anyway,” Alexis admitted to Ellen while staring at Cory.

“Let’s go. The twins are going to want to eat by the time we get there, and Dr. Dalton gets pissed when we’re late.” Cory ordered. He scooped up both baby seats, and Alexis grabbed the diaper bag.

“You two be good for Ellen. Maybe we’ll go out to eat tonight,” she suggested with a peck to each little cheek.

Cory buckled the girls in and opened Alexis’s door for her, stopping her with a kiss.

“Oh my, God, Cory,” she exclaimed when he moved into the driver’s seat.

“What?” he asked alarmed with eyebrows pointing to his nose.

“We need a minivan. We are never going to be able to go anywhere together.”

Cory laughed. “Hmm, yeah, that’s a good point. I’m not trading my truck. You gotta trade this.”

“That’s not fair.”

“I’ll let you drive it.”

“Okay, deal. I’d look pretty good driving this thing.”

“You would look pretty good driving a minivan,” Cory assured her with a sideways, sexy, grin. Alexis knew where things were going. All the signs were there and things had started to once again heat up between them. A lot of touching and kissing, but never making it to that third base. Alexis almost begged him just a couple days before. All four girls were sound asleep. Watching a movie turned into a make-out session and moaning. Moaning turned into grinding and Cory backed off. Alexis knew he was trying to prove something to her, but he didn’t have to. She knew there were things that needed to be said, things that needed to be talked about, but it never came up, both afraid of breaking the fragile glass they walked on.

Just like the past six weeks, Alexis changed the subject, not wanting to rock the boat and screw up the happy day. She didn’t want to talk about anything real, and she didn’t care if they ever did. Maybe they could just pretend for the rest of their lives. That seemed to be working for them.

“I’m not letting them get shots. They don’t need shots,” Alexis assured Cory. Talking about the kids was safe.

“You can turn your head.”

“They’re going to cry.”

“They cry all the time.”

“Not because someone hurt them. I don’t want go. Let’s not do it.”

“Give me your hand.” Alexis placed her hand in Cory’s and he kissed the back of it. “You’re a very good mother. I’m so happy my girls have you.”

“I still don’t want to hurt them. I’ll cry. Turn around.”

Of course Cory didn’t turn around, but it wasn’t so bad. Presley cried for two seconds and Paisley barely grunted. Once the girls were given a clean bill of health, Alexis was given hers.

“You’ve probably already resumed your normal bedroom activity since you had a C-section, but if not, you’re free to do so and return to work.”

That last statement caused so many feelings. So many thoughts ran through her mind and Alexis suddenly felt nervous. Like she had the first time she knew they were going to have sex. A glance was exchanged, but that was about it. No words were spoken about it. There was however lots of touching and flirting. Even in the grocery store. Cory pushed the two babies while Alexis pushed the cart with groceries.

“You know I’m never going to be able to take my kids and go to the store, right?” Alexis said with more of a statement than a question.

“We can buy a bus. We’ll be like that Duggar family. Four kids and counting.”

“Ha, you’re a funny guy.”

“We could be four girls and counting. We’ll just keep having girls,” Cory said from behind.

“Are you hearing what you’re saying? You’re already going to have four teenage girls. Four teenaged, hot, boy crazy, hormonal teens. I don’t think you get the magnitude of that.”

“Maybe Ellen should be the one to move in with you.”

Alexis laughed while Cory moved around her, reaching the box of Graham Crackers for her. Alexis looked back and gave him a quick peck on the lips. On accident of course. Her mind sure as hell didn’t do it on purpose. She wasn’t even thinking about that.

The entire day was spent with Joy and happiness. Cory did take them out to eat. All of them. It was only pizza at the local pizza shop, but it was fun. Bernie, Travis, Taylor, Sam, Doug, Paige and her new boyfriend, Finn, Jim and Amanda, and even Lola, along with all four Baker girls. The cold hearted truth about the minivan was certain. Taking two vehicles every time they wanted to go somewhere as a family wasn’t going to be an option. It sucked, but it did give Alexis a little time alone with her mom. They drove with the twins and Cory took his truck with Riki and Kinley.

The day was perfect, the twins were sweet as could be, just like Riki. It was Kinley who was going to be the little monster. She screamed for what she wanted and then threw herself on the floor when she didn’t get it. In public or not. Normally they just walked away from her and let her throw her tantrum until she calmed down. That didn’t work in the pizza shop. Kinley didn’t want the juice in her cup. Stupid Bernie let her taste her Pepsi. Kinley wanted Pepsi. The entire family laughed at her, even Cory laughed. Kinley didn’t cry for Pepsi. She couldn’t say it. She wanted pussy. Alexis gave it to her to keep her from crying for pussy in the middle of the restaurant.

“You got your mini me, right there,” Lola assured Alexis. “That little girl is a spitting image of you. She might have the Baker name, but she’s got the spine of a McKinley. That right there is going to be your trying child. She’s going to have your strong will and Sam’s wild streak. You watch.”

“Hey, I wasn’t a bad kid,” Sam protested.

“I didn’t say you were bad, just very precocious. You had to learn everything the hard way.”

“I still do,” Sam admitted with adoring eyes to Doug. Alexis smiled the same admiring smile toward her sister, happy they were working it out.

“What would you say if I told you Ellen was going to take your job?” Alexis questioned. They hadn’t really talked about it since Sam ended up not taking the apartment that she’d spent so much time and money on. Alexis just assumed she would step back into the Aunt slash babysitter role. 

Sam looked at Ellen and then to Doug again. “I would say Ellen is a blessing in disguise. I was wondering how I was going to tell you I quit.”

“You were?”

“Yeah, Doug bought a motorhome. We’re going to do some sightseeing.”

“You are? A motor home?”

“Hey, maybe that’s what we should get, Lex,” Cory suggested while taking Presley from her seat. Alexis followed suit when Paisley started to fuss, too. She covered herself with a blanket, nursing Paisley while Cory rocked and patted Presley. Feeding them both at the same time was hard enough at home. Presley could wait a minute.

They had such a good time together they were practically run off by the waitress, wanting to close up. It had been a while since Alexis felt this happy and secure. The only thing missing was her dad, which she tried not to think about, not wanting to ruin her mood. Cory helped with all four girls, making sure everyone was safely secured and then parted ways with Alexis and the twins.

Cory helped Lola in and then opened Alexis’s door. “I’ll see you at the house.” The kiss was supposed to be quick, not erotic. Alexis tangled her fingers in Cory’s hair and pulled him to her. She was the one who forced her tongue between his lips. Jesus. What the hell was wrong with her?

“Be careful,” she whispered as their lips broke contact.

“I don’t know if I can now. Geesh. Get out of here before I throw your ass on the hood of this car.”

Alexis laughed on his lips. “Yeah, don’t do that. My mom would pray for us.”

Lola talked to Alexis about how happy she was that Alexis had her shine back. “Your daddy is smiling. I’m sure of that. You don’t know how much that man worried about you.”

“Yes I do. I wish I could go back and change it all.”

“Well, you can’t. Move on. I think you’re doing the right thing. I don’t think you would be this happy if you weren’t, and those babies need a daddy. At home! Not a weekend dad.”

“I’m so afraid of jumping back into this with him, Mama.”

“Love hurts, life hurts, and if you go through it avoiding the things that make you happy in fear, you’re not really going to live. Jump in the water Alexis. Head first. Take a chance. You’re going to get hurt. You think I went through all those years with your father without getting hurt? They go hand in hand.”

“Dad loved you more than anything on earth.”

“That he did. And so does Cory. Sometimes they just don’t get it though. They handle things different than women. I’ve forgiven your dad so many times I lost count. You know why? Because they don’t count. They don’t matter. It’s passed. Let it pass, Alexis. Love hard and be loved.”

“You sound like Dad,” Alexis admitted with a smile.

“That’s because he’s right here,” Lola said while placing her fingers over her heart.

Alexis thought about her mother’s words of wisdom while she drove home, but only briefly. She was about to have sex with Cory. That took precedence over her mom’s philosophy on life.

Cory met her in the drive, ready to retrieve the infant-seats. Alexis carried the diaper bag and walked up the steps in front of him. “I got beer. Do want to drink a couple?”

Alexis looked over her shoulder to Cory’s strong muscles, bulging from two baby-seats in each arm while she thought about it. She stopped and turned toward him before opening the door. “Not really. I sort of had other plans.”

“Do they include me?”

“Oh yes. Very much so.”

Ellen already had the girls in the tub when they entered. Kinley was requesting pussy again and they both laughed, Alexis shaking her head, hoping she forgot about Pepsi real fast.

“Take them upstairs. I want to give them a bath, too. Do you think we should give them Tylenol?”

“I don’t think so. They’re not really fussy. Let’s wait.” Cory carried both babies upstairs and Alexis peeked in on the girls.

“How’s it going in here?”

“We’re having a slumber party with Ellen,” Riki informed her.