Thursday (Timeless Series #4) (16 page)

“Yeah. The other day we were talking and she asked me out. I told her I had a girlfriend.” His hands gripped my shoulders tightly, not allowing me to escape.

“She asked you out?” Now I was going to knock her out.

“Well, she didn’t ask me out on a date,” he said. “She just wanted to hook up.”

And that was supposed to make things better?

“So I told her I was with you. When she and I were fooling around she wanted a commitment but I didn’t want to give it to her. I think she was just surprised that I had a girlfriend at all.”

Now I was calming down—a little. “And why did you tell me about the two of you fooling around?”

He shrugged. “Because it happened. Aren’t couples honest with each other?”

Axel really had no idea what he was doing. “Honesty is good, yes. But giving more information than necessary is not. I didn’t want to know that you had a thing with Alexia.”

“What does it matter?” he asked. “She didn’t mean anything to me.”

“The idea of you touching anyone but me makes me sick.”

He grinned.

I slapped his arm. “You aren’t supposed to be happy.”

“Then what am I supposed to be? I’m confused.”

I pushed his arms down then gripped my skull. “Do I need to teach you everything?”

“You tell me.”

“Just filter your words, Axel. Don’t tell me stuff I don’t need to know.”

“But then I feel like I’m lying.”

“It’s not lying.”

Now he looked more confused than ever. “So, if we run into a girl I’ve slept with, you don’t want to know about it?”

“Precisely.” Honestly, I could figure it out based on their interaction.

“Okay…and you won’t get mad at me for lying?”

“It’s not lying.”

“So, you won’t be mad at me?”

“No, Axel.”

“Alright.” He lowered his hands to his sides. “So…are you going to keep running? Or are we okay?”

It was difficult to be mad at someone when his only crime was being naïve. Axel wasn’t purposely hurtful. He just didn’t know anything about women—or relationships. “Yes. We’re okay.”

He returned his arm around my waist and guided me back into the conference room. “Okay. I won’t tell you about all the other workers I’ve slept with.”

I sighed in irritation but didn’t say anything. Maybe one day he would get it.

***

We sat at a table with our glasses of wine in front of us. Some people were dancing and others were mingling. Every time I saw a pretty girl I wondered if Axel had already been with her.

Axel rested his hand on my thigh and glanced at me every few minutes, clearly checking to see if I was having a good time. “We’ll stay for another hour then we’ll go.”

“Okay.” When I looked across the room I thought I saw someone I knew. But there was no way it was really he. I must be imagining things, but then again, why would I hallucinate someone I hardly thought about?

“What?” Axel noticed the way my thigh tensed under his hand.

“That’s not Hawke, is it?” I nodded toward the bar where a man who looked similar was talking to the senior partner of the firm. It couldn’t be him. He left the firm without putting in his two weeks, and it didn’t make sense for him to care that his boss was leaving.

“Uh…” Axel narrowed his eyes. “It looks like him but that can’t be possible.”

I waited for my hallucination to pass but it never did. Hawke was still there, his dark hair exactly the same as it used to be. His suit was a little loose like he lost some unnecessary weight. His eyes were crystal blue like they’d always been. “I think it is him.”

“But why would he be here?”

“Was he close to your boss?”

“Not that I recall.” He rose from the chair and pushed it in. “Come on.”

I trailed behind him with my eyes trained on Hawke. The closer we got to him, the more I realized I wasn’t making it up. It truly was him, standing just feet away.

When Axel reached him, Hawke halted his conversation. He turned to Axel and stared at him silently before he returned his look to his boss. “Excuse me for a moment.” He stepped away with Axel while I went with them.

Hawke stopped when we were out of earshot of everyone else. He stared at Axel like he didn’t know what to say or how to even begin.

“Dude, why are you here?” Axel asked. “And why didn’t you tell me you were coming to town?”

“Mr. Thomas personally invited me. Since he gave me such a nice recommendation even though I left at the drop of a hat I couldn’t refuse.” He placed his hands in his pockets, quiet and secretive like always. “I assumed you wouldn’t be here so I didn’t say anything.”

“Why wouldn’t you want me here?” Axel asked, clearly hurt.

“It’s not that I didn’t want to see you.” Hawke kept his voice low. “I just didn’t want anyone to know I was in town…”

I knew whom he meant by
anyone
.

“I thought it would be easier if I just came and went.” Hawke had an apologetic look on his face, remorse for hurting his friend. “Sorry. I thought you hated these work things.”

“I do,” Axel said. “But I wanted to show off my girlfriend—” He halted in midsentence when he realized what he said.

Hawke smiled, and it was one of the few I’ve ever seen. “I’m glad you finally went for it.” He turned to me and gave me a hug. “Axel would always talk about you when he came to the city. I’m glad he got over himself and finally asked you out.”

Axel talked about me? That made me feel warm inside. “Yeah…”

Hawke lowered his hand then nodded to the table. “Should we sit? They’re serving dinner soon.”

“Yeah,” Axel said. “We have a lot to catch up on.”

***

Hawke took a sip of his wine then pointed at the two of us. “So, how did this happen?”

Axel turned to me, silently asking if I wanted to tell the story.

I shrugged. “He’s your friend. I’m sure your version is better.”

Axel turned back to Hawke. “Well, you knew I thought Marie was hot as hell.”

“Yes.” Hawke said it in an amused way. “It came up.”

“Well, we hooked up,” Axel continued. “Best sex of my life.” He spoke loudly, forgetting the people sitting around us.

“Shh.” I placed my forefinger over my lips.

“Whatever,” Axel said. “Everyone here knows what I’m like.” He continued on and ignored my advice. “I started seeing Marie at the house more and more because I started spending more time with Frankie…” He faltered when he mentioned her name.

Hawke didn’t react but his eyes lost some of their light at the mention of her. “I remember that too.  You said you were falling for her.”

He said that? I couldn’t picture Axel ever saying that.

“Well, I didn’t put it like that,” Axel said.

“But you didn’t want to sleep with anyone else.” Hawke turned to me and gave me a truthful look, telling me he wasn’t making that part up.

“Well…yeah.” Axel seemed embarrassed by all of this. “Anyway, Marie started dating this guy and I didn’t like it. I always felt sick when I saw her with him. And when I saw her kissing him on the doorstep…a small part of me died.”

“Awe…” I couldn’t keep the gasp from escaping.

Axel carried on. “We talked about it and realized it wasn’t going to happen. I wasn’t ready for a relationship and it would be weird for Francesca if we started dating, especially if we broke up down the road. It just wasn’t working so we went back to being friends.”

Hawke listened to every word he said, ignoring everyone else at the table. “That didn’t last long, huh?”

“Then she started dating this other dude, a total loser—”

“What?” I snapped. “You didn’t even meet him.”

“I didn’t need to,” Axel argued. “He wasn’t good enough for you. Nobody is.”

My eyes softened all over again. “Awe…”

“Marie accused me of being shallow,” Axel explained. “She had a thing for me in high school but I didn’t notice her until recently. She had a point. All I really care about is beauty. I’ve never bothered to get to know a girl before…”

Hawke listened attentively, his own thoughts hidden away.

“But I noticed things were different with Marie. When I wasn’t with her I thought about her. I noticed all the little details she had, like the way her hair fell around her face when she turned, and the little freckles on her skin…just stuff like that. When I wasn’t with her, I missed her. All I ever wanted to do was be with her—and I didn’t want to sleep with her.”

Hawke kept his fingers wrapped around his glass.

“So, I told her how I felt—that I wanted her for the good stuff on the inside and not the outside.”

Hawke nodded when the tale was over. “That’s sweet, Axel.”

“I mean, I do care about what’s on the outside,” Axel said. “I think Marie is sexy as hell. I’m not going to sugarcoat that.”

Hawke chuckled. “Physical attraction is important.”

“And we aren’t lacking,” Axel said, putting his arm around my shoulders.

“I always knew you would settle down,” Hawke said. “I’m glad I got to witness it.”

“Whoa, hold on.” Axel pulled his arm away. “Who said anything about settling down? We’re just dating.”

I didn’t let those words offend me. Our relationship was relatively new. We hadn’t even said we loved each other. But it did bother me—on some level.

Hawke chuckled. “You want my two cents?”

Axel shook his head. “Not really.”

“If you haven’t found a single woman you’ve wanted to be with until now—when you’re thirty—then you know you’ve found the one. Maybe you don’t realize it right this second but you will.”

Axel remained quiet, his thoughts hidden.

“When Francesca and I…I knew.” Hawke stared at his glass and didn’t make eye contact with either one of us. “There wasn’t a specific thing she did or said. One day you wake up and just know.”

I couldn’t believe he talked about Francesca like that, after he left her without looking back. He said they were never getting back together, but he talked about her like she was his one true love. It made no sense to me.

Axel didn’t say anything, probably having no idea what to say.

I kept my mouth shut because I had nothing nice to say when it came to Francesca. If he really loved her he would be with her right now. They’d be happy together and she wouldn’t be curled up in bed at this very moment.

Hawke stirred his wine and watched it dance. “How is she?”

It was a loaded question and I didn’t know how to respond.

Axel was quiet too.

“She’s great.” There was no way in hell I was going to let him know what a pathetic wreck she was. He wasn’t going to get that kind of satisfaction, knowing she still mourned him even after all this time. “She’s excited for the semester to end and to graduate.”

“Did she win that baking contest?” he asked.

What baking contest?

Axel took over. “She killed it—like always. Got a nice ribbon out of it.”

It must be one of the lies he made up. “And she’s seeing someone.”

Hawke looked up at that statement, the sorrow in his eyes. It was only there for a moment, and then like it never happened at all it disappeared. “I see…”

Axel shot me a glare.

“Yeah,” I continued on. “He’s a business major too. They worked on a project together and then he asked her out. It’s pretty casual right now but she seems to like him.” I couldn’t make it sound like she fell in love already because that just wasn’t realistic.

Hawke hid his despair but he didn’t hide it well enough. “Good for her…”

Even that wouldn’t make him go back to her?

“I was afraid she would break down and lose herself.” He stirred the wine again. “I’m glad she’s living her life to the fullest. I want her to be happy because she deserves the greatest kind of happiness in the world.” He stared at the wine before he took a long drink.

When he said things like that I didn’t hate him so much. Even though he left her it seemed like he still cared about her—even loved her.

“How are you?” Axel asked.

He finished the glass before he left it on the table. “Pretty much the same as the day I left. And I’ll always be this way until the day I die.”

Damn, he was intense.

Axel eyed him carefully before he spoke. “It’s never too late to get back together. Why don’t you—”

“No.” He held up his hand to silence Axel. “She’s doing great without me and I’m not messing with that.”

What? Did we just sabotage Francesca’s happiness? “Whoa, hold on. Just because she’s seeing someone doesn’t mean she’s over you.”

“I’m sure this guy is nice and he can give her the kind of future he deserves,” Hawke said. “If I walk into her life again it’ll disrupt all of that. I left for a reason and I have to stick with it. It’s the best for her.”

Goddammit.

“Dude, if you want to get back together you should at least tell her.” Axel panicked and didn’t even bother hiding it. He was playing it cool just a moment ago and now all his cards were on the table.