To Have the Doctor's Baby (15 page)

“Coffee would be great,” he said. “I can go—”

“No. You stay. I'll be right back.”

She walked out and took the elevator to the first floor. It was late and no meals were being served in the cafeteria, but drinks and snacks were available. On a red plastic tray, she put two cups of coffee, a couple bottles of water and sodas, along with chocolate chip cookies. Then she set it down by the cashier. After paying, she carried everything back to the waiting room.

When Ryleigh walked in Marilyn and David were talking quietly in the corner. She set the tray on the coffee table in front of them.

“Thanks.” The weary mom smiled.

“You're welcome.” She wished it could be more.

She grabbed the two steaming cups of coffee and walked over to where Nick was standing watch by the doorway, his body tense.

Holding one of the cups out to him she said, “This is probably the last thing you need, but here you go.”

“Right back at you,” he said, angling his chin toward the disposable cup in her hand. “You still look tired.”

“That would make sense since I haven't been to bed.” She shrugged. “I'm fine. Just so you know? You look tired, too.”

“Not as tired as they are.” He was staring at the mother and son and it was clear that not being able to fix their problem was eating him up.

“Do you have any idea what Jonathan's prognosis is?”

“Not really. I talked to the surgeon. The kid has a broken leg, but that's not the big problem. There's internal bleeding. Andrews has to find the source and repair it.”

“How long has he been in surgery?”

He looked at his watch. “About an hour.”

“Is that a long time?” she asked.

He shook his head. “Not really.”

“It probably feels like years to Marilyn and David.”

“Yeah.” He glanced at them, and there was understanding in his eyes.

“I'm sure they appreciate your support. Hospitals are scary to the average person. Having someone like you to run interference for them means a lot.”

He looked at her as if she had two heads. “So, you're not mad that I ran out on you?”

“No.”

It was on the tip of her tongue to ask why he would think that, but she already knew. That's how the old Ryleigh would have reacted. The immature, self-centered, in-the-adoration-stage-of-love girl she'd been would have been hurt and reluctant to share him. She was older and wiser now. She'd learned things about Nick that helped her understand him. This was where he belonged.

Intensity slid into his eyes. “Really, Ry, it's late. You should go on home. There's nothing you can do here. I've got this covered.”

“And who's got you covered?”

He frowned at her. “What?”

“Who's got your back?” she asked. “Who's watching out for you?”

“I'm fine.”

“Yes, you are.” She smiled at him. “And you act as if you don't need anyone. But that's mostly because you've never had anyone.”

“That's me. The lone wolf.”

“Very macho,” she agreed. “And it looks good on you. But we digress because you're trying to distract me.”

“Is it working?”

“Not even a little. I'm on to you, Doctor.”

“And just what is it you think you're on to?”

“Lone wolves need—” She was going to say love, but he wouldn't want to hear that. She'd broken the rules and gone over the edge, emotionally speaking. He'd made it clear he was unwilling to love her back, or simply couldn't take the chance. She wanted that so much, but things didn't always work out the way we hoped. That didn't mean she'd walk away from him again.

“What do lone wolves need?” he prompted.

“Someone to talk to.”

One corner of his mouth curved up. “I'm pretty sure wolves, either lone or in a pack, are incapable of speech.”

“You know what I mean.”

He leaned a broad shoulder against the wall beside the doorway. “Actually, I don't have any idea what you're talking about.”

“Then let me be direct. Something I haven't been very good at in the past.” She took a deep breath and met his gaze. “I can't make you love me again. And you can't make me stop loving you. But I will not leave you the way your father and mother did. I'm sticking around and I don't just mean right this minute. I'll be there for you whether you like it or not. No matter what.”

“Whatever you say.” The words were practiced, a standard response that indicated he was employing his finely tuned coping skills.

“I don't blame you for not trusting me. And that's okay. I bailed on you once before. As you said, there's a price to be paid for our choices and this is mine. But in time you'll see that I'm not going anywhere.”

He ran his fingers through his hair and he got that look in his eyes. The same one he had when talking about how his brother died. “What makes you think I won't bail on you?”

“Because I know what kind of man you are. I believe in you.”

There were doubts in his mind. She could almost see him ticking them off. But before she could go there, a man walked into the room. He had dark hair, gray eyes and was wearing scrubs. He looked tired, too.

Instantly, Marilyn and David stood and walked over to him. Nick straightened away from the wall, and before anyone else could ask he said, “Jake, how'd the surgery go? How's Jonathan?”

N
ick felt Ryleigh move close; then her fingers slipped into his hand and squeezed. When Jake smiled, relief edged through him.

The surgeon looked at Marilyn who had her arm around David's shoulders. “Your son is going to be fine. I repaired a laceration in his liver. He lost some blood and will be sore, but the organ is one of the most resilient in the body. He's young and strong—”

“And strong-willed,” Nick added.

“That's good.” Jake nodded. “His prognosis is excellent. Barring unforeseen complications, he should be good as new.”

“Oh, thank God.” Marilyn put a trembling hand to her mouth, then squeezed her son. “When he's recuperated, I'm grounding him for the rest of his life.”

“I'm sure he's learned a lesson,” Jake said.

“When can we see him?”

“He's in recovery and should be waking up soon. There's a waiting room right outside. I'll have one of the nurses bring you in when he's ready.”

“Thank you, Doctor. The words seem so inadequate, but I've never meant them more in my life.”

“You're welcome. I'll see you in a few minutes.” Jake nodded, then walked out.

Nick gave Ryleigh's fingers a squeeze before letting her go so David could give him a high five. Then the boy threw himself into Nick's arms.

“Thanks.” Emotion was thick in his voice.

A lump in his own throat, Nick cupped the back of his head before ruffling the kid's hair. “For what?”

“Being here.” David looked up, tears in his eyes. “I just knew it would be okay when you came.”

“Dr. Andrews is the man of the hour.”

“Yeah, he did good. But you—”

“David's right. You kept us steady. Sometimes his asthma flares up when he's anxious, but that didn't happen.” Marilyn hugged him. “You didn't have to, but I knew you'd come. That made all the difference. I could be strong for both my boys.”

“I'm glad.” He watched them walk to the waiting room doorway. “I'll check in on you guys in a little while.”

She nodded. Then they were gone and he was alone with Ryleigh.

When Nick looked at her, she was brushing away the moisture on her cheeks. “Are you crying?”

“I love happy endings.” Her voice trembled with emotion. “And you, Doctor, are such a knight in shining armor.”

“But I didn't do anything,” he insisted.

“You simply cared. The merits of that in terms of that
medical benefit can't be quantified.” The last word came out through a yawn she couldn't hold back. “Sorry.”

“That's it. Time for you to stand down.” There were circles under her eyes, giving her a fragile look that made him want to wrap her in his arms and keep her safe.

“Okay,” she said. “If you're sure you don't need me.”

Of course he needed her. That was the hell of it. He hadn't really understood how much he needed her until she was gone. And she'd gone because he pushed her away.

Something shifted between them; he could feel it. But hope didn't come easily to him. In spite of the sincere speech about loving him and sticking around, he always prepared for the worst, in this case, the worst being that he was losing her all over again.

“Go get some rest.”

“Okay.” She stood on tiptoe and kissed his cheek, then left the waiting room.

Nick was alone. He should be used to it, but Ryleigh had changed that. The fragrance she'd left behind seemed to mock him. So he would do what he always did. Hide behind work. On his way to the recovery room he rounded a corner and almost literally ran into Carlton Gallagher. The other guy was in jeans and a black T-shirt, and had a stethoscope draped around his neck.

“Nick? What are you doing here? Did I get the call schedule screwed up?”

“No. The answering service passed on a message from Marilyn Matthews that Jonathan Negri was here and needed surgery.”

“What? Why?”

“An accident. As scores go, it's car one, boy on bike nothing.” Nick added, “He's in recovery now. Jake Andrews says he'll be fine.”

Gallagher looked more and more surprised, clearly
understanding that Nick wasn't there to treat a medical emergency. “I say again, what are you doing here?”

Nick rubbed a hand over the back of his neck. “You first.”

“I'm looking in on a patient who came into pediatric emergency. He's got bilateral pneumonia and I wanted to make sure they get his temp down.”

“Always going the extra mile.”

Gallagher looked irritated. Or tired. Or both. “Okay, Nick, I know we have a philosophical difference regarding the emotional component in practicing medicine. We tried working together and it didn't work. Maybe we should just give it up. No hard feelings.”

“Not so fast.”

“Why not?” The other man scowled, a change from the easygoing doctor. “I'm letting you off the hook. No harm, no foul. I'll bow out gracefully.”

“I'd rather you didn't.”

“Look, it's late and I'm in no mood for jokes.”

“I've never been more serious.” Nick smiled. “And that's saying a lot for me.”

“I don't understand.” Carlton leaned against the wall. He was definitely tired. There was a lot of that going around.

“You have an interesting style and I could learn a lot from you.”

“Like what?”

Nick folded his arms over his chest. “For starters, there's a portion of practicing medicine that isn't about tests, treatment and prescriptions. It's about heart.”

The other man smiled slowly. “I couldn't agree more.”

“Sounds to me like a good start for a medical partnership. You're just the guy I need and I don't want to lose you because I've been a pigheaded ass.”

“I couldn't agree more.”

Nick laughed. “I'll have my lawyer draw up a contract. Welcome to the practice, Doctor.”

Gallagher held out his hand, and they sealed the deal, then resumed walking toward the recovery room.

“So,” Carlton said, “to what do I owe this change of heart?”

“You can't change a heart when you don't have one.”

“That's bull. Something's going on with you, and if I had to guess, I'd say it's Ryleigh.”

“Don't go there,” Nick warned.

“Can't help it. I'm wired that way. You better get used to it. Unless you want to take back the partnership offer.”

“No.”

“Then what's up with you and Ryleigh?”

Besides his bargain to get her pregnant and failing? Too much information. But the guy was into feelings and had seen through his. It was easier not to deny it. “We're just going through a thing.”

“A thing?” Gallagher gave him a look. “A thing as in you really like her?”

“Maybe.”

“You're not so good with words, are you?”

Nick shrugged. “It's a flaw.”

“I couldn't agree more.” Gallagher grinned.

“I'm working on it.”

“Then start by telling her how you feel.”

“I messed up when we were married.” Nick remembered a mother's emotional gratitude just a while ago when she'd said words were inadequate. He knew exactly what she meant. Ry had said she loved him, but that didn't mean she would ever be his. “It's not likely she'll trust me again.”

“Meaning you're afraid to put yourself out there again.”

“You know, Carlton, career trajectory in a medical practice could be aborted when you call the senior partner a coward.”

“Yeah. I'm really scared.” His tone said just the opposite. “The thing is she cares about you and you care about her.”

A lot of people who supposedly cared about him had disappeared. “How do you know that, and what's your point?”

“I could tell the first time I met her and you wanted to rip my head off.” He held up his hand to ward off the protest. “You were jealous as hell. The point is you need to bare your soul to the lady.”

“You did not really just say that to me.”

“Yeah. I did. And here's why. We're pulmonologists. We treat kids with chronic lung problems, not only in a crisis, but to help them manage diseases in a way that will preserve organ function. We do that to give them the best possible quality of life. Same with you.”

“I don't get it.”

“Then let me connect the dots,” Carlton said patiently. “You're going through the motions of living. Unless you're honest with her, you've only got half a life.” He stopped at the double doors to the recovery room. “For what it's worth that's my diagnosis and treatment. I'm going to check on Jonathan. You coming?”

“In a minute.”

The other man pushed through the doors, but Nick held back. He hated like hell to admit it, but his new partner was right. To get what he wanted, he had to let go of his control and let Ryleigh in. It
was
a risk, but to not take it would mean he'd lose her for sure.

His professional life was falling into place with a new associate to share the load. It was just a bonus that Dr. Gallagher was a pretty good judge of character and had a knack for connecting dots.

He'd booted Nick in the ass and made him face what he'd known the minute he saw Ryleigh again. She was the only woman he had ever wanted. He'd been a pigheaded jerk and let her get away once, but no one, not even Gallagher, could say he didn't learn from his mistakes.

 

“You look terrible.”

“Thank you so much,” Ryleigh said. The next morning she sat across a hospital cafeteria table from her friend Avery. “It's really a confidence boost to start your day knowing you look like something the cat yakked up.”

“That's not what I meant and you know it. Someone got up on the crabby side of the bed this morning. Premenstrual tension?”

“Probably.” Ryleigh looked down at the dry English muffin and orange juice on her tray and her stomach did an unhappy little clench.

Avery didn't miss the reaction. “Are you feeling all right?”

“Yeah. A little tired. I was here at the hospital kind of late last night with Nick.”

“Something wrong?”

“Not with us. Just the usual. He won't let himself love me, but that's not news.” She sighed and willed herself not to be a whiner. “A patient of his, actually the younger brother of his patient, was hit by a car when he was on his bike.”

Avery looked concerned. “How is he?”

“Doing fine. The trauma surgeon fixed him up and he's going to make a full recovery. I'm sure between now
and the time he's a grown man, his mother will spend a fortune on hair product to cover the gray.”

“Sounds like it. But—” Avery looked puzzled. “That's not Nick's specialty. Why was he here?”

“Nick came to emotionally support the asthmatic older brother who is his patient. And I came to support Nick.”

Avery speared a piece of melon from her fruit salad, then popped it in her mouth and chewed thoughtfully. “That's different for him, isn't it?”

“What?”

“Well, from what you told me, he keeps an emotional distance from everyone, including his patients. He's like a car mechanic, only with people, little people.”

“It's a fact that children are not small adults and can't be medically treated the same.”

“I know.” Avery chewed and swallowed a strawberry before continuing. “What I'm saying is that when a car breaks down, the mechanic fixes the problem. But it's a car so there's no emotion involved. According to you, Nick never turned his back when needed, but always holds his emotions in check. He fixes kids and is an awesome doctor who acts like a mechanic.”

“I'm not sure it's an appropriate comparison, but essentially you're right.” Ryleigh broke off a piece of dry muffin and rolled it between her fingers. “There was no medical reason for him to be here last night. It was all emotion. Something about the two brothers got to him.”

“So something is changing with him. Any ideas what's going on?”

“Well, I told him I was in love with him.”

Avery's eyes widened. “That could start a chain reaction with the potential for emotional growth. It reminds me of the lyrics from a song…you know the one about how the
two people are not really friends, but then one changes when the other least expects it….”

“Not likely in our case. I told Nick that he didn't have to follow through on the baby bargain and I'd still always be there for him. It doesn't matter that he can't love me back.”

“That explains why you were here with him last night.”

“Exactly.” Ryleigh dropped the mangled piece of muffin on her plate.

“What time did you get back to his place?”

“Actually I stayed at my apartment because it's two minutes from the hospital and I was pretty tired. It was about eleven-thirty. Why?”

“Because you've got dark circles under your eyes and that's not really so late.” Avery studied the mutilated English muffin and orange juice. “Where's your coffee? You never met a cup you didn't like.”

“It just didn't sound good.” Ryleigh made a face. “The smell of it when I walked in here made my stomach turn.”

“Oh my.”

There was some kind of aha-I've-got-it expression on her friend's face, but Ryleigh was clueless. “What?”

“You're pregnant.”

Ryleigh froze and stared. Then she vehemently shook her head. “No way.”

“What no way? You've been having unprotected sex with Nick Damian.”

Ryleigh shushed her, then looked around at the sprinkling of hospital employees occupying nearby tables. “Say it a little louder. I don't think they heard you on the other side of the room.”

Avery bent closer and in a voice barely above a whisper
said, “Have you or have you not been sleeping with Nick?”

“Yes. But when we were last together I wasn't ovulating. We just barely missed my fertile time.”