Together We Heal (8 page)

“Easy there,” Max said, laughing at me.

“Well, if we hadn’t had to drive so far, I wouldn’t be so hungry,” I said, sticking my tongue out at him.

And then the lobster roll arrived and I almost started laughing. It was fucking huge. There was no way the two of us could finish it, as well as our salads and dessert on top of that. No freaking way.

“Just think of it as an adventure,” Max said as we stared at each other over the behemoth bun filled with several lobsters’ worth of meat.

“You know after we eat this, neither of us is going to be able to move. They’re going to have to roll us out to the car.” He just shook his head at me and dug in.

SO, THINKING YOU
can eat a foot long lobster roll and then actually doing it are two different things. We did pretty well, but we both hit a wall and even though there was only a little bit left, neither of us could do it.

“I think I’ve gained ten pounds tonight. I hope you don’t mind,” Trish said, rubbing her stomach.

“I’d love you if you were a thousand pounds,” I said and she gave me a look.

“No, you wouldn’t. Besides, I’m not sure if it’s actually possible for a person to weigh that much.”

After sitting and resting for a while after our marathon eating session, we got the rest of the roll wrapped up to go.

“Maybe we should get dessert to go?” Trish said, but I shook my head.

“I have a better idea.”

After a fight over me paying the check, which I won, we waddled out of the restaurant.

“Oh my Goooodddddd,” Trish said as she got into the car.

“Okay, on our next date, no giant food items,” I said.

“Agreed.”

WE GOT BACK
in the car and I kept driving south. I knew somewhere along the line we’d reach a late-night diner where we could get milkshakes or sundaes or something. I hit the jackpot an hour later and I escorted Trish in.

“We’re going back after this right? Because we’re going to have to drive over two hours to get home,” she said. I just shrugged one shoulder.

“Wait, we’re not going back after this?” she said, tugging on my sleeve. I ignored her and told the waitress that there were two of us. Trish kept talking to me as the waitress showed us to our table.

“Max, we’re not seriously going to keep going, are we?” I had to admit, I was enjoying seeing her so wound up. It was a shame that I hadn’t done this sooner. It was way too much fun.

“Just go along for the ride, hun,” I said, remembering not to call her baby. She started to protest, but I held one finger up.

“You said you were going to work on trusting me. This is one of those times when you’re going to need to trust me. I know it’s hard, but I’m not going to take you somewhere in the middle of the woods and chop you up with a chainsaw and then bury the pieces.”

“Gross.”

Because we were both feeling a little silly, we ordered one giant strawberry milkshake and two straws.

“I feel like I’m in a movie or something,” Trish said as we leaned forward and drank the thick deliciousness with our individual straws.

“Golly gee, you’re sure looking keen tonight,” I said with a wink.

“Oh, why Max, you sure are sweet. You know just what to say to a girl. Maybe later we can drive out to the sock hop.” She fluttered her eyelashes and we both burst out laughing.

“You’re such a dork,” she said.

“Dork is the new black, sweets,” I said, straightening my bow tie.

I COULDN’T REMEMBER
the last time I had this much fun. Sure, I loved hanging out with my friends and doing things with them, but this was on a whole other level. My face hurt from smiling. That had definitely never happened to me, like, ever.

Max seemed more open and free when we were on the road. He sang along with the playlist, which kept going as the miles increased. We passed through Maine into New Hampshire and I just stopped asking questions. It didn’t matter. Whatever we did, it was going to be a blast.

We had to stop for coffee and to pee a few times.

“I shouldn’t have worn this dress,” I said. It was a bit on the tight side and I wanted to just unzip it and put on something more comfortable.

“There’s extra clothes in the bag in my duffle,” Max said, pointing to the backseat.

“Why didn’t you tell me that until now? Jesus.” I reached in the back and grabbed the bag. Holy shit, he had tons of stuff in here. Several changes of clothes, toothbrushes, PJs. I was both shocked and impressed. Somehow he’d gotten these clothes without my knowledge.

“What the hell are we doing tonight, Max?”

“You’ll see,” he said.

I MADE HIM
stop so I could change into a t-shirt and jeans. He changed also and I took off the makeup.

“It was fun while it lasted,” I said.

“If you like it, wear it. If you don’t, don’t. Doesn’t matter to me either way,” Max said, messing his hair back to its normal level. It still boggled my mind that Max liked me exactly the way I was. I’d probably never figure it out.

Then it was back in the car for more driving. We passed through state after state and I ended up falling asleep. The next time my eyes opened, I heard Max’s voice.

“We’re here.”

It was nearly four a.m. I blinked a few times and finally realized where we were.

“Do you think you can get up and walk? We just have a little bit farther to go.” I nodded and got out of the car. My legs protested and I stretched my back a few times as Max got some more stuff out of the car. He’d really gone all out for this date. I didn’t know a whole lot of guys who would drive someone all night like this.

Putting the bag over his shoulder, he grabbed my hand. I’d switched out my heels for sneakers. It was pretty chilly, but not as cold as Maine.

“I’ve never been to Atlantic City,” I said as we walked through the nearly empty parking lot and toward the boardwalk.

“Me neither. But I always wanted to, so here we are,” he said. We made it down to the sand and then we found a flat-ish spot. Max spread a blanket out and pulled out some Pop Tarts and orange juice.

“You thought of everything,” I said as I sat down and he handed me one of the foil-covered Pop Tarts.

“I tried to. I wanted to make this first date epic. You know, raise your expectations so high at the beginning and then just disappoint you for every other date,” he said and I lost it laughing. I was tired and achy, but it didn’t matter. It also didn’t matter that it was going to take us nearly an entire day to get back to school. I had the day off tomorrow, so we were good, but still. This was quite the epic date.

We both uncapped our orange juice and clinked the plastic bottles together.

“To sunrises in Atlantic City,” he said.

“To epic boyfriends,” I countered.

IT TURNED OUT even better than I thought it would. We were both exhausted, so we lay back on the blanket. Trish cuddled into my chest and we watched the sun rise on the ocean. Life was a series of moments and this one, right here, was one of the best. I had my girl and she was happy and that was all I needed right now.

Since it wasn’t really even spring yet, the beach was pretty much deserted. Soon it would be dotted with tourists, but apart from the occasional jogger, we had the place to ourselves for now.

We both fell asleep for a little while. I was woken my phone ringing.

“Nooo,” Trish said, burying her face into my jacket.

“I agree,” I said, looking at the screen. It was my mom. I decided to let it go to voicemail. I’d call her back later. Hopefully it wasn’t an emergency.

She didn’t leave a voicemail, so I figured it was all good.

“Wanna walk around?” I said and Trish nodded. We were both awake now, despite our sporadic sleep. After going in search of coffee, we just wandered the empty boardwalk. Most of the shops were shuttered and looked sad and abandoned.

“We should definitely come here this summer,” she said and I totally agreed. There were plenty of corners where I could pull her aside and kiss her. She laughed and even let me slide my hand under her shirt. Just a little. I would punch myself in the face before I pushed her to do something she didn’t want to do. But then she pulled back and smiled at me and didn’t tell me to stop. So I brushed my fingers across her stomach a few times and took her hand again.

Best. Date. Ever.

After we sort of looked around, we mutually decided that it was time to drive back.

“This time I’ll take the wheel,” she said. I fought her on it, but I was so damn tired that I didn’t think I could drive really well, so I let her do it.

“So,” I asked as she pulled out and we started for home, “is this one of the best first dates you’ve ever had?”

“No,” she said, shaking her head. “It’s
the
best first date I’ve ever had. Thank you so much.”

“Thank you for trusting me and coming with me. You don’t know what it means.” I went ahead and hit the playlist for the mix I’d made for us and tilted the seat back. She sort of hummed along with the songs and between that and the constant rumble of the engine, I dozed off.

I DIDN’T WAKE
up until the car stopped and Trish was getting gas.

“Where are we?” I asked as I got out to stretch.

“Almost to New Hampshire,” she said. Wow. I’d really crashed there.

“Sorry for sleeping the whole way. I didn’t plan to be out that long.” I rubbed my eyes and yawned, my jaw cracking.

“No big. I don’t mind being alone.” I knew that, but it still made me feel guilty.

By the time we made it back to campus, we were both sick of being in the car.

“I want a shower and a nap. And pizza. I need pizza,” she said.

“I can help with all of those things,” I said as we went back to her room.

“Oh yeah?” she said, turning to face me as I set my bag down on the floor. I’d packed a bunch of extra clothes for myself. I had a few outfits at her place, but it would be easier if I had half my clothes here and half at my place.

“I’d really like to help you with the shower part,” I said, being bold. She studied me for a moment and I waited for her to roll her eyes and tell me I was being crude.

Instead, she took off her jacket, tossed it on the chair, gripped the edge of her baggy shirt and pulled it over her head.

My brain exploded.

Holy shit, my girlfriend was taking her clothes off. She gave me a few seconds to appreciate her beautiful skin, marked here and there with tattoos, and the black bra she had on before she stripped out of her jeans to reveal matching black lace panties.

I couldn’t take it. Couldn’t deal. Too much. Way too much. Too much skin, too many curves, too much beauty.

She stood there in front of me, her chin up as if daring me to criticize her. But I saw how her lip trembled a little and she did that thing where she shuffled from foot to foot.

“You’re incredible. I don’t even have words,” I said. She blushed. I honestly couldn’t remember a time she’d blushed before and damn, if that wasn’t the prettiest thing ever.

“I’m not perfect,” she said.

“Yes you are,” I said, but she shook her head. I’d had enough of her doing that, so I crossed the space between us and grabbed her shoulders.

“Trish. I know you don’t believe good things about yourself. But you are beautiful. You are kind. You are a wonderful, good person. You deserve to be loved. You deserve everything.” I let go of her shoulders and brushed my hands through her hair. It was still somewhat curly and I wanted to play with it.

She swallowed and her eyes were wide as she looked at me. I could tell she was looking for my lies. She always looked for the worst first.

“I want to believe you,” she whispered. “I want to believe I can be loved, but too much has happened.”

“What happened?” I murmured, brushing my thumbs across her cheeks.