Touch Slowly (Red Light: Silver Girls series) (22 page)

Shayla parked in front of her trailer. The driver and passenger door opened. His gaze went right to Nova. The lifted chin, the long stride, the toss of her hair over her shoulder as she walked his way rusted the steel down his spine. He swallowed the pleasure he received from her presence and prepared himself to let her go.

Shayla veered away and hurried up the steps to the trailer and shut herself inside. Nova stopped in front of him and put her hands on his sides and leaned in to kiss him. He held himself perfectly still against the onslaught of desire to return her kiss.

Nova pulled back and lowered her hands to her sides. "What's wrong?"

"Why don't you tell me," he said, balling his hands into fists in his pockets.

"Emmett." She laughed softly. "That's why I asked you because I don't know why you're not kissing me back. Is it because you're tired of going slow for me?"

The snort of disgust escaped him. "Just for your information, I respected you. I admired you. It was the best feeling in the world to meet a woman who seemed genuinely interested in me and had enough self-respect not to sleep with every fucking man she hangs out with. I thought you were different."

"Whoa." She frowned. "What are you saying?"

He looked away and slowed down before turning back to her. He couldn't help staring. Before he'd found her purse, he believed he had everything, and his good deed turned everything around. She'd stripped him bare, and he hated knowing he was the one who would end up hurt.

He had no fucking clue what he had with her anymore and everything surrounding him, his trailer, the park, his store, left him unfulfilled. All because he'd fallen in love with Nova Kinsley.

"I noticed your purse in the car this morning before work." He scoffed. "Thought I'd be a good guy and return it to you in case you needed it today."

Nova rocked back a step and caught herself on the heel of her foot. 'You came...?"

"Yeah." He stared her down. "I went to Federal Inn. You know what the woman at the check-in counter said? Hm?"

Nova shook her head. "Emmett—"

"Don't." His voice shocked the quiet of the night, and going by Nova's flinch, the harshness surprised her, too. "I'm not interested in any of your lies."

"Can you let me explain?" she said, her voice equally loud.

"So, you can tell me more lies?" He grunted. "It's a simple thing. The location of where you are staying while you're in Federal isn't fucking top-secret, Nova-girl."

The name he called her slipped out of his mouth before he could stop it. He turned and walked toward his trailer.

Nova grabbed his arm. "Let me explain."

"No." He lifted his hand to remove her hold on him. "You're not listening. I thought you were someone else. I thought you were honest with me. Get this through your head. I'm not interested in being jacked around. Tonight, ending it all between us sits on your shoulders, Nova. You're responsible because you decided to lie to me."

The door on the trailer next door slammed. He glanced over and found Nick and Shayla walking toward them.

"I'm done." Emmett shoved his hands back in his pockets, uninterested in having this discussion out in the open in front of his friends. "Go back to where you're from, Nova. I'm not interested in lies."

"I'm not staying at Federal Inn. I have never stayed there." Nova squeezed her eyes shut and opened them again to gaze at Emmett. "I'm living upstairs at the Sterling Building. There are rules I have to obey to remain living there. I'm not allowed to have visitors. That's why I meet Shayla under the viaduct, and I only come out after nine o'clock at night when I know I can sneak out of the room and escape off the balcony. That's the truth, Emmett."

Emmett lowered his voice. Her tears only amplified his loss. "Bye, Nova."

Shayla stepped up to her cousin, wrapped her arm around Nova's waist, and led her to the car. Emmett stood rooted to the spot watching the woman he thought was perfect leave his life. The ache in his chest squeezed harder.

The car left carrying what he'd hoped would be his future away.

Nick approached him. "Emmett, we need to talk."

He shook his head. "Now is not a good time, man."

"I think you made a mistake." Nick cleared his throat. "Do you know what goes on in the Sterling Building?"

Everyone in Federal knew about Silver Girls. Adult entertainment was too rich for his blood. He preferred to stay away from the jacked up prices they charged for a beer and refused to hand over his hard-earned money for a chance to slip his fingers inside a woman's g-string when he could look around the park, and half the women would let him touch for free. "It's the only titty bar in Federal. Of course, I know."

"No, I'm asking you if you know what is ran upstairs in the apartments above where the Silver Girls dance?" asked Nick.

He shrugged, not in the mood to talk about locations or intentions. Like most of the buildings in town, building owners rented out the small rooms above local businesses as a way to keep their business afloat. He had three renters of his own above the auto parts store. The point that Nova lied to him and kept lying was the fact he couldn't overlook.

"I've heard the owner of the building rents out the rooms upstairs in the Sterling Building to women who want to leave an abusive relationship. She gives them a safe environment for them to get back on their feet and help them move on with their life as they heal." Nick sighed heavily. "Nova never said a word to me about what she's gone through. Her or Shayla."

Emmett looked at Nick in horror. A man abused Nova? Had she come to Federal to escape a shitty relationship that put her in danger?

"I think we all fucked up," whispered Nick. "Nova should've come home to her family. If she...she should've come to me..."

Emmett doubled over and braced his hands on his knees. She'd never said a word to him about what she'd gone through before coming to Federal. He'd asked her outright if her personal reasons to wait to have sex with him had anything to do with a man hurting her in the past.

She'd said no.

She'd lied again.

And, she had a damn good reason to keep the truth from him. He straightened. Wanting to kill the man who hurt her, he removed his car keys from his pocket.

"Wait. Don't go off right now. Take a few hours to calm first." Nick stopped him. "You can't go storming in there. Like Nova said, there're rules for the women who live in the Sterling Building, you'd put them all in danger and do more damage than good. I also know that biker gang protects the place and are always around whenever I've driven down Cedar Street. Give her time to think about what you said, and you take the time to think about how you doubled her hurt. She's my cousin. Until I know what the hell is going on in my family, I don't want anything or anyone to upset her more. I can see you're hurting, man. I get it, I do. If Nova can think things through, she'll need you even more. Step up and do this for her."

"Damn." He removed his cap, ran his hand through his hair, and slapped his hat back on. He blamed her when he was the one who made the situation worse. "God damn."

"Why don't you come in the trailer. I'll get out the whiskey," said Nick.

He shook his head. "Thanks, but I need to get away from all this. I need to think. I've fucked tonight up, and I...I need to think."

The thought of someone putting their hands on Nova in anger or verbally abusing her sickened him. She deserved better.

She deserved better understanding and patience from him.

T
he mayor of Federal sat on the throw rug on the bed, his hands planted at his sides. Nova dipped her head, retreated, and plunged her mouth down again on his cock. The laborious breathing coming from him signaled the end of his fifteen-minute session with her.

He came in all business and shed his suit coat. She assumed he came from a meeting over lunch going by the formal way he dressed and the strong scent of garlic clinging to him.

With only one week left working at Red Light and her exit from the Network, she suspected the mayor would continue visiting the new set of ladies who would stay at the illegal bordello. She pegged him for a regular. Not much talk, and all business.

He groaned, and his thighs hardened under the heightened arousal she brought out in him. She sucked harder and received his release. In one push, she rose to her feet and stepped away for her robe. In all her twenty-six years, the week dragged on as if it would never end.

Even after her mom left promising to come back for her when the boyfriend found a place for them all to live hadn't affected her as much as when Emmett told her goodbye.

As a child, she'd held out unconditional hope that her mom would return for her. Mother's never left their children. Not good mothers, anyways.

Understanding Emmett finalized everything with one word broke something inside of her. She revisited old wounds over the last several days that she thought had healed after her mom's departure from her life. She thought any disappointment and heartbreak would pale in comparison to her mom abandoning her. She believed nobody could hurt her the way her mom had so long ago.

She was wrong.

She still had a heart, and that heart hurt her with each breath she inhaled.

"The wastebasket is by the door." She tied her robe. "If you feel like leaving a tip, there's a box on the shelf by the door."

The mayor halted and studied her closely. "Is everything okay?"

"Absolutely." She over-smiled to prove she was fine.

He straightened his tie and tucked his shirt over his rounded belly. "You seem off today."

"How so?"

He wagged his head side to side in thought. "A little of your edge is missing."

He was right. She'd lacked any kind of motive to put forth the effort it took to hold a superior position to the customers. What once came naturally, setting her apart from the other prostitutes and let her stay in control of her working conditions had left when Emmett cut her from his life.

She'd come to the realization that she'd taken a dominant position within the Network to protect herself when all she wanted was to be in a relationship where she felt cherished, loved, and slipped into the position of letting someone else take control, take care of her. She was tired of always being the one who stood strong in the face of hardships.

As a young girl, she learned to thrive on her own. During her teenage years, she looked out for herself, daring others to take care of her and tell her how to live by acting reckless and doing dangers activities, hoping if someone caught her running the streets and painting the town, they'd punish her. That way she knew what was expected of her.

That way the pain would come from someone else, and not from inside her.

In the only way she knew how to handle things, she'd forced Emmett not to fall in love with her by keeping him from having sex with her and knowing the truth. She feared losing him. When all she wanted him to do was stand up and tell her she couldn't leave, that he wouldn't leave, that she could do anything, and he'd forgive her.

She wanted to hear that no matter what happened or what she had done, he'd still love her.

"You're right." She mustered a more believing smile. "I'm always a little sad to leave when I've met so many incredible people here who have treated me with kindness."

The knock at the door signaled the end of his time with her. She glanced at Tiff standing in the open doorway and back to the mayor.

"Thank you," he whispered. "And, good luck."

She lowered her chin in acknowledgment. Everyone had something in their past to hide. The customer who visited a bordello for fifteen minutes out of their busy week or the prostitute who serviced the men. Even the auto parts store owner who found contentment settling down in a simple life.

Nobody had a right to judge someone else's choices because they lived differently.

Emmett would never understand her reasons for working as a sex worker. He'd judged her for what he couldn't accept.

The second the door closed, she took her phone out of the drawer and turned it on. Two missed calls and one text message. She pulled up the message.

––––––––

S
he set her phone down and walked into the bathroom and showered.

He'd called her the last two days and left texts on her phone that he wanted to talk. There was nothing more to say. He'd told her goodbye over one measly lie, and he still had no idea what she was doing in the upstairs of the Sterling Building. He called her out of pity and guilt over his assumption that she was an abused woman seeking shelter.

Once Emmett found out that she lied by omission the last time he believed she told the truth at the trailer park, she'd kill any feelings he once had for her.

She shimmied on her jeans and walked into the room and found out she'd missed more calls from Shayla.

She finished getting dressed and called her cousin back.

"Just calling to check in on you. Do you want to come over?" asked Shayla.

For the last week, she'd avoided going to the trailer park. She had a hundred percent chance of running into Emmett there, so she stayed at Red Light and spent her free time between hanging out with the ladies, lost in their senseless conversations, and in her room, feeling sorry for herself.

"Yeah, I'll come over. Can you pick me up under the viaduct at nine o'clock?" She walked over and removed her sneakers out of the closet.

"Sure." Shayla paused. "Does that mean you're going to talk to Emmett?"

"I don't want to, but I need to. I only have four more days to work, and I have to make a decision on what I'm going to do." She slipped her feet into a pair of Vans. "I haven't contacted the Network yet. I should've done that last week."

"You need to stay here with us. I'll help you find a house to buy if that's what you want, but you've been away from your family too many years. We all need each other. I need you."