Uncovering You: The Complete Series (Mega Box Set) (172 page)

The only solace I could find was that she could have been in no better place to suffer the attack. If she could have been saved, they would have done it. There were no ‘what if’s’ with her death. No uncertainty or second-guessing or regret.

She wanted to see me in my black graduation gown. So I wore it to her funeral. It was my way of saying good-bye.

That’s when I reconnected with Summer. Her parents were there. They told me how sorry they were for my loss and gave all the regular words of sympathy. But even if I knew they were genuine? The words felt hollow. They were no different from what people would have been telling my mother if our places had been switched.

I watched them lower the casket without shedding a tear, without showing a flicker of emotion. Only when I retreated to my crappy little motel room did I let the sobs come.

She wanted me to complete college. I did that.

I make a promise to myself right then and there that I was going to complete one semester of graduate school, at least. Fuck the cancer. I’d do it for her.

Summer bursts through the door. “Hey Celeste, guess what? I just got a—” She sees me. “Oh shit.”

Immediately, I sit up straight and try to make it look like I haven’t been crying. But the damn mascara’s probably leaked all over my face.

Summer’s voice goes an octave lower. “Celeste, what’s wrong?” She comes closer and sits on the bed. “What is it, honey? What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” I snivel. My voice cracks. “It’s stupid.”

Summer touches my knee. It’s a soft, caring gesture. “Tell me.”

I rub at my eyes. “Really, Summer, it’s… it’s nothing.”

“Celeste.” Summer fixes me with a firm but gentle look. “I’ve never seen you cry. It’s okay. You can tell me. Really.” She rubs my leg. “I want to know what’s bothering my bestie.”

I look away from her. “You just came in at a bad moment. My hormones are all over the place. It’s… it’s that time of the month, you know.”

“Celeste, you were
crying
. Something’s up. Don’t you trust me? I’m not going to force you to say anything you don’t want. But it’s good to talk about things. I can listen. Come on…” She softens her voice and gives me a little smile. “Try me. Tell me what’s up. Maybe I can help.”

“Thanks,” I say. “But it’s nothing you can really help with.” I try to stand up.

She doesn’t let go. “Celeste. Come on. I want to know. Tell me what’s bothering you. Tell me what happened. Is it that guy? Mr. Porsche?”

“God no,” I say. I manage a laugh. “I wouldn’t cry over a random guy.”

“So tell me.”

I sigh and look away again. My eyes focus on the clouds, far past the window frame.
I wish I could go somewhere far away
.

I turn back to Summer. “You really want to know?”

She looks across scandalized. “Of course I do.”

“Fine,” I mutter. “I… I was thinking about my mom.”

Summer’s face breaks. “Oh, sweetie,” she says, and wraps both arms around me in a hug.

I stiffen at first, feeling somehow uncomfortable with the show of affection when all I’ve given her is lie after lie after lie. But I’m in too deep. I can’t back out now.

So instead of resisting, I let her hug me. My arms even creep up around her.

“I miss her too, you know,” she tells me softly. “She was like a second mother to me.”

“I know,” I say.

Summer and I lived on the same block when we were girls.

“Remember that one time, freshman year in high school, when you and I were paired together in our home ec. class, and it was our turn to bake brownies for everyone at the end of the week? And you were so sick with the flu you couldn’t even get out of bed, but I still came over and we did it?”

“Yeah…” I say.

She shakes her head. “We didn’t. Remember how I screwed up the recipe and poured way too much flour into the batch, then tried to fix it by adding more butter, and then it became too watery, so I added
more
flour, then more butter, on and on and on?”

“Sort of,” I say. “But we stuck it all in the oven and the brownies came out great anyway. Didn’t they?”

Summer gives a secretive smile. “Not exactly. Everything burned and was awful.”

“No,” I protest. “Remember? We got top marks.”

“That’s because your mom rescued us. She went out and bought all the ingredients and redid the recipe. She even tweaked it a bit. That’s why they were so good. I think she was up all night baking them.”

“She did that?” I ask. “How come I didn’t know?”

“Because you were sick as a dog, obviously. I wasn’t supposed to know either, I don’t think. But I spotted the leftovers of our batch in the trash.” She shrugs. “Your mom saved us. We would have flunked otherwise. She was the best.”

“Yeah,” I say sadly. “Yeah, she really was.”

“Hey, you know what we should do?” Summer’s eyes light up. “You know what we should do, right now?”

“No.” I shake my head.

“We should go visit. It’s not far from here, the cemetery, and I—“

“Oh no, Summer,” I say. “We don’t need to do that. Really. Reminiscing is enough.” I stand up. “Look, you’ve made me feel better already. We don’t need to go there.”

I don’t need to dwell more on death.

I want to change the subject. “You were so excited when you came in. I ruined your good mood. What is it you wanted to say?”

“Oh yeah,” Summer’s eyes glimmer. “It
was
good news.”

“What?” I say. “Tell me. Good is always preferable to this morose shit.”

She bites her lip. I can just tell she’s all-but-bursting with the need to splurge. “Well…” she begins. “You know the TA position I was so eager for?”

“Let me guess,” I smile. “You got it?”

“Yes!” she squeals.

“Summer, that’s awesome!”

“I know, I know. Professor Landon made the announcement after class. He was all calm and cool about it. But, when he listed the names his eyes darted up, and he looked right at me!” She’s getting more and more amped with each sentence. “He looked at me, and he
winked
, Celeste! I think I’ve really got a chance with him. Especially if I bring my A-game. You can help, too, you know. Sleuth out any other shady bitches who have their eye on my man. I’ll
destroy
them.” She grins at me. “Oh, this semester’s going to be so much fun!”

My stomach sinks. I think I’m going to be sick.

What would she say if she knew her apparent best friend was one of those shady bitches?

I decide that it’s beyond time to tell her. I don’t know why I even lied to her initially. When Professor Landon walked to the front of the auditorium first class, I should have just been honest and told her:
Yeah, that’s the guy I hooked up with on the yacht.

But I didn’t, and ever since then, I’ve been harboring guilt. No matter how much it might hurt now, delaying will only make the inevitable worst.

“Hey Summer, I…”

“And you know what else?” she continues right over me. “I got
this
!”

She reaches into her pocket and pulls out a brand new keychain. She dangles it in front of my face.

“You got a key?” I ask.

“No, dumb-dumb. I got us a car! My brother’s old mini! He just bought a new car and agreed to give this one to me.”

“Holy shit.” My eyes widen. “No way, really?”

“Yeah, really!” she exclaims. “Now we don’t have to walk everywhere like two idiots. I’ve got another set of keys in my purse just for you.”

She beams.

I have second thoughts about coming clean. Maybe now’s not the
best
time, after all.

Just then my phone rings. For some reason, Summer jumps to get it.

“Oooh, what’s this?” she asks, picking it up and reading the display. “There’s a
James
calling you!” Her smile widens. “Is that your mysterious new lover?”

Alarm rips through me. “Summer, give it back,” I say.

“Ohmigod!” She blurts out. “It is him, isn’t it?”

“Summer, give me the phone.” I make a grab for it. She laughs and hops out of the way. “I swear to God, Summer, if you don’t give it back…”

“You’ll what?” She dances around the room. “You’ll punish me? You’ll get mad? A bit of spice is exactly what we need!”

“Summer…”

She hits answer and puts it on speaker. “Hellooo…” she sings.

I glare at her.

“Celeste,” James’s voice.

Oh God, I could just die.

“Nope! Sorry sweetheart, try again.” Summer’s eyes shine with mischief. “Who’s calling?”

“Give it here!” I hiss.

She waves me away. “If you want to talk to Celeste, you’ll have to tell me who you are.”

“It’s James,” he growls. He does not sound happy. “This isn’t a damn joke. I need to speak to Celeste immediately.”

Somewhere in the midst of that sentence Summer’s good humor seeps away. She stops running around the room. A horrible type of understanding comes over her face. “Wait a second,” she says. “James… as in James
Landon
?”

“Yes, it’s James Landon! Who the fuck else would it be?” comes the snarling reply. “Now put Celeste on the line. I need to…”

Summer drops the phone. It hits the floor and cuts off the line.

She looks at me, her mouth forming silent words. I can just see the betrayal in her eyes. It fills me with the most horrible type of guilt.

The betrayal turns to fury which turns to rage. “You lying cunt!” she screams at me and fumes out the room.

“Summer. Summer, no, wait,” I call out after her. I hear the front door open and shut. “Shit!”

I grab my things and start after her when the phone starts ringing again.

“Mother fucking goddammit!” I curse.

I rip it off the ground and jerk it to my ear. “James. I
cannot
talk to you right now!”

I hit
END
before he can reply and chase after my pissed-off roommate.

29.

I skip to a halt outside the building entrance. I look both ways. There’s no sign of Summer.

“Fuck!” I grunt. Then I remember: the new car.

I take the steps two at a time to the garage. Sure enough, there I see her, striding purposefully to a mini parked all the way on the other side.

“Summer, wait!” I call out after her. She makes no indication of stopping. “Summer!”

The mini beeps as she unlocks the doors. She stuffs herself inside.

The tires screech as she pulls out of the parking spot, makes a sharp right, and then speeds by me.

Just as she passes, though, she flips me the bird.

***

I storm back into the apartment, angry with myself. Angry with Summer. Angry with
everything
.

That was her reaction to me getting a phone call from James. A freaking
phone call!
Or course, if he’s calling me on my cell, and his number is saved under his first name, that obviously implies familiarity…

But I haven’t told her I slept with him yet!

My phone starts to ring.

“What?” I snap into the receiver.

“You missed class,” James says. His voice is low and moody.

I scoff a laugh. “That’s what you’re calling me for?
That’s
what’s so important?”

“Yes.” There is no hesitation, no apology in his voice. “I expect you to make it up by coming to office hours tonight.”

“This is a fucking joke,” I say. I almost hang up. Instead, on a whim, I continue. “I have
way
more pressing things to do than coming to office hours and watching you flirt with the entire female populace.”

“Would you like me to fail you?” he muses. “We might be lovers, Celeste, but first and foremost, I am your professor and you are my student.”

“Don’t,” I warn. “Don’t you
dare
pull that card, James! It was one fucking class! What does it matter?”

“It matters to me,” he says. “It tells me a lot about you. If you think I’m going to play favorites just because of what we have outside the classroom, you’re dead wrong. I expect punctuality from all my students. You do not get special privileges just because I fucked you.”

“What is this
really
about, James?” I demand. “There’s no way you would call me over a single missed class this early in the semester. And no, far from playing favorites, I think you’re picking on me!”

“I am not.”

“You are. Would you threaten anybody else like this if they missed your class? You wouldn’t even have noticed! There are a hundred faces, if not more, in that auditorium every time you give your damn lectures.”

“And I remember every single one,” he says softly. “I dislike your tone, Celeste.”

“Yeah? Well fucking deal with it, James! I’m not playing these little games of yours. I have other shit to do!”

“Like what?” he demands.

Like what? I think to myself. Like dealing with a potential cancer recurrence, like badly missing my mom, like trying to reconcile with a best friend who now hates my guts.

“Summer just threw a fit and ran out the door,” I indulge him. “She found out
you
were calling and pieced two and two together. She’s fucking pissed.”

James startles me by laughing. “
That’s
your excuse?” he chortles. “No, Celeste. No. That is not good enough. You’re coming to office hours or you fail. You do not receive preferential treatment. End of.”

“And what about your preferential treatment? What about the blowjobs I’ve give you, the—”

I stop short because halfway through, the line cuts off.

“Fucking asshole,” I mutter, stuffing the phone back into my purse. So, he thinks he’s going to fail me over one missed class, does he? He thinks he’s going to get his way just because he’s the fucking professor?

I check the time. I have forty minutes before the start of his damn office hours.
One
hour if the delayed beginning last week was any indication.

He wants to play hardball. Fine. Fine, I’ll humor him. I’ll show up to his crude facsimile of a “lesson.”

But I’m going to be a complete bitch about it.

30.

I try ringing Summer, multiple times, on the way over. Needless to say, she doesn’t pick up.

I enter the building and see the expected crowd in front of James’ doors. I roll my eyes. He’s late again.