Vintage Volume One (20 page)

I wanted to be strong. I wanted to deny him and ignore him. He wasn’t good for me. He would only hurt me.

His lips were on my neck, and that was my undoing.

I was in self-destruction mode. Lust and instant gratification overcame the need to protect myself.

The scruff on his chin tickled my hot flesh. His tongue traced a path along my neck, and the tears slowed as my body automatically turned into him. His mouth crashed down over mine, his tongue hot and persistent and tangy from the gin.

I moaned, and one of his hands forced its way under my tank top to my bare breast. He was rough as he grappled at my breast, and then he tweaked my nipple. Hard.

I yelped out a startled moan, which turned into some erotic noise that I didn’t even know I was capable of making.

And then suddenly he was over me, thrusting his hips toward mine as he kissed me in that erotic way he had, his hand running up the length of my torso as he pushed his body toward mine. We were separated by clothes as I kissed him with a hunger I’d never felt before.

I’d missed this. I’d missed him. I’d missed the way his body connected with mine, the way he fucked me so hard that I thought we’d break the bedframe and then the way he made love to me so gently that I never wanted it to end.

“Parker,” I cried out on one particularly hard thrust. A growl rumbled up from his chest, and then he pulled away from me, panting. A low curse escaped his lips as he sat up. All I could see was his silhouette in the dark room.

“We shouldn’t—” he started, but I cut him off.

“Don’t stop.” I reached for the hem of my tank top and took it off, throwing it to the ground, and then I pulled off my shorts and panties.

“I don’t have a condom.”

“I don’t care. Fuck me, Parker. Now.”

“Without a condom?”

“I’m on the pill. Can I trust you?”

He hesitated for only a moment. Then he nodded as he shoved his boxers off and to the floor and reared over the top of me again.

I felt the head of his cock between my legs. He slid it through my wet pussy, pressing it firmly against my sensitive clit. Then he dipped it lower and pushed into me.

The slick feel of his cock pumping into me with nothing separating us was incredible. It was like the first time all over again.

I dug my nails into his back, scraping my way as I held onto him, afraid the moment would end too soon.

“Holy fuck, you feel good,” he groaned. He thrust up hard, balancing himself on one arm and running his other arm up my body.

Then he shifted and hit my G-spot repeatedly with his perfect cock, slamming into me and pushing me into a soul-crushing orgasm that had my entire body clenching him to me.

I screamed out in pleasure as he continued driving into me, and then I heard “Jimi” on a growl. He pulled out of me and jerked himself off. I felt the warm, sticky fluid on my stomach, and then Parker collapsed next to me for a few brief seconds. He pressed his lips to my neck, and then he stood and padded over to the bathroom.

He returned a moment later with a warm washcloth. He ran it tenderly over my pussy first, and then he wiped up the mess he’d painted on my stomach. His movements were gentle and slow, as if taking care of me was the only priority he had in life.

He tossed the washcloth on the bathroom floor and returned to the bed, kissing my lips softly once more before pulling my body against his.

thirty-five

“Come on, Roxy. We’re going to be late,” Damien said. He was wearing a black suit. It made his dirty blond hair look lighter than usual, almost a halo effect. His blue eyes were shining.

He
never
wore a suit.

I couldn’t remember a time when I’d seen him that dressed up.

I stared at him in confusion.

“Where are we going?” I asked. I was sitting on the couch in the house I shared with him.

“Put on your black dress. The one that’s your favorite. And hurry! We don’t have a lot of time.”

I followed his directions. I put on the black dress and the heels that made me feel like I had the sexiest legs on earth.

I curled my hair. I almost never curled my hair unless it was a really special occasion. Damien had only told me to hurry, though. He hadn’t told me where we were going.

It just seemed special since he was so dressed up.

I stood at the mirror, fastening the diamond studs my dad had given me for my sixteenth birthday. They reminded me of Katie. I’d received those earrings on the second birthday I’d had without her, and somehow the sparkling diamonds reminded me of her sparkling personality, her beautiful presence in all of our lives.

But she was long gone.

I missed her every day, even after all this time had passed. I was sure I’d miss her every day for the rest of my life.

I hadn’t been able to replace her presence in my life with any other girlfriend, so I stayed away from girls. I didn’t need anyone, anyway.

I had Damien, and he was all I needed.

Just as much as he needed me.

“Roxy, you know that I need you, right?” Damien was standing behind me. He’d snuck up on me.

Our eyes met in the mirror. “I know you do, D. Just like I need you. Now are you going to tell me where we’re going?”

He grinned at me in the mirror and shook his head a little, as if to say that because I was so stubborn, he had to ruin the surprise.

“Okay, Roxy. I’ll tell you.”

A butterfly soared across the room, and I looked at it as if it were totally normal.

I turned around to face him. His blue eyes had turned from bright and shiny to withdrawn and sad. The halo effect that had shown over him only a moment earlier had turned dark, almost like he had a cloud over him. It had to be the shadows in the room playing tricks on my eyes.

He looked sad as he gazed at me. “You look beautiful, Roxy. And if we don’t get going, we’re going to be late to my funeral.”

thirty-six

I sat up in bed, my heart pounding as I gasped for breath.

The room I was in was completely dark except for a tiny sliver of light peeking through the curtains. Someone was in the bed next to me, and as I gathered my bearings, I realized that I was about to throw up.

I stumbled through the room toward the bathroom, making it to the toilet just in time.

I looked down at myself as my eyes watered. I was stark naked, kneeling over a toilet in a dark bathroom that was only lit by the glow from the built-in nightlight in the light switch.

I felt my stomach retch again, and then I felt my hair being swept back from my face as I continued to expunge the contents of my stomach.

Warm fingertips drew calming circles on my back, soothing and comforting me.

“I knew the rum on top of the vodka was a bad idea,” Parker whispered. “You okay?”

I sniffed. I always cried when I threw up. “Yeah,” I whispered, my voice small as I waited out another heave. It was empty. Dry. I’d gotten everything out.

I stood on shaky legs and rinsed out my mouth.

“Sit,” Parker commanded, lowering the toilet lid and flushing the toilet for me.

He disappeared, and a stream of light from the other room flooded the bathroom. I leaned my head against the wall, a pounding headache searing through my brain.

It wasn’t the combination of alcohol. It was the dream.

I was small and scrawny, but I could hold my liquor. I had my dad’s kidneys.

But that dream had panicked me. It filled me with anxiety.

And the scariest part was that I hadn’t even taken my sleeping pills. Those were usually the nights I had my vivid dreams. When I drank, I usually passed out cold and slept a dreamless sleep—or at least a sleep where I didn’t remember my dreams.

So what was that dream telling me? Was Damien in trouble?

Parker reappeared with my toiletry bag and the clothes that had been tossed on the floor in our lust. He set the bag on the counter. He handed me the clothes, and I got dressed while he pulled out my toothbrush and toothpaste. He set it up for me and handed me the brush. I made a few passes around my mouth while he filled a cup with water.

I stood and spit, rinsing out my mouth a few extra times.

“Feel better?” he asked.

I nodded, my eyes drinking him in. His hair was messy and the snake on his torso stared at me.

He looked so damn good in nothing but underwear.

He held my gaze for a few seconds, and then he carried two waters to the bedroom, setting one on the night table next to my side of the bed and the other on the night table next to his side.

He turned out the light, and then we both fell back into bed.

He pulled me close against him again, and I felt warm and safe snuggled in his arms.

The next morning, I awoke when I heard rustling next to me. The bed dipped, and I watched as Parker got up and headed toward the bathroom. I heard the shower turn on. I was alone for a few moments, grateful that I hadn’t remembered any other dreams except for the vivid one of Damien.

I got up and checked my phone.

Nothing new.

But that wasn’t a huge shock. The only people who ever texted me were Parker and my dad.

It was a little before eleven. We had to get to Madison Square Garden by two, so we had a little bit of time to kill. Enough to shower and get dressed and maybe grab some lunch before we left.

I got up and pulled some clothes out of my bag, gathering everything I’d need to shower once Parker was done.

I sat in the loveseat by the window, staring out over the city as the dream from the night before replayed in my mind.

I hated those types of dreams. I knew it would be with me all day, clouding everything I did. I tried not to think about it, but that only made me think about it even more.

Parker emerged from the bathroom a few minutes later, wearing just a pair of jeans that hugged his hips perfectly. I stared as he rubbed his hair dry with a towel. A few droplets of water glistened on his chest, and I couldn’t help but remember the night before when that chest was hovering over me, when his body entered mine and nothing separated skin from skin.

A tingle ran up my spine, but I stopped it in its tracks.

“Good morning,” he said, his voice cautious. He threw the towel in the bathroom and ran a hand through his damp hair. “Feeling any better?”

I thought about telling him about the dream. I thought about admitting that it hadn’t been the liquor. But all of that would just complicate things. It would just leave him with questions that I wasn’t prepared to answer.

So I ignored his question and opted to tell him what was on my mind.

“Last night doesn’t change things, Parker.”

He chuckled. “Of course it does.”

I shook my head. “I gave into something that I shouldn’t have. You betrayed me, and I don’t think I can get past that.”

He walked over toward the window, toward me, and he knelt on the floor by my legs. I gazed down at him. “You have to,” he said simply. “I refuse to believe that I’ll never get to do what we did last night ever again. I refuse to believe that you don’t feel as strongly about me as I do for you. I’m persistent, Jimi. I get what I want because I don’t give up.”

“It doesn’t matter how strongly I feel for you. Betrayal negates all of that.”

“I think someday you will see that everything I did was in your best interest. Someday you’ll believe me. And I’ll be right here, ready to wrap you in my arms the second that happens.”

I sighed and stood, stepping around him and toward the bathroom for my shower.

His words rattled around in my mind. He was like a house fly. He was annoying and I couldn’t figure out a way to get rid of him.

But he was absolutely right about one thing. I felt strongly for him, and the hatred I’d felt the day before was quickly morphing back into the love that I’d been developing for him since the night we met.

I lucked out. My dad wanted lunch with me. I was pissed at him, too, but he was my dad. I was stuck with him forever. I’d get past what he did eventually because he’d done it to protect me.

And I felt a little better after spending some of his cash on the minibar.

He invited Parker to our lunch date, but Parker opted to meet up with the Flashing Light guys since I was under my father’s watch. I was grateful for the time away from Parker.

But to be honest, I missed him the second the door shut behind him when he’d left me with my dad.

“Where’s Jadyn?” I asked after we were seated at some fancy French place near Times Square.

“I told her I needed to talk to you alone.”

“Does she know what’s going on?”

My dad shook his head. “She knows that Randy and I aren’t friends anymore, but she doesn’t know much else.”

“Literally?”

My dad laughed. “She’s an educated businesswoman, CC. Give her some credit.”

“She did manage to snag the elusive Gideon Price.”

I was rewarded with another laugh from my dad.

We both ordered soup, and I grabbed the baguette sitting on our table, debating whether or not to bring up my suspicious about Jadyn. I pulled off a chunk of bread and popped it in my mouth. It tasted perfect on my empty stomach.

“So I know you hate this, but I have to keep Parker with you at all times when I’m not with you. Keith, Vanessa, and George are additional alternatives if we’re both tied up, which will happen on gig nights.”

“I’m not a little kid, Dad.”

“I’m well aware of that.” He raised an eyebrow in my direction, and I squirmed.

It was like he could see right through me, like he knew what Parker and I had done the night before. I felt heat creeping up my neck at the thought of Parker’s lips on my body.

I had to get control of my damn hormones.

I shoved another piece of bread in my mouth.

“The problem is that Randy has a lot of associates in New York. All over the country, really. None of us are safe, and George has been working tirelessly to ensure that our trip is seamless. I can get Bruno back on you, but I feel more comfortable with Parker.” My dad pulled off a hunk of bread.

“I’ll take Bruno.”

“You’d be okay with Bruno staying in your room with you? Sleeping on your bus?” He took a bite of his bread.

“Wait a minute. Sleeping on my bus? I thought you said Vanessa and Keith were alternatives.”

“We made a few bus changes last night. You and Parker are sharing Shadow Two.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I tossed my bread down on my plate. Tossed, threw. Same difference.

“Don’t talk to me like that,” he said sharply. “You know it pisses me off.”

“You really want to talk about being pissed off, Dad?”

My dad laughed just as the waitress delivered our soup, giving me something to focus on besides this ridiculous conversation. But I had lost my appetite somewhere around “bus changes.”

So in those moments when I would be able to escape to my bus, to travel to our next destination, to have the quiet peace away from this hot mess, I’d still be stuck with Parker James.

My dad and I went straight from lunch to Madison Square Garden. I completed my duties in record time, and then I hung out in my dad’s waiting room with Jadyn.

We sat in the same room on the same couch together and stared blankly at the television. I wasn’t even paying attention to the show that was on. I could not have cared less, really, what was on. I was too stuck in my own thoughts.

And I literally had nothing to talk about with my step-mommy. I could not think of a single thing to say to her that wouldn’t come out accusatory and hateful. So I remained silent.

And then a commercial came on, and Jadyn started with small talk.

“So you and Parker are dating?” she asked. It rubbed me the wrong way that she’d even asked. I didn’t want to talk about my personal life with her, let alone the complications of it.

“Sort of,” I answered absently.

“He seems nice.”

“He’s a lot of things. I don’t know that I would use the word ‘nice’ to describe him.”

“Spoken like a girlfriend.” She laughed at her own joke, like her wit just couldn’t be matched. I shrugged.

“How’s married life?” I asked, trying to deflect the conversation from me and my personal life.

“It’s perfect. He’s perfect.” She started gushing, but I tuned her out. It sort of made me sick to think that she was married to my father. She was a gold digger, but I had to give my dad credit. If he was in love with her, that was his prerogative. He wouldn’t have married someone if he didn’t love her, and as irritated as I was with my dad, he deserved to have his daughter treat his new wife with courtesy. Even if I didn’t trust one word out of her lying mouth.

My dad came in the room and sat on the middle cushion of the couch, right between us.

Mikey followed behind him, and he sat in a chair across the room. My dad and Mikey had been best friends my entire life, and I looked at Mikey like a second father. He didn’t look like the fatherly type, but then again, neither did my own dad. Mikey had long black hair, and he always wore a bandana around his hair, Bret Michaels style. He had eyes so dark that they were almost black, and his skin was toned a beautiful olive color. Katie had been born his exact opposite—with her mother’s fair skin, light hair, and blue eyes.

As much as I knew Mikey missed his perfect life before Katie had died and Fern had left him, he’d remained the same guy I had grown up with.

Johnny, Black Shadow’s bassist, and Carlos the guitarist shuffled in behind Mikey. Johnny was the youngest of the men. He’d been only sixteen when Black Shadow had first formed, and he’d spent the first tour they’d ever gone on with a private tutor so he could finish his high school degree. The ladies tended to love him as he was incredibly attractive. He was the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome. He kept his hair cropped short, and he kept one of those really sexy, perfect beards. When I was a little girl, I’d nursed a crush on him, but now I just thought of him as one of my dad’s friends.

And I always thought of Carlos as the jokester of the group. All four men were gentlemen, and all four knew how to have one hell of a good time. But Carlos told raunchy jokes, and he didn’t care who heard them.

“You’re all gracing us with your presence before the show? What’s the occasion, boys?” I asked with a grin.

Mikey glanced over at my dad. Johnny and Carlos stared at the floor. My dad put his arm around my shoulders, and I felt nerves kick in.

“Someone attacked Keith last night. He’s fine. He went to the ER and was released with a few bruised ribs.” My dad looked anxiously at me.

I didn’t know what to say. Keith? Why would someone attack Keith?

I thought they were after me.

Clearly Randy was stopping at nothing to rattle my dad. It was a clear message that he’d take out anyone close to Gideon Price.