Violated (26 page)

Frustrated and still pumped up on adrenaline, he went to the kitchenette and flicked on the light. The clock on the coffeemaker said it was a little after 4:00 a.m., just a bit more than an hour after they’d gone to bed. But there was no way Russ could go back to sleep after hearing Derek crying out like that. He thought about coffee, but what he really needed was something to calm himself down, not get himself more stirred up. He found some herbal tea in the cupboard and zapped a cup of water in the microwave.

When it was heated, he pulled out the cup and dropped the tea bag into it. Then Derek’s bedroom door opened and Derek came out, looking disheveled and unhappy. He was in his sweats again. Russ glanced down at himself, half afraid he wasn’t wearing anything, but he’d kept his boxer briefs on when he climbed into the sleeping bag, not wanting to flash Derek in the morning.

“I’m sorry,” Derek muttered.

“You want some herbal tea?”

“Yeah.”

Russ slid the cup toward him on the bar and got up to take another mug out of the cupboard for himself. While he was filling it with water and placing it in the microwave, Derek settled himself on one of the bar stools.

“Nightmare?” Russ asked.

“I guess so. I don’t really remember.”

“How do you feel?”

Derek grimaced and shrugged. “Anxious, freaked out. The usual.”

The microwave dinged, so Russ removed his cup and set it on the bar. Then he went back to the cupboard for another tea bag. “I’ve been thinking….” He came back to the bar and sat down, keeping himself a few feet away from Derek. He dropped the tea bag into the cup. “What if there was a woman here? Would that make you more comfortable?”

“Who? I don’t have many friends at the moment.”

“I have an older sister,” Russ said. “She’s got a husband and a son, so she wouldn’t want to do it for long, but I might be able to convince her to spend a weekend with us.”

Derek groaned and put his head in his hands. “A chaperone? I’m not a seventeen-year-old girl.”

Russ laughed gently and said, “She’d kick my ass if I tried anything you weren’t comfortable with. I guarantee it. This isn’t about making you feel like a teenage girl. It’s about you feeling safe when you’re with me.”

“I know I’m safe when I’m with you.”

Russ took a sip of his tea. It wasn’t bad. Some kind of vanilla and cinnamon herbal mix. “Yeah, I know.” But they both knew it wasn’t that simple. “Anyway, I wouldn’t want Shannon coming over here right now—not with Tarzan stalking you. Maybe it’s something we can do later….” He almost said, “When it’s over,” but he wasn’t sure when it
would
be over.

They sipped their tea in silence for a couple of minutes, both looking like zombies on a break between film takes. Then Derek said, “You haven’t chewed me out about going to Tampa yet.”

Russ shrugged. “They just called you on Thursday. You don’t have to go this weekend.”

“I don’t know if I can do it. I mean, flying down might not be so bad, but….”

“You don’t want to stay in a hotel room?”

“God, no!”

“Not even alone?”

“No!” Derek’s eyes were wide. “Maybe never fucking again!”

Russ thought about that for a minute. Then a solution dawned on him. “Have I told you my parents live in Tampa?”

Derek slowly looked up at him. “No.”

T
HE
PLANE
trip was more difficult than Derek had expected it to be. On top of the normal discomforts of flying—he’d always hated it—it was too reminiscent of that nightmarish trip home with Victor. The plane was overbooked, as always, so he and Russ didn’t have the luxury of putting an empty seat between them. They had to sit with their arms and shoulders pressed together, and Derek was on the verge of a panic attack the entire flight.

Fortunately, it was a relatively short flight. A bit over three hours, plus time dicking around in the Manchester airport and the one in Tampa. Russ’s mother picked them up at the Tampa airport. Apparently Russ had asked her to come instead of his father. He’d been worried that being trapped in a car with two men on the ride to the house might stress Derek out, and Derek couldn’t deny that it might have. As it was, he found Mrs. Thomas to be very pleasant company. She was an attractive woman, probably in her late fifties, with salt-and-pepper hair leaning a bit more toward salt and Russ’s clear blue eyes. She was friendly and extremely talkative. She filled her son in on all the local gossip and family matters he apparently hadn’t heard about, with no concern whatsoever for the fact that Derek was listening in.

This was particularly weird when it came to the argument Shannon and Bill were having about Bill considering a vasectomy. “He doesn’t think they’ll want to have any more children,” Mrs. Thomas explained to Derek. “They already have one, and he’s a handful. And I understand that Bill doesn’t like having to wear condoms—he doesn’t think it feels as good with one on—”

“Mom!” Russ interrupted from the backseat. “Derek doesn’t want to hear about what makes Bill’s penis feel good.”

Mrs. Thomas batted her eyelashes. “I’m sorry. Should we be talking about what makes your penis feel good instead?”

Derek snorted. He couldn’t help it.

“He doesn’t want to hear
that
either,” Russ muttered. “And
I
sure as hell don’t want my
mother
talking about my
genitals
. Okay?”

Mrs. Thomas winked at Derek, making him wonder just what Russ had told her about their relationship. She seemed to be assuming they were a couple. Did she know about what had happened to him? That he couldn’t handle having sex or even being touched? Russ had assured him he could have his own room if he wanted. Would that seem weird to Russ’s parents?

“Anyway,” Mrs. Thomas went on, “Shannon wants to have more children, so she isn’t at all happy about him considering a vasectomy. She called us as a last resort.”

“To do what?” Russ asked. “Are you going to fly to New Hampshire for an intervention?”

“No, of course not, dear. We can call him from here.”

Russ groaned and buried his face in his hands, and Derek felt as if he was getting a glimpse into the past, watching a scene that had played out almost identically throughout Russ’s life, from the time he was a small boy. “Can we please talk about something else?”

“Did your father mention he’s going in for his colonoscopy next week?”

T
HE
T
HOMAS
house was a moderate-sized ranch-style out in the suburbs on a small plot of lush green lawn. It was charming and reminded Derek a bit of the house in
The Brady Bunch
. He was disappointed that Russ hadn’t grown up in it. It seemed an idyllic place to have a childhood—certainly better than the run-down trailer he and his mother had moved into with Larry. Derek still cringed whenever he saw an earwig, since the trailer had been infested with them.

Russ’s father met them at the door, a tall, broad-shouldered man with silver hair and a chiseled jaw. According to Russ, he’d been a policeman himself before he retired. He shook Derek’s hand with an iron grasp that made Derek’s body tremble with anxiety. “Derek! Russ tells us good things about you.”

Derek knew the man was simply being friendly. It wasn’t his fault he was naturally intimidating. He wasn’t actually any taller or more muscular than Derek himself—he was just so… confident. Derek forced himself to smile and respond, “Thank you for letting me stay a few days.”

“Not a problem. We’re happy for the chance to get to know you better.”

Again, Derek wondered what they’d been told about his relationship with Russ. It wasn’t that he found the idea of being Russ’s boyfriend at all unpleasant, but he could hardly call himself that if he wouldn’t even kiss or cuddle, never mind sex.

Russ said, “Let’s put our stuff in the bedroom.”

Derek’s anxiety jumped up a notch. Had Russ tricked him? Would they be expected to share a bed after all? He followed Russ through the living room and down a narrow hallway to a room at the end.

“This is the guest room,” Russ announced, setting his bags down. Then he moved farther inside and took a seat on the king-sized bed. “Set your suitcase down and take a seat. I want to talk to you for a minute.”

Derek did as he was told, settling on a wooden chair near the door.

“First of all,” Russ said, “sorry about the ’rents. I knew Dad would probably make you a little nervous. That’s why I asked Mom to come to the airport to get us. I was hoping you’d find her a little easier to deal with.”

“She’s very nice,” Derek said. “So’s your dad.”

“I told them you were a friend—not my boyfriend. But of course they jump to conclusions. I’ve never introduced any of the guys I dated to them, so they probably see marriage on the horizon.”

Derek laughed. “Well, there are worse things than being mistaken for your boyfriend.”

Russ looked at him for a long time before saying, “I hope so. Anyway, I’ll try to set them straight. But in the meantime, this is your room. I’ll leave my stuff in here, but I’ll be sleeping out on the couch. Okay?”

“Okay.” Derek found himself both relieved and disappointed at that. But the feeling of being backed into a corner subsided.

R
USS
HAD
no desire to sleep on the couch again. He wanted to sleep with Derek so bad he could taste it. Or at least cuddle and make out. But this wasn’t about him. It might, in fact,
never
be about him. He wanted to help Derek in whatever way he could, and if Derek never saw him as more than just a friend, he had to be okay with that. Russ didn’t want to be the kind of friend who was only being nice in the hope of getting laid in the future.

But dammit… he
liked
Derek.

He stood and asked, “Are you tired? I can leave you alone a bit, if you want to take a nap after all that traveling.” Derek looked exhausted. It was obvious the flight had kind of freaked him out. Whether it was from being surrounded by people—and having to be practically squished against Russ’s side the entire flight—or being reminded of his trip with Victor, Russ wasn’t sure.

“Actually, that might be good.”

“Okay, dude. Chill out here for a while. I’ll go spend ‘quality time’ with my parents.” He was unable to restrain himself from rolling his eyes. As much as he loved his mom and dad, there were reasons he and Shannon had been happy to see them move fourteen-hundred miles away.

He left Derek to his own devices and went to find his folks.

They’d moved into the kitchen, where his father was setting up the coffeemaker. He glanced up as Russ entered and asked, “Does your friend drink coffee?”

“He does, but he’s lying down now. It was a long, uncomfortable flight.”

His mother perked up as soon as she realized they were alone. “Oh, sweetie! You nabbed a
handsome
one!”

Russ smirked at that as he took a seat across from her at the table. “I haven’t nabbed him. I told you guys, he’s going through a rough time right now. He isn’t ready to think about a new relationship. He just broke up with his fiancé, for one thing.”

She sighed and pouted a bit, no doubt heartbroken her baby boy wasn’t ready to solicit her advice on china patterns.

“Why are you going to the police station tomorrow?” his father asked.

“Sorry, Dad. That’s his private business. I’m just here for moral support.”

His father harrumphed. “He’s not involved in anything illegal, is he?”

“Oh, Russ!” his mother gasped, putting a hand to her mouth. “Please don’t fall in love with a drug dealer!”

Russ raised his eyebrows at her. “Seriously? He’s not a drug dealer, Mom. He hasn’t done anything illegal. But he needs to talk to the police about a crime that occurred here in Tampa, so that’s why we’re here. It’s all about jurisdiction.” He looked sternly at his father. “And that’s all I’m gonna say about it.”

His father grunted noncommittally as he set the coffeemaker to brew and joined them at the table. “Do you think Derek will want to go out to dinner? Or should we have something delivered?”

None of the Thomases were big on cooking.

“He won’t want to go out,” Russ said, fairly certain Derek needed more recuperation time than a couple hours. “What do you have for takeout around here?”

T
O
R
USS
’
S
relief, Derek woke from his nap after a little more than an hour. Russ had been worried he might sleep the entire evening away. Instead he was more or less himself again, chatting amiably with Russ’s parents and digging into the Thai food they had delivered with a healthy appetite.

Russ was also pleased to see his parents behaving. His mother, especially, could be nosy as hell when something piqued her curiosity, and he’d half expected her to start grilling Derek about what his intentions were toward her son. Fortunately she did not. She was rather charming, in fact. Derek seemed to adore her.

Little did he know, that was her most deadly tactic—acting sweet and a bit befuddled to lull someone into a false sense of security. Before he knew it, he’d be spilling his most intimate secrets. She’d used it on her own children often enough.

Mr. Thomas was more direct. He just fixed someone with a penetrating stare and made him feel as if he was being cross-examined over coffee and vanilla wafers.

But Russ kept an eye on things and managed to divert his parents’ attention away from anything too personal as the evening wore on. Eventually they turned in for the night, leaving him and Derek alone in the living room. It was only about ten o’clock, which was early for both of them, so Russ suggested they move out to the “birdcage”—the name Florida residents gave to the screened-in back deck.