Read Volpone and Other Plays Online
Authors: Ben Jonson
Volpone and Other Plays (25 page)
This's but confederacy to blind the rest.
You are the heir?
VOLTORE:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â A strange, officious,
Troublesome knave! Thou dost torment me.
VOLPONE [
aside
]:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I know â
It cannot be, sir, that you should be cozened;
'Tis not within the wit of man to do it.
You are so wise, so prudent, and 'tis fit
20Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â That wealth and wisdom still should go together.
[
Exeunt
.]
SCENE FIVE
]
[
The Scrutineo
.]
[
Enter Four
AVOCATORI, NOTARIO, COMMENDATORI, BONARIO, CELIA, CORBACCIO
,
and
CORVINO
.]
[
1ST AVOCATORE
:] Are all the parties here?
NOTARIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â All but the advocate.
2ND AVOCATORE
: And here he comes.
[
Enter
VOLTORE
followed by
VOLPONE
,
disguised
.]
AVOCATORI
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Then bring 'em forth to sentence.
VOLTORE
: O my most honoured fathers, let your mercy
Once win upon your justice, to forgive â
I am distracted â
VOLPONE
[
aside
]: What will he do now?
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â O,
I know not which t' address myself to first,
Whether your fatherhoods, or these innocents â
CORVINO
[
aside
]: Will he betray himself?
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Whom equally
I have abused, out of most covetous ends â
CORVINO
: The man is mad!
CORBACCIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â What's that?
10Â Â Â Â
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â He is
possessed
.
VOLTORE
: For which, now struck in conscience, here I prostrate
Myself at your offended feet, for pardon.
[
He kneels
.]
1ST
,
2ND AVOCATORI
: Arise.
CELIA
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â O heav' n, how just thou art!
VOLFONE
[
aside
]:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I'm caught
I' mine own noose.
CORVINO
[
aside to
CORBACCIO
]: Be constant, sir, nought now
Can help but impudence.
1ST AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Speak forward.
COMMENDATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Silence!
VOLTORE
: It is not passion in me, reverend fathers,
But only conscience, conscience, my good sires,
That makes me now tell truth. That parasite,
That knave, hath been the instrument of all.
20Â Â Â Â
AVOCATORI
: Where is that knave? Fetch him.
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â I go.
[
Exit
.]
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Grave fathers,
This man's distracted, he confessed it now,
For, hoping to be old Volpone's heir,
Who now is dead â
3RD AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â How!
2ND AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Is Volpone dead?
CORVINO
: Dead since, grave fathers â
BONARIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â O sure vengeance!
1ST AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Stay.
Then he was no deceiver.
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â O, no, none;
The parasite, grave fathers.
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â He does speak
Out of mere envy, ' cause the servant's made
The thing he
gaped
for. Please your fatherhoods,
This is the truth; though I'll not justify
30Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â The other, but he may be some-deal faulty.
VOLTORE
: Ay, to your hopes, as well as mine, Corvino.
But I'll use modesty. Pleaseth your wisdoms
To view these certain notes, and but confer them;
As I hope favour, they shall speak clear truth.
CORVINO
: The devil has entered him!
BONARIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Or bides in you.
4TH AVOCATORE
: We have done ill, by a public officer
To send for him, if he be heir.
2ND AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â For whom?
4TH AVOCATORE
: Him that they call the parasite.
3RD AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â 'Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Tis true,
He is a man of great estate now left.
40Â Â Â Â
4TH AVOCATORE
: Go you, and learn his name, and say the court
Entreats his presence here, but to the clearing
Of some few doubts.
[
Exit
NOTARIO
.]
2ND AVOCATORE
: This same's a labyrinth!
1ST AVOCATORE
: Stand you unto your first report?
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â My state,
My life, my fame â
BONARIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Where is't?
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Are at the stake.
1ST AVOCATORE
: Is yours so too?
CORBACCIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â The advocate's a knave,
And has a forkèd tongue â
2ND AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Speak to the point.
CORBACCIO
: So is the parasite too.
1ST AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â This is confusion.
VOLTORE
: I do beseech your fatherhoods, read but those.
CORVINO
: And credit nothing the false spirit hath writ.
50Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â It cannot be but he is possessed, grave fathers.
SCENE SIX
]
[A
street
.]
[
Enter
VOLPONE
,
alone
.]
[
VOLPONE
:] To make a snare for mine own neck! And run
My head into it wilfully, with laughter!
When I had newly 'scaped, was free and clear!
Out of mere wantonness! O, the dull devil
Was in this brain of mine when I devised it,
And Mosca
gave it second
; he must now
Help to
sear up
this vein, or we bleed dead.
[
Enter
NANO
,
ANDROGYNO
,
and
CASTRONE
.]
How now! Who let you loose? Whither go you now?
What, to buy gingerbread, or to drown
kitlings
?
10Â Â Â Â
NANO
: Sir, Master Mosca called us out of doors,
And bid us all go play, and took the keys.
ANDROGYNO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Yes.
VOLPONE
: Did Master Mosca take the keys? Why, so!
I am farther in. These are my fine conceits!
I must be merry, with a mischief to me!
What a vile wretch was I, that could not bear
My fortune soberly; I must ha' my crotchets
And my conundrums! Well, go you and seek him.
His meaning may be truer than my fear.
Bid him, he straight come to me to the court;
20Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Thither will I, and if't be possible,
Unscrew my advocate, upon new hopes.
When I provoked him, then I lost myself.
[
Exeunt
.]
SCENE SEVEN
]
V, xii           [
The Scrutineo
.]
[
Enter four
AVOCATORI
,
NOTARIO
,
VOLTORE
,
BONARIO
,
CELIA
,
CORBACCIO
,
and
CORVINO
.]
[
1ST AVOCATORE
:] These things can ne' er be reconciled. He here
Professeth that the gentleman was wronged,
And that the gentlewoman was brought thither,
Forced by her husband, and there left.
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Most true.
CELIA
: How ready is heav' n to those that pray!
1ST AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â But that
Volpone would have ravished her, he holds
Utterly false, knowing his impotence.
CORVINO
: Grave fathers, he is possessed; again, I say,
Possessed. Nay, if there be
possession
And
obsession
, he has both.
10Â Â Â Â
3RD AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Here comes our officer.
[
Enter
VOLPONE
,
disguised
.]
VOLPONE
: The parasite will straight be here, grave fathers.
4TH AVOCATORE
: You might invent some other name, Sir Varlet.
3RD AVOCATORE
: Did not the notary meet him?
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Not that I know.
4TH AVOCATORE
: His coming will clear all.
2ND AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Yet, it is misty.
VOLTORE
: May't please your fatherhoods â
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Sir, the parasite
VOLPONE
whispers
[
to
]
the
ADVOCATE
.
Willed me to tell you that his master lives;
That you are still the man; your hopes the same;
And this was only a jest â
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â How?
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Sir, to try
If you were firm, and how you stood affected.
VOLTORE
: Art sure he lives?
20Â Â Â Â
VOLPONE
: Do I live, sir?
VOLTORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â O me!
I was too violent.
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Sir, you may redeem it:
They said you were possessed: fall down, and seem so.
I'll help to make it good.
VOLTORE
falls
.
                                   God bless the man!
â Stop your wind hard, and swell â See, see, see, see!
He vomits
crooked pins
! His eyes are set
Like a dead hare's hung in a poulter's shop!
His mouth's running away! Do you see, signior?
Now, 'tis in his belly.
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Ay, the devil!
VOLPONE
: Now, in his throat.
CORVINO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Ay, I perceive it plain.
30Â Â Â Â
VOLPONE
: 'Twill out, 'twill out! Stand clear. See where it flies!
In shape of a blue toad, with a bat's wings!
Do you not see it, sir?
CORBACCIO
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â What? I think I do.
CORVINO
: 'Tis too manifest.
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Look! He comes t' himself.
VOLTORE
: Where am I?
VOLPONE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Take good heart, the worst is past, sir.
You are dispossessed.
1ST AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â What accident is this?
2ND AVOCATORE
: Sudden, and full of wonder!
3RD AVOCATORE
:Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â If he were
Possessed, as it appears, all this is nothing.
CORVINO
: He has been often subject to these fits.
1ST AVOCATORE
: Show him that writing â Do you know it, sir?
40Â Â Â Â
VOLPONE
[
aside
]: Deny it sir, forswear it, know it not.