Wanderlust (50 page)

The doctor came quietly into the room, looked at her, and then came closer to the bed, looking into Audrey's eyes with a stern air. He spoke loudly to her, but his voice was not unkind. Listen to me. Your baby will be here very soon. Listen to me! I want you to take a deep breath ' . He was watching her eyes as they grew wild with the oncoming contraction. Now! Breathe! ' He took her hands away from Vi and Charles. Breathe! Pant ' pant ' like a dog ' that's it! He was shouting at her and Charles was fascinated, but Audrey was doing what he said, and when the contraction ended this time, she looked pleased with herself. The doctor made her take another deep breath and then close her eyes, and then when he felt the contraction start beneath his hand resting lightly on her stomach, he gave her the same orders again. She was back in control, as Charles stood next to her, watching her. I'm going to examine you now, Audrey. the doctor announced, and he told her to pant again, and asked Charles to hold her shoulders. But this time she lost control again from the pain of his examination. It won't be long, he said quietly to Charles, and then began giving Audrey orders again. She lost her temper once, and for the last five minutes all she did was gasp, push, and scream, but suddenly the doctor moved even closer to her, and at the end of her most horrible scream, the doctor gave a satisfied grunt, and glanced only briefly at Charlie's face as the tears began to pour down his cheeks. The baby's head had appeared and he gave a loud wail as Audrey stared at Charles, who was looking at her and the baby between her legs in amazement.

Oh, God ' oh, darling ' here he comes ' he's beautiful! Charlie was overwhelmed as the doctor turned the sturdy little shoulders and delivered the rest of him, and a moment later he lay on his mother's stomach looking up at her, as Charlie touched the son he had wanted for so long, and they both cried, and then looked at Vi, who was crying and laughing with them too. It was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. And she told the doctor so as he stood back, looking pleased.

New methods all that ' for a very old art. He smiled at Audrey and her son. You did beautifully, Mrs. Parker-Scott. Dr. Dick-Read would be very proud of you. He had been using his methods with enormous success, and Audrey had never looked more radiant as Charlie helped her put her son to her breast, and he suckled gently there. An hour later, she lay clean and combed and tidy in her bed, holding him, and Charlie sat next to her, staring at the miracle that had been born to them. He had soft reddish hair, much like hers, and enormous eyes, but on the whole he looked rather like Charles, and the scene was so tender that Vi found that she had to leave them. She could almost not bear seeing them that way ' not since James ' she was ashamed of herself because she was so happy for them. It was six o'clock and the sun had just come up, and it was a beautiful blue and gold July day, as the birds began to sing in the trees outside.

Vi stepped outside the kitchen door and saw the doctor drive away, and then saw another car drive up, an old battered car she had never seen before, with a man at the wheel. She wondered who it was and couldn't imagine who, and then suddenly her heart stopped ' it couldn't be ' it couldn't be ' she let out a scream that Charles and Audrey heard ' and Charles left the room hurriedly to see what had happened to her. He saw the open kitchen door, and saw her standing outside, rooted to the spot, her hand over her mouth, as James got out of the car and stood there for just long enough to see the beauty of her ' the woman he had dreamed of for three months as he crawled out of France, assisted by the Resistance ' and suddenly there she was as he began to cry, and limped slowly toward her. He had lost an arm, but neither of them cared, he was alive ' alive! ' Charlie stood looking at them, and turned away. He went back to Audrey with tears running down his face and a look of astonishment, and she suddenly sensed that something more had happened. She sat up straight in bed and looked at him. Charlie, what is it?

He couldn't find the words, and then began to sob ' they had both come on the same day, only moments apart, his son, and his oldest, dearest friend ' . It's James ' he's here. She lay her head back on the pillow, holding the baby, and began to cry. Their prayers had been answered after all. And Vi had been right all along. He had been alive ' and now he was home.

Thank God. She reached out for Charlie's hand, and they sat there, grateful for the blessings bestowed on them.

It was a long time before James came in to see the three of them, and there were no words for what they felt. There were laughter and tears, and a little while later, the children were whooping and shouting and crying too, as James and Alexandra clung to him, and Molly danced around him and then peered at the little brother who had finally come. It was a day none of them would ever forget, and Charles and Audrey agreed easily to add yet another name to their firstborn. He was James Edward Anthony Charles Parker-Scott ' and a beautiful baby.

It took Charlie another month to fully recover from his wounds and then he reported to the Home Office again. It still bothered him a bit from time to time, but not enough to keep him home anymore. He had been home for long enough, nearly eight months, and he was anxious to get back into action. But they had new plans for him now. They wanted him to go back to North Africa again, but Casablanca this time. There was a great deal for him to do there, and Audrey was almost jealous when he left. Jealous of the excitement he would find ' and desperately lonely without him. But he had important work to do. He had confided in her before he left. He was going over as a correspondent again, but he was secretly being assigned to something called Operation Torch. It was a combined British and American effort involving the landing of allied forces in North Africa in the fall, to give them greater control over the Mediterranean. It was exactly what Charlie had been longing for, and his eyes had been filled with excitement as he explained it to her. He was even to be included in the meetings with General Eisenhower later on. He was shipped to Casablanca to help gather information prior to the landing of the allied troops later in the fall. Casablanca was unlike Egypt in that it was not held by allied hands, but technically, Casablanca, Algiers, and Oran were all held by the Vichy French although there was constant intriguing going on. The Germans were there as well, though not in any organized form, the Free French, the British, the Americans, and everyone was selling information to everyone else, stealing mules and selling drugs. It was an extraordinary sort of place, and they were prepared for almost anything. The best part of it was that the Germans were too involved farther east to care about these cities now, and there was an excellent likelihood that the landing would be an enormous success as a result of that.

As she listened to him, Audrey had been truly envious, but she had to stay home with the baby now, and it was nice to be able to give Vi some time alone with James, after all she had done for her. And now they exchanged roles. Audrey took care of all four children most of the time, while James and Vi took drives and long walks, and cherished each moment now that he had returned from the dead. And Audrey shared all of Charlie's letters with them. Casablanca sounded fascinating, and it was obvious that Charlie was happy there.

According to what he wrote, the city seemed to be seething with people and intrigue and confusion and decadence, and in an odd way, from what he said, Audrey was reminded of Shanghai. It was so totally different from the orderly life of Cairo, yet not so very far from there. It was filthy and fuming, according to Charles, and his description of his room at the hotel almost made Audrey's skin crawl. But the most important thing of all was that the landing of the Allied troops in North Africa depended in great part on him. Of course, he couldn't mention that in his letters to her and she was dying to know what was going on.

She knew that the Free French were heavily entrenched there, but officially the Vichy government was in power, although they didn't seem to bother anyone. The officials of the government seemed to be either drinking or with prostitutes most of the time, and it was remarkable what went on right beneath their noses all day long. No one seemed to care, as Italians and Germans and British and Americans wandered through the streets buying and selling whatever it was that had brought them there. Charlie wrote several interesting stories from there, and sent her photographs of children selling cigarettes and hookers standing on street corners, soldiers leering wickedly. It was a potpourri of humanity that sounded fascinating if one could overlook the seaminess of it. He also traveled to Oran and Rabat and Algiers. But Casablanca seemed to be the hub of it.

And in September and October, and in November, the landing forces made their way across the Mediterranean. The Germans knew they were there but couldn't imagine what they were headed for. They were still busy farther east in Egypt and Libya and it took everyone by surprise when the Allies successfully landed simultaneously in Casablanca, Oran, and Algiers on November seventh and eighth of 1942. There was some brief skirmishing between the British and the Vichy garrisons, but the British subdued them quickly and Eisenhower's men rapidly settled in. And then the city was much as it had been before, only busier. It still teemed with activity and mystery, and intrigue between various factions shoved together there, and became a clearing house of sorts for the Free French passing people and information to and from the Resistance forces in Occupied France.

In January, Churchill, Roosevelt, and Generals Giraud and De Gaulle arrived in Casablanca for a much celebrated conference, which left Eisenhower the Chief of the Allied Forces in North Africa, and shortly after that Tripoli fell into British hands. And from that point on, Charlie reported directly to the Americans. He explained it at length to Audrey when he wrote and Audrey explained it to Vi and James. That was all she talked about anymore. Charlie and his missions in North Africa, although she only mentioned it to James and Vi.

Poor thing, she's so desperately lonely without him, Vi said to James one night. She knew only too well how difficult it had been for her, but at least they knew Charlie was safe, for the moment at least. And he didn't seem to have any terribly dangerous missions he was embarking on, at least not from what he said in his letters.

At the time, James was waiting to be reassigned to a desk job, and Vi was thinking of going back to London with him, and leaving the children at Hawthorne House with her father-in-law and of course Audrey would stay on with Molly and Edward, as they called the baby. It was just too confusing to have three Jameses in the house.

I mean, after all, someone might accuse me of dirtying my nappies, and him of drinking a beer. He had teased Audrey one day and she'd laughed. His sense of humor was as good as it ever had been, and Vi was her old self again, although there was still a razor's edge of pain buried in her eyes. She had been through a lot, waiting for news of James, when everyone else thought he had been killed. The tales of how he had made his way through France had been extraordinary. And the worst of them was when he had lost his arm. He had been delirious for eighteen days, in a barn in Provence. Audrey shuddered just thinking of it. But now all was well.

In April, Charlie wrote them that Rommel had returned to Germany, defeated and ill, and Audrey was reminded of the interview they had done with him so long before. It made her hunger to be part of it again. And in May, Vi and James moved back to town and opened their house again. He was able to live at home most of the time, and work in an office all day long, and Violet didn't want to be separated from him now. Not even for a day. Audrey understood perfectly, and she was waiting for Charlie to come home for a few days, but she got a telegram a few days before Edward's birthday that he was unable to get away as he had previously promised.

WILL DO MY BEST. SOON AS POSSIBLE. SORRY CAN'T COME HOME NOW. HOLD THE FORT. LOVE ALWAYS. CHARLIE. But she was getting tired of it. She had stopped nursing the baby a few months before, and she had taken photographs of everyone so many times that she couldn't imagine taking one more picture of any of them. And except for Edward, they all seemed to be fairly independent now. Molly had a busy life, and lots of friends, Alexandra and James were growing up, and baby Edward was just as happy with the nurse or Lord Hawthorne as he was with her. She was saying as much to Vi and James when she had dinner with them in London one night, and they had to repair to the shelter again. Nothing had changed.

I sense that you're building up to something, Aud. James looked at her. Am I correct? He had read her mind before she knew it herself.

I wasn't really thinking of that. It had been a year and a half since she'd come home from North Africa and she was itching to go back, whether she admitted it or not, mostly because she wanted to be with Charlie again, and suddenly as she looked at them both, she knew James was right. That was exactly what she wanted to do. And she went back to the Home Office the next day, and explained her circumstances. She didn't have a hard time convincing them. She had done a good job for them before, and they had plenty of use for her in North Africa. They promised to contact her in a few days, and she hung around with James and Vi waiting to hear from them. And when the call came she gave a whoop of joy, and took the train to the country that night. And now, as she thought of it, she wasn't so sure she had done the right thing. The baby still needed her, and Molly too ' and yet she wanted so much to be with Charlie. The children were safe and content where they were, and she could come back when she wanted to. She was feeling terribly torn as she took the only cab to the house, and walked in the front door, to find the baby in Lord Hawthorne's arms gurgling happily, and Molly wrestling with James good-naturedly. They looked up at her and she smiled at them, wondering how she could tell Molly she was leaving again. But Molly surprised her this time.

She sat down on the edge of her bed that night and began stroking the silky black hair that still reminded her at times of Ling Hwei, and told her that she was thinking of going again. I'll try not to stay away too long this time.