“Whatever you want, Jake. I’m up for it.”
Jake tightened his arm around her shoulders as they descended the steps to the pier. “I thought that was my problem. Pleasing others. Denying myself.”
“If I say I’m ready, I’m ready.” Carla tossed him a smile. “What are you, my therapist?”
“Hey, I thought about being a therapist before I went the escort route. Maybe that will work out yet.”
“Really? You’re considering going back to school?”
“I’ve been looking into it.”
“What will Harry think? We were both under the impression you were going to be a dog walker.”
“I am. But Harry’s a lazy son-of-a-bitch. Sleeps all the time. And that leaves me plenty of hours to pursue a second career. I’m thinking of focusing on sex therapy.” He glanced at her and did that cute eyebrow thing. “Although not so hands-on this time.”
“As long as I have a hands-on arrangement.”
“Oh, you’re not a client.”
“What am I then? A neighbor?”
“No. Well, yes. But I was thinking girlfriend.”
Carla frowned. “I think I’m too old to be a girlfriend.”
“Lover?”
She smiled. “I kind of like that. Very retro. Hey there, lover.”
“Hey.” He pulled her against him and gave her a kiss, warm and deep and full of promises, and when they finally resumed walking, she couldn’t keep the smile off her face.
Until she reached the pier…
And the sailboat tethered at the end of it.
The familiar tremble started, low in her stomach, and she could feel Jake glance her way.
Raising her chin, she marched to the edge of the wood planks… and promptly froze.
Jake stepped into the craft, one foot on the edge, one anchored in the cockpit. He reached for her.
She didn’t move.
“Come on. I’ve got you. You can do it.”
Carla hesitated, her hand in Jake’s, her feet still on the pier. She knew it would come to this, facing her fear, standing toe-to-toe with her guilt. The memories hit her, and she pulled in a long, deep breath.
“It was my fault, Jake.”
“What was?”
“That day on the Sound when I was twelve.”
“You fell off a sailboat. How is that your fault?”
Carla had replayed that day in her mind many times. The cold water. The helplessness. But she didn’t dwell on the moments leading up to it. She didn’t let herself think about that. “All my father’s attention was focused on his new girlfriend. Like he’d already moved on, not just from Mom, but me, too. I tried to tell them some of the stuff I’d learned about Mount Rainier, about the ocean, but it was like he couldn’t even hear me, like I wasn’t speaking at all.”
“He didn’t notice you fell overboard?”
“No, he noticed.”
Jake narrowed his eyes in an unspoken question.
“I don’t remember deciding to do it until I was already falling. Even then, I just remember thinking that maybe then he’d feel bad that he didn’t listen to me. Maybe once I was gone, he’d remember I existed.”
“Oh, Carla.” He reached up, smoothed a strand of hair back from her cheek. “You were twelve. Twelve year olds do that kind of stuff. You’ve got to forgive yourself.”
She knew he was right, that the fears she’d clung to all these years were some kind of version of her punishing herself. She saw that now. But her eyes filled with tears all the same.
“Carla, if you want to wait, do this another time, we can.”
“No. I’ve been waiting long enough.”
He nodded and squeezed her hand. “I got you.”
She raised her chin and stepped onto the boat.
The world shifted and rolled under her, and Jake wrapped an arm around her waist.
“Okay?” he asked.
Not sure her voice would work, she nodded.
“Want to sit down?”
“I think I should.”
He guided her down the step and into the cockpit, settling her on one of the cushioned bench seats. “Ready to move away from the pier?” he asked.
Carla wiped her palms on her jeans. Although her heart was pounding so fast she couldn’t tell one beat from the next and she couldn’t quite get enough oxygen, she hadn’t succumbed to a full-out panic attack yet. “Go ahead.”
Jake slipped behind the wheel, and the engine chugged to life.
The boat moved slowly, nothing scary there, and as the chug, chug, chug moved them away from shore, Carla started feeling better. Lighter.
About a hundred yards into the lake, Jake switched off the ignition and dropped the anchor. Then he slid onto the bench beside Carla and took her hand in his. “Okay?”
Carla actually managed a smile. “Surprisingly, yes.”
“I’m not surprised.”
“I don’t know how you do it.”
“Do what?”
“See more in me than I can see in myself.”
“I just see what’s in front of me.” He brought her close for a kiss, their tongues dancing together, slow and deep.
When the kiss ended, he shot her a decadent grin. The wind tossed his hair, making him look downright rakish. “Are you wet, Carla?” he asked.
She didn’t have to check. “Drenched.”
“Ready for part two?”
Carla nodded, not sure her voice would work.
Jake reached into the picnic basket. When he turned back to her, the ball gag dangled from his fingers.
Carla stared at it, imagining the feel of it in her mouth, the forced silence, the helplessness. Then she pulled her gaze away and focused on Jake.
“Do you want it, Carla?”
A shiver seized her, fear and arousal and challenge all blended together. “I want it bad, Jake.”
He smiled. “So do I.”
DuChamp is the pen name of two bestselling authors. Combined, they’ve sold over six million books. Their identities are secret, but you could probably figure it out with a Google search.
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Fifty Shades of Alice in Wonderland
Fifty Shades of Alice Through the Looking Glass
Fifty Shades of Alice at the Hellfire Club
The Complete Fifty Shades of Alice (all three titles)
The Sexperts 1: Fifty Grades of Shay
The Sexperts 2: The Girl with the Pearl Necklace
The Sexperts 3: Loving the Alien
The Complete Sexperts (all three titles)
Adventures of Jezebel: Fifty Shades of Jezebel and the Beanstalk
Adventures of Jezebel: Fifty Shades of Puss in Boots
Adventures of Jezebel: Fifty Shades of Goldilocks
The Complete Adventures of Jezebel (all three titles)
BEYOND 50 SHADES OF GREY…
Eighteen-year-old Alice is unhappy. Her boyfriend is nice and polite, but he’s also quick and careless in bed, and doesn’t give Alice the attention and variety she craves. But he’s not entirely to blame, because Alice herself doesn’t understand her own needs. She’s heard about what sex is supposed to be like, but has never felt anything remotely close to what she’s read about in runaway bestselling books.
BEYOND 9 1/2 WEEKS…
Then Alice follows a vibrating white rabbit down a deep, dark hole, which leads to a place beyond her wildest imagination. There are no nice boys—or girls—down here. Only those who indulge in secret, forbidden, kinky fantasies.
BEYOND PRIDE AND PREJUDICE AND ZOMBIES…
Alice is confused and frightened and… aroused. She is bound. Teased. Spanked. Toyed. Brought to the limits of sexual endurance. And during her trials, she begins to understand her body’s needs for the very first time.
BEYOND THUNDERDOME…
This isn’t the fairy tale you grew up reading. This isn’t for children at all.
This is for those with dark desires, who wish to explore erotic excess beyond the plain vanilla of everyday life. Follow Alice down the rabbit hole, if you dare…
FIFTY SHADES OF ALICE IN WONDERLAND WAS JUST THE BEGINNING…
Eighteen-year-old Alice recently had an unprecedented erotic experience. But her adventures have only just begun to heat up.
NOW SHE MUST TRAVEL THROUGH THE LOOKING GLASS…
After breaking up with her boyfriend, Lewis, Alice enters a strange fantasy world where every pleasure—no matter how kinky—is indulged.
INTO TOTAL ECSTASY!! WITH TWO EXCLAMATION POINTS!!
Alice is subjected to amorous escapades beyond her wildest dreams, and taken to the very limit of sexual endurance. During her carnal encounters with all manner of men and women, she is teased to tears by a bondage master, thoroughly used in a three way, enlightened to the sensual joys of a female touch, taken to a sex shop to test different erotic toys, given several very special piercings, and is dragged to the Hall of Denied Orgasms where she must fight the frumious Jabbercocky to save all of Looking Glass Land. And you know what we mean by “fight”…
This is for those with dark desires, who wish to explore erotic excess beyond the plain vanilla of everyday life. Follow Alice through the looking glass, if you dare…
When unhappy Jezebel is rescued from a terrible blind date by a cute waiter with magic beans, she thinks she must be dreaming. But once she’s in a land filled with mythical beings, hot and eager suitors, and more orgasms than she’s able to handle, Jezzy learns the true meaning of “happy ending.”
Written by the author of the bestseller
50 SHADES OF ALICE IN WONDERLAND
,
JEZEBEL AND THE BEANSTALK
features the same hysterical humor, heated sexual encounters, and romantic escapades readers have come to demand from Melinda DuChamp.
It’s erotica for smart people who like to laugh, just like you.
WANT IT BAD
Copyright © 2014
Cover art copyright © 2014
This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidents are either products of the author’s imagination or used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events, locales, or persons, either living or dead is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this publication can be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, without express permission in writing.