West For Love (A Mail Order Romance Novel) (5 page)

“Are you okay?” Mary called to her.

“Yes,” Anna said. “I’m shocked...”

“I’m not,” Mary said. “I told you
he’d write back.”

Anna found strength in her legs
again and took a step towards Mary.

“What does it say?”

“It’s not my mail to open,” Mary
said. She smiled big and placed the letter on the table.

“You can open it,” Anna said. “Read
it. Tell me.”

“No. I refuse. It’s your mail.”

“What if he doesn’t want me?” Anna
asked. “I’m not sure I...”

“What if he does?” Mary posed.

Anna touched the envelope and
looked at the handwriting on it. It wasn’t Josephine’s perfect handwriting. It
was Thomas’s choppy, scribbling writing. This was directly from him. Part of
Anna always thought that it would be Josephine to write back on Thomas’s
behalf.

But this was from Thomas.

Anna slid her finger along the
envelope, opening it.

She unfolded the piece of paper and
began to read.

Dearest
Anna -

I
am still unsure of the words I have read from you. Not that I doubt what you’ve
said, but I doubt someone as gracious and beautiful as yourself could
experience something as terrible as a man abandoning you. I told Josephine the
letter must have been a joke or written by a ghost... how could someone exist
that understands me? I’m not sure I expected a response to my letter but one
came. Now I must face what comes next. My dear Anna, if it were up to me, there
would be money with this letter for you to come to Kansas to be with me.
Josephine even urged me to do so. She even tried to slip her own money into the
letter when I wasn’t looking! But I couldn’t send money this time. That would
imply your travel to me and your marriage to me. It would imply you packing up
your life and leaving. Which I cannot do... at least like this. I hope you
don’t take my words the wrong way, but I wanted to give you a chance to read
this letter, dear Anna, and make a decision. You wrote to me. I wrote back. If
you write to me again the next letter will contain money. This gives you a
chance to truly consider everything. My life. My infant son. My broken heart.

If
you decide not to write back, I will never be upset with you, dear Anna. Your
letter alone has given me a sense of hope only staring in Thomas Jr.’s eyes has
ever done. I thank you for that.

Sincerely,

Thomas

Anna handed the letter to Mary.

“Read it,” Anna said.

Mary looked at the letter, putting
her glasses on. As she read, Anna began to pace. She saw a piece of paper on
the table, right next to a pen. She smiled like she hadn’t smiled in years.

When Mary finished the letter, she
looked up and closed her eyes. Anna saw her lips moving, knowing she was
praying.

“I knew it,” Mary said. Her eyes
were glazed over. “I just knew it...”

“I guess I have a decision to
make,” Anna said.

“Anna, I don’t want to be pushy,”
Mary said. “But if you wait...”

Anna handed Mary a piece of paper.

“What’s this?” Mary asked.

“My response. I wrote it while you
were reading.”

“May I?” Mary asked.

“Of course.”

Mary opened the letter and Anna
thought about her response to Thomas.

Dear
Thomas,

Your
letter has changed my life already. If I’ve given you hope, you’ve done the
same for me. I’ve stood at the window every morning for weeks, waiting for your
response.

I
won’t waste any of your time, Thomas. We will have the rest of our lives now to
exchange words and conversation, in person, as husband and wife.

I
can assure you I won’t sleep a wink until I’m with you. And I mean that in a
way that my heart will be racing with excitement to meet you, to meet
Josephine, and of course, Thomas Jr.

I
will accept your hand in marriage, Thomas.

-Anna

Mary hurried to place Anna’s letter
into an envelope. She then took Anna’s hand and walked Anna to the post office.
Again, Mary paid for the postage. Anna insisted on paying, but Mary refused.

That’s when Anna realized that
maybe for every bad person in the world, a good one existed... and that maybe
for every tragedy that occurred, a miracle followed right with it.

To give hope.

To give love.

To continue life.

Chapter Six

Anna played with her fingertips. A
sewing kit sat next to her on the bed. She needed to fix another pair of pants
for her father. The man had become so obsessed with working in the fields that
it seemed he refused to come home unless he was injured or had torn a piece of
his clothing. Anna could only contribute this to his anger over the fate of his
daughters. She hoped that when her family realized she was gone, they’d have
hope. And then when Anna would send a letter from Kansas, explaining what she
had done, they would smile again. They would become normal again.

When Abigail entered the room, Anna
stood from the bed and pointed.

“Sit,” she said. “It’s your turn.”

“My turn? For what?”

“To sew.”

“I’m not very good...”

“Practice,” Anna said.

Abigail stopped and stared at Anna.
“Why? Why can’t you just do it? Are you leaving?”

Anna turned and let out a small
laugh. It had been next to impossible to contain her feelings and excitement.
She had managed to keep herself busy for weeks, waiting for  Thomas to send a
reply with the money needed for a train ticket. She worked extra hard in the
house, hoping to get it into a condition that would last for a while after she
left. She took the time to look at her family and think of good memories rather
than bad times and the hurtful atmosphere she had been forced to live in for a
long time now.

But now she had it all.

Thomas had replied, and fast.

As said, he included money with the
letter. More than enough to take the train. He encouraged her to buy herself a
new dress to wear to be extra comfortable and to enjoy food on her travels. He
made it that Anna’s only focus should be on the situation waiting for her.

All Anna had to do was be at the
train depot the next morning to catch the second train of the day, the one that
would ultimately take her to Kansas.

“Abigail, are you happy?” Anna
asked.

“Happy? Well, there’s all kinds of
happiness.”

“Like how?”

“Well, I’m happy I’m alive. I’m
happy I’m fed. I’m happy we have a roof that doesn’t leak when it rains. I’m
happy we have a warm place for the winter. I’m happy the crops have grown again
this year.”

“What about at night?” Anna asked.
“When you’re alone... does everything hurt then?”

“Why are you asking me this?”

“I want to make things right,” Anna
said. “I’ve let everyone down, Abigail, including you.”

“I’m sorry for what I said before,”
Abigail said. “I spoke rash and it came out wrong. What I meant was that if you
were able to fall in love with a man like William, without your entire heart,
then maybe I could find the same. I want a family, Anna. I want a husband. I
just don’t know how...”

Anna looked at her sister. She
thought for a second about telling her about Mary and Henry and what they did.
Abigail deserved that, right? But Anna worried that if both she and her sister
ran off, it would maybe be too much for their parents to handle. And the look
in Abigail’s eyes told Anna she wasn’t ready yet. In time, she would be, just
not yet.

“That’s how I feel too,” Anna said.
With that off her chest, she knew it would be the closest to telling her sister
what was about to happen in her life. “Can you try to sew that?”

Abigail touched the pants and then
looked at Anna. She didn’t say a word but instead began to thread a needle. It
took Abigail much longer then it would have taken Anna, but Anna’s patience
were made of steel. There were times when her fingers twitched, wanting to take
the needle and thread from Abigail, but she knew she couldn’t do that. She
needed to hold off. By tomorrow evening, Anna wouldn’t be there. There would be
no extra help.

Once the needle was threaded,
Abigail began to sew. Anna sat next to her sister and spent the next hour
giving her tips on how to make the stitching tight. How to tie off the end and
tuck it. What kind of material she liked to use. Anna tried to keep it casual
as though nothing was really happening, but she knew Abigail could read right
through the feeble attempt.

Abigail stood from the bed and held
the pants up.

“They look good now,” she said.
“He’ll be happy.”

“He doesn’t notice,” Anna said.
“Neither of them do. Whether you cook, clean, fix things...”

Abigail folded the pants and placed
them on the bed. “I’m sorry it hurts.”

“Me too.”

“I hope you find your happiness,
Anna.”

“I’m sure I will,” Anna smiled.

Abigail reached for Anna’s hand.

“I hope you know I love you,”
Abigail said. “I’ll be sure to make sure your love remains and that my smiles
do too.”

“Abigail...”

“I always thought by now I’d have
children of my own,” Abigail said. “I would be traveling home to visit here, to
visit you, Anna, or perhaps exchanging letters. That works too, right? Writing
letters? You’d do that for me, wouldn’t you?”

Anna saw the look in her sister’s
eyes. It was no longer a big secret.

“Of course I’ll write,” Anna said.
“Or... I would write.”

Abigail giggled. “Sleep tight.”

Anna turned and watched her sister
walk towards the door.  She stopped at the door and turned.

“Just so you know, Anna, you might
want to hide your suitcase better...”

Abigail pointed and Anna saw her
suitcase right there, standing against the wall, out in the open.

Abigail left the room for good and
Anna hurried to hide the suitcase.

She felt almost foolish but
couldn’t contain the smile on her face. That smile stayed with Anna through a
quick night of sleep and into the morning. From there, each step she took and
each activity she did, she told herself it was the last time she’d be doing it.
From making breakfast to kissing her father’s cheek as he went off the work in
the fields to standing on the porch and smelling the air of Lowemills,
Massachusetts. Right on time, Anna went to Abigail and asked if she wanted to
go to town for a few items. Abigail agreed. The entire ride was silent until
they were close to the center of town.

“Where am I stopping?” Abigail
asked.

“You can stop right here actually,”
Anna said.

“Are you sure? You’re going to
walk...”

“I’m fine,” Anna said.

Abigail looked at Anna and the two
hugged.

“I think I’m going to check the
horse,” Abigail said. “He seemed to be trotting funny.”

“Sure,” Anna said.

It was the last time Anna would see
her sister’s perfect face. That angelic face - perfect skin, bright blue eyes,
warm smile.

Abigail climbed from the carriage
as did Anna. Anna uncovered her suitcase and took it from the carriage, moving
so Abigail didn’t see. Of course Abigail knew what was happening, but there was
something sad about her sister seeing it and actually knowing. Anna snuck away
from the carriage and hurried with her suitcase in front of her. She knew she
must have looked like she was waddling, but she didn’t stop until she heard the
sound of the horse trotting and the wood of the carriage creaking as it moved.
The sound pained Anna for a few moments because it meant her sister was
leaving. It also reminded her of her parents financial situation. If Anna had
been with William, and had given him a child, they wouldn’t have such an old
carriage.

But none of that could matter
anymore.

Anna rushed down to the train
depot. She passed the small newspaper office and thought about running in to
say goodbye to Mary and Henry one more time, but decided against it. She didn’t
have the time to spare and she knew Mary expected their next correspondence to
be in a handwritten letter and signed by Mrs. Thomas Calhor. 

Anna
Calhor.

It made Anna gush. It sounded so
much better than
Anna
Strewbren
.

At the train depot, everything went
as planned. She boarded the train with a smile on her face and a new dream in
her eye. When the train was full, the whistle blew, and less than a minute
later, the train began to move. Anna clutched her new dress (the one neither of
her parents  noticed...) and she closed her eyes for a few seconds and replayed
everything that had brought her to that very moment. From the night William
took her hand and demanded her hand in marriage. To the feeling in her stomach
each month, letting her family down. To William’s forced divorce. To Henry’s
gentle touch and Mary’s even gentler care. And now to this... the train going
full speed ahead.

On to Kansas.

Taking Anna to become wife to
Thomas and mother to Thomas Jr.

Chapter Seven

When the train came to its final
stop, there was one last long whistle, the squeak of brakes, and a quick jerk.
Anna’s mouth instantly ran dry as she reached for her suitcase. She had nobody
with her, nobody to help her, guide her, or tell her how to find Thomas. Not
once did he really describe himself in great detail. It was left that he would
find her at the train depot.

As Anna stepped from the train, among
the mass of the crowd of people getting off the train and those waiting to see
their friends or family, she began to panic.