West For Love (A Mail Order Romance Novel) (6 page)

What
if Thomas didn’t show?

How sad to think that.

But a man lost in grief could
justify anything. Not that Anna wouldn’t be hurt but it was more of how to get
back home then and explain herself. She made sure not to spend all the money
Thomas had sent, wanting to give some back to him to show that her love didn’t
need to purchased through the exchange of money or material goods. But she
really hoped she didn’t need that leftover money to make her way back home.

It would be perhaps worse than the
divorce from William if she went back home and explained herself. How she wrote
to a man and he wrote back. How she accepted his hand in marriage without
meeting him. How she left without really saying goodbye. Then it occurred to
Anna that her parents probably wouldn’t take her back then.

The thoughts poured into Anna’s
frail mind, and just as she felt ready to cry, a hand touched her shoulder.

“Beautiful Anna,” a voice said.

Anna frowned.

It wasn’t a man’s voice.

It was a woman’s voice.

Anna turned and met eyes with a
robust dark eyed woman. She had a big smile and a large gap between her front
teeth. At first, Anna wasn’t sure why she picked out such random features on
the woman, but then she realized that she had been dying not only to place a
face to Thomas but a face to Josephine.

And here she was...

“Yes, I’m Anna,” Anna whispered.

“Of course you are,” the woman
said. “Nobody else around here comes close to being as beautiful. Or as
nervous!”

Anna smiled. “I’m sorry. I was just
scared for a second. I thought for a moment nobody would be here... silly, I
know.”

“Not so much,” the woman said. “I
came though.”

“Not Thomas?”

The woman didn’t respond to the
question. “Do you know who I am?”

“I’m assuming you’re Josephine
,
” Anna said.

“Call me Jo,” Josephine said.

“But you said someone could only
call you that if they made you laugh.”

“You did make me laugh,” Josephine
said, wrapping her arm around Anna’s shoulder.

Anna felt Jo’s warm body and had
almost the same feeling she had when near Mary. It was no wonder Thomas’s
infant son took to Josephine.

“When did I make you laugh?” Anna
asked.

“In your letter. How you said it
would be easier to write Jo instead of Josephine. I laughed. Now you can call
me Jo.”

“Fair enough,” Anna said.

“Plus, you’re the only one to write
back to Thomas.”

“Well, that wasn’t on accident,”
Anna said. “The woman who handles this...”

“I understand,” Jo said. “I
expected tons of letters from women looking to take advantage of Thomas. I read
your letter before he got it. Hope that doesn’t upset you.”

“Not at all.”

“Good.”

Anna walked alongside Jo as they
made their way from the train depot. When she boarded the carriage and they
began their travel to Thomas’s home -
what
would be Anna’s new home!
- something continued to bother Anna. She
knew she could have swallowed it down and held it in, but did she want that?
Did she really want to be the same old person?

“Jo, may I ask a question?” Anna
asked.

“Sure. And you don’t have to be so
proper around me. I work for you now, too. Keep that in mind.”

Anna nodded and digested that
statement.

“It’s a personal question,” Anna
said. “If it oversteps a boundary.”

“Never.”

“Why didn’t Thomas come to get me?
His letter left me thinking he’d be there, waiting.”

Jo didn’t reply right away.

“He didn’t want to see me?” Anna
asked.

“It’s not that...”

“I would appreciate your honesty in
return of mine,” Anna said.

Jo looked at Anna and nodded. “Yes,
ma’am. That I can do.”

It took a few more minutes for Jo
to speak.

“You see, Anna, when I met Thomas,
he was... he was broken. I firmly believed in my heart for more than a minute
that Thomas was going to leave without Thomas Jr. I explained it was his only
way of staying with his wife. And it’s part of the reason why I’m with that
infant now. I wake each morning and sometimes fear I’ll find Thomas’s bed empty
with a note. Maybe I’m thinking too much into it, but the pain behind his eyes
is something... something fierce. He feared, Anna, that once you looked at him,
you’d rush back to the train.”

“I would never!” Anna cried out.
“Even if he wasn’t the most attractive man... or if he had a scar on his
face... or...”

“I understand,” Jo said. “But
that’s the truth. He’s torn right now, Anna. He never believed he’d have the
chance to love again and now you’re on your way to his home. To become
everything he thought he once had. That’s hard.”

“Same for me too,” Anna whispered.

The mood had shifted from
excitement to somber. Then Jo nudged Anna and smiled.

“What?” Anna asked.

“If I may say so, Anna, Thomas is a
very handsome man. Trust me, don’t let him slip away. For anything.”

Jo winked and Anna blushed.

It helped to lighten the mood for
the rest of the hour ride to Thomas’s property.

Jo announced the beginning of the
property well before the house came into view. The house was picturesque, a
house that wasn’t a house at all. It was a home. A beautiful porch that looked
wide enough for rocking chairs... which came into view a minute or so later.
The front yard was large and open. The tree line around the land looked
immaculate, like the place belonged in a photograph. Next to the house was all
the farmland.

And there was plenty of it.

“Does Thomas have help?” Anna
asked.

“His two hands and one heart,” Jo
said. “Well, part of a heart I guess...”

The comment touched Anna. A man
that tended to the massive fields next to the chores, the amount of crops able
to be grown shouldn’t have surprised Anna at the position and home Thomas found
himself in. She almost started to hate herself for even being there. Self doubt
took two seconds to step.

Anna wondered if she would be good
enough to live in the house, tend to the house, take care of Thomas Jr., and find
a way to connect with Thomas. The horse came to a sudden halt, and tears filled
Anna’s eyes.

“This is why Thomas didn’t want to
come either,” Jo said. “And I agreed with him. Which is why I came to get you.
Look at me, dear Anna.”

Anna looked at Jo. She didn’t hold
anything back then.

“You’re afraid, aren’t you?”

“What if I am? This house is
beautiful. Nothing looks broken.”

“But it is,” Jo said. “And you can
fix it.”

Jo touched Anna’s shoulder and gave
her a minute to collect herself.

“I’m sorry,” Anna said. “It has
been a long journey. I left my house without saying goodbye to anyone. I’m just
caught up in it all.”

“That’s fine. Now, let’s go meet
your husband to be.”

The words brought a smile to Anna’s
face. Jo hurried from the carriage to tend to Anna. Anna tried to refuse help,
but Jo insisted.

“I don’t mean to blunt,” Anna said,
“but aren’t you supposed to be a wet nurse?”

“That’s what I’m paid for,” Jo
said. “The rest of this is out of the goodness of my heart. I can’t raise that infant
into a child. Into a boy. Into a man. My job will come to an end soon enough
and I’m hoping by then Thomas Jr. has the family he was meant to have.”

Anna stepped towards Jo and wrapped
her arms around the woman. She couldn’t believe she did such a sudden move but
she had to. Jo deserved it and then some. What a big hearted woman.

After the hug ended, Anna lifted
her suitcase and turned. She let out a gasp and then a cry. She felt Jo’s hand
at her back, keeping her from stumbling back.

There, on the porch, stood the most
handsome man Anna had ever seen in her life. He stood in a short sleeved shirt
and Anna first noticed how well built he was. A man of  earned muscle. Next
came his face, the line of his jaw defined and complete with stubble. His lips
were thin -
and looked
soft!
- and his eyes were dark. His black hair was short and sort of
messy, but it looked good on him. It fit him.

He looked like a Thomas.

Anna walked another two steps
before Thomas moved from the porch. He put out a large hand and said, “Let me
get that for you.”

His voice fit both his look and the
personality of his letters. Anna blinked frantically. What was the first thing
she should say to her soon to be husband?

Thomas stopped walking right before
Anna and left his hand out for her to take.

“I’m Thomas,” he said.

“An... na...,” Anna managed to say
as if she had a speech impediment.

Thomas raised an eyebrow and then
looked at Jo.

“She’s tired,” Jo said. “All that
traveling and all my talking. Let me get the suitcase, you can get your bride.”

At the word
bride
Anna felt her
cheeks reddened. The same woozy feeling she felt the day Thomas first wrote to
her hit her knees again. She had no wall to lean on and when she started to go
down, all she could picture was messing her new dress, the one Thomas had sent
money for her to buy.

“Whoa,” Thomas said as his big,
strong arms scooped Anna up at the last second.

One hand touched between Anna’s
shoulders, the other at her lower back.

“Are you okay?”

Anna nodded.

“I like your dress,” Thomas said.
“Is that new?”

Anna nodded again.

Thomas helped Anna stand. He then
slid his hands off her and started to walk. Anna walked alongside him and kept
looking down at his hand. Just hanging there. Anna wanted to grab. But she
didn’t. She respected the situation and knew it was up to Thomas to make those
kinds of moves.

“Your house is beautiful,” Anna
said, the real first thing she said to Thomas.

“Thank you,” Thomas said. “A lot of
work went into the house. The land has been fertile from the day I planted the
first seed. A real blessing.”

Anna smiled. It seemed odd to hear
Thomas use the word
blessing
considering all that he had gone through.

At the porch Thomas paused and
allowed Anna to walk up to the house first. Anna looked back and down at Thomas
and noticed how long his face suddenly appeared.

“I have something for you,” Anna
said. “In my suitcase. I’d like to give it to you.”

“Sure,” Thomas said. “We’ll get
there. Why don’t you go meet my son. I have to get back to work.”

Thomas didn’t look ready to work,
but Anna knew that when it came to tending land there weren’t options. You
either took care of the land or didn’t. Thomas stared at Anna for a few more
seconds and Anna waited to see if there was anything else to say.

There wasn’t.

Thomas turned and slowly walked
towards the large fields.

Anna took a deep breath and crossed
the threshold of her new home by herself. It was exactly how she envisioned to
pass through into such a beautiful home, but she carefully reminded herself of
why she was there. Of what events that had taken place to bring her there and
to allow Thomas the chance to marry again.

A small cry echoed and Anna smiled.

found the infant in Jo’s arms as
she stood in the kitchen. The second Anna saw him, her heart melted and began
to reshape itself. The baby blinked and stared at Anna, almost a perfect copy
of Thomas. The shape of the baby’s head, the dark hair, the eyes, the face.

“This is Thomas Jr.,” Jo said.

“He’s beautiful,” Anna said. “Oh
my...”

“Yes he is,” Jo said.

Thomas Jr. let out another wail and
Jo started to bounce him.

“He’s also very hungry right now,”
Jo said. “Would you like to assist me for a second?”

“Of course,” Anna said. “Do you
have a room...?”

“Doesn’t matter to me,” Jo said.
She then turned her head and looked out the window to the fields. “But for this
time, let’s go to my room. I put your suitcase there for right now. I’ll let
Thomas properly show you to your room.”

Jo had a little smile on her face
and Anna wasn’t sure if that smile came with implications. Just thinking about
being in a bedroom with Thomas gave Anna an odd feeling in her body. She was
obviously instantly attracted to Thomas, his look and physique much greater than
William.

In the bedroom, Jo sat on a small
bed, holding Thomas. She looked at the baby then at Anna.

“Here, hold him for a second,” Jo
said.

Not a question but a request.

Anna stiffened and hesitated.

“He doesn’t bite,” Jo teased.
“Trust me, I’d know if there were teeth!”

Anna giggled and her cheeks flushed
again. She reached for the infant, holding him by his sides and pulling him
towards her. She gently held Thomas Jr., feeling her heart race in a way it
hadn’t in a long, long time. It was holding life. It was holding something that
meant so much more than just a baby. Anna closed her eyes and smelled the baby.
That warm, fresh smell. Anna hadn’t had much experience with babies and it
still made her mind scramble to think she was supposed to be a mother to this
one.

Thomas Jr. started to move, making
noises as he did so. His arms moved in opposite directions to his legs. Anna
hugged the baby and began to rock left to right.

It did nothing to comfort Thomas
Jr.

An idea came to Anna.

She’d whistle to the baby. She
thought about how Henry had complimented her whistling back in Lowemills. That
almost felt like a lifetime ago.

Anna licked her lips and blew one
note before Thomas Jr. jumped and let out a wailing cry.

She had scared the baby.

There was no helping Thomas Jr.
now.

“Oh, that’s fine,” Jo said. “He’s
just very hungry.”