What Now? (16 page)

Nick
paced up and down, feeling as if the dressing room was closing in on him. They
were going onstage in minutes and he couldn’t seem to shake the anxiety that
was threatening to overwhelm him. His shoulders and neck felt like rock and his
stomach churned. Not the best way to start a show. Logically, he knew that it
was not likely that what had happened in Chicago would be repeated in Miami,
but his mind was not co-operating. A quiet knock at the door startled him and
he shook his head as he realized how keyed up he was. Opening the door, he was
glad to see Shari on the other side.

“Hi.
Can I come in?”

“Sure.
I could use the company.”

“I
figured you might be finding it hard to get back in the saddle.”

“You’re
right. I know in my head that this place is safe, but I can’t help feeling
anxious. I’ll be fine once I get on the stage.”

“Yes,
so stop worrying. ‘Be anxious for nothing’.” She quoted.

“Thanks.
I’m trying not to be.” He rubbed at the knots in his shoulders. Shari almost
offered to rub them for him, but bit back her words. The last thing she needed
was to be rubbing Nick’s shoulders, especially after what had happened by the
Jacuzzi. She’d managed to avoid him the day before, instead spending time
chatting with Simon, the base player, and with Brad.

“Thanks
for stopping by. You look great, Shar!”

So it
was Shar again. The black, hot pink and white patterned dress that wrapped
around her and tied at the waist showed more cleavage than she normally would.
Nick’s eyes didn’t miss anything as they thoroughly checked her out.

“Thanks,”
said Shari, adjusting the neckline by drawing the sides closer together. Nick
smiled at her modesty.

“OK,
on stage in five minutes,” the stage manager called through the door, making
his rounds of the dressing rooms.

“Go
do your thing,” Shari encouraged him, opening the door. He nodded, stepping
into the hallway and closing the door behind them.

Shari
backed out of the way as the dressing rooms opened and the other guys poured
into the hallway and headed for the stage. Steve slapped Paul on the back in
encouragement as they mounted the stairs to the stage. Adrenaline coursed
through Nick’s veins, washing away the anxiety and creating an eagerness to be
on the stage again. This was what he lived for; this was what it was all about.

The
guys took their positions on the darkened stage and waited for their cue.

“Miami,
you’ve waited patiently and now your time has come. Nick Badley is in Miami!”

The
place erupted in screams as the stage was flooded with lights. Nick looked out
at the thousands of excited fans and, for a brief moment, was in awe that they
had come to see him, Nick Badley, from the small town of Sonora, California.
The brief surreal moment passed and he became one with the music, losing
himself in it and allowing it to possess him and transform him into Nick Bad.

Shari
watched from the wings again and released the breath that she didn’t even
realize she was holding once she saw Nick take control of the stage and the
audience. He would be fine. This was his life. This was the Nick Badley that
the world knew. The one who was almost sick with tension in his dressing room
and the one who had comforted her in the hotel in Chicago were far removed from
this one, but she now realized that they were not separate people; they were
all facets of Nick. Take them or leave them.

After
the first session, a high energy performance that had the crowd dancing and
singing along, the lights dimmed until there was a single beam spotting on
Nick. He sat on a high stool near the front of the stage with an acoustic
guitar which he began to strum softly.

“I
want to dedicate this song to the people who lost their lives and those who
were injured as they tried to get into our concert in Chicago. As the lives of
their families will forever be changed by that tragedy, our lives will forever
be changed and they will always have a place in our hearts. It’s called ‘Place
in my heart’. Let’s light this place.”

All
over the arena, specks of light from the thousands of tiny flashlights that
were given out at the gate turned the blackness into a sky filled with stars.
There was total silence as Nick began to sing. Shari didn’t even realize that
tears were running down her face as Nick shared the anguish he felt when he
heard about the deaths.

“…And
though I didn’t know you from the start, you’ll always have a place in my
heart.”  He wiped his own cheeks and bent his head as the stage went black.
There was a moment of silence as if the crowd was too emotional to respond and
then thunderous applause split the silence and lasted until Nick left the stage
to get ready for the second half of the show.

“Wow,”
Lily whispered reverently next to her.

“Wow,”
Shari agreed. She was moved beyond words at the new depth that Nick had
revealed on the stage as he allowed his fans to see beneath the performer to
the person that was Nick Badley. Something shifted in her heart to make room
for Nick.

Shari
didn’t know how the rest of the show would flow after the way the first half
had ended, but when Nick returned to the stage it was as if the song had helped
him to release something that had been holding him back. He performed with such
freedom and abandon that no one could dispute he had given his all to them and
their screams of delight showed how much they appreciated it.

After
two encores, he and the band finally left the stage and staggered down the
stairs to be greeted with hugs from Lily and high fives from Brad and the crew.
The noise level was almost as high as when they were on stage and Brian was in
the midst of everything, filming the euphoria, while Shari hung back from the
celebration. Technically, she wasn’t working (although she was making mental
observations of things to add to the documentary) and since she wasn’t part of
the crew, she wasn’t quite sure where she fit in so she stayed in the background.

Nick
looked around and, seeing Shari on the fringes, pushed his way over to her and
grabbed her hand, pulling her with him to his dressing room. Lily silently
watched them with a question on her face. Nick had certainly come a long way
from protesting about having to do the documentary. Shari had apparently made
some significant inroads into gaining his trust. She seemed like a nice girl so
Lily hoped that Nick would be careful with her heart.

Nick
closed the door behind them and gave Shari a quick celebratory hug. She didn’t
protest as she knew he was still on a high because he had faced his fears and
won.

“That
was amazing, Nick. I think this was your best concert that I’ve seen, although
it’s only my fifth.”

“You
mean to say that you’d never been to one of my concerts before Vegas?” he
teased. “Actually, I think it was one of my best concerts ever too and God
knows I’ve done a lot,” he agreed without any modesty. “I feel as if I faced a
huge mountain and conquered it. My fear is gone. That is amazing. Your prayers
must be working.”

“Glad
you know who is responsible.”

“Yes,
I do.”

Heading
to a rack with clothes hanging on it, he selected a black button shirt with
long sleeves and a pair of black pants. It was the most formal outfit that
she’d seen him wear so far.

“You’re
dressing up tonight for the party?”

“Yes,
for a change and I see that I’ll have to keep you next to me all night so that
the men don’t try to make moves on you. You look very beautiful.”

“Thank
you. You’re prepared to give up the attentions of your adorning female fans to
keep me safe from predatory men?” 

“Yes,
I am prepared to give up all adorning females for you.” He sounded sincere.
Shari chose not to place any hope in his claim.

“Yeah,
right! I bet you say that to all the girls. I’ll leave you to shower and get
dressed. See you later.” She let herself out the door and went to find Lily.

Nick
peeled off his T-shirt and headed for the shower in his dressing room. He’d
told Shari that he was prepared to give up his adoring female fans for her, but
was he? She was different from any other woman he knew and there was a goodness
about her that appealed to him but, from what she’d said, she was into marriage.
He was into one night stands. Hell, he’d barely known her for two weeks. It was
crazy to even have her and marriage in the same thought. After all, he’d
married Patti a month after they’d met and look how that had ended. Thank God
for pre-nupts.

The
party was in full swing by the time Nick made it. Before he could even properly
cross the threshold, he was swamped by three women in revealing cocktail
dresses. It was as if they’d been waiting for him. They reminded Nick of
vultures, circling to get the choicest morsel first which, apparently, was him,
in this case. 

“Hi,
Nick. Great concert tonight.”

“Yeah,
I got hot just watching you.” Not subtle this one, thought Nick.

“I’m
still hot.” Nor that one.

“Glad
to hear that, ladies.” He smiled. Were they for real?

A
minute later, a waiter brought him a drink. Sipping it, he realized that it was
his favorite. Someone had sent it over; probably Lily. This was the life.

Shari
observed the women competing for Nick’s attention from across the room as she
sipped a glass of red wine. It was a good thing she didn’t take Nick seriously
when he said he would be at her side. He was too much in demand to be by one
woman’s side, she thought wryly, returning her attention to the record
executive that she had been talking to. She wished he would address her face
and not her bosom when he spoke. She regretted that she had worn the dress. Had
she deliberately dressed to attract Nick? She didn’t want to answer that on the
grounds that it might incriminate her.

The
women had formed a barricade of sorts around him, preventing him from venturing
further into the room. They were pretty obvious, Nick thought, listening to
their inane conversation with one ear as he looked around the room. What Tim
said flashed into his mind.
They all want to make it with someone famous.
He knew it would take little effort if he wanted to leave with all three of
them. His eyes searched out Shari, who he knew would disapprove of even that
thought. The bright pink splashes in her dress made her easy to pick out across
the room. She was talking to Max Ryan, a middle-aged record executive whose
eyes seemed glued to her bosom. Time to intervene.

“Excuse
me, ladies, but I have to go and greet some of the other guests,” he said,
extricating himself from the group, particularly from one who felt it necessary
to plaster herself against his side.

“See
you later, Nick?” she asked hopefully. “We’d be happy to take good care of you.
All three of us,” she added against his ear before giving it a quick lick just
in case he didn’t get her meaning. Oh, he got it all right. He just wasn’t
interested.

“Thanks,
ladies. I’ll keep that in mind.” He didn’t plan to take up the offer. He hoped
Shari would be proud of him for passing up a night of potential debauchery.

“Nick
Badley. Were you really just going to walk right by me without even a kiss for
old time’s sake? Is that any way to treat your ex?”

“Patti.
What are you doing here?” It seemed as if his earlier thoughts had conjured her
up. He hadn’t seen her since the divorce and he was happy with that. He had to
admit that she looked good, but he felt no attraction to her. She seemed like a
stranger. Had they really been married? How long had it even lasted? A year?
What on earth had made him marry her in the first place, he wondered as he
exchanged his now empty glass for a full one of the same from the tray that
appeared next to him. Patti was sipping a glass of white wine.