What to expect when you're expecting (98 page)

Eat selectively.
In some regions, it may not be safe to eat raw unpeeled fruits or vegetables or salads. (Peel fruit yourself, washing the fruit first and your hands after peeling to avoid transferring germs to the fruit; bananas and oranges tend to be safer than other fruits because of their thick skins.) No matter where you roam, avoid cooked foods that are lukewarm or at room temperature, raw or undercooked meat, fish, and poultry, as well as unpasteurized or unrefrigerated dairy products and juice and food sold by street vendors, even if it’s hot. For complete information on such restrictions, on other foreign health hazards, and on immunizations for travel, contact the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s Traveler’s Hotline at (877) FYI-TRIP (394-8747. or at
www.cdc.gov/travel
. Travel warnings are also available from the State Department at (202) 647-5225 or at
travel.state.gov
.

Don’t drink the water (or even brush your teeth with it) unless you’re certain it’s safe.
If the purity of the water is questionable at your destination, plan to use bottled water for drinking and brushing (and always make sure the seal on the bottle cap is intact when you open it). Avoid ice, too, unless you are certain it wasmade from bottled or boiled water.

Don’t swim in the water, either.
In some areas, lakes and oceans may be polluted.
Check with the CDC about the waters at your destination to be sure of safety before taking a dip. Any pool you swim in should be properly chlorinated (a whiff will usually clue you in).

Pregnant Women Are Delicious

If mosquitoes seem to love snacking on you more than ever now that you’re pregnant, it’s not just your imagination. Scientists have found that pregnant women attract twice as many mosquitoes as nonpregnant women do, possibly because those pesky bugs are fond of carbon dioxide and pregnant women tend to take more frequent breaths, thereby releasing more of this mosquito-friendly gas. Another reason why mosquitoes make a beeline for expectant mothers: They’re heat-seeking, and expectant mothers generally have higher body temperatures, what with all that baby making going on. So if you live in or travel to an area where mosquitoes are a problem (especially if they pose a health risk), take proper precautions. You can avoid their bites by staying indoors in heavily mosquito-infested areas, by using tight-fitting screens on windows, and by using a non-DEET-based insect repellent.

Head off traveler’s irregularity.
Changes in schedule and diet can compound constipation problems. So make sure you get plenty of the three most effective constipation combaters: fiber, fluids, and exercise. It may also help to eat breakfast (or at least a morning snack) a little early so you’ll have time to use the bathroom before you set out for the day.

When you’ve gotta go, go.
Don’t encourage a UTI or constipation by postponing trips to the bathroom. Go as soon as you feel the urge (and can find a rest room).

Get the support you need.
Support hose, that is, particularly if you already suffer from varicose veins. But even if you only suspect you may be predisposed to them, consider wearing support hose when you’ll be doing a lot of sitting (in cars, planes, or trains, for example) and when you’ll be doing a lot of standing (in museums, in airport lines). They’ll also help minimize swelling in your feet and ankles.

Don’t be stationary while on the move.
Sitting for long periods can restrict the circulation in your legs, so be sure to shift in your seat frequently, and stretch, flex, wiggle, and massage your legs often—and avoid crossing your legs. If possible, take your shoes off and elevate your feet a bit. Get up at least every hour or two to walk the aisles when you are on a plane or train. When traveling by car, don’t go for more than two hours without stopping for a stretch and a stroll.

If you’re traveling by plane.
Check with the airline in advance to see if it has special regulations concerning pregnant women (many airlines do). Arrange ahead of time for a seat in the bulkhead (preferably on the aisle, so you can get up and stretch or use the rest room as needed), or if seating is not reserved, ask for preboarding.

When booking your flight, ask whether any meal will be served or available for purchase. More and more often, the so-called friendly skies are also the go-hungry skies. If the pickings will be slim (half an ounce of snack mix) at best, bring along a meal of your own (a sandwich or salad, for instance). Even if you will be scoring a meal, keep in mind that it may be (a. tiny (b) inedible (c) a long time in coming due to flight delays, or (d) all of the above. Pack snacks accordingly: cheese sticks or wedges, raw vegetables, fresh fruit, trail mix, dry cereal, some healthy chips. And don’t forget to drink plenty of bottled water (don’t drink airplane tap water or water that you suspect might have originated in the airplane tap), milk, and juice to counter the dehydration caused by air travel. This tactic will also encourage trips to the bathroom, which will ensure your legs get stretched periodically.

Wear your seat belt comfortably fastened below your belly. If you’re traveling to a different time zone, take jet lag (see box,
page 251
) into account. Rest up in advance, and plan on taking it easy for a few days once you arrive.

If you’re traveling by car.
Keep a bagful of nutritious snacks and a thermos of juice or milk handy for when hunger strikes. For long trips, be sure the seat you will occupy is comfortable; if it isn’t, consider buying or borrowing a special cushion for back support, available in auto supply or speciality stores or online. A pillow for neck support may also add to your comfort. For car safety tips, see
page 250
.

If you’re traveling by train.
Check to be sure there’s a dining car with a full menu. If not, bring adequate meals and snacks along. If you’re traveling overnight, book a sleeper car, if you can. You don’t want to start your trip exhausted.

Sex and the Pregnant Woman

Religious and medical miracles aside, every pregnancy starts with sex. So why does what probably got you here in the first place become so complicated now that you’re here?

Whether you’re having it more often or you’re having it less often, whether you’re enjoying it more or enjoying it less—or whether you’re not doing it or enjoying it at all—chances are that making a baby has changed the way you make love. From sorting out what is and isn’t safe in bed (or on the living room rug or on the kitchen counter) to figuring out which positions best accommodate your ever-bigger belly; from mismatched moods (you’re turned on, he’s turned off; he’s turned on, you’re turned off) to hormones gone wild (leaving your breasts more enticing than ever, yet too tender to touch), pregnancy sex is full of challenges on both sides of the bed. But not to worry. A little creativity, a good sense of humor, plenty of patience (and practice), and lots of love will conquer all when it comes to pregnancy lovemaking.

Down-up-down. While that might sound like a new sex position, it’s actually a good description of the roller-coaster pattern most couples can expect their sex lives to follow during their nine months of pregnancy. In the first trimester, many women find that their libidos take a nosedive, plummeting promptly as soon as pregnancy hormones kick in. And that slowdown in sexual interest should come as no shocker. After all, fatigue, nausea, vomiting, and painfully tender nipples don’t make great sex partners. But as with all things pregnancy, no two women are alike, which means no two libidos are alike, either. If you’re lucky, you might actually find that the first trimester makes you hotter than ever, thanks to the happy side of hormonal changes. genitals that are ultrasensitive and ever-tingly, and breasts that are extra big and extra fun to touch (or have touched).

Interest often—though not always—picks up during the second trimester, when early pregnancy symptoms have subsided and there’s more energy to put into lovemaking (and when less time in the bathroom leaves more time in the bedroom). Never had multiple orgasms before (or any orgasms)? This may be your lucky break—and your chance to get lucky again and again. That’s because extra blood flow to the labia, clitoris, and vagina can make it easier to climax than ever before—and to have orgasms that are stronger and longer lasting, too. But again, nothing’s a given during pregnancy. Some women actually lose that loving feeling in the second trimester—or never end up finding it at all during their nine months, and that’s normal, too.

As delivery nears, libido usually wanes again, sometimes even more drastically than in the first trimester, for obvious reasons. First, your watermelon-size abdomen makes the target more difficult for your partner to reach, even with creative positioning. second, the aches and discomforts of advancing pregnancy can cool even the hottest passion; and third, late in the trimester it’s hard to concentrate on anything but that eagerly and anxiously awaited event. Still, some couples manage to overcome those late-pregnancy obstacles and keep up the action until that first contraction.

With all the many physical changes you’re undergoing during your nine months of pregnancy, it’s no wonder desire and sexual pleasure are being affected, both positively and negatively. You’ll have to learn to accommodate some of the negative effects so their interference in your sex life is minimal.

Nausea and vomiting.
Morning sickness can certainly come between you and a good time. After all, it’s hard to purr with pleasure when you’re busy gagging up dinner. So use your time wisely. If your morning sickness rises with the sun, put after-dark hours to good use. If your evenings are queasy, hop on the morning love train. If morning sickness stays with you day and night, you and your spouse may just have to wait out its symptoms, which typically taper off by the end of the first trimester. Whatever you do, don’t pressure yourself to feel sexy when you’re feeling lousy; the result won’t be satisfying for anyone.

Fatigue.
It’s hard to get busy when you barely have the energy to get undressed. Happily, the worst of pregnancy fatigue should pass by the fourth month (though exhaustion will probably return in the last trimester). Until then, make love while the sun shines (when the opportunity presents itself) instead of trying to force yourself to stay up for after-dinner romance. Cap off a weekend afternoon of lovemaking with a nap or the other way around. Have the kind of breakfast in bed that doesn’t leave crumbs.

Your changing shape.
Making love can be both awkward and uncomfortable when your bulging belly seems to loom as large and forbidding as a Himalayan mountain. As pregnancy progresses, the gymnastics required to scale that growing abdomen may not seem, to some couples, worth the effort. (But there are ways to manage that mountain; read on for more.) What’s more, your fuller-than-ever figure may make you feel less sexy (though some women—and most partners—find that pregnant shape the most sensual of all female forms). If your body is a turnoff to you, try dressing it up in lacy lingerie or lighting your love nest with the flattering glow of candles. Also try to shed those negative body images by thinking: Big (in pregnancy) is beautiful.

Your engorged genitals.
Increased blood flow to the pelvic area, caused by hormonal changes of pregnancy, can make some women more sexually responsive than ever. But it can also make sex less satisfying (especially later in pregnancy) if a residual fullness persists after orgasm, leaving you feeling as though you didn’t quite make it. For your partner, too, the engorgement of your genitalia may increase pleasure (if he feels pleasantly and snugly caressed) or decrease it (if the fit is so tight he loses his erection).

Leakage of colostrum.
Late in pregnancy, some women begin producing the pre
milk called colostrum, which can leak from the breasts during sexual stimulation and can be a little disconcerting (and messy) in the middle of foreplay. It’s nothing to worry about, of course, but if it bothers you or your partner, concentrate on other parts of the body (like that possibly trigger-happy clitoris of yours!).

The Ins and Outs of Sex During Pregnancy

Wondering what’s safe and what’s not when it comes to making love during pregnancy? Here’s the lowdown:

Oral sex.
Cunnilingus (oral stimulation of the female genitals) is as safe as it is potentially pleasurable throughout pregnancy, so don’t hesitate to go for it (just make sure your partner doesn’t forcefully blow air into your vagina). Fellatio (oral stimulation of the penis) is always safe during pregnancy (as is swallowing semen), and for some couples is a very satisfactory substitute when intercourse isn’t permitted. It’s wise to avoid oral sex if your partner has an STD.

Anal sex.
Anal sex is probably safe during pregnancy, but proceed to the back door with caution. First, it probably won’t be comfortable if you have hemorrhoids, an occupational hazard of pregnancy—and it can make them bleed (which can really spoil the moment). Second, you’ll need to remember the same safety rule of anal sex whether you’re pregnant or not, but be especially fastidious about following it now: Never go from anal to vaginal sex without cleaning up first. Doing so may introduce harmful bacteria into your vaginal canal, setting you up for infection and risk to the baby.