When I Look to the Sky (16 page)

She pulled the dog-eared, tattered paperback from her bag.
“I’ve read it a hundred times.” She felt the lump in her throat grow bigger. “I miss her. This book and Papa help me keep her close. I was almost five when she passed away. My dad died when I was fifteen, and I’ve been with Papa ever since. He’s the best gift Mama ever gave me,” she smiled as she said it. “And for my sixteenth birthday he gave me the best gift ever,” she said.

“
What was that?” Matthew asked.

“
A place to belong; and his name…” she said and smiled. “He adopted me. My very first memory of him was how handsome he was. He would read to me, sing to me,” she said, closing her eyes; remembering. “And I just fell in love with him…” She was quiet a moment, reflecting. “I was very blessed that my dad kept him in my life.”

“
He loves you, I can tell.”

“
Oh, and I love him…”

The driver pulled the car over and opened the slide window.
“Galleries Lafayette, miss.” He handed her a card, “call when you are ready. I will meet you right back here.”

They shopped, had lunch and were back to the limo by
five.

Andy dressed and waited while Matthew used his room. Carlee wasted no time getting ready. She was wearing a long blue dress and sandals with several gold necklaces and large gold hoop earrings. Several bangle bracelets adorned her wrists and she’d pulled her hair up on top of her head. She looked bohemian and beautiful Andy thought as she dropped on the sofa beside him and snuggled into his arm.

“
Thanks for a great day, Papa,” she said as they waited.

Andy opened a bottle of champagne.
 He knew Carlee would want a taste so he chilled a bottle. He’d gone out for a walk earlier. The concierge directed him to a wine shop in walking distance. It was a beautiful day, and he enjoyed the quiet, being out, stretching his legs.

As Matthew exited the room,
Carlee looked up and he caught her eye. “Nice. You clean up good,” she laughed.

“
Wow,” he said. “You clean up pretty good yourself.” But all he could think about was how beautiful she was.

“
Like some champagne, Matt?”

“
I would, thank you.”

They
relaxed a while, talking. When it was time to go to the waiting limo, the remaining champagne went along. As they rode Andy gathered information, through conversation; he was fact-finding. With Roddy’s help he’d already done some checking.

“
So, you graduated from Savannah School of Arts or transferred here to finish your degree?” he asked.

“
I graduated. My degree is in fine arts. I came here on scholarship to further my education a year and a half ago. I think I’d like to work in photojournalism, maybe teach. I’m not really sure just now.”

“Your family?”

“
Dad’s grandfather was from New York, in the film industry. Movies were filmed in Jacksonville back in the day, and he liked it so much he moved his family there. Later, when filming moved to California, he worked to help bring theatre to Jacksonville. My dad’s father took over, and eventually my dad continued in the business after his father passed away. In recent years he’s worked to bring performers to the area, mostly small stage, musicals and music acts. Recently he’s been involved in bringing the film industry back to the area. When he retired, my oldest brother, Thomas stepped in. He helps get contacts to bring entertainment there now. I like photography more, stills more than the motion picture arts,” he continued.

“
My mom’s family came to the area from Virginia, very involved in the paper industry. She loves all art; she paints and draws, and I guess that led to my interest. My appreciation of the arts is because she made me aware of them. If you know anything about Jacksonville, Duval County, you will know of my mom,” he laughed. “Genevieve Hall Davis is a busy woman!”

“
My brother, Brian owns a Taco Tico franchise. Both brothers are older and married. Brian is four years older, and Thomas is ten. Brian married his wife Melia last year. Thomas and his wife Angela have two little girls; Percephanie is six, Megan is three. Percephanie,” he laughed. “What kind of name is that? I call them Percy and Megs, and they call me, Uncle Matthew,” he laughed.

C
arlee listened intently - hanging on Matthew’s every word.

Andy liked him. He was polite, educated
, and didn’t appear interested in Carlee’s financial status, which Andy was sure he’d figured out by now.

The evening was enjoyable. Carlee loved the Moulin Rouge, and chattered on and on about it as they returned to The Aristocrat. It was unlike anything she’d ever seen before. When they arrived back at the hotel, she went to her room to clean up before bed, leaving Andy and Matthew alone.

“
She’s precious to me,” Andy said over another glass of wine.

“
I know sir, she explained, somewhat. I think she’d be precious to anyone,” he replied, and smiled.

Andy started to correct him with a
‘stop calling me sir’, but realized that it was his upbringing; good, southern etiquette.

“
She’s going off to school in August.”

“
She told me; she seems very excited. Flagler is a beautiful school. It seems she wants to follow in her mama’s footsteps with the Cancer Foundation.”

“
To some extent,” Andy replied, proudly. “She’s very well versed in losing a parent at a young age. Her studies will be along those lines. The camp she will be going back to before school is something her mother started.”

“
In the short time since I met her she seems very real, genuine, very level-headed, given the circumstances,” he added. “I like her sir. Andy,” he corrected his self.

“
And she likes you young man.” As the door popped open Andy added, “So do I.”

Carlee emerged in pajama shorts and a
Traveler t-shirt, and sat down beside Andy. Matthew liked seeing the relationship they shared, but realized that she’d sat there so she could look at him without Andy noticing, and he smiled.

“
So do you what, Papa?” she asked.

“
Like this wine,” he smiled.

“
I booked a breakfast cruise on the Seine in the morning. Well young people, this old man is beat. I’m going to call it a night. Carlee, get packed, and help make the sofa for Matt. I called and there’s extra bedding in that closet.”

Carlee kissed
Andy’s cheek and Matthew followed her to her room. They talked as Carlee gathered her things into neat piles to stuff in her bags. Matthew watched her as she organized, and smiled. He saw the book in the pile she was sorting for her bag, on the bed.

“
I’d like to read that book,” he told her.

“
You’ll have to get your own,” she said and sat on the edge of the bed. “This one never leaves me.”

As she picked it up,
Matthew noticed her fingers lightly caress the worn copy. The curled, tattered and worn pages showed a lot of wear and tear –
love,
he thought. He wondered what it would be like to have to learn about a parent by reading about them. He was sure there were memories shared, but to learn the in-depth part of a life that was gone by reading about it in a book made him hurt thinking about it.

They talked a while longer, and b
efore he made his way to the sofa, Matthew hugged Carlee. As he held her, he snuck a kiss. “I’ve enjoyed this, all of it.” He hugged a little tighter, drinking in the smell of her, loving the feel of her. He kissed her again and felt her suck in a breath. “Good night, Carlee.”

H
e thought about her as he stretched out on the sofa, thinking about how he would see her again, and when.

The next morning, they shared more conversation and a lovely cruise along the Seine. Later, at the station Matthew thanked Andy, shaking his hand. “I had a great time.”

“
It was a pleasure,” Andy replied. “Take a moment, Carlee.” He walked toward the terminal to Brussels, looking back at the exchange taking place behind him.

“
Your phone will ring,” Matthew whispered in her ear as he hugged her, kissing her cheek.

“
I hope so,” she turned quickly in his arms, kissing him.

“
Carlee,” he said.

“
So you don’t forget me,” she laughed.

“
No chance,” he said and hugged her tighter.

~ ~ ~

Matthew boarded the train for London with thoughts of the previous week. He liked Carlee, enjoyed her. He liked Andy, liked that he could share conversation with them both. He wasn’t working that evening, and when he arrived, he went to a bookstore, one of his local hangouts. He ordered a coffee and browsed.

“
Hey, Essie,” he said.

“
Help you find something, Matthew?” the gal behind the counter asked.

“
Older book,” he replied. “Paperback or used is fine. The title is
Rock and Roll Never Forgets
.”

“
Not familiar,” she replied as she got on the computer to search. “I have one,” she said. She walked from behind the counter leading the way. She pulled the copy from the shelf, and looked back at Matthew. It didn’t seem the kind of book he usually looked for, most were on photography.

“
Special project,” he said knowing her thoughts, knowing it
was
special to him.

He went home, grabbed a beer and stretched out in his recliner. He flipped through the pages glancing at pictures first, and then began to read. He wanted to know. Class was late the next day, and he wasn’t working, so he read, and read. The last time he looked, the clock read 3:06am.

When he woke the next morning
, he was still in the recliner with the book on his chest. He got a bite to eat and thought about Carlee. He read about that ‘rollercoaster’ she referred to, and thought about her growing up without her mama. He thought about the love-affair that Andy and Bethy shared, and how her dad must have felt. ‘Lost’, was the word that came to mind, and he wondered how Carlee didn’t end up lost, as well, but then… he saw how much Andy loved her, and she turned out OK in spite of her losses.

He’d seen a beat up piece of paper on the bed in Paris as she sorted her things when she was packing her bags. “Emerson,” he said picking the piece of paper up.

“Mmm hmm, it’s something that gives me peace,” she told him as he picked it up to read it. “
For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.”

He thought about how profound that statement really was, now that he understood more.

He looked at the clock; it was too early to call his mom, so he sent an email.

At 1:10 his phone rang. “Hey, Mom. Thanks for giving me a call.”

“
What’s up? You said nothing’s wrong but it feels like you have something on your mind. I’ve got fresh coffee and I’m sitting on the back porch watching the herons down by the river, so shoot!”

Since he’d met Carlee, h
e’d told his mom about her in previous conversations, so Geni Davis knew he liked her. She realized as he talked that she didn’t really know
how much
. Matthew told her about the book, and Geni felt tears in her eyes, partly over Beth’s story, but the thought of a young girl growing up without her mother broke her heart.

“
Reading the book gave me a better understanding of Carlee, but it made me sad. I can’t even begin to imagine growing up without you and Dad.”

Geni listened intently, and then finally said,
“Matthew you really seem to like this young woman.”

“
Like? Nah,” he replied and paused for effect. Geni waited, because she knew there was more. “I’ve fallen way past ‘like’, Mom. She’s different, special and I can hardly wait to see her again. I can’t wait for you to meet her.”

See her
… meet her,
Geni thought as she listened. She hung up thinking, ‘My baby boy is in love.’

Matthew went to bed that evening thinking of Carlee. He’d dated plenty of girls. He liked some of them a lot, but he had never been with anyone that he couldn’t stop thinking about. She was quirky, fun, passionate… and beautiful. He loved their conversations; he pretty much loved everything about her; she was adorable. He was ready to explore a relationship with her, explore the passion; but it wasn’t sexual passion, although he thought of that too. Her true passion was for life, and now he understood why.

CHAPTER NINE
~ The Hills are Alive

It was late afternoon when they
arrived in Brussels. Carlee and Andy quickly settled into their hotel, and ran out to find a place to grab a bite to eat. Later, they took a leisurely stroll, and took in the sights by the light of evening.

The next day of touring
included chocolate - a lot of chocolate, and Carlee was in her glory. A tour of the Grand Palace and dinner of local seafood at a little bistro close by, along with some beer and wine tasting ended their visit.

The following morning brought an early train ride to Frankfurt
, and that evening, Carlee’s first opera, La Boheme
.
Andy watched her as tears rolled down her cheeks. Afterward, they dined and talked about the performance.

“
Oh, my goodness,” she told him as she thought about Mimi and Rudolfo and cried again. “It’s such a sad story. It reminded me of you and Mama. That’s why I cried, it was so sad...”

Andy thought a moment, and then became more aware of the comparison that Carlee shared.
“Wow, Carlee, I didn’t see that as I watched. I was more engrossed in the music than the story.” He reflected, and added, “But, I see it now.”

Wiping her eyes, she told him,
“If this is how worked up I am over this story, I can’t imagine seeing Mama’s book as a movie. I just can’t even imagine what that would feel like.”

“
You’ll know when it’s right, if it ever is, and if it’s never right… that’s OK too.”

From Frankfurt they made their way to Zurich. Andy found a music festival called ‘Summer Nights,’ taking place there as they planned their trip. It was a series of evening concerts in the park. The evening they arrived was ‘The Blues.’ Carlee inquired at the hotel, and the kitchen prepared a dinner picnic of fresh bread, meats and cheeses. It was all packed and ready for them to pick up on their way out, along with a lawn blanket. Andy brought along a chilled a bottle of the Machus, and they ate, drank wine and enjoyed the music.

The concert included v
arious performers, most of them local, and they shared an evening filled with music. One of the performers was David Steele, a blues artist from the U.S. He performed a number of songs and then stood at the microphone to talk to the crowd.

“Thank you! What a great evening! If you’ll indulge me a moment, I’ve just been made aware that we have a special guest in the crowd. Ladies and gentleman please help me convince Mr. Andy Stevens to join me!” he shouted.

The crowd glanced around; spotting him
, they began to cheer. “Go Papa!” Carlee laughed, as he reluctantly, he made his way to the stage.

“
Good evening!” he yelled, acknowledging the crowd.

David talked to his accompanist a moment, and then handed
his guitar and to Andy. “Guest choice,” he laughed as someone brought a stool.

Andy sat with the guitar, tweaking and tuning first, and then started playing.
“I hope you like this, it’s one of my favorites,” he said. David picked up right away on the tune and joined in on piano for the bluesy Stevie Ray Vaughn song, “Pride and Joy”.

Well I love my baby, like the finest wine

Stick with her until the end of time

She’s my sweet little thing,

S
he’s my pride and joy

She
’s my sweet little baby,

I
’m her little lover boy…

Carlee was on her feet singing and dancing along with the crowd around her. She called Matthew’s phone, knowing it would go to voicemail, she held it out to record some of the concert. She took lots of pictures, sending them to Nathan, Kimmy, and Matthew. When Andy finished, David left no gap in time, and immediately started playing Andy’s hit, “Won’t You”.

Won’t You

Take my hand

Give me your heart

Bare your soul

Hold me

Be there

Make me whole

Love me

Be my forever, won’t you…

Andy stayed on stage a while, singing. “I’ve got something I’ve been playing with, let me know what you think of this one,” he said to the crowd. He began playing something not even Carlee had ever heard. She knew music and lyrics were always going through his head. Sometimes he would scribble on napkins, sometimes he’d call his voicemail and hum, or sing a few lines, but his ‘music brain’, as Carlee called it, was never off.

Never give up

We can make it through

Never give in

I believe in me and you

Never let go

We
’ve weathered this before

Never give up

I couldn’t love you any more

Never give in

We’re worth a fight

Never let go

We’ve gotta make it right…

They ended Andy’s time with Traveler’s hit, “Timeless.” Carlee had seen him perform many times, and she loved it – but this was special and she cherished these moments. She could tell he enjoyed himself. When he returned to their blanket, people were thanking him, some wanting autographs, but most respected his time and privacy enough to just glance, and watch.

“
Papa! What a nice surprise!” Carlee said leaning over to hug him. “I love that song! It sounds like a couple trying to work through a problem because they are so in love.”

“
It was,” he smiled. “It’s been stewing in there for a while.”

Later, he thought about the song he’d shared that evening, and he was glad to finally let it go. He
had
been keeping that one in. He thought about the opera and Carlee’s thoughts. And then he thought about her going off to camp, and then school, and for the first time in a long time, he felt lonely.

~ ~ ~

The
ir next stop was Italy. They flew to Marco Polo Airport in Venice the next morning. As they planned their European journey, Carlee expressed a desire to spend more time in Italy, Andy agreed. They would be there thirteen days. Andy rented a convertible for their travels, and booked a suite over-looking the Grand Canal in Venice for the first three nights. The first evening they explored what was close by.

T
hey crammed in walking tours, local cuisine, and crossed the Ponte Della Liberta to explore, and roam the Veneto Hills. As they hiked, they talked of the past and the future. Andy knew that he would miss that most, their talks. Usually, Carlee talked and he listened, but he knew he would miss that time with her.

They ate at a
traditional trattoria, tasted wine, and enjoyed perfect weather. Their time in Venice ended with a gondola ride on the Grand Canal, and gelato at a sidewalk café.

Matthew called
Carlee each evening and they talked for hours. Carlee checked in with her family often, telling them all about their travels, and sending pictures. She and Jenna spoke every few days, and Andy heard her gush as she told Jenna all about Matthew.

Departing Venice, they drove to Bologna, about an hour and a half away, and talked about all they had seen and done. It was another gorgeous day, “definitely the top down” kind of drive that Carlee requested. Known for some of the best food in the world, Bologna was about eating. They dined at a quaint old place that reminded Carlee of a grandmother’s dining room. The owners recognized Andy, and came by to say hello, offering them a taste of all of their specialties. They sampled pasta every way they prepared it. “I think my belly is gonna explode!” Carlee laughed when they left.

But she had room for Gelato
, later. And Andy laughed, thinking about her always ‘starving!’ but eating just a little of everything.

The next day, they traveled south to San Marino to tour the Palazzo Pubblico and the Bascillica, and then continued south for a meal that included Cioppino, a local Italian seafood stew. Later, as they checked into their hotel for the evening Carlee sighed, “Papa, you are spoiling me with all these fancy hotels. I’m going to be going back to camp and then school, both of which include twin beds!”

Placing a tender hand on her cheek he told her,
“I have to spoil you while I can.” Nestled into the hills over-looking San Marino, the hotel’s views were breathtaking.

The next morning
, they made their way to Teramo. Marco’s family was from the region and had a villa there that they loaned them for the week. They made it a leisurely drive, stopping to enjoy the scenery along the way. Carlee loved sharing this time with Andy. They stopped at a little market Marco told them about to get groceries and supplies. When they reached the villa and settled in, both collapsed, and rested, preparing for days of roaming and exploring the area.

They spent
the days hiking and roaming, seeing the incredible views within the Gran Sasso and Monti della Laga National Park. They visited wineries, choosing some to ship home and some to leave at the villa as a ‘Thank You’ gift. They toured, ate and drank wine until they would both fall into bed at night, exhausted. 

Matthew
’s nightly calls continued, and Carlee would sit with Andy in the common room of the villa, sharing details of their travels. She asked him about school and his days. Andy could see it blossoming. She was happy.

On the morning of Friday July 13th, Carlee rose and made french toast for their breakfast, while Andy made mimosas. When they joined at the table, the two of them toasted, talked and remembered, on what would have been Beth’s sixtieth birthday.

They
were leaving the villa sometime the next day. They had a basic plan, but their trip had pretty much been what Carlee called, ‘flying by the seat of our pants,’ and Andy loved it.

“
What’s next on your agenda, my dear,” he asked while they were sharing a dinner of fresh bread, local Italian meats, cheeses and fresh tomatoes that they’d gotten from an outside market in their travels that day. Carlee went to get her iPad
.

Of course she had a plan,
Andy thought and smiled.

She turned the screen toward him and scooted her chair around the table beside him, so they could both see.
“It looks like Rome is about four and a half hours away,” she said. “Not being in a hurry,” she added, “because I
do not
want to hurry!”

“
Whatever you’d like,” he replied.

“
What I would
like
,” she laughed, “is to continue south and come up the other coast, but we are getting close to our four weeks and there is still so much!”

They were nearing the end of their third week
, with a tentative plan to return to the U.S. July 18
th
. As far as Andy was concerned their plans were open. Their travel and return home could be whatever Carlee wanted it to be. He was enjoying this time with her.

“
Do you want to extend it?” he asked her.

She looked at him, thoughtfully a moment
, then asked; “Really?”

“
Whatever you’d like, I’m enjoying it,” he said and added, “a lot.”

“
Shall we go to Barcelona?” she asked.

“
We can fly from Rome,” he said, not missing a beat. “I’d like to go to Bordeaux too. And of course we will fly home from London.”

“
London?” her face lit up.

“
Yes, it’s an easier flight home from Heathrow,” he smiled.

“
Papa! You’re the best!”

“
I know,” he laughed easily. “Let’s make our plans…”

After a tour of Rome, they would take a flight to Barcelona for a few days. Andy got on the phone and made reservations while Carlee called Matthew.

“
Hello there!” she said when he answered and he thought of Longfellow;
“Oh, there is something in that voice that reaches the innermost recesses of my spirit”

“
Having fun?” he asked.

“
Yes! Actually, we are having such a wonderful time that we’re extending our stay! It’s so beautiful here, and we’ve spent so much time enjoying our drive through Italy that we decided to stay a little longer. We’re driving to Rome tomorrow for a few days. Then we’ll fly to Barcelona and drive through the southern part of France to Bordeaux. Papa is making our return flight from London.”

“
I hope I’ll get to see you when you come through here,” he said, anxiously.

“
I reckon that’s why we are coming through London,” she laughed.

Matthew only knew he couldn
’t wait to see her again.