When I Look to the Sky (41 page)

“Get the two of them talking and we’re doomed, you know,” Matthew laughed.

“I kinda like it,” Andy said and turned back to the TV.

As the cake baked, Carlee pulled out the recipe she wanted to make for dinner
, and they got busy getting it all together, talking the whole time.

Andy looked again, loving what he was observing, and once again Matthew watched Andy.

“You’re quiet today,” Matthew said.

“Too much good stuff going on in there,” Andy laughed. “I don’t want to miss anything!”

Matthew laughed too, but he wasn’t so sure that was the whole story.

Final
ly at a stopping point, the two women joined Matthew and Andy in the living room. Carlee plopped on the sofa beside Andy. “Papa, I’m so glad you two are here!”

“
Me too,” he pulled her close.

Later, Matthew said, “Let’s open a bottle of the wine we brought from Tuscany. After dinner we’ll show you the pictures from our trip.”

A while later,
Carlee and Geni retreated to the kitchen to finish the meal. Carlee meticulously sliced the two layers of cake in half. Placing one on a plate, she spread some of the apple butter mixture over it and repeated until all four layers were on the plate, and she poured the rest of the apple mixture over it and set it in the oven to warm.

“Save room for dessert,” Carlee said as she served the meal. Once they pushed their plates aside, Carlee looked at Andy. “Ready for your surprise, Papa?”

“I can hardly stand the suspense,” he laughed.

She brought the cake out with one long taper candle stick
stuck in the middle, and they all sang “Happy Birthday.”

“Carlee, the apple
butter cake,” he said. His voice cracked with emotion.

“Nanny told me how to make it a while back
, and when we were going through the grocery store, I decided to surprise you!”

He rose from his seat and went to kiss her cheek. “It’s a lovely surprise. Thank you.”

They finished the evening with a slide show on the TV of pictures from their Tuscany trip.

“We should head back
, or we’ll still be here for breakfast,” Andy said, finally.

“When are you going home?” Carlee asked.

“After you see the doctor,” Andy replied and Carlee saw Geni nod.

After they were on their way, Geni said, “Thank you Andy, I enjoyed that so much.”

“Carlee did too
; I could tell,” he told her.

When they reached the room, Geni went to Andy. “Good night,” she said and hugged him. He didn’t attempt a kiss this time.

Andy went to his room and crawled into bed, thinking… remembering… A little while later his phone rang. He looked; and smiled. “We have to stop meeting like this,” he laughed.

“It’s easier this way, for now,” Geni said. “Thank you again for a beautiful day. I love sharing this with you. Thank you,” she said once more.

“Good night, Geni.”

“I need a couple of your coins,” Carlee said after they left.

“
What do you need?” he laughed, wondering what she was thinking.

“I need a one
-cent and a fifty-cent,” she said.

Matthew reached in his pocket, and pulled out what he had. “I’ve got a five and a twenty; will that work?”

She took the coins and laid the five on the table. “That’s more than a penny for your thoughts. What on earth were you thinking all day? I could see your brain was another place half the time.”

“Did they seem kinda weird to you?”
he asked.

“I didn’t think so,” she said, scrunching her nose in thought.

“Maybe it’s just me; they just seemed funny, I don’t know.” He pulled her into his arms; “What’s the twenty for?”

“Come with me,” she pulled her shirt over her head and dropped it
to the floor. She continued, leaving a trail of clothes to the bedroom. “I want to know what’s on your mind, now…”

The next morning Carlee called the doctor’s office. They had an appointment available at ten, and she scheduled it.

“I want to go with you,” Matthew said.

“You have to work. Someone has to pay the bills!” she laughed, but she wished he could go too.

After he left, Andy called. “Good morning, love.”

“My appointment is at ten,” she laughed, knowing immediately what was coming next.

“I’m coming to go with you. Geni wants to do some shopping. I’ll be there at 9:30,” he told her.

Andy called her as the driver pulled up. She got in the car, and he kissed her cheek. “Feeling OK?”

“Yep, let’s
do this thing!” she laughed.

They called her back to see the doctor. She talked over her medical history with him, and he gave her a physical exam. She told the doctor that it had started at camp in August, explained the low blood sugar and the fainting to him. And then explained about the flight home and the few times the nausea had come on since.

“All involved movement,” he said, “bending over with the shovel,
flight, getting up too quickly…”

She listened
; he appeared to be talking to himself as he examined her.

“Bloo
d pressure is good; I didn’t really see any high or low blood sugar as I tested you like we saw when you came in before.” He looked over her medications, “I find nothing here. Your ears look good. No headaches…”

Just tell me what in the hell is going on
! She wanted to scream the words at him. She knew Andy was probably chomping at the bits, waiting.

“I
suspect it’s just a slight case of vertigo. I’m going to prescribe a transdermal scopolamine patch and a low dose of diazepam; it’s an anxiety medication. We’ll see if that helps. I have a patch here; we’ll put it on and see how it goes. I’ll see you back in six weeks.”

She had been in with the doctor for a while, and Andy was getting antsy. When the door opened, he felt a wave of relief. The doctor came to him to introduce himself.

“
It’s a pleasure to meet you, Mr. Stevens. We’re treating her for vertigo. I don’t believe it’s anything to worry about,” the doctor said.

“But,” Andy said, “
it just comes out of nowhere?”

“Could be several things
; we’re approaching it this way first, and I’ll see her in a few weeks, sooner if she feels like something needs attention.”

In the car, Andy tried not to be anxious. He waited for Carlee to explain what happened had behind closed doors.

She looked at her watch and knew that Matthew would be between classes.
She took out her phone and as she dialed told Andy, “Papa, I’m going to call Matthew. That way I’m only telling the story once. Hey there,” she said when he answered. “I’m putting you on speaker so Papa can hear too.”

“Carlee, wait,” Matthew said, “let me conference Mom in; she’s already sent me two te
xt messages. He was gone a moment, and finally they were all on the phone.

Carlee
explained everything the doctor told her. “My blood pressure and sugar are fine. He didn’t find anything with my ears; he asked about headaches and I told him I had none to speak of. He told Papa and me both that it’s just a slight case of vertigo. He slapped some kind of patch behind my ear and gave me a prescription for a low dose of an anxiety medication. I go back in six weeks.”

That evening they shared pizza and Andy asked Carlee about school, still watching her like a hawk.

“I think I have my classes narrowed down, not finalized
. Still looking at times, and all that, I wanna be able to ride back and forth with Matthew.”

“S
how them the picture, Matthew!”

“What picture?” Geni asked.

“The one that’s going to make us famous,” Carlee laughed.

He opened his briefcase and pulled
out the picture and handed it to Andy. Geni went to sit beside him to look. “I took it when we were in Tuscany and submitted it for a contest. I didn’t win, but the picture made it to Diego Aceveda, and he wants to use it for a new perfume he’s debuting in a few months.

“Wonderful!” Geni exclaimed. “Carlee, people will know you everywhere!”

“They’ll know us!” Carlee laughed. “At first I was hesitant, but the more I think about it… the more excited I am!”

Geni sat quiet a moment
, thinking about the initial hesitation and realized why – she didn’t want to be in the spotlight. She didn’t want to live the life Beth had lived.

Andy
thought about Beth. She would never have felt comfortable doing something like that. He thought about the PSAs for Suntone and felt proud of Carlee’s choices. Her whole life it seemed, she just kinda rolled with whatever was going on.

“It’s a beautiful picture,” Geni said.

“Beautiful person to photograph,” Matthew smiled, hugging Carlee.

Feeling comfortable that Carlee was OK, and under a doctor’s care, Andy and Geni were leaving the next morning. As they got ready to return to the hotel, Geni went to Carlee. “This was lovely, and I enjoyed it so much.”

“It was an awesome surprise!
I’ve loved being in the kitchen with you, learning from you.” She hugged her and turned to Andy.

“Papa, this is one of the best surprises ever. Call when you hit the ground. I love you.”

“I love you, right back. Thank you for making my birthday so special,” he said hugging her.

Geni was hugging Matthew, and then Andy went to him.

“Thank you for helping me make this happen. I don’t think I could have waited until Christmas,” Andy said as Matthew hugged him.

“I enjoyed every minute of all of that!” Geni declared once they were in the car.

“
Me too,” Andy said, glancing her way.

She looked at him, and smiled.

“Night cap?” he asked when they were back in the suite.

“Sounds nice,” she replied.

Andy poured them a glass of wine. Geni took a seat on the sofa and got comfortable. He sat in the chair across the room, watching her.

Finally, taking a sip of the wine, she looked up at him. “Well?”

“Well, what?” he asked.

“Are we ever gonna talk about that kiss?”

“Do you want another one?” he asked and they both laughed. “I wanted to talk about it the other night, but I got the impression the conversation was over when you said ‘good night’,” he said.

“I wasn’t sure where my head was at the time,” she replied.

“And now you know?” he asked. 

“Confused, but curious,” she told him.

“I see,” he said and waited. “Confused because?”

“It’s only been a year since Tom for one thing. Longer for you
; at least that’s what I think. Confused about what Carlee and Matthew would think… my boys.”

“And? Curious because?” he asked, watching intently as he waited for her response.

“It’s been a year, longer for you, and what Carlee, Matthew and my boys would think…” repeating her earlier comment, she laughed.

Andy thought a minute before he said anything, then looked at her and began, “It has been a long time for me. I’m not gonna lie to you, I’ve gone on plenty of dates, but I never met anyone I wanted to make a second one with. Casual worked, all around,” he said, and she heard, and understood the innuendo. Losing Beth, not just once, but many times, made me wary. I loved her, Geni. I didn’t think I could ever love again after I messed that up. Maybe I was afraid I would mess up again. And then Carlee…” he smiled.

“A different kind of love
, I know, but I didn’t know if there was room in my heart for anyone else. She was, is,” he corrected. “She
is
everything to me. But she is off now, building a life with that wonderful young-man she picked up in a restaurant while traipsing across Europe with her papa.” He smiled remembering, that first night, and Geni laughed.

“And now there’s this empty feeling, and I’m not sure what to do about it.”

“I do,” Geni said.

“You do what?” he smiled.

“Want another kiss,” she said.

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

I’m not even sure where to begin…

What a journey this is for me. I wake up each morning and pinch myself. I feel blessed and grateful; any one whose fingers have touched this story is a gift to me. I am so thankful for my husband who allows me to come home from the J-O-B and go to my happy place - and understands the ‘places I go.’ I love when he gets teary-eyed as he reads something that he knows is a memory for me – my books are filled with my life. My family and friends read something and I get a call or a text that says, “I remember this,” or “That’s your mom.” I miss her, so if you knew her, you will find her in there too.

Thank you to my family for the memories I share, if it sounds familiar – it might be! Thank you for helping make so many of them.

Many thanks to my second family – the Johanneses – so many blessings you’ve shared. Tom, I loved feeling like a ‘Rock-Star’ at my ‘photo-shoot’, and as I type this - I still have NO CLUE which picture will end up in the book!  JenJ, I can’t wait to give you the FIRST copy out of the box! Thank you for helping me ‘see’ a better ending… Jan and Lynn – thank you for your encouragement. Thank you for being there with me on the path to where I am right now. I hope with each book, you see my growth. JMac, because I have so many Jennifers in my life now, I can’t wait to share the journey ahead with you – pushing and bossing me the whole way! My sister from another mister… my friend – thank you for believing in me!

Dawn, Thank you for checking to make sure my writing IS better, and helping me put it together to look good. And WOW on the ‘look good’… Jeff, I can’t stop looking at the gorgeous cover that helps other see the beautiful Carlee that I saw. You took an idea and made it ART. I can’t wait to see what ‘we’ come up with for
Feel Like Makin’ Love
.

I have a confession… I have plenty of notes for the third book; I know where it starts, most of the middle and the end, but honestly… I hesitate putting it all together because it means that ‘journey’ is over. I have other paths to travel, but this one – Andy’s journey – will come to an end. He has been in my heart for a long time and I will miss him. Don’t read anything into that – because YOU don’t know – only the voices in my head know and they aren’t telling!

Thank you to all of you who took a chance on a new writer… and want more. I love the messages you send me, and to Jennifer H. and the Three Chicks – thank you for helping advance my journey! I look forward to the future with you!

Lastly, I have to thank Scott Michael Underwood, Charles, Colin, James W Stafford, and Pat Monahan for allowing your beautiful song, “When I Look to the Sky: inspired the words in my story, to David Katz, Pat Monahan and Sam Hollander for the wedding song that Carlee found because she grew up loving Train, and to in Gaye, William Stevenson, Norman J. Whitehead and Stevie Ray Vaughn for giving me one of Andy’s favorite songs to share.

Music takes me amazing places…

Love,

Barbara