With or Without You (2 page)

He had long fingers with dark whorls of hair over the knuckles. They were hands of a man. Not the boy who had given her one night of teenage passion twenty years before, but hands she imagined drifting higher on her smooth thigh, slipping beneath her dress and seeking her heated folds.

Wetness dampened her panties. She squeezed her thighs together and shifted her knees.

Matt lifted questioning brown eyes and her breath caught in her throat, making swallowing difficult. She’d seen those same eyes often over the years. Matt had been starring in her nighttime fantasies since their magical encounter on that warm spring night.

“I’m sorry about all this. I thought it was a makeover show.” She clasped her hands in her lap. If only the couch could open up and swallow her whole. Mortification heated her cheeks. “I’m surprised too.”

She’d forgotten the lopsided smile that disarmed and could disrobe a girl in thirty seconds flat.

“Surprised is a good word. Tessa, it’s not an unpleasant surprise…just unexpected.”

He leaned back and settled more comfortably in the loveseat. His hip still rested against hers, sending alarming heat into her core. She hoped he couldn’t feel her temperature because she felt like a nuclear reactor with the red warning lights blazing and emitting dangerous levels of sexual radiation. Overexposure could lead to fried brain cells. Clearly hers had already been damaged. Had it been that damn long since a man had heated her to the point of meltdown from innocent skin contact? Well, okay, there was one memory, most likely distorted with age, supplying the fuel.

Damn, why did he have to look so good?

Dark hair, cut neat and clean around the ears, was left longer on top, enough so that the bit of natural curl tempted a woman’s fingers. Tessa clasped her hands in her lap before she reached up to comb a stray lock from his forehead with her fingertips.

Awkward silence stretched between them. Pressure built behind her eyes and her heart pounded hard and heavy. God, she felt like a fool. Her daughter had brought her one and only one-night stand to daytime talk.

“So where are you living these days?” Not that she needed to ask. He lived in Chicago. At least he had the last time she
Googled
his name.

“Chicago.”

More silence.

“Matt.” She adjusted her position so that she faced him directly. “This is awkward. Let’s just make the best of the situation. This has to be over soon. Exactly how many hours of footage do they need for a one-hour show?” She smoothed her dress, trying to inch it down her thighs. Had she known she’d be sitting with the one who had gotten away, she’d have chosen something more conservative.

The hot Hollywood starlet needed to go back to wardrobe. The sexy clothes were pickling her brain. Sexy clothes, sexy new look—however, she was too scared to play sexy kitten. She needed out of the situation. Rehashing the past would raise certain questions she wasn’t ready to answer…would never be ready to answer.

“Relax, Tessa.”

She hated the way he said her name. Okay, so she loved it. His voice was deep and smooth like fine brandy. She wanted to savor a sip. More than a sip, she wanted to get drunk. All of which posed a huge problem.

Mentally beating her libido into submission, she focused on the priority, getting through the show.

“We’re supposed to be getting reacquainted. I assume you aren’t married. At least, I hope the show wouldn’t try to set me up with a married woman.”

He smiled and her stomach swooped. Just as he had in high school, he turned her knees to jelly. Matt Toler had been her ideal for a boyfriend—too bad he’d always had another girl on his arm. Even if he hadn’t been the guy all the girls lusted after, they didn’t belong to the same cliques. Matt had been Mr. Popular and she’d just been…Tessa.

She laughed nervously. “I’m not married.”

“Divorced?”

She shook her head. “I never married.” She realized he might wonder about Brianna. Anyone could tell they were mother and daughter. But that’s not all they’d notice. Brianna was a perfect blend of her mother and her father. Tessa groaned.

“What’s wrong?”

Tessa snapped her eyes to his. “Oh nothing.” Just that she intended to keep as much distance between Brianna and Matt as possible. With her luck, Jade would notice the family resemblance and Tessa’s entire world would collapse around her.

As if she’d conjured the woman, Jade approached. Her smile widened. “Looks like our high school sweethearts are getting along.” She spoke into her microphone, at the same time keeping eye contact with the camera. “We have another surprise.”

Tessa didn’t think she could handle another surprise. All she’d wanted out of the show was a new haircut. If this day taught her anything it was to never procrastinate. If she’d taken the time to update her look, her daughter wouldn’t have had a reason to call the show. Lesson number two: never go on a talk show.

Matt stood and held a hand out to help Tessa. She slipped her hand into his. Warm strong fingers closed around hers. The heat moved up her arm. Tingles tightened her nipples beneath the silk of her dress. “Thank you,” she said, a bit breathless. High heels didn’t help the wobble in her knees.

Matt wrapped an arm around her waist and supported her against his side. He leaned in close, his breath tickling her ear, and whispered, “Let’s have some fun and make it good for the cameras.”

Make it good for the cameras, what’s that supposed to mean?
“Matt—” He stopped any further words by dragging her close. She caught sight of his devious grin a moment before he captured her lips. His mouth covered hers and her heart fluttered. Firm lips confidently moved against hers. This was nothing like she remembered.

This was better. A perfect kiss, lips to lips, tantalizing textures to tempt and to hint at the promise of passion given a more private setting. He didn’t try to part her lips, deepen the kiss, although she ached for a taste of his tongue.

Cheers of approval penetrated through the mind-numbing fog. Tessa slipped her hands between their bodies and pressed her palms to his chest. With a slight push she broke the kiss.

“Well now, that is the kind of hello we’d hoped to see.” Jade’s long red nails clicked against the microphone as she clapped. “I’m going to help the two of you get reacquainted. We have a limousine out front. After a tour of the city, you have reservations for dinner and dancing.”

“Wonderful.”

Not wonderful! In fact, terrible!

Matt’s hand rested on her lower back, making her incredibly aware of his nearness. Tessa knew her threshold for stimuli. Matt had already breached her safety parameter. He’d kissed and now touched her and it felt far too good to risk raising the intensity in a romantic atmosphere.

However, she could plan. Once in the limo, she’d casually claim a headache from the stress of the show. An hour from now she’d be safely ensconced back in her hotel room.

As a medical doctor, Matt recognized anxiety. Tessa’s pulse raced. The rhythmic pounding throbbed into his palm. Her skin was hot and her voice a bit breathless. Hell, he didn’t know what normal was for her, but this sure wasn’t what he expected. That didn’t mean he didn’t like the idea of her being a bit anxious. It wasn’t as if he represented the picture of calm. His heart thundered.

Over the years, she’d flashed through his thoughts now and again. Obviously he’d been in her thoughts. Why else would her daughter contact the show and ask for a reconnection? He couldn’t wait to get Tessa out of the camera’s eye so that he could hear her explanation. It ought to be interesting.

Matt remembered prom night, maybe not as vividly as Tessa did. They had fun, but he certainly wasn’t proud of his behavior that night.

They’d been at the same “after prom” party. Her date had passed out on the front lawn. All she’d wanted was to leave. He’d had a fight with Heather. Thinking back, he remembered how he’d felt walking in on his girlfriend lip-locked with another guy. They’d argued. She chose to stay at the party and he’d called it quits on their relationship. Yeah, he’d been pissed off…until Tessa had asked for a ride home.

For two months he’d sat behind her in advanced biology. The soft and sweet scent of her perfume had kept him keenly aware of
human
biology. He’d been lucky to get the B+ out of that class. Back then, Matt never thought he’d have a chance with Tessa. She’d never given any indication she was interested…until prom night.

They’d made a stop for burgers and shakes. That’s when she’d told him her parents were away for the weekend. He should’ve gone home. Instead they’d taken the food to her place. They’d talked and laughed for a couple of hours. He hadn’t planned to spend the night, but when they sat together on the couch to watch a movie, they’d eventually fallen asleep. He woke during the night with her body pressed against his. After a few caresses, their hot make-out session turned into every teenage boy’s fantasy. The way he remembered the night, they’d been wild for each other.

However, the next day, as much as he wanted to see Tessa again, Heather had come to his house to try to patch things up. They’d never gotten back together, but he also hadn’t pursued Tessa. At the time, he’d been focused on school. Then two months later he’d left for college and he never knew what had happened to her.

Not exactly a shining moment of his adolescence. Although a memory he wouldn’t change. Perhaps without that experience, he would’ve struggled with ending things with Heather and going away to school. As it went, he’d left home and hadn’t looked back.

Maybe he should have.

He glanced in her direction. He regretted that he didn’t take the opportunity to get to know her in high school. Maybe this was their second chance.

Jade said goodbye to her studio audience, waved to the camera and with a passing “Thanks” to Matt and Tessa, she exited the stage.

“Finally.” Tessa yanked on the microphone and tried to untangle the wire leading to the battery pack hidden in the back of her dress.

“Let me help you.” Matt ran his finger under the mic cord. His knuckle grazed the underside of her arm. He couldn’t help noticing her nipples respond. Hard points thrust against silk. His fingers stilled.

“I got it.” She gave a tug and the wire came free.

“Mom, this was so much fun.” Tessa’s daughter was the image of her mother in high school. Even as a teenage, lust-filled boy he’d realized Tessa was beautiful. Like her, Tessa’s daughter had high cheek bones, bright blue eyes with long thick lashes and honeyed skin, only the daughter’s nose was lightly dusted with freckles.

“Matt Toler.” He held his hand out to the young woman.

“Brianna Brooks.”

“Nice to meet you.”

Brianna turned to her mother. “Since you’ll be leaving in the limo with Mr. Toler—”

“Call me Matt.”

Tessa grew pale.

Matt cocked an eyebrow. “Are you okay?”

She nodded, but her eyes glistened. If he had to guess he’d say she was close to tears.

“Thank you, Matt,” Brianna said. “The show made arrangements to take me back to the hotel.” She turned to her mom. “So I’ll see you tonight.”

“Wait.” Tessa grabbed onto her daughter’s arm. “You know, this hardly seems fair. We were going to see the city. I mean—” she glanced at Matt then turned back to Brianna, “—this is sort of out of the blue. I’m sure Matt hadn’t planned to spend the entire day with me.” She released a nervous laugh. “He didn’t expect
me
at all.”

Maybe not, but he liked the idea of spending the day with her. Perhaps she was uncomfortable being alone with him. It had been twenty years. Reality was they didn’t know each other anymore. “Would you like Brianna to join us?”

“No! Um…Matt, it’s great to see you again. I think I’d better go with Brianna.”

“Absolutely not.” Brianna gave her mom a quick kiss. “I’ll be fine.” She winked at Matt. “Have a good time. No curfew.” With a flip of her hair, she turned on a heel and pranced across the stage. A young stage tech directed her to the exit.

Matt slid his hands into his front pockets. “I get the impression you don’t want to spend the rest of the day with me.”

Tessa sighed. “It’s not that, but I have a responsibility to her. This is a big city.”

“She’s a big girl. How old is she? Eighteen? Nineteen?”

“Um… Yes. And that’s still young.” She dropped the mic and battery pack on the couch. “I suppose I can go. It shouldn’t take long.”

“I’m not sure how I should feel. The show led me to believe you wanted to see me.” Yet, she obviously didn’t want to be with him. She couldn’t get away quick enough.

“Matt, I swear, I had nothing to do with this. I thought I was getting a makeover.”

“I admit my curiosity is piqued. Why did the show think to call me at all? I mean, we had one night.” He smiled. “One
great
night, but we didn’t exactly run in the same social circles.”

“You know—” she chewed her lower lip, “—we should probably go. The limo driver is waiting.” She brushed her palms down her skirt then walked toward the stage exit.

After unclipping his mic from his suit coat, he dropped it next to hers. Then he caught up with Tessa. “You don’t want to tell me, do you?” He chuckled and her shoulders stiffened.

“Really Matt, I don’t think you know me well enough to gauge my reactions.”

And he realized he’d like to…know her better. “Then would you care to explain?”

She rolled her shoulders. “Not particularly.”

They followed one of the stage techs to the waiting limo. The driver opened the rear door of the black stretch. Tessa’s dress hiked high on her leg as she slid into the vehicle. Staring at trim thighs, his eyes traveled to sexy, smooth-as-silk knees and curved calves. Once sitting in position, she crossed her bare legs at the ankles. Even her feet looked sexy in high heels.

“Thanks,” he said to the driver, then climbed into the vehicle.

Matt had the choice of sitting next to her or he could take the seat opposite and face her. He slid onto the seat across and stretched his legs. “Wow. Nice.” He glanced at the amenities provided by the show. Champagne chilled in a bucket. Fresh fruit filled a basket and the small fridge was stocked with soda and mini bottles.