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Authors: D.H. Starr

BOOK: Wrestling With Desire
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Bryce rolled his eyes. "I think so, but there's an intensity about Beck that I don't think anyone could rival. Don't get me wrong. I worship her. She is amazing. But she kind of scares me sometimes too. Do you know that she made me watch both versions of the
Hairspray
movie? The John Waters version with Ricki Lake and the one that just came out with Nikki Blonsky."

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Wrestling With Desire

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Derek laughed, "I'm surprised she didn't make you go to New York with her to watch the Broadway musical as well."

"Oh, she tried. She even said that if I didn't go, and then fucked up, she would take my nuts, put them in a blender, and feed them back to me in a cup." Bryce shuddered remembering the threat.

Derek laughed and patted Bryce on the shoulder. "You should feel complimented. You aren't a true friend of Beck's unless she's threatened some horrific violence against your balls." Derek looked around the living room. "Speaking of Beck, have you seen her?"

Bryce looked as if he had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. "She told me not to tell you."

Derek looked at Bryce with a combination of confusion and irritation. "Bryce. Where's Beck?"

"She said that she'd—."

"BRYCE! Where's Beck."

"She ran outside to get sick." Derek took a menacing step towards him and Bryce backed away instinctively.

"How did she get sick already? We just got here."

Bryce lowered his head. "A few of us made her do some shots of vodka and maybe a few other liquors."

"You didn't. Bryce. Didn't you know that—"

"That she can't do shots. No. I had no idea."

"How many shots did she do?"

Bryce started scratching his head as he reviewed the shots. "I made her do a vodka shot. George made her do one of gin. Then Malinda made her do one of peppermint 175

Wrestling With Desire

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schnapps. That's when she grabbed her mouth and ran outside."

"Jesus Bryce. Were you guys trying to kill her? Did she do them all in a row?"

"Yeah. But she should have told us if she couldn't handle it."

Derek shook his head. "We're talking about Beck. Do you really think she would ever admit to any flaw or weakness?

You could have offered her liquefied shit and she would have drunk it just to prove a point."

Bryce trembled at the thought. "You're her best friend, right?"

"Yeah. But what has that got to do with anything?"

Bryce shuffled his feet. "It's just that Beck is the only other person who makes statements that are that disgusting without a second thought." When he looked up to face Derek, he had a slight smile on his face and his head was tilted to the side. His eyes were peering directly at him.

A wave of annoyance passed over Derek. Beck was getting sick and, no matter how proud she was, she needed someone with her. "Look, if Beck is getting sick, we need to help her out. Where is she?"

Bryce's entire posture shifted instantly in response to Derek's clipped tone. "I have no idea. I saw her run out the back door."

Derek shook his head. "Come on. Grab some water and a paper towel. We're going to make sure she's ok." Bryce did as instructed and the two of them headed into the back yard.

"I saw her head off in the direction of the cars."

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Wrestling With Desire

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Derek headed towards the cars. Near the end of the driveway, Derek heard what he had been listening for. Beck was retching just a few feet away. "Beck. Beck! Where are you?"

"Go away. I don't want anyone to see me like this." Beck's voice was raspy and hoarse.

Derek worked his way around the car where Beck's voice came from and saw her curled up on the ground next to a tire wheel. "Beck. Why on earth would you come out here alone to get sick? You could have always told someone to get me."

Beck turned her face up to look at Derek. "I don't want anyone to see me like th—" Her words were cut off by another round of heaving as she threw up bile into the snow.

Bryce stood in his spot, frozen and not knowing what to do.

Derek stomped up to Bryce. "Don't just stand there. Give me the water and the napkin." He ripped the napkin from Bryce and gently wiped Beck's mouth with a corner of it.

Tearing off the dirtied part, he wet the rest of the napkin with some water and pressed it to the back of her neck. "Here, this should help to make you feel a little bit better. Take the bottle of water and take tiny sips. Tiny sips always make me feel better when I'm sick."

Beck crawled to her hands and knees, then lowered her bottom so it was resting on her heels. "Thanks. That does make me feel a bit better." She took the water bottle and obeyed Derek's instructions, taking tiny sips. After a few minutes, she was able to lift herself up to a kneeling position.

"I am
so
never drinking vodka again, ever."

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Derek laughed. "Why were you drinking vodka in the first place? I thought you were a wino, not an alchie."

She lifted her head and peered at Derek with menacing eyes. "I will drink whatever I damn well please at my own cast party. Who in the hell do you think you a—" She doubled over once again and began to vomit some more.

Derek laughed, unable to help himself. He knew that Beck was miserable and sick, but the fact that she had been chastising him and was repaid with another round of nausea seemed like good karma. "Maybe you should spend less time using your mouth to yell at me and more time using it to sip the water I gave you."

She glared at him, but continued sipping the water. After about ten minutes, she seemed to be over the worst of it and Derek helped her to her feet. Bryce had remained still and useless the whole time. "Get over here. Help me with her."

Bryce seemed to remember how to function and walked over to Beck's other side, helping her to her feet. Slowly they made their way back to the party.

Once they got to the back yard, they hung back for few minutes until Beck was sure she was feeling good enough to go back inside. "I swear to God. If either of you tell anyone that I got sick I will take your balls, tie them together, and push one of you off a cliff, forcing the other one to have to make a choice to fall as well or to allow your balls to get ripped off in order to save yourself."

Derek looked at Bryce. "She seems to be feeling much better now. I think it's safe to bring her back inside to the 178

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party." Bryce had a horror-struck look on his face, but helped Derek walk Beck up the stairs.

Once they were safely inside the house, Beck excused herself to go to the bathroom. Bryce leaned against the wall.

"I feel like I have just been to war."

Derek looked at him like he was a leper. He had no tolerance for people who completely froze under pressure.

Sighing, he thought of the best way to get away from him so he could go find Scott. He had spent the past thirty minutes nursing Beck and, to some extent, nursing Bryce as well.

Now, he wanted to be around someone who he could actually respect. Even though he had only been gone for a half hour, he had his fill of Bryce and wanted to find Scott. With very little enthusiasm, he mustered a polite exit line. "Like I said before. You aren't a true friend of Beck's until she's threatened some form of violence against your nuts. I should probably go and check on her."

Bryce smiled, but it was timid and his hands lowered to protectively cover himself. "So you and Beck have been friends for a long time haven't you?"

Shit.
The last thing Derek wanted was to continue a conversation with Bryce. "Yeah. Since we were kids. You already asked me that. Remember?"

Bryce ignored Derek's comment. "I guess she probably told you about me being...you know."

Derek looked at Bryce, not sure what he was referring to.

Then Derek remembered and the memory hit him hard. "Uh, yeah. She called me that night that you told her."

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Bryce stepped a little closer to Derek, leaving only a few inches between them. "You know, I've never seen
you
with anyone." He reached out and placed his hand on Derek's arm.

"I've wondered whether..." The words trailed off as Bryce leveled his gaze directly at Derek with unmistakable attraction.

All of Derek's instincts went into overdrive and told him to move slowly, speak calmly. He didn't want to make any sudden movements, but the rage flowing through his veins made that a difficult task to achieve. Behind gritted teeth, Derek managed to speak in a voice that was barely above a whisper. "Bryce. I'm only going to say this once, so listen carefully. Get your fuckin' hand off of me right now. Even if I were interested in this conversation, this is
so
not the place to be having it."

Bryce didn't remove his hand. Derek had to hold his breath and count to three to calm the fury that intensified inside of him. "But I thought, I mean I hoped, that maybe we could—."

"You thought wrong. Now let go of me or else..." A sudden movement caught Derek's attention and he looked to the entrance of the kitchen. His eyes locked with Scott's. He was standing at the door and had a hurt look on his face. Turning on his heels, Scott walked out of the room.

"Shit!" Derek yanked his arm away from Bryce and rushed out of the kitchen, trying to catch up to Scott who had stormed up the stairs to the bedroom where the coats were.

"Wait. What are you doing?"

Scott started searching for his coat. "I'm going home."

Derek put his hand on Scott's arm and tried to turn him so 180

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they could face each other. Scott jerked his arm out of Derek's grip.

"What's wrong?" Derek knew that he had seen Bryce's hand on his arm in the kitchen, but he found it hard to believe that Scott could actually think that anything was going on between them.

"Nothing's wrong. Why don't you just go back downstairs and hang out with your new boyfriend?"

Scott's tone was sarcastic, but Derek could hear a quivering in his voice underneath the stoic front. Stunned, he opened his mouth and then closed it again. It took him a moment to compose himself before he could speak. "My, what?"

Scott turned on Derek with a vicious look in his eyes.

"Bryce, your new boyfriend. I have been looking for you for the past half hour. I couldn't find you anywhere. Next thing I know I see the two of you hanging off of each other like two little..." The quivering became more pronounced and Scott turned away from Derek, continuing his search for his jacket.

Derek was distinctly aware of two warring emotions playing inside his head. On the one side, he was panicking.

He didn't want Scott to be upset with him and he was afraid that Scott might pull away from him or worse, break up with him, over a simple misunderstanding. On the other hand, he felt a warm tingle creep up his spine and fill his chest.
Scott is
jealous of Bryce. Ridiculous, but sweet nonetheless.
"Scott, I was looking for Beck and Bryce brought me to her."

"And that took you thirty fucking minutes?"

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Wrestling With Desire

by D.H. Starr

Derek shook his head. He didn't want Scott to be this upset over nothing. "Beck was getting...she made me promise not to tell anyone, but you need to know. Just keep in mind, when I tell you, if you mention it to her I may still be your boyfriend, but I won't have any balls." Scott's glare didn't soften. There was no hint of a smile. Derek sighed, realizing that humor would get him nowhere until Scott calmed down. "Beck was getting sick and I was helping her.

Bryce was with me because he had to show me where Beck was."

Scott didn't look at him, but he had stopped looking for his coat. "Let's say I believe that Beck got sick. Then what was going on between you and Bryce in the kitchen?"

Derek had wanted to avoid going into details. Scott was an understanding person, but not as cautious as Derek. If the roles had been reversed, Derek was pretty sure that even if he was upset, he would have waited before making any kind of a scene. Once he let Scott know that Bryce had come onto him, he wasn't sure how Scott would react and he didn't want to be the center of a gay teenage drama with the whole senior class watching. Still, Scott needed to know. If he and Scott were a couple, then there was no room for secrets. Not when a question was asked directly like Scott had just done.

"Look. Please. Promise me you won't go bananas when I tell you."

Scott stiffened and turned to face Derek. "Just tell me already. Whatever you have to say can't be worse than what went through my mind when I saw the two of you together holding each other in the kitchen."

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When Scott turned to face him, Derek could see his eyes were red and glistening.
Jesus. He's really upset about this.

"Ok, but please at least try not to fly off the handle." Derek took a deep breath. "After we got Beck back inside, she went to the bathroom. After she left, Bryce kind of..." He didn't want to say it. Once the words were out he would have no control over how Scott reacted. "Bryce basically came out to me and then hit on me. That's what you saw when you came to the kitchen. I'm pretty sure he was about to tell me he hoped that I might be interested in him. Fortunately for him, you showed up and distracted me just before I was about to punch him in the face."

Scott stood still. Derek searched his face, but couldn't read any emotion there. Finally, Scott's shoulders sagged as he let out a deep breath. "I guess I was wrong. That
is
worse than what I imagined."

"What?" Derek felt that it was safe to walk closer to Scott without him continuing to pull away. "What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking that the two of you were flirting."

"And how is what I just said worse than that?"

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