Year of Living Blonde (Sweet Life in Seattle, Book 1) (56 page)

He’s looking at her as Anthony does.

With desire.

If only he’d looked at me like that when we were still married.

She puts her glass down.

“It’s time you went home,” she tells him.

“Do you really think your relationship with this guy is going to last forever?”

“I don’t know.” Natalie thinks about last night. It was wonderful. Anthony is wonderful in every way. They haven’t discussed the future, but that doesn’t mean they don’t have one.

Peter stares into his glass, swirling the dark liquid. “It won’t.” He looks up at her. “After meeting him, I can tell you it’s not just the age difference, either. You and I are the same kind of people. That’s why it always worked between us. But he’s different.”

She stares at Peter.

He nods. “I can tell by the expression on your face you know exactly what I’m talking about.” He reaches over to take her hand. “I made a big mistake, but let’s not compound it. Let’s not waste any more time.”

Suddenly, Chloe bounces around the corner into the kitchen. “How’s it going in here?” She’s smiling and when she sees that Peter is holding Natalie’s hand, her smile grows even wider. “Have you guys made up? Is Daddy moving back home?”

Natalie takes in the joy on her daughter’s face. She can’t remember the last time she’s seen Chloe this happy, not even when she found out Peter was buying her a horse. It squeezes her heart. All she’s ever wanted was the one thing she didn’t have growing up—a happy and secure family. She wants that dream for Chloe, especially. But at what price?

She draws her hand away from Peter’s. “I don’t think—”

“We’re working on it, sweetie,” he tells Chloe. “We just have to give your mom a little more time.”

“You are so
not
getting back together with the ass clown!” Lindsay says with disgust after Natalie tells her what happened with Peter. “Have you lost your mind?”

Natalie sighs. “I probably have. But you didn’t see the expression on Chloe’s face.”

This gives Lindsay pause. Chloe is the one weak link in the chain of Lindsay’s eternal hatred of Peter.

The two of them are sitting in the living room, drinking the rest of the bottle Peter opened earlier. Chloe went over to a friend’s house. Before she left, though, she was so excited, hugging Natalie and telling her how happy it made her to see Daddy home again. Natalie wishes Peter hadn’t said anything at all to Chloe. It was inappropriate to get her involved, but Peter obviously didn’t see it that way. Natalie’s been thinking about his visit all day. It’s hard to put it out of her mind.

“What about Anthony?” Lindsay asks. “You just told me he’s in love with you. I’d take Anthony over Peter any day of the week.”

“He’s six years younger than me.”

“So what? That’s nothing.”

Natalie picks up her glass. “Peter says the whole older-woman-younger-man relationship is doomed to fail.”

“
Peter says?
” Lindsay is incredulous. “Who gives a damn what Peter says? He’ll say anything to get you back.”

“He has some insight because of Lena.”

Lindsay punches a couch pillow, then picks it up and throws it across the room where it lands in the corner. “I don’t think I can listen to any more of this without screaming!”

“It’s not that I want to get back with him, but he made some good points.”

“He wants you back because he misses his mommy. That’s all.”

Natalie shakes her head. Lindsay is not exactly the most objective person to talk to about this. Ironically, a weird part of her wishes she could talk to Anthony. He’s become her best friend. Plus, he’s so good at seeing all sides to a problem.

“So where were you last night?” Natalie asks, changing the subject. “I know you didn’t sleep here.”

Lindsay picks up her glass and brings it to her mouth. “I hooked up with Giovanni.” She takes a sip of wine.

Natalie closes her eyes and lets out a deep breath. She opens them and glares at her sister. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Nope, I’m serious.”

“Where did this happen?”

Lindsay licks her lips. “We went to a hotel.”

“Are you going to see him again?”

“I doubt it.”

“So you had a one night stand with Anthony’s brother? I think it’s my turn to scream now, of all the men at that party? How could you?”

Lindsay shrugs. “What’s the big deal? So I slept with Giovanni. It was
nothing.
Trust me.”

Natalie’s eyes flash to her sister. There’s a strange note in Lindsay’s voice. One she hasn’t heard before. “What exactly happened?”

“Do you really want all the details?”

“No, but something unusual happened, I can tell.”

Lindsay finishes the rest of her wine, picks up the bottle, and pours more into her glass. “He disappeared—okay? I woke up alone in a hotel room this morning.”

Natalie takes this in. She’s never had a one night stand, but assumes that’s how they work. “Isn’t that normal for this kind of thing?”

There’s a snobbish expression on Lindsay’s face. “Not for me it isn’t. Nobody
ever
leaves me. I
always
leave first.”

“I see. How was the sex?”

Lindsay grows quiet. Leans back on the couch.

“Was it bad?” Natalie has to admit she’s not surprised. Giovanni seemed like an arrogant asshole.

Lindsay runs her finger around the rim of her glass. “The sex was . . .” She trails off. “I can’t quite put it into words.”

“Honestly, I thought he seemed like a jerk. Even though he is Anthony’s brother.”

Lindsay sighs with annoyance. “I can’t believe I’m admitting this, but it was probably the best I’ve ever had.”

“Really?” Natalie is astonished. She doesn’t know exactly how many men Lindsay has slept with, but she knows it’s more than a few.

“Yeah,” she says softly.

“I’m really surprised. He seemed so arrogant.”

“He is kind of arrogant, but he’s also got this other quality. He’s deep. Soulful.” Lindsay thinks about it some more. “I thought we connected.”

“Until he disappeared.”

“Yeah.” There’s a hard expression on Lindsay’s face. “Until that happened.”

“Maybe it’s best you just forget about him. Like you said, you’ll probably never see him again.”

“You’re right.” A slow smile pulls on her mouth. “Unless, of course, you marry Anthony.”

Natalie chuckles. “And wouldn’t that be awkward at family gatherings? You and Giovanni with your one night stand.” She takes another sip of wine, thinking back to her conversation with Peter again. “I don’t want to give up Anthony.”

“Then don’t.”

“But we’ve had our problems, too. He isn’t perfect.”

Though who am I kidding? Anthony is as close to perfection as I’ll ever get.
Just the idea of giving up Anthony makes her feel ill.

“But there’s Chloe to think of,” Natalie says. “I want her to be happy, to have stability. That means more to me than anything.”

Natalie’s not sure how it happens exactly, but Peter starts coming to dinner almost every night. Chloe invites him and is so excited, Natalie doesn’t say no. How can she deprive Chloe of seeing her dad? And she loves seeing that smile on her daughter’s face. To his credit, Peter is a perfect gentleman and doesn’t try to pressure her about getting back together anymore. Instead, he brings her gifts. Flowers the first night, then chocolates, and then a pair of earrings shaped like cupcakes. She has to admit they’re whimsical and charming. Though she doesn’t wear them.

The most noticeable thing is that he eats.

A lot.

“It’s like you’re starved or something,” she tells him one night, watching him dig into a large slice of caramel cake. He’s already had two helpings of eggplant lasagna.

“I can’t believe I was married to a woman who can cook and bake like you do and I didn’t appreciate it more.”

Natalie blinks with surprise.

Peter swallows a mouthful of cake and his expression grows serious. “I took a lot of things for granted. Things I shouldn’t have.”

Chloe is on cloud nine. “Is it okay if Daddy stays and we have family game night? Please? Pretty please?”

Peter and Chloe both love complicated board games. It was one of the things the three of them always did together as a family. Natalie finds herself going along with it, as it’s difficult to say no.

Later, when Peter goes to the bathroom and she’s alone with Chloe, her daughter smiles and bounces in her chair. “Thank you so much for letting Daddy come over. It feels just like home again!”

And this simple comment knocks the wind out of Natalie.

She hasn’t mentioned Peter’s visits to Anthony. They haven’t been doing their usual texting because he hasn’t replaced her phone yet. When they talked yesterday, he kept apologizing and telling her he’ll do it soon. Anthony also asked if she got her period, and she told him no, but it wasn’t due. He still sounded amazingly calm about the whole thing.

In truth, between meeting Anthony’s parents, and Peter’s reappearance, she’s been keeping her distance a little. Anthony wanted her to come over tonight, but she told him she couldn’t. Understandably since winning the medal, he’s been busy and distracted with reporters and meetings. There’s even talk of him flying to London soon. Peter couldn’t have chosen a better time to infiltrate her life.

“You were right about the horse,” Peter tells her after their game night and after Chloe has gone to bed. They’re sitting on the couch together in the family room. “We should have waited until Chloe was older. I don’t know what I was thinking.”

Natalie nods in agreement. “There’s not much to be done about it.”

“I’ve moved out of Lena’s.” His voice is quiet.

Her brows go up as she takes this in. “Where are you living?”

“A hotel, for now. I’ll start looking for a place soon.”

“Was Lena very upset?”

He shrugs. “She wasn’t happy, but I told her she could keep the ring and I think that helped. She knew things weren’t good between us anymore.”

“What happened? I thought you two were in love.”

Peter lets out a low sigh. “I thought we were, too, but you were right all along.” He gives her an embarrassed smile. “It was just a midlife crisis. There were all these things I thought I was missing out on—not realizing I already had the life most people dream of.”

Natalie decides to be honest. “Our problems weren’t all you. I was work-obsessed and didn’t want to look at myself too closely. I was afraid of what I might find. And I know I can be stubborn sometimes,” she admits.

Peter relaxes. “You’ve really changed. And I don’t just mean on the outside. I could tell right away after I saw you again. You were always a diamond in the rough, but now you are a diamond.”

Natalie doesn’t know what to say to this.

Peter moves closer to her on the couch.

She looks at him, thinks about what Chloe said earlier, and in so many ways Peter does feel like home. “You broke my heart.”

He’s watching her and his expression softens. “I know. And you have to believe me when I say I’m sorry.”

“How can I ever trust you again?”

His hand goes up and touches her hair. She stills. It’s strange to let any man but Anthony touch her. He brushes her hair back and his fingers caress her neck. She doesn’t stop him, though. A part of her is curious.

“It’s a leap of faith,” he says. “You have to choose to trust me again.”

She turns to him. Peter’s eyes meet hers and then he leans in and kisses her. It’s nothing like Anthony’s erotic kisses. But it’s Peter. His familiar scent and tender lips. And it isn’t fair to compare him to Anthony.

“I don’t want to rush you,” he says when he draws back. “But you should know I want you in every way.”

There it is again. Natalie sees it, the desire in his eyes.

“Okay,” she whispers. “Let me think about all this.”

After he leaves, Natalie sits and tries to make sense of things. It feels as if her life has been moving in uncharted waters for so long. Maybe this is her chance to find her way again, get back on course.

Suddenly, there’s a knock on the door. It’s late enough she figures it must be Peter, but when she opens it there’s a jolt of surprise.

Anthony is standing there.