Years of Summer: Lily's Story (10 page)

A resounding chorus of “NO” rang through the room.  We were all laughing.  We were one tired bunch.  When we were through with supper we all walked back to mine and Chelsea’s room.  It was closest to the doors.  Everyone stayed and talked until about ten and then everyone started yawning.  We said our goodbyes and then parted ways.  When we finally made it to bed we had no problem falling asleep.

April flew by and then it was nearing finals time.  Our English final was a paper and ten compare/contrast questions on various things we had read throughout the semester. I hated it, but made it through fine, so did Jace and the others.  Jace and I worked on sociology together and came through with flying colors on that final and we did well on the rest too.

Bring on summer.  Jace and I spent the majority of our summer together.  We went to the beach with his family and we went to the beach with my family.  Two beach trips in one summer.  We had a blast.  On the final evening before we were supposed to head home I found myself wandering out into the backyard of his condo and brought myself back to a place in my memory where we began our summer. I stood on the very spot where I committed myself to Jace for the long run and went back through that day of Spring Break when I finally realized what Jace meant to me. I just stood and stared at the stars and again the moon was full. It was a beautiful night. All of a sudden his strong arms were around me. “Taking yourself back Lily bell?”

“Yeah, I couldn’t help myself.  Jace, I’m so glad we’re together.”

“I am too Lily Grace, I hope you never have any regrets.”

“At this moment Jace, I regret nothing; please don’t ever give me reason to.”

“I am trying my best to make sure that doesn’t happen. I love you so much Lily, you are so much a part of me.”

I knew that and he knew I felt the same way about him, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that he was not going to be with me always.  I just blurted it out.

“I feel the same way about you Jace, but why do I have the feeling that you’re not going to be around forever?”

“Lily that is a ridiculous question.  Are any of us going to be around forever?”

I laughed, despite what I was feeling at that moment.  “No, I guess you’re right. None of us will be around forever.”

“Then let’s make a pact.”

“Okay, what about?”

“Let’s make a pact to make the most of everyday as if it were our last together. Will you do that?  Will you make that pact with me?”

That felt like the only thing I could do. “Yes Jace, I promise to make the most of every day I’m with you.”

“That’s my Lily bell.”  Then he looked deep into my eyes and kissed me long and passionately.  I felt it; I felt the longing to be with him to share everything with him, but being the southern gentleman that he was, looked at me and said, “I want you to have no regrets Lily and your name is as pure as the white flowers it represents.  I won't take that from you.  I love you and love should never have any regrets.”

I leaned into his chest and cried as I wrapped my arms around him.

“Lily bell why are you crying?”

“Jace, I feel like one day I’m going to wake up and you’ll be gone. I’m scared to go to rush camp, because I don’t know if you’ll be here when I return.”

“Lily, if it is within my power, I will be. Don’t give up on me. Expect what you want and somehow I know it will be fine. You are keeping me where I am. Believe that with all your heart.  Promise me.”

“Okay, I will promise you. I expect you to be here when I get back.”

“Then I will be.” 

He gave me his best Jace smile and I knew it would be okay for now.  I wondered what he meant by I am keeping him where he is.  It was like I was a mission or something.  It always seemed that way to me.  I didn’t quite understand that, but I let it go. I didn’t want to waste any time I had with him on something I didn’t understand. 

The next Monday I left for a week long rush camp in Savannah, Georgia. Brianna’s grandparents owned a little bed and breakfast there. They allowed her to use the place because this was a slow month for them. Chelsea, me, and Jillian rode with Brianna. Our caravan of about six cars, each having a sign with our sorority letters on it, made our way to Savannah, Georgia to the Bremlin Bed and Breakfast. It was beautiful.

I had always heard that Savannah, Georgia was a beautiful old southern city lost in the modern society. They had their own ways about them and it screamed old south, like
Gone with the Wind
old south or at least where her grandparents bed and breakfast was. There were porch swings all around the wrap-around porch, weeping willows scattered the lawn around the edge, a huge brick barbeque pit was in the back and the beautiful charm of an antebellum south two-story mansion held its grace. There were ten rooms and five bathrooms. Each room held two double beds or four twin-size beds. I brought my camera and took pictures so Jace could see how beautiful this place was. I thought of him and my heart ached and I felt tears fighting to come to the surface. I didn’t try to fight them back; I knew I would feel better if I cried. Today was free day and we were given free reign of what we wanted to do. I decided to write Jace a letter and mail it to him. Wouldn’t he be surprised? I sat on one of the porch swings and began writing.

Dear Jace,

I sit here in this beautiful place and I think of you. My heart aches because you are not with me. I love you more than words can ever say. I wish you were here so I could share the beauty of this place with you, but since you’re not I am taking pictures to share with you when I come home. It feels like I am a million miles away from you and I cannot phone you. This place only has a pay phone. I didn’t bring enough quarters. I wish I had. Just hearing your voice right now would make me feel so much better. I hope you are keeping your promise to me, that you will be there when I come home, because I am counting on that. Every moment I am away from you feels like an eternity and we still have four days to go. Good Lord willing we will be home Friday afternoon and I fully expect you to be standing there waiting on me when I pull into the driveway. We have to go back to college in a week and then Rush is on, the rush to get everything ready. I look forward to the times on the quad with you and me just sitting on our blanket and watching people. I will feel better knowing that all I have to do is pick up the phone and call you. I love you. I will see you soon. 

Yours Forever,

Lily Grace

I folded the letter and addressed it and mailed it off that next day at lunch.  It would probably get there Thursday.  Today though was only Tuesday.  We still had three more days to go.  I was glad that Rush practice kept us so busy.  That gave me less time to think of Jace, although he was still in the back of my mind and at the forefront of my heart.  Our schedule was rigid and packed.  Chelsea had definitely done her job.  We barely had time to breathe.  We actually had to exercise before we began to get our muscles warmed up, because some of the dance steps were rigorous. If I didn’t know better I would have believed Chelsea was bringing some of her dance line training into our skits.  The more I thought about it the more I realized that is exactly what she was doing, but that is also why we always had a huge number of girls wanting to be an ADPi. Some of them lasted and some of them didn’t but we had so many.  Each night we were tired and barely able to keep our eyes open through dinner. It was amazing to see that many college girls all get in bed by nine o’clock at the latest, but we also had to get up at the crack of dawn to start practicing. 

It went that way the whole week and then Friday dawned, and although we were up, Chelsea, as well as Mrs. Harper, and Sydney went easy on us because we had done such a tremendous job that week. We ran through each skit one last time and it was almost perfect.  Chelsea had written up—well told me to write up—the schedule for the week before rush week and she had copies made and gave one to each of us. 

“Sisters, don’t lose these, they will be your lifeline the week before Rush. I am proud of all that we have accomplished this week and I will see you in two weeks. Get ready! We are going to have the best Rush yet!” We all cheered and then went to get our things; we had to check out by ten. 

We all thanked Brianna’s grandparents for the use of their place and packed up the car and traveled home. I couldn’t wait to see Jace, and Chelsea, Jillian, and Brianna were looking forward to seeing their guys too. We also couldn’t wait to get back into the normal routine of a typical college day and that would only be one more week.

I had left my car at Brianna’s house and so had Chelsea and Jillian.  So they would be ready for us to get into and head home. I thanked Brianna and jumped in my car after I pulled my stuff out of her trunk and threw it in mine. In twenty minutes I would see Jace. I had to keep myself from speeding home. I pulled into my gravel drive and creeped my way slowly down the road and turned into my driveway and there was Jace and Ally too. He held up the letter that I had mailed him and as soon as I parked he was at my door about to rip it off the hinges. We couldn’t get to each other fast enough. He pulled me out of the car and I jumped up and wrapped my arms and legs around him as he spun me around. You would think we hadn’t seen each other in a year instead of a week. 

“Oh Lily, I missed you so bad.  I didn’t think it was possible to miss you that much.”

“Jace, I missed you too.  I missed you so much it hurt.  Don’t ever let me go.”

“I wasn’t planning on it.”  He let me down and then we kissed more passionately long than we ever have before.  He pulled away gently and mouthed “no regrets”.  I understood what he was saying as Ally cleared her throat really loudly.  I almost forgot she was there.

“Well sis what am I the evil witch with a wart on her nose?”

“No, Ally, I missed you too.”  I went to her and hugged her. 

“I’m glad you’re home. He (pointing to Jace) has been bugging me and Connor to death.”

“Where is Connor?  I don’t see his car.”

“He went to get him some lunch.  I had already eaten by the time he came over and Jace had too.”

I looked at Jace.  “How long
have
you been here?”

“About two hours.  I was hoping you had left early.”

“You were able to bug my sister to death in a matter of two hours?  I think that’s a record.”

“Well I just missed you so much and according to this (he held up the letter) you fully expected me to be waiting in your driveway when you drove up.  I didn’t want to disappoint you.”

I kissed him again.  “Definitely no disappointment here.”

“Good, so what do you want to do first?”

“Can you help me unpack my car?”

“I most surely can.”  I popped the trunk and he carried my suitcase and overnight bag into the house.  Two more weeks and then our junior year of college would begin.

* * * * * * *

We were sitting on my deck stairs.  That last week of regular summer went by fast and by the time it came for me to leave again he couldn’t stand it.  “I can’t be without you Lily, I am coming with you.”

“Jace, the only dorms open right now are the dorms with sororities in them, where are you going to stay?”

“I’ll stay at the fraternity house. It’s only for a week, well, actually three days. They are opening campus Thursday.  Then I can get into my room. Do you mind?”

“Do I mind if I get to see you during a week I normally wouldn’t have, now that is a stupid question?”

“Good, I was hoping you would say that.”

“Why would you doubt that?”

“I don’t know; I feel like I am bugging you to death.”

“Why?”

“It’s just I have never felt this way about anyone before and I want to spend every waking hour with you.  I would even be driving me crazy.”

JOKINGLY, I said, “Well then why don’t you just marry me Jace and get it over with?”  (Although I wanted nothing more in the world than that.)

He actually thought about it.  “You know, I could find me a job and a place and we could get married and I could finish college later.”

I looked at him dumbfounded.  “Are you serious?”

“Well, yeah I’m serious.  I love you, Lily, I can’t imagine my life without you.”

Then I found myself saying no to him.  “Jace, we can’t do that right now.  We both need to finish college and then find jobs and then maybe, but you know as well as I do we can’t do that now.”

Reality hit him in the face as his smile dropped, and was replaced by defeat. I never would have thought what was to be.

“Yeah, you’re right; we can’t get married right now. I just wish there was a way.”  He looked up to the sky and choked up as tears came into his eyes.  He didn’t want me to see that I guess, even though I did anyway. It was as if his heart just broke.  It scared me the way he reacted. 

“Jace, what is it?” 

He looked deep into my eyes.  “Do you promise to stand by that pact we made at the beach before you left for rush camp, no matter what?”

“Yes, I promise with all my heart to stand by that pact.  I love you, Jace.  I cannot imagine my life without you.”

His answer was strange.  “I sincerely hope you never have too.”  The way he answered made tears well in my eyes.