You Are Mine (28 page)

The conversation halts.

“
Yes, Chancellor Zade.” I
put on a sorrowful face for the girls. “Do you mind continuing
without me?”

“
No,” Cynthia says. “We'll
take care of things.”

“
I don't know what I would
do without you,” I say.

“
Not have a very good
ball,” she says.

“
Very true.”

The girls laugh and I join them. I
grab my cloak and exit the shop with Zade.

“
Thank you,” I say to
Zade. “I don't mind a few details, but that was too much. I don't
know why they enjoy it so much.”

“
So, they'll basically
plan it for you?”

“
Shameful, isn't
it?”

He walks away from the
carriage.

The day is clear with a light breeze,
but I shouldn't just walk around town. It wouldn't be seemly. At
least, Father always said it wouldn't. “Where are you off
to?”

“
Nowhere. I don't really
have any errands. You're not the only one that couldn't sit any
longer.”

“
Should we take the
carriage?”

“
Why? It's such a nice
day.”

“
Should I really be going
around town this much? Besides, this is the tarnished side of
town.”

“
So? You found Katherine
here.”

That I did, but how does that make
this acceptable? Before I can argue further, he sets off. I pull my
cloak tighter around me, making sure it covers the engagement mark
on my neck. It feels more conspicuous in the tarnished section of
town. Though without being bald and having an inked face, it
matters little. It makes me less jittery though.

We walk in silence for a while. Soon,
I grow more comfortable and take in my surroundings. Despite always
hearing about tarnished being less than nothing, it's a nice area
of town. Nicer than some areas inhabited by warlocks, and not at
all like the rumors. The shops are tidy. We peek in a few windows.
I'm surprised to see they don't look any different than the regular
shops, except for the people running them, of course.

When we move to the housing district,
the yards are trim and well-kept. The houses are smaller than
Father's, but have more wild flowers growing next to them. The
walkways are neat and clean. We come to a park, not a person in
sight.

“
Would you like to wander
through?” Zade asks.

“
It looks
lovely.”

As I follow him into the park, the
space between us lessens. I have the strangest urge to touch him.
His arm maybe, or perhaps his hand. A part of me really wants to,
but it seems like the wrong thing to do. I let a bit of distance
grow between us and try to focus on the scenery. There's green
everywhere with lots of winding paths. A small river runs through
part of it with a bridge over it. A man appears in the distance. I
think nothing of him until Zade slows.

“
What is it?”

He shakes his head, but there's
something. Everything about his movements becomes stiffer. My
nerves heighten in response. A small part of me wishes I had a gun
to pull out of my pocket. But it wouldn't help anyway, probably
would only get us in more trouble. No matter what Zade thinks,
women don't carry guns. A moment later the man is upon
us.

“
Chancellor Zade, didn't
think to see you here. This is
—
” his gaze roams over me.
“Your intended? What are you bringing her here for?”

It's then I realize that this is a
warlock. No tattoos and a full head of hair. Do they wander down
here often? His words to Zade make me think not, yet he is here.
Better than him being the person threatening Zade's life, yet my
muscles grow even more taut. What if he sees the dress I'm
wearing?

“
Just showing her where
she'll end up if she misbehaves. Really none of your business
though, Councilman Barkley.”

Another councilman. Worse and worse.
My chest tightens. I step back and lower my head, watching them
interact through my lashes.

The man casts a gray apology spell.
“So magnanimous of you to share such a grand idea. I'll have to
bring my woman here next time she misbehaves. We have children so I
can't really do it, but she doesn't need to know that.”

Memories of Father punishing mother
surfaces. A part of me wants to force this man's ideas back on
himself. The other part wants to find his wife and comfort her.
Maybe even hide her from him. But none of those things can happen.
I'd be dead or tarnished and Zade along with me.

“
If you think it will
help,” Zade says.

“
Course it will. The only
thing that scares them more than us is the thought of becoming
tarnished. Isn't that why you brought her here?”

“
Women behave differently
to punishments is all.”

“
No, no, you've finally
stumbled on a good idea. You haven't owned a woman long enough to
know, but they need a firm hand. Remember that advice with your new
toy.”

I'm not a toy. Anger burns deep in my
chest, but I do nothing. There's nothing I can do.

“
Course Envadi scare them
plenty. Must work well for you, huh?” the Councilman
asks.

“
As you say.”

“
Your woman does seem
upset.” His eyes roam over me and I'm extra grateful for the cloak
hiding my dress. I try to pull my expression into a neutral one.
When did I get so bad at hiding my feelings?

Zade steps in front of me. “She's not
yours to worry over.”

“
Right you are.” The man
chuckles. “About the proposed tarnished law, you're going to
support it.”

“
I haven't researched it
enough to know, yet.”

“
Best get to it then.
Being nineteen doesn't excuse you from not doing your work.” He's
only nineteen? I didn't know he was so young. The man continues,
“The Grand Chancellor was working on the council at eighteen.
You've no excuse. We expect better.”

“
That we can agree
on.”

It's silent. The type of silence there
used to be before Father punished me. I shift a bit so I can see
the Councilman. His eyes are narrowed at Zade as if searching for a
deeper meaning. “Good. Best be on my way. Got a lunch appointment
waiting for me, if you take my meaning. Before you leave, you
should take her by the Red District, too. That will put the fear in
her.”

My cheeks flame as he passes by, his
gaze lingering. Zade moves in front of me again. The man laughs as
he passes out of sight. I can't decide whether I'm more angry about
his behavior or my inability do anything about it.

Quietly, Zade says,
“Sorry.”

Despite the warmth of my cloak and the
mild day, I shiver. “It's not you.”

“
But I want
to
—
” He
huffs and puts his hands on his hips. “Things shouldn't be like
this, for you, for women, for the tarnished.”

“
What should they be
like?”

He finally looks at me.
“Different.”

What does he know that he's not
saying? Maybe he doesn't know anything. Maybe he's just wishing
aloud. I've wished it enough myself. Yet, there has to be more. I
want there to be a reason behind the thought. How can things be
different?

Chapter
Twenty-Six

A
couple weeks later, I debate whether or not to include
Waverly in on an idea I have. She would be the perfect person to
consult, but something about how close she and Zade are stops
me.

“
Anything else?” she
asks.

“
No, thank you.” I'll ask
Cynthia to assist. Bethany may help mother with the parties, but
Cynthia helps mother with the furniture. And I won't have to spend
extra time around Waverly wondering what's between her and
Zade.

I head for Cynthia's room and knock on
her door.

“
Morning,” she says. “Come
in. One of the servants wanted to fix my hair, but she couldn't get
it the way Waverly has been doing yours. I was going to attempt it
myself, but if I can't figure it out either, I was going to give
Waverly a ring. What do you think?”

“
Let me help.” I settle
myself behind her.

While I do her hair, I worry over
asking her. Maybe I shouldn't. Women don't make decisions like
this. We always wait for the men to tell us to do them. But I
really want to do something to help Zade. Forget what others think
I should be doing, I will do this. “When we're done here, would you
help me with something.”

“
With what?

“
The Chancellor isn't
comfortable in any of the furniture we have. We should get him
items that are bigger.”

“
That's easy enough to
fix. Did he have anything specific in mind?”

“
Not really. At least one
bigger chair.” It seems silly not to correct her, but it's strange
for me to do this without being asked. And he would be more
comfortable in things his size. Besides it's a way I can return the
favor for everything he's done. “And I haven't seen his bed
chamber, but perhaps a bigger bed. A better chair in the dining
room, as well. Things for his study?”

She nods. “Perhaps we should look
around the house and see if anything would work. It would be faster
than waiting to order it.”

“
I didn't think of that.
It's a splendid idea.”

“
It may help give us a
better idea of what he needs if we see what he has currently. Is he
in today?”

“
No, there's a council
meeting.”

“
I wonder what they talk
about so much.” A faraway look enters her eyes.

“
Me, too.” Like, what that
tarnished law Councilman Barkley in the park was talking about.
What is it all about? Will it affect Katherine?

“
In any case, it will give
us a chance to look around without bothering him. Father always
hated it when mother and I tried to figure out what furniture he
needed while he was getting work done.”

Sounds like him. But I don't want to
think of him. “Let's go then.”

We cross along the length of the
house. It feels strange not taking any stairs to get where we are
going. I twist my hands together. Maybe this wasn't such a good
idea. I stare at his door. “Are you sure we should check
now?”

She nods vigorously. “You remember the
time Father hexed you mute for a week?”

“
After I said you'd done
it because I said you had to.” The memory is at the back of my mind
with all the others I keep pushed back. “I never knew what you were
doing for that one.”

“
I was going through his
study taking inventory of what he'd broken and needed replaced.
While working I made the mistake of singing and he came in and
caught me at it.”

“
That explains the
muteness. I never did get the chance to ask. By the time I got my
voice back, mother had another baby.”

She plays with her fingernails.
“Thanks for always doing that for me. I never told you, but it
meant a lot to me.”

“
Oh, Cynthia.” Remembering
how it made me feel when Katherine wrapped her arms around me and I
hugged her back, I can't help but try likewise with my sister. At
first, she's tense under my embrace, but soon she relaxes into
tears. I pat her back. “It's all right, Cynthia.”

“
It's not,” she says
between sobs. “You were punished so many times for me.”

“
And I'd do it many
more.”

“
I don't deserve you for a
sister.”

“
You're planning my ball,
I'll call that good enough.”

“
It's not enough, but I'm
trying my best.” She sniffs a few times before pulling away. “We
should investigate his room before I end up crying all day and
night and he comes home to us blocking his room.”

I grin at her. “I don't think he'd hex
us mute because of it.”

She grins back.

A cool breeze rushes past as I open
the door and enter. “That was odd.”

“
What was?”

“
Didn't you feel that cold
air?”

“
No.”

“
Huh. Must have been a
breeze or something.” The room is the same shape and size as the
one I use. The only difference is a desk shoved in by the window
and a razor, soap, and towel scattered across the vanity. And it
smells faintly of citrus, just like he does. “Look at this. His
furniture is the same as mine.”

She runs her hand across the back of a
chair. “We'll need a few chairs. He has a desk in here which I
wasn't suspecting. Perhaps we should get two for him. One for the
study and one for in here. Two beds as well, I should think. You'll
need the extra space when you're wed.”

My cheeks heat. I want to be anywhere
but here. “I suppose.” I scramble for the door. “We should go
through the house for some furniture.”

We exit, making sure to leave
everything as we found it. Starting from Chancellor Zade's side of
the house, we work our way through the rooms. The top floor holds
nothing useful for Zade, but plenty of space for guests during the
ball. If I find any guests I'd rather be near, I'll put them here.
Father will be on the ground floor.