You Majored in What? (18 page)

Jillian created a very lackluster Possible Lives Map. She wrote down a few ideas halfheartedly and stared at her paper. “I just don’t have any ideas. I’m majoring in sociology and I don’t think I can do anything, I guess. At least nothing I can think of.” We talked for a few moments and she told me that she was the first person in her family to go to college. She felt this huge burden to be “special” and fulfill everyone’s dreams for her. “I feel like a bug stuck on a pin. I can’t move anywhere.” I told her to close her eyes for a minute and just breathe. She didn’t have to go anywhere—at least not this minute. When she relaxed a little, I said, “I want you to pretend that it’s tomorrow morning and you wake up and you know exactly what you want to do. Quickly now, what is it?” She opened her eyes looked at me and said, “Nanotechnology.” We looked at each other in shock and both of us burst out laughing. Where did that come from? How did she go from “I don’t know what to do” to “Nanotechnology” in one minute? “I like reading about nanotechnology,” she said. “I know that sounds weird, but I heard about it on TV about a year ago, and I’ve been reading about it ever since: books, magazines, research. But I don’t have any formal training. It’s stupid to even think I could work in that field.” Within a week, Jillian had made a connection with a woman who had a liberal arts degree and was working at a nanotechnology research company. She invited her to intern in the summer.

Whatever you do, don’t stop. There’s a simple formula for moving forward in the chaos: Left foot. Right foot. Breathe. Repeat. And just keep wandering.

DESIGNING YOUR POSSIBLE LIVES

In Chapter 6 you’ll start developing a strategic plan for living your Possible Lives. But before you move on, you have one more step to complete: creating a Possible Lives scenario plan. Creating scenarios for your Possible Lives will serve four purposes:

1. See how clear your vision is of your Possible Lives

2. See what you know and don’t know about each Possible Life

3. Confirm your genuine interest in the Possible Life

4. Help you determine which Possible Lives to focus on first

It will be easier to set your goals and intentions in the next chapter if you can picture your Possible Lives clearly.

So take one more look at your Possible Lives Map and determine how many of your Possible Lives you’d like to proceed with. Then get out a piece of paper for each one you want to consider. (If you don’t have any Possible Lives, get out one piece of paper and jot down what you think the next month or two are going to look like. What classes will you be taking or what experiences will you be having? What would you like to happen in the next month or two? What could you do during the next month or two to start developing some ideas?) Label each page with one of your Possible Lives. Now, take a few minutes to flesh out your vision. Create a short description or story about your Possible Life. You can do this by writing a paragraph or two, a list of words, or even drawing some pictures about each of your Possible Lives. Work quickly; don’t make this an interminable process. Set a timer and only allow yourself about ten to fifteen minutes to complete the task. Just as a filmmaker creates a scenario, you’re the director of these scenarios, so make them look as concrete as possible. How do you think your life will look if you choose this option?

• Can you picture yourself living this Possible Life?

• What is it like?

• Where are you?

• What are you doing?

• What do your surroundings look like?

• How vivid are your images? Crystal clear or gauzelike?

• Have you already started taking actions toward one or more of these scenarios?

Go as far into the future as you can. For some, the furthest they can see is the end of the semester. Others can see years ahead. A common phrase in scenario planning is “long fuse/big bang.” This refers to Possible Lives that are going to take awhile to develop, but will be life changing when they finally occur. For instance, if you’re a freshman and planning to become a doctor, you have a long fuse/big bang scenario that will require years of determination.

Usually, people who have selected just one or two Possible Lives have a fairly clear picture of what their future might look like. For instance, if you’re planning to become a lawyer, you can probably picture yourself finishing college and then going to law school and ultimately starting your job at a law firm. Try listing some possible law schools or some of the classes you might take before you get to law school. If you have an idea of what kind of law you might practice, write about that. Who are your clients? How are you spending a typical day? Are you in a courtroom? Are you writing unbreakable contracts?

When you’re done, take a look at all your scenarios.

• Which ones are the strongest?

• Which were the most fun to dream about and create?

• Can you visualize yourself in all the roles?

• How does it feel to picture yourself doing your Possible Life?

• Is one scenario easier to follow than another?

• Do any of them make you a little anxious or uncomfortable? Why?

• Are any of them risky? And is the risk worth the possible outcome?

• Which ones give you energy and which ones (if any) take away your energy?

• Can you see any of them blending together in any way?

• Does one scenario stand out as a starting point with other scenarios following later?

Remember, these scenarios are not predictors of the future. They are only ideas that you have right now and they just represent different options for your life. You can keep developing them as much as you wish. Fleshing them out just helps you gain perspective. You can also abandon them if you find yourself less intrigued as you consider the details. Some people find that within seconds of starting to describe their Possible Life they’re already bored. It would be a good idea to remove that life immediately. You will quickly see where you have clear thoughts and where you need to learn more about your ideas. Don’t reject an idea just because you don’t know much about it or how you’re going to do it. If it still sounds intriguing, keep the idea.

That’s it. You’re done with your Possible Lives, at least for the moment. If you’ve completed the Possible Lives Map and analyzed it, you have really come a long way toward finding your future. Be sure to take a moment to reflect on all that you’ve accomplished since reading this chapter.

WISDOM BUILDERS

1. ARE YOU CONSIDERING A CAREER IN THE ARTS?

It’s not unusual to discover lots of creative interests on Possible Lives Maps. Most people have creative interests or pursuits and you may too. But do you have the talent or drive needed to pursue the creative field as a primary interest? This is always a dicey area: Who gets to make that decision? In theory, you should make the decision. But on the other hand, if you’ve watched
American Idol
tryouts, you have seen the, shall we say, misguided dreams of those who think they have talent. If you’re considering a professional career in the arts, you might want to assemble your own
American Idol
panel of judges. You need to find someone like Randy: a talented artist/producer who knows the business thoroughly and has managed careers of other people with talent like yours. Then, of course, you need a Paula. Someone who will be kind, encouraging, and tell you how genuine you are while offering fashion advice and motivation. Finally, you really do need a Simon. Someone who will look you in the eye and give you the most honest (if blunt) opinion of your work. It may be painful to hear, but if it’s a positive verdict, then you really know you have the talent you need.

Start thinking about who could serve those roles in your creative ventures: Your professors? Professionals in the field? If you’re considering a performing art, an audience can help—they applaud, laugh, boo, walk out, or give you a standing ovation. Whatever they do, you will have feedback. If your art is visual or written, you can post it on your Web site and actively seek feedback. Ignore the Internet crazies who always respond with ridiculous comments and non sequiturs. Look for the general audience reaction and then make your decision. Or consider asking a local store or library to display your paintings, photos, or visual pieces. Label each piece carefully with its name, your name, and even a price, if you’d like to sell it. Money talks, as they say. Or leave a clipboard with a pen attached and ask people to join your mailing list for future showings, and invite them to leave comments about your work. By the way, a negative audience reaction doesn’t always mean you should stop. It might mean that you work harder or you try new approaches. But you keep going as long as you want and are able to keep going.

Wandering Off:

WHEN A HOBBY SHOULD STAY A HOBBY

It always seems like a dream to be able to pursue something you love as a career. But some people find that turning their hobby into a career is no dream.

Alexis loved making cards and paper craft products. Everyone told her she should turn it into a business—her work was so professional. Alexis envisioned a wonderful life where she could make money crafting all day. What could be better? So she contacted a local craft store and arranged to teach several classes, and she advertised her services to make scrapbooks and other projects for customers.

She quickly learned that preparing art classes was a lot of work. She had to do the boring prep work of cutting the paper, setting up the kits, gathering the materials, writing the instructions, and then teach the class—something she found very frustrating when not everyone worked at the same pace or followed her instructions. She also learned that it wasn’t nearly as much fun to put together a project for someone else—she had to abide by their wishes, which stifled her creativity.

Alexis happily returned to crafting for fun, not for profit, doing projects as she pleased.

You Majored in
What?

2. AVOID THE THREE TOP EXCUSES FOR NOT PURSUING YOUR PLANS: AGE, EDUCATION, AND MONEY

•
Age
: Age is a state of mind. Years ago, someone wrote advice columnist Ann Landers about whether to pursue a college degree at age 40. The person commented that it might take eight years because he’d have to pursue it part time. He worried that he would be 48 by the time he finished. Her reply: “How old will you be in 8 years if you don’t pursue the degree?” So you have a choice. You’re going to be whatever age you’re going to be. The only question is do you want to be that age having achieved your dream or not? You might also think you’re too young to do something. Unless you’re running into a law or unbending rule (such as having to wait until you’re 35 to become the president of the United States), chances are you’re never too young to do what you have a passion to do.

•
Education
is another roadblock for some. It works both ways: sometimes people feel they must pursue a particular career because they have a degree in that field; others think they can’t pursue a particular career because they don’t have a degree in that field. Just because you’re getting a law degree doesn’t mean you need to practice law. And if you want to work with lawyers but don’t want a law degree, there are lots of ways to acquire the knowledge and skills you need to enter the legal field in another capacity.

•
Money.
Don’t let the potential salary in a field keep you from pursuing it. Consider pursuing it for just a year or two, or get additional education or certification that will give you a higher salary in the same field. There are often entrepreneurial ways to make money in almost any field. Most experts would tell you there’s no money in early childhood education; after all, home day-care operators seldom get rich. But don’t tell that to Julie Aigner-Clark, who created some preschool videos from her home and developed them into a multimillion-dollar business called Baby Einstein. So don’t assume that you can’t make money. The reverse is also true: don’t assume that a field that pays a lot of money will make you happy. The more a job pays, the more likely you will earn that pay in terms of the hours you’ll be expected to work and the intensity of the work. It’s not a perfect linear relationship, but if you’re not enjoying your life, the money will lose its cachet.

TWO FINAL QUESTIONS

What could you do in the next twenty-four hours to move one step closer to your Possible Life or to become a stronger candidate for it?
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As you look over all the Possible Lives you placed on your map, if you knew you couldn’t fail, which one would you choose?
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Ponder that for a while. And then it’s time to move into goal setting chaos-style.

WHERE ARE YOU NOW AND WHERE DO YOU WANT TO GO?

[It’s] like driving at night in the fog. You can only see as far as your headlights, but you can make the whole trip that way.

—E. L. DOCTOROW,
QUOTED IN WRITERS AT WORK BY GEORGE PLIMPTON, EDITOR, 8TH EDITION, 1988