Yours Unfaithfully (39 page)

“I hope not, Veronica, it’s a bit delicate and not something I want to talk about. Please don’t take that the wrong way but it might be something Mel and I have to work out between us.”

“Why am I getting bad vibrations, Tim? If it doesn’t work out, you’re going to have to tell someone. If you want an ear or a shoulder I’m around, well for two weeks at least, OK?”

“Thanks, Veronica, that’s exactly what your brother would say if he were here. You two have a lot in common, and that’s meant to be a compliment in case you were wondering.”

“That’s exactly how I took it, Tim. Don’t forget, any trouble, call for some Aussie assistance.”

Her laugh was so infectious that he joined in despite his worries.

Having safely delivered Veronica to the Manor, he set off for home and a rendezvous he would have preferred to avoid. With around fifteen hours left before he would see Mel again there was still the issue of Nina to deal with. What had started out as a simple neighbourly friendship had turned into a torrid affair based on loneliness and lust. Like a huge fire ignited with a single match, this relationship which had been so easy to start was proving incredibly difficult to extinguish.

Unless Nina was willing to sit down over a glass of wine and promise to forget everything that they had done together these past four weeks, his marriage to Mel was finished. He could blame her for leaving him at home and lonely, but she would never accept responsibility for what had happened once her back was turned. Her back had been stabbed not just by him, but by the woman she had considered her friend. Once the truth was out he would be an outcast, from his home, his family, maybe even from his job – after all Simon was a man of traditional values, this might prove to be too much, even for him.

Why, he kept asking himself, why did I throw everything away for ... for what? A romp with a good looking woman who never had time for me until her husband left her? Her husband ... my best mate... he’ll never speak to me again. I’ve blown it ... I’ve lost everything ... unless, unless Nina will promise me...

In the kitchen Trudy was busy preparing the children’s evening meal.

“Hi Tim, do you want to eat with us, I’ve made plenty. You’d better go and talk to the kids. They are excited like I’ve never seen them, counting the minutes until she arrives.”

“Oh, thanks Trudy, I’d love to, but first there’s something I’ve got to do, urgently.”

“Go round to Nina’s, I suppose?”

“Yes ... what do you mean, ‘I suppose?’”

“Well, let’s be honest, Tim, you’ve spent more time there than you have here since Mel went. Anyway, Nina came round earlier for a bit of a chat and, she asked me to send you round as soon as you got in, like you wouldn’t have anyway.”

“Trudy, we’re just neighbours, friends... she’s just lost her husband, well not lost in that sense but you know what I mean. She’s been very upset with him going and everything. Mel asked me to see she was OK ...”

“Well that’s good, because according to Nina, Melanie asked her to look after you. There’s been a lot of looking after done this past four weeks, so you should both be fine for when Mel gets here in the morning.”

Was she being sarcastic? Was she telling him that she knew what was going on? What had Nina said to her? If she knew, then there was even less chance of him getting away with it. If he asked her outright, it would be telling her what she might not know. Maybe she was just a bit suspicious. She’d never dare tell Melanie anything without proof and she had no proof. No, Trudy wasn’t a problem. Best thing was to get round to Nina and find out what she’d said to Trudy, to make her so touchy.

“Keep mine hot please Trudy, I’ll only be half an hour, at most. Tell the kids as soon as I get back we’ll plan our welcome for the morning.”

“That’s good, they’ll like that.”

Right now seeing Nina and extracting the promise of her silence was too pressing to wait another minute. He went straight in without the cursory knock, which had become his usual method of entry to her kitchen.

“Come in Tim, I’m in the lounge.”

He walked straight through the kitchen and into the lounge, where Nina was sitting, waiting for him. She was perched on the edge of the sofa in what could easily have been a pose for the cover of Vogue. She had on a purple silk night-dress with tiny straps, which fell enticingly across her breasts. Her legs were crossed so that her thigh was exposed in all its beauty. She looked regal as she rested her elbow on her knee and held her wine glass in one hand, with the other tantalisingly across her bare leg with her fingers apart as if to emphasise the power she possessed right to the tips of her fingers.

Tim stopped in his tracks. He was taken aback at the overt beauty before him. Was this her way of thanking him for the friendship he’d offered since she had been deserted by the man whose duty it was to protect her? The role Tim had taken on, reluctantly.

He had never seen her look so stunning. What was different about her today ... or was it him, seeing her for the first time as a woman. She was perfection. Her form was generously moulded, like a sculpture, a masterpiece. She was a vision of beauty. Here, in front of him, a work of art on private display for him and him alone.

After what seemed an age she spoke.

“Sit down Tim, here, next to me ... we’ve so much to talk about.”

He threw his coat onto a chair and placed himself next to her as commanded. He’d come here hoping to hear the words that would set him free from the torment of the last twenty four hours, but now his mind was focused only on the next few hours.

Nina took Tim’s hand and placed it on her bare thigh, pulling him closer. His blood was pounding around his body. He was experiencing an uncontrollable fever of emotion. It was too strong to fight.

He looked down at his hand which was cupping her bare body beneath the silk gown. Nina stretched out flat on the sofa, her eyes closed as she relaxed in his grip. He kissed her, softly at first, then more intensely until they immersed themselves in the ultimate act of love making. After they had exhausted their emotional energy they lay naked on the carpet, clutching each other tightly.

Three hours passed in what seemed like minutes. Tim suddenly recalled his words to Trudy. “Oh my god Neen, I promised to be back in half an hour, I promised I’d help the kids sort out their welcome for Mel, they’ll be going to bed by now.”

“Then you’d better go. You’ve given me everything I need for tonight. You can go now.”

“Nina, you do mean ... for good, don’t you?”

“What do you think, Tim? Wasn’t it just as fantastic for you as it was for me? Are you saying you can walk away from what we did tonight and never look back? I don’t think you can, Tim, any more than I can. We both know that there will always be something very special between us.”

“Neen, please tell me that you won’t say anything to Mel. It’ll destroy her, and me… please!”

“I don’t want to destroy you Tim, you mean too much to me for that. Go home and help the children prepare for the morning.”

“But I need you to say you won’t tell her, can’t you see it’s written on my face that I’m guilty?”

“Trust me, Tim. She kissed him softly on the lips and then, still naked, steered him to the door and home.”

The short walk back did not give him chance to sort his head ... as he walked in he was a mess of confusion and fear for what he’d done, again.

Trudy regarded him with disdain, contempt even. She must know now that he was a devious two timing monster. She was a woman after all. She addressed him via the children to avoid any verbal contact with him.

“Your father’s back kids, and just as you were about to go to bed, you can have an extra half hour to sort out the morning and then bed. I don’t want you being tired when your Mum arrives.”

He couldn’t fail to miss the way
she
had granted permission for them to stay up longer to see him. His children now needed
her
permission to see him and he needed her permission to play the role of father. How had he got to this in just a few weeks? The answer, he knew, was next door, and it was pretty obvious that Trudy knew as well.

A door slammed somewhere on the hotel landing, causing Melanie to wake with a start. The heavy curtains gave no hint of light, no indication of time, no clue as to whether it was day or night. In the room something seemed unfamiliar as she lay staring at where the door should be. It wasn’t there. Still half asleep she turned to see if it was on her other side, and it was then that her arm encountered a body. In seconds her brain recalled the sequence of events that had led to her present confusion.

She’d shared a drink with Ratty in his room as agreed. A vodka, Polish vodka, very good vodka, especially with apple juice, a common combination in Poland. She’d had a second as they talked about their work back home and the work they’d completed here, then the conversation moved to families, her family, her husband, her relationship. The apple juice ran out and so she had vodka with vodka. She revealed to Ratty the problems within her marriage. Tim’s inability to listen to her, to show affection of the kind a woman needs, kindness, caressing and understanding.

She knew Ratty understood, his strong but gentle arm around her was testimony to this. He didn’t pressure her, he simply made it possible for her to find solace in a way that was impossible with Tim. She helped herself to another vodka and relaxed into his arms. He was everything her husband was not, this was a moment in her life she refused to hurry, savouring it instead, as if it might disappear at any minute. Her head was swimming with the effects of the vodka but she knew only too well what she was agreeing to; the inevitable.

That had been hours ago. The noises emanating from around the hotel were a positive indication that people were getting up, showers were being taken and doors were slamming as guests headed for breakfast in the restaurant downstairs.

She climbed out of bed, taking only a brief look back at the still sleeping figure of her lover. She dressed quickly and carried her shoes as she silently let herself out onto the landing. Her head was still in a whirl but now was not the time for reflection, rather a hasty shower back in her room followed by a quick breakfast and then a taxi to the station.

She managed to avoid meeting Ratty at breakfast, scoffing it down in record time before racing back up to her room to get her cases. One last look from the hotel window, the lake making her heart beat faster as it had done from the very first day. She’d fallen in love with this place, the hotel, the lake, the city; she turned from the window and thought about the man she’d left sleeping in the room along the corridor... had she fallen in love with him?

She looked across the lake to the opposite bank and saw people cycling on the path at the waters edge. She searched the grass further back until she saw a spot of grass that might be the place where they had spent an evening together. This was a magical place. She would return, of that she was certain, but who with...?

She took the small case in her left hand and pulled the larger one on its wheels with her right hand using the long handle to steer it. She made it to the lift where other people were waiting. At reception she had only to hand back her key and say goodbye and thank you to the lady who had helped her several times over the past few weeks. Goodbyes said, she took a last look at the double doors which led straight into the restaurant, but there was no sign of Ratty. It was better this way. The porter opened the front doors and took her cases to the waiting taxi. This chapter of her life was over; the next one might prove more difficult.

The taxi ride to the station was done at breakneck speed in an old Mercedes which stalled at every set of traffic lights. She watched with amusement as the driver cursed it each time as if it were the first time it had happened.

She thought of Tim driving his wonderful new Mercedes for Simon Stonewood and that brought thoughts of home tumbling into her mind. She determinedly closed the door on those images, preferring not to think about home until she was back on English soil.

She had several hours on the train to Berlin, plenty of time for self explanations and recriminations. From Berlin she had a flight booked to Heathrow, from where she would get a taxi and another train home. If everything went to plan, she should be walking up the front garden path around one thirty.

Once on the train, she was forced to think about her imminent arrival. Should she ring Tim and ask him to pick her up from the station or should she get a taxi? She decided that she couldn’t face a twenty minute car journey, possibly alone with him. Not yet anyway. Better to return to a group welcome, one where everyone would try to talk at once, offering her protection from his questions, his searching eyes, looking for tell tale signs of her guilt.

Until yesterday it had been simple, there was nothing to hide – well nothing of any consequence. All right, she’d sat at the lakeside a few times with Ratty, she’d even let him touch her intimately once or twice, but on the grand scale of things she could deal with that. What happened last night was different, and what made it unforgivable, if Tim ever found out, was that she’d asked for it to happen. Yes of course she’d said no at first, but Ratty was a decent person, if she’d said no like she meant it he would have respected her wishes. She heard herself saying no, just as she had last night, except it sounded more like yes. She thought about the way she’d dealt with his moves. She practiced saying no to herself and each time she said it she knew that she’d really invited him to overrule her.

That was what she’d wanted him to do and he had obliged willingly. What had happened next was truly wonderful and she refused to tell herself that she wished she hadn’t let it go so far. She had only good memories of last night and the hardest part, she knew, would be saying no to Ratty the next time he asked. The secret was not to find herself in a situation where it was possible. The hotel room had been a perfect opportunity. A double bed, a locked room, a mini bar stocked with vodka, a man she’d spent a lot of pleasant time with already, a man who had declared his love for her although she’d repeatedly told him she would never be his.