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I hated Kate being mad at me. But I knew now. And it
was up to me to convince her of the truth.

CHAPTER 24

That night, I dreamt wild dreams. Dreams about black
lakes, dark tunnels, raging rivers. And then Kate, lying in the
brightness of the fresh snow, a puddle of dark blood oozing out
from under where she lay, her eyes wide and lifeless, flakes
sticking to her face.

I woke up screaming. My door opened.

“Abby, you okay? Are you awake?” Kate asked.

I took some deep breaths. It was just a dream. Kate
was okay. It was a dream, not a vision. I told myself to calm down.
My heart felt like running horses as she walked over to me. I
hugged her hard.

But was it only a dream? Did I even have just
regular nightmares anymore?

“Abby. You’re home. Everything’s fine.”

Then I remembered.

“Dr. Mortimer, Kate,” I said. “It’s him. I saw that
blackness tonight when we were talking to him. I didn’t imagine
it.”

She handed me the glass of water from my nightstand
and I took a sip.

“Let’s go watch some TV,” she said.

We went to the living room and found What Not To
Wear. Kate turned it on low.

“It’s not that I don’t believe you, but I know in my
gut that it’s not him. Did you actually see him do the killing in
your vision?” she asked.

I understood why she was asking that because
logically it didn’t make sense to me either. But lately my feelings
about things were dead on and I was certain about this.

“No, it doesn’t work like that,” I said. “I know
what you’re saying. But you need to stay away from him until I can
get some proof.”

I had no idea what kind of proof I would be able to
get. The killer had been very sharp, clever in his choices, in the
locations, and method. Nobody was on to him, and even if they did
start investigating there was no evidence to find him. He was a
step ahead of everybody. But not ahead of me. It’s not that I
thought I could outthink him or anything, I just hoped he would
eventually make a mistake. Killers always made mistakes, even the
smart ones, and I would be ready.

Kate sighed.

“So all you have is a feeling? I’m sorry, but that’s
just not enough.”

“No, remember, he was at the fire that night,” I
said. “And he disappeared, and a body was found the next day.
That’s something you can’t ignore.”

She was quiet and stared at the TV.

“Okay, that’s true,” she said. “But so what? A lot
of people were at the fire. Police, firefighters, people watching.
It’s still not enough. Maybe your visions have cross-wired somehow.
I just don’t understand how suddenly you think it’s Dr. Mortimer. I
think you owe him a little more than that, Abby. We both do.”

That was true and I felt bad about what I was
saying. I didn’t want him to be the killer.

“Just take it easy with all this. Don’t jump to any
crazy conclusions until we know more, that’s all I’m asking,” she
said.

Kate was right. Dr. Mortimer was a great guy who
saved lives every day. As I thought about that, a sudden wave of
guilt shot through me. How could I even think that he was capable
of killing? He was a healer, and a really good one. But I couldn’t
ignore it either. Something happened at the hospital and I needed
to find out more.

As we watched the screen, I knew it wouldn’t matter
how much I told her to stay away from him. Her emotions were
spilling out and my new sensitivity could pick up everything. She
might not talk about it, but she couldn’t hide it from me.

Kate was totally and crazily in love with Dr.
Mortimer.

CHAPTER 25

Just when I thought I was moving forward, I had
taken three steps back. Maybe there was no getting over this. Maybe
people had accidents and woke up to strange new lives they didn’t
want and for the rest of their days they wandered, lost, never
figuring out how to live again.

It had been a week since I told Kate that Dr.
Mortimer was a vicious, heartless, cold-blooded killer and I felt
terrible. And I was a little scared, too, because I knew what I had
seen. The blackness surrounding him was real.

But Kate still refused to believe it. She was sure
that my vision, or whatever it was, was wrong. She said she would
know if he were a killer, that she had good instincts about things
and Dr. Mortimer was innocent. And I wanted that to be true. I
wanted to believe it more than anything. Dr. Mortimer was our
friend. More like family, really.

Kate finally had that talk with Matt. It didn’t go
so well, she told me later. He was mad and blamed Dr. Mortimer for
ruining their relationship. He said he could see what had been
happening between them for months.

I was shocked that Matt had said that. I hadn’t even
suspected it for that long. I couldn’t really imagine Matt ever
being that angry and Kate confessed that it surprised her too. It
was a side that she had never seen before in her artist boyfriend.
She felt terrible.

They broke up and Matt abruptly disappeared from our
nightly dinners. It was strange and I really missed him. And in a
way, I kind of needed him, especially lately. Kate was rarely home
anymore.

My Thursday session with Dr. Krowe went nowhere. No
new memories came back.

And then, of course, there was Jesse, who I loved
and who didn’t love me back, who said it was too late and avoided
talking to me about that one night when we kissed under the stars.
That one stupid night when I made a fatal mistake and turned him
away, hurting him forever. I tried to settle for just a friendship,
but it wasn’t what I wanted and it was getting harder and harder to
accept that there never could be anything more.

Three steps back, maybe more. I realized that I was
completely alone in my gray world. Maybe it was true what they
whispered in the hallways after I passed by. Maybe I really was a
freak.

CHAPTER 26

I stared in shock at the list. It was posted under
glass in front of the main office. It was the list of starters for
the boys’ basketball team for the huge game next week, the game
that would determine if Bend High would get into the playoffs. And
Jesse wasn’t on it.

It was official. His snowboarding obsession had
gotten him kicked off the team. All that charm and those boyish
good looks didn’t stop the coach from throwing him off for missing
half the practices.

Even though it made sense, I was still surprised.
Jesse was their star player, and had been since he was a freshman.
He really must have pissed off the coach.

Jesse always had the attitude that he could talk his
way into or out of anything, and most of the time he was right. But
not this time. He wasn’t even listed as a sub.

Black rage flooded through me as I walked out to the
parking lot. I would have given anything to be able to play soccer
like I used to. I would have shown up to double practices, would
have run for a hundred hours a week if there was even a slight
chance of my returning to the team at full capacity. And it
wouldn’t have had anything to do with colleges and scholarships
either. It would have been about the game I loved, the smell of the
field, the fear that I had to mold into enthusiasm and poise to get
around defenders and slam the ball into the back of the net. I
loved the game with my heart and soul. There was nothing, nothing
like it.

Jesse used to have that same passion about
basketball. But since my accident, something in him had changed. He
just wasn’t the same. He was full of still waters. He wasn’t
telling me things anymore. And when I had been honest and told him
how I felt, he just walked away. He didn’t talk about Amanda. He
didn’t talk about why he was blowing off school and practically
living up at the mountain. There was something going on with him
and he had shut me out.

It was time we had a talk. The thought of sitting
down with him and forcing a conversation made my stomach ache. I
had a strong feeling that he might just say goodbye, tell me that
our friendship wasn’t working for him either and that he couldn’t
take it anymore. And if that were true, I didn’t know if I could
survive. I needed Jesse.

I pulled out my phone and wrote him a text. I told
him we needed to talk. Soon. That’s all I said.

He didn’t write back.

CHAPTER 27

I was thinking of getting a part-time job at
Starbucks or somewhere to get my mind off things and to make a
little money. I needed a change, needed to stop focusing on the
murders and Dr. Mortimer and Jesse and the future. It was late
February and time was slipping away. I hated thinking about June,
and especially after June. I had no idea what I would do.

I was surprised when Kate asked if I wanted to tag
along while she did a few interviews around town. I wasn’t sure if
she wanted to talk, but I was hoping she did because we had barely
spoken since I accused her new boyfriend of murder.

We got in her Subaru and she put on Josh Ritter. I
was hoping that she had reconsidered what I had told her about Dr.
Mortimer and that we could also talk about the investigations. It
seemed like nothing was happening. The cases were still open but
not solved.

“How’s work going?” I asked.

She looked over at me. Her new, perfect bob haircut
was blowing all over from the blasting heater. I unrolled my window
an inch for breathing purposes. Kate always put the heat up way too
high.

“Work is going okay,” she said. “Kind of in a rut.
City council meetings, editorial meetings, and chamber meetings.
Boring City lately. But next week should be good. The city is
proposing huge cuts in services, so there will be some fireworks.
Thanks for asking.

We sat in silence as we drove down Third Street. I
could tell Kate had something to say to me, and I waited patiently.
But she was quiet until we parked in front of a small, brick
building with a basketball court in front of it.

“Okay. I’m going to be honest here,” she finally
said. “I’ve been thinking about all this for a while. I know you’re
sure you saw something that night at the hospital, and I’m sure you
did. But you’re wrong if you still think the Doc is a killer.”

I stared at the trees blowing in the wind.

“I know that something very powerful is happening to
you, Abby. I get that. And I completely believe you. You know I do.
But I think all this psychic stuff that you’re experiencing is way
too new for you to think you know everything. You can’t really
think that he is the killer. I’m not going to let you do that. He’s
a good man.”

Her face was intense, her eyes wide like a boxer
ready to throw a punch. I knew I better be cautious with my
words.

“He saved your life,” she blurted out. “And frankly,
he saved mine too when he brought you back.”

I inhaled, took a moment to collect my words.

“Okay,” I said. “Okay. Maybe you’re right. Maybe I
saw and felt something I didn’t understand.”

“You did. Or at the very least, you misinterpreted
it.”

Kate sighed deeply, like she had been carrying this
heavy load for a while. I hadn’t realized how upset she was. It was
going to be hard to convince her.

“By the way, anymore theories as to what links all
the victims?” she asked. She pulled a brush from her purse and ran
it through her hair.

“No,” I said. “How about you?”

“No, not yet. It all seems so random. Two men, one
woman. A homeless man, a receptionist, and a construction worker
who likes to play with fire. Ages 26 to 60. I don’t know. I don’t
see any connection or pattern, but I feel like something is there.
Something links them. I just haven’t found it yet.”

“You will,” I said. “If anybody can find it, you
can.”

She smiled.

“I was hoping that the toxicology report would be
more helpful, but they weren’t able to identify the substance found
in the first two victims. The police are thinking it’s some new
designer drug that they had both taken.”

“What about the construction worker arsonist?” I
asked.

“His report isn’t back. Maybe they were all drug
addicts. Got a bad batch. Or didn’t pay what they owed or
something. Maybe the killer is an angry dealer settling scores and
sending messages.”

“He’s not angry,” I said. “He’s methodical.”

She nodded. “Well, keep thinking.”

“Any new messages from Matt?” I asked. Kate had
mentioned that he had been leaving long, incoherent voicemails
lately. I was worried about him and wanted him to be okay.

“No,” she said. “He’s kind of gone off the deep end
a little. Didn’t see that coming at all. It’s not like I led him on
or anything, Abby. Did he think we were going to get married or
something?”

“Maybe,” I said. It seemed that Matt had still
waters too, just like Jesse.

“Well, it was kind of odd. Ben said he saw him at
the hospital the other day. When he tried to go and talk to him, he
ran off.”

“That is kind of weird,” I said.

She looked in the mirror and put on some dark
lipstick.

“Okay. I have to go ask a couple of questions here.
You can stay in the car if you want. I’ll only be a few minutes,
and then we can go grab a coffee.”

She got out. I reclined the seat.

I knew Kate wanted to solve the murders, and
obviously she was thinking a lot about it all. But I also could
tell that she refused to look in one particular direction, that she
wasn’t even considering Dr. Mortimer as a suspect. And as time went
by, she seemed even more adamant about his innocence, refusing to
even acknowledge what I had seen in the waiting room that
night.

But I knew. I knew what I saw.

CHAPTER 28

It had been a long day of bad grades and steely girl
looks from across the classroom. I knew I had to talk to Amanda,
and had planned to. But it didn’t feel quite right yet so I decided
to wait.