A Heart Divided (14 page)

Maybe it’s time we join forces . . . Maybe you’re the answer to my prayers . . .

Nick’s words that first day they’d met trickled through Sarah’s mind. And suddenly, with Cord’s startling proposal, they seemed to take on an almost prophetic cast.

I’ve been asking the Lord for a long time now to put an end to this feud, to heal everyone’s hearts
 . . .

Heal everyone’s hearts
. . . What a beautiful, noble aspiration and one, even from that first day, Sarah immediately knew she shared with Nick. But marriage? Marriage to Nick, when her heart whispered she loved his brother?

As she stared up at Cord’s granite features, his face blurred. Dizziness engulfed her. It was too much to comprehend. Cord wanted her to marry Nick. The man she wanted was trying to give her to his brother.

Sarah swayed and would have fallen if not for the sudden support of Cord’s strong arms.

“Sarah, are you all right?”

She shook her head to clear the sparkling lights spinning before her eyes. She couldn’t faint; she just couldn’t. Mama had always said fainting was the refuge of the weak and cowardly, and she’d never shame her mother’s memory. Not for Cord Wainwright or any man!

“And since when has Nick needed you to speak for him?” she demanded, shrugging out of Cord’s grasp. “Let
him
ask me, if marriage is what he really wants.”

“It’s not that simple. He doesn’t believe you love him.”

Her mouth twisted in exasperation. “And when did love suddenly become a prerequisite? I don’t recall that ever being mentioned.”

Cord sighed. “I’m not any good at matchmaking. I-I’m sure he loves you, though.”

Her gaze narrowed. “And how do you know that? Has he told you?”

His glance couldn’t quite meet hers anymore. “Not in so many words.”

“Then in what words?”

Sarah moved closer, noting the tinge of anger in his voice and the muscle that now convulsed in his jaw. At last she’d begun to get under that cool layer of indifference. It was about time he felt some of the same pain and anger he evoked in her.

“In exactly
what
words?” she prodded.

With a low growl, Cord pulled her to him. “Don’t goad me, Sarah. You might not like what you get.”

She faced him, chin held high. “I’m not afraid of you or anything you can do to me. You can’t hurt me any more than you already have.”

“Hurt you?” His clasp tightened. “I swear I never meant to hurt you. I know I haven’t always treated you kindly. I regret that. But you confuse me every way I turn, and I don’t know what to do about it. Ever since that first day I brought you here, I haven’t had the heart . . .”

He stopped, drew in a deep breath, then released her and stepped back. “It doesn’t matter. All that’s important is that you and Nick are happy together.”

“And what about you?” She forced the question past her painfully constricted throat. “Will that make
you
happy?”

An undisguised look of yearning flashed across his face before he managed to jerk a mask of indifference over it. “Yes! Of course it’ll make me happy. I love my brother.”

But not me. Never me.

The words thrummed in her head and pounded so loudly in her heart Sarah thought Cord must surely hear them. She bit her lip until it throbbed like her pulse, the despair wrapping about her chest like steel bands. She looked down, her eyes filling with tears.

What’s the use of fighting it anymore? Thanks to the feud, everything’s become so twisted, so hopeless. Nick’s a cripple, Cord’s soul-tortured and blind to his own needs and emotions, Mama’s dead after years of futile, back-breaking labor, and Caleb and Noah verge on becoming vengeful replicas of Papa. As for me
. . .
well, it doesn’t matter.

Danny was the only one still unscathed, and she meant to keep him that way. She couldn’t depend on Papa anymore. The past weeks at the Wainwrights’ ranch had driven home the reality of his abandonment. He refused to admit his mistake and return the money, his hatred of the Wainwrights more powerful than his love for his children. It was up to her to take care of Danny now. For his sake, and his sake alone, she’d do anything.

Yes, for Danny’s sake, I’ll even marry Nick rather than Cord. Then, as wife of the Wainwright heir, I’ll hold in my hands the potential for doing a lot of good. And it’s not as if I don’t care for Nick. I do. In time, maybe that affection could flower into something deeper, like true love.

But only if Cord isn’t here
, Sarah added as the anguish of that admission threatened to sweep over and drown her
. Only if I never have to see him again. If he stayed, I’d die a little bit each day, living in the same house, seeing him. And that wouldn’t be fair to Nick. Of us all, he deserves better, far better, than that.

Sarah lifted her gaze. “If that’s what you want, I’ll marry Nick. But on one condition.”

“Name it.”

The swiftness of his response made her wince, but she stood firm in her resolve. Better to be like him. Be cold; be direct. Get it over with.

She inhaled a steadying breath. “You may not like it, but it’s the only way I’ll consider becoming a Wainwright.” She paused then resolutely forged on. “If I marry Nick, you must promise to leave here—and never come back.”

8

For a long, painful moment Cord just stared at her. Then he laughed, the sound harsh and hollow.

“Never come back, you say? Well, that suits me fine. I only wish I could oblige you right now.”

“Th-that’s fine with me too.” Sarah glared up at him. The hard glitter in his eyes made her so furious she wanted to reach up and smack him. He didn’t care, in fact he was glad he’d finally be rid of her! Hot tears warred with her anger. Before either could gain mastery, Sarah turned on her heel and stomped away.

Across the pasture she went, her seething emotions fueling her legs until she found herself running.
He doesn’t care . . . he’s glad
. . .
he wants to be rid of me
 . . .

The words, his words, mocked her in rhythm to her stride, pounding home the awful truth. What a fool she’d been. What a stupid, gullible fool!

Male voices drifting toward her from the front porch intruded on her impotent ragings. She could just make out Nick and his father sitting in the shade, and someone else standing behind them. In an effort to regain her composure, Sarah slowed to a walk. The hectic flush to her cheeks, overbright eyes, and ragged breathing, however, weren’t lost on the first man who caught her gaze.

“What’s wrong, Angel? You look like you’ve been chased home by another rogue grizzly.”

Sarah’s fury boiled over once again. “The only rogue around here is your brother! If I never share another word with him in my life, it’ll be too soon. He’s the most despicable, heartless—”

“Whoa, there. Hold on, ” Nick laughingly interrupted. “He can’t be that bad.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t be so quick to defend him,” another male voice chuckled from the shadows behind Nick. “I’ve known Cord over half my life, and I’d say Sarah’s hit the nail square on the head.”

Sarah froze, her glance narrowing in an attempt to make out the face of the man who’d just spoken. There was something familiar . . .

“Gabe? Gabe Cooper? Is that you?”

A tall, dark-blond man stepped into the sunlight, a silver star glinting on his broad chest. “Yes, Sarah. It’s me.”

He grinned, his strong white teeth a striking contrast to his sun-bronzed, ruggedly hewn face. “Sorry to be so long in getting back from Denver. Seems you and your family have been stirring up a mess of trouble since I’ve been gone.”

“Nothing more than you’d expect from the Caldwells.” Edmund Wainwright shifted in his chair. “But now that you’re back, Gabe, I expect things will finally settle down around here. At least we’ve got one of that thieving clan dead to rights.”

“Now, hold on.” Nick wheeled his chair—rather skillfully for using only one hand—to the edge of the porch. His glance riveted on something behind Sarah. “Cord’s heading back this way. Let’s wait until he gets here to discuss this.”

At the mention of Cord’s approach, Sarah tensed. There was nothing in the world she wanted more at that moment than to run away. Even more than facing Edmund Wainwright, she dreaded the prospect of dealing with his youngest son. Only her stubborn Caldwell pride kept her legs firmly planted, but the wide-eyed look of apprehension apparently wasn’t lost on Nick.

He motioned her up onto the porch. “Come, sit with me, Angel. No sense standing out in the sun when we’ve all got some talking to do.”

She quickly complied and settled herself in a wicker chair near the railing, shooting Nick a heartfelt look of gratitude. He leaned over and gave her hand a comforting pat.

“Buck up. It’ll be all right.”

A small, tentative smile touched her lips, then faded as Cord stepped onto the porch. His glance briefly met hers, then swung over the rest of the gathering until it came to rest on the sheriff. A slow grin lit his handsome features.

Sarah’s heart twisted. Even his smile, so beautiful, so devastating, could cause her pain, knowing it’d never be meant for her.

“I see you finally made it back.” Cord strode over and offered Gabe his hand. “Sorry to hear about your father, but I’m glad you’re home.”

Grasping the proffered hand, Gabe grinned in return. “I couldn’t agree more. From what I hear, you’ve been having all the fun.”

Cord’s glance skittered to Sarah and back. “Fun isn’t quite the word I would’ve used.”

“Why don’t we just forego the small talk and get down to business,” Edmund irritably demanded. “Are you going to arrest the girl or not, Gabe?”

The blond sheriff shrugged. “I don’t know. It’s Cord’s money. Do you still want to press charges, Cord?”

All eyes riveted on the dark-haired man. For a fleeting instant, a gamut of emotions played across his face. Then the familiar blank stoniness hardened his features.

He shook his head. “No. It isn’t necessary. Things have changed.”

“What do you mean ‘things have changed’?” His father rose to his feet. “The money’s still gone and she was involved in the robbery.
I
want to press charges.”

Cord studied his sire with cool regard. “Nevertheless, as Gabe said, it’s my money. And I’m the only one who can identify the woman who helped in the robbery, not you. So, if I don’t say it was Sarah, it wasn’t Sarah.”

“And you’re a softhearted fool,” Edmund muttered, anger in his eyes. “Just like you to let a pretty girl turn your head.”

“On the contrary, I think I see the reality of things quite clearly.” Cord looked to his brother. “Sarah’s agreed to marry you.”

It was Nick’s turn now to have the attention directed at him. He stared back at his brother, surprise, then growing exasperation flaring in his deep blue eyes.

He exhaled slowly, then glanced to Sarah. “Is that true, Angel? Do you want to marry me?”

She took a moment to compose herself. “Yes, if you’ll have me.”

“Blasted strangest proposal I’ve ever heard,” Edmund Wainwright groused. “And I don’t care what either of you say.
I
won’t have it, and that’s that!”

Nick calmly regarded his father. “And since when were you consulted? I’m a grown man and make my own decisions. I’ll marry who I want.”

“The girl’s nothing but a thieving little opportunist, Nicholas!” Edmund stomped over to confront his son. “She may be part of Caldwell’s plan, sent to insinuate herself into the family and destroy us from within. Why, I’m surprised she hasn’t already managed to come between you and Cord, turn brother against brother. Open your eyes, son, before it’s too late.”

“I’m not the one who needs his eyes opened.”

Cord grimaced as his brother’s glance swung back to him. He refused to acknowledge his words and, instead, turned the full force of his frustration on his father.

“It’s none of your business who Nick chooses to marry. He deserves his chance at happiness, and he’s chosen a fine woman. If you’d ever allow yourself to get past your mindless hatred for the Caldwells, you might see that. Give Sarah a chance. She’s not Jacob Caldwell. She’s not your enemy.”

“Don’t start on me, Cord,” Edmund rasped, his fists clenching at his sides. “I’ll not stand here and be lectured to by some arrogant young pup. You’ve never understood, never suffered the pain . . .”

He paused, as if suddenly realizing the presence of others around him. “We’ll talk about this later.” Edmund stalked into the house.

Gabe cleared his throat to break the silence that had descended in the wake of Edmund’s departure. He offered Nick his hand.

“Congratulations. Just my luck. I go away for a few measly weeks, and you snatch the prettiest girl in Ashton right out from under my nose. I hate to admit it, though, but I reckon the better man won.”

Nick’s gaze slammed into his brother’s. “Maybe so,” he softly replied, “but only by default.”

Cord’s reply was to stride off in the direction of the barn, leaving Gabe there with a totally mystified expression on his face. “Was it something I said?” He turned back to Nick. “What in the Sam Hill’s the matter with everyone today?”

“Just people dealing with their own demons.” Nick grinned up at the sheriff. “Don’t let it upset you. It’ll all eventually settle out.”

“I reckon so.”

Gabe glanced at Sarah, who’d been silently sitting there the whole time. Concern wrinkled his brow.

“Why the sad face, little lady? Don’t let Cord and Edmund’s personal feud get to you. Give them a chance. You’re sure to win both of them over, just like you have Nick.”

He moved to her side and, bending low, kissed her lightly on the forehead. “My congratulations to you too. I hope you’ll be very happy.”

“I-I’m sure I will,” she whispered.

Gabe eyed her curiously, then shoved his Stetson on his head. “Well, it’s time I was on my way. Nick, tell Cord I’ll keep a lookout for Jacob and his boys.” He headed for his horse.

They watched him mount and ride away before Nick broke the leaden silence. “This wasn’t the way it was supposed to turn out.”

Sarah turned tear-filled eyes to him.

“I appreciate your willingness to marry me, but I’m not fool enough to think I’m the one you really love.”

She fiercely shook her head. “It’s not like that at all. I-I care deeply for you, Nick. If you want me, I-I’d be proud to be your wife.”

It took everything in Sarah to manage a smile. Then, without warning, she burst into tears. Within a matter of seconds, she regained control and hastily swiped the moisture from her cheeks.

“I’m sorry,” she choked out. “I-I’m so s-sorry!”

The tears welled anew. She turned and ran into the house.

“Come here, girl. I want a word with you.”

At the harsh command, Sarah’s head jerked up. Edmund Wainwright stood in the library doorway, a frigid look on his face.

He motioned for her to come in. “Now, girl.”

She halted, her hand clasping the oak banister. He must have been waiting there in the library for her to finish in the kitchen and head up to bed, she realized wearily. But why now, on top of everything else that had happened today?

Her chin lifted a defiant notch. “My name’s Sarah, or Miss Caldwell, whichever you choose, but it’s not ‘girl,’” she said, struggling to control the surge of anger at his rudeness. He was, after all, Nick’s father. For his sake, she’d make every effort to keep the peace. But she’d not, not for anyone, allow herself to be treated in a demeaning manner.

Anger darkened Edmund’s features. For a moment, Sarah thought he’d fly into one of his rages. Then he relaxed.

“Sarah it is then. Now, would you please come into the library? I need to speak with you.”

She nodded and followed him into the room. He indicated the sofa.

“Please, sit down.”

Edmund settled himself in the wing chair. “We need to talk about you and Nicholas.”

Sarah arched a brow. “Oh?”

“You may have pulled the wool over everyone else’s eyes with that air of sweet innocence, but you’ve met your match in me, my dear. Your father put you up to this, didn’t he? What better way to win the ranch from the inside than by sending his beautiful daughter to seduce one of my sons? And, of course, Nicholas was your most likely target—crippled, emotionally vulnerable, and convinced no woman would ever have him.”

He rose to tower over her, a sudden chill hanging on the edge of his words. “Well, I won’t have it, do you hear me? You’re a heartless little tramp to play my Nicholas like this! And don’t think I haven’t guessed what you’ll do after you’re married, either. I know your kind. Sooner or later we’ll find you sneaking out to the barn for a passionate liaison with one or another of the hands.”