Alexia Eden (FairyTales Don't Exist) (36 page)

I put my plate on the table and sit on the couch cross legged as I turn to face her.

“What happened with you and Jax?” she asks looking worried.

“Honestly Ron, I really don’t know. I knew we were a lot closer than friends but we obviously never acted on it because of Drake, one night I let slip that Drake and I were…um…intimate.” I know I'm blushing at this point but I continue.

“He didn’t take it very well, and I knew I was in the wrong though so I accepted the way he handled it but it just went too far.” I swallow down the hurt I feel when I retell my story of that night.

“We hadn’t spoken to each other for a few days and I tried to keep my distance from Drake because I felt so guilty. I was battling to sleep and I was so unhappy because I missed Jax so much. Early that morning before
 I left I went to the kitchen to get something to drink, I walked into some girl that was leaving Jax’s room…wearing his clothes. I knew he slept with her and it broke my heart, I knew why I was feeling that way, it because I thought I loved him more than a friend Ron.” I tell her sadly.

“I knew you loved each other, I could see it, you guys just need to talk to each other and let out all these feelings that you keep hidden. I AM going to kill him though for screwing that hoe! That wasn’t cool at all.” she says getting angry.

“No Ron, he doesn’t love me like that. He was so quick to sleep with someone while I wasn’t even able to kiss Drake without feeling guilty. I told him how much I loved him, how he hurt me and broke me and he just stood there. He just stood there Ron! He didn’t say anything! I knew from that moment that I needed to end whatever was left of Jax and I.I had so much to think about , I was so conflicted. My head was telling me that I needed to stop being this shit slutty girlfriend and focus on being the girl Drake deserves. I have a lot to discuss with Drake, so much has gone on these past few weeks and I just need to get it all out in the open with him so I can figure out what we both need. These few days I’ve been away I’ve had so much to think about , especially about what I really feel for Drake and Jax, I don’t even know if its love anymore but I needed to see Drake face to face to discuss this with him so I can figure this all out. I don’t want to talk about Jax Ron and I know you want to make us all one big happy family again but…I can’t be around him. I just can’t Ron.” I say as I place all those memories of Jax back into that little black box to remain hidden for as long as humanly possible.

“I understand Lex, he just went too far this time, I get it. You’re not a slut, you are surrounded by gorgeous guys, of course you’re going crush on a few. You’re young and haven’t really experienced as much as the rest of us so now that you are doing things you usually wouldn’t do, you’re belittling yourself. You aren’t like that whore Chelsea, you’re so much better than that! You are allowed to have a little fun Lex and maybe along the way you will meet the right guy…if you haven’t already. Jax is going to regret fucking this up with you, because he missed out on someone great! I have your back girl, guess that means more time with me if you’re not going to be spending all your extra
 time with Jax now.” She teases.

“Sorry Ron, you still gotta fight Drake for my time while I'm here.” I giggle.

I hear footsteps coming up the stairs to the front porch outside. Drake appears in the door way and I run up to him and jump into his outstretched arms.

“Lex! Ah I missed you so much babe!” he says as he swings me around in his arms, I hear his deep inhale as he breaths in my scent.

“Missed you too.” I speak into his chest.

“I'm going to go and let you two catch up, don't forget our dinner tomorrow night and you both are coming – no excuses or I’ll carry you there myself.” Ronny says as she walks past me.

Drake drops his bag off in my room and then heads back into the kitchen as I'm cleaning the dishes. Its dark outside now but the evening is still pretty hot. Drake comes behind me and wraps his arms around my waist, I turn to look into his eyes and he gives me a soft kiss. I’m so nervous about talking to him and I guess deep down I’m a little afraid of what he might do or say. He promised never to  hurt me again and I believe him but there’s a little part of me that doesn’t trust him to keep his wolf from taking over. 

He lifts me up and sits me on the table and slides his large hard body between my legs. His hands are on the underside of my knees as his lips kiss down my neck before meeting my lips.

He’s pushing harder and harder against me and I can feel he wants to do more but I can’t continue this without telling him about the kiss I shared with the twins and the feelings involved. I don’t feel the intense need and sparks with Drake as I do when I’m with the twins, its just not there anymore. Maybe Talon was right after all. I pull away from him breathing hard and I rest my head on his shoulder.

“I’m going to shower, I’ll be quick I promise.” I say as I give him another quick peck and make my way to the bathroom.

After I finish showering and getting dressed, I make my way to my room to find Drake sitting on my bed with my phone in his hands. Even though I always delete any messages I get from Alex, Johnny or the twins I also have a lock code on my phone in case I let a message slip by undeleted.

I’m not sure why he’s holding my phone in his hands, and he doesn’t seem fazed that I caught him with it. “Why do you have a lock code on your phone?” he asks
 me.

“Because I do? Why do you have my phone?” I ask him snatching it from his tight grip and putting it on charge on the other side of the bed.

“Because I do?” he echoes in a cocky tone.

I figured this is the best time to spill the beans so I stand in front of him and say. “We need to talk Drake.”

“What?” he says flatly.

“We need to talk about us and what’s happening with us. I know I love you there’s no denying it but I’m not sure we should…I mean…argh.” I stumble with my words.

“Spit it out!” Drake roars.

“My head is so messed up…I’m so conflicted and I don’t know what the fuck I’m feeling anymore. You know I care about you but I also-”

“Is this about Jax? You love him too? I saw how you two were those days before you left, I’m not stupid Alexia.” Drake spits out.

“No…I mean yes, it is about him too. I do care for him and I think I do care for him more than you would a friend but that’s just it. If I was so in love with you then how can I fall for someone else when I have you?” I push my hair out of my face as I pace the room.

“You do love me Lexi, you do! I don’t care what feelings you have for Jax, you’re mine! I know you love me, I love you and you know that too!” he shouts as he stands up from the bed. I turn and watch as his chest rises and falls with his deep breaths.

“No I don’t think that’s it. Of course I love you and care for you but I’m not sure I’m in love with you. If I was in love with you then I wouldn’t of kissed-” I love up to Drake just in time for him to gasp and his eyes to widen, I cover my mouth. “Shit”

“You what?” he says in a softer voice, it’s terrifying and sounds deadly.

“Okay.” I take a deep breath and turn to face him. “I-kissed-two-guys-while-I-was-away.” I quickly blurt out when I notice his jaw clenching and his eyes darken

“That’s why I don’t think what we have is love. That’s why I wanted to talk to you , I care about you and I know I’ve hurt you and I never want to do that again. I don’t think we should be togeth-” I say as I back away from his terrifying glare.

“What!” he interrupts bitterly as he stands and stalks towards me. I keep backing away towards my window, I’m too scared to run past him as he continues to yell at me harshly.

“You fucking kissed TWO guys! What! Wasn’t one enough?” he bellows as his face reddens.

“I’m so-” I say as his fist connects my jaw and my head whips around, I lose my balance as I try to comprehend what he just did.

Drake just hit me…
I stumble and lean on the window sill, I can’t even bear to look at him but he continues to shout at me as I try to make my escape passed him.

His forearm grabs me around my waist and he brings me roughly again his chest as he continues to bark in my ear. His other hand grabs my hair and turns me so I’m looking up to his terrifying eyes.

“You think you can get away from me that easily?! You want me to walk away from you! You want it to be easy but I’m not letting you go, YOU ARE MINE, how many fucking times do I have to tell you! I’ve spent too much time on you and it’s not going to be wasted!” I continue to roughly push at his chest to get him away from me but he grabs my wrist tightly and with his other hand slaps me again.

I fall to the floor holding the cheek he just hit, shock and adrenaline running through my body.

“Drake stop! Please, just stop. Don’t do this! I’m sorry, I never meant to hurt you.”

He kicks me in my ribs hard knocking the air out, I roll over to my other side gasping for air. I know he’s not using his full force but he’s still kicking me nonetheless. He
bends down and grabs my throat, I use this as an opportunity to knee him in the stomach, he lets out a gasp and it gives me a gap. My ribs hurt with every movement but I managed to drag my body along the floor to get away from him. The tears continue to fall down my face as I think of how I thought that I loved this monster. He grabs my ankle and pulls me to him as he lands on top of me. I cry out in paid as his body collects with my ribs. He leans down to me and I have no option to look at his black menacing eyes that seem to be full of disgust.

"Was it good? Was it worth it? Do you regret acting like a whore! Tell me you regret kissing them!” he shouts as he pulls me up by my hair so my face is now inches from his. I cry out as he yanks my hair hard.

The adrenaline is slowly leaving my body, the void is being filled and I'm purely terrified of this person before me. My body is shaking as he straddles me, my weak hands grip at his large hand that is now almost tearing my hair out. “Stop Drake, just please….stop!” I cry out but he doesn’t stop.

“Tell me you regret kissing them!” he screams and I scream back with rage.

“I don’t regret it! I don’t Drake! I fucking regret telling you! I should of fucking left you the first time you hurt me!” I shout back at him watching his face pulse with anger. His hand connects my face again but he’s still holding himself back because I know he can hit me harder if he wanted to.

I close my eyes and lay there while he takes all his frustration and anger out on me, hitting and swearing at me. I know no woman ever deserves to be hit  by a man but in some weird way as his hand connects with my face, a little part of me feels that I deserve every little bit of this for acting the way I have lately. He deserves so much better. I feel liquid running down my face and I know it’s not tears…

“I should have disciplined you the first time you disrespected me then we wouldn’t be sitting in this predicament.” he bellows as he wraps his hands around my neck tightly I try grasping for air and scratching his fingers but he only gives me enough air so that I don’t pass out and I’m awake to witness and feel all his cruelty. I open my eyes slowly and I can already feel the ones bruised.

He yanks me up my hair but my body is trembling and too weak to stand up, I stumble and lose my footing but he continues to drag me towards the bed.

“You want to act like a fucking bitch! I’m going to treat you like one!” As we get closer to the bed, I start struggling against his grip when realization to what he’s going to do to me when we reach the bed hits me.

He continues to drag me as I plead for him to stop hurting me. He eventually tugs harshly at my hair throwing me onto the bed I start smacking and pushing him off but he climbs on top of me and rips my shirt off. I’m left with just my underwear, I hear him let out a growl as I continue to slap at his chest, he straddles me, tucking my bruised arms and hands under his knees. He peels off his shirt then whips his belt off in one quick motion.

“You deserve everything I’m about to do to you! I should’ve disciplined you the first time you disobeyed me, I didn’t think you would end up to be such a slut. If I knew you were going to whore yourself around I would’ve fucked Chelsea that night she came into my room! I didn’t because I loved you! I don’t know why I stopped myself though, it wasn’t like I was getting any from you!” he spat and I flinch underneath him breaking out in sobs.

I thought about channeling the power I had to hurt him but I wasn’t sure how to control it and no matter how angry I was at the moment I didn’t feel hatred for Drake, I loved him….I may not have been in love with him but I loved him more than he deserved and because of this, I could never cause him pain…even if he was so quick to inflict it on me.

He forcefully turns me over so I’m lying on my stomach as he ties his belt around my hands against the bar on top the head board.

“No Drake! Don’t do this….please don’t!” My voice is hoarse from the crying and screaming but he continues to tighten it against my wrists very tightly making me screech out in pain.

“Shut up! This is happening whether you like it or not, you need to know who you belong to! You need to learn, you are no better than a dog that needs to be disciplined when they fuck up and that’s how I’m going to treat you.” Drake growls and I know this is all his wolfs doing but I don’t care who’s in control, Drake should have been stronger, he should have been strong enough to stop his wolf from hurting me this way.