All About Me (19 page)

Instead of turning around and going back to where the fuck I came from, I clench my fists and walk towards the sauna. I just need to be sure that I didn
’
t miss the opportunity to talk to Dora about Jacob. She is going to be less confident alone. She has a sharp tongue, but I know that deep down she is insecure and wary about her appearance.

Sweat gathers on my forehead and I blink a few times, looking straight at the door. Fuck, I
’
m chickening out. This is completely out of my comfort zone. Dora could be naked in there; she might freak out and start screaming. It
’
s a good thing that no one is around to hear her all the way downstairs.

Don
’
t be a fucking moron. Just get on with it.

For the first time in my life, I listen to my reasonable side and walk through that door. The gym sauna isn
’
t particularly small, but as soon as I walk in through that fucking glass door I know that I made a mistake, because half-naked Dora is not lying on the top step; instead, it
’
s half-naked India.

My whole body freezes from head to toe and my brain stops functioning. If anyone else could see me here right now, I would be taken for some psychopath, a stalker who can
’
t get enough. Rosy cheeks, perfect pink breasts and those hips, my sweet India is lying on the first step spread out on her back, like she
’
s inviting me over to her.

Oh, sweet Jesus
.

This is way too much for me to take right now. This whole thing is like a dream, the best I ever had. Her chest rises and falls with rhythmic movements and her breasts are extraordinary. Firm, not too large and not too small. My dick goes hard in an instant and I have no idea what to do. Sweat surges through my face and I wet my lips, imagining what I could do to her. Her hair is stuck to her face and even in the steam she is glowing. My head screams to get the fuck out of here, but my body fucks my reasonable side over.

She sighs, blinking rapidly, and then opens her eyes without leaving me enough time to get the hell out of here. Her beautiful breasts are in front of me and I remember when I cherished them by licking her, while she was going wild.

“
What the fuck?
”
she asks, sitting up and covering herself with her hands. My face drops and my world starts to spin and I don
’
t know if this is from the steam or because I
’
ve just been caught.

Chapter Eighteen
 

Temptations.

Present

 
“
Listen, I
’
m here for Dora, this isn
’
t what you think,
”
I say quickly.

“
Dora? You want Dora?
”

“
No!
”
I reply quickly, mildly aware that my cock is hard like a rock and she can see it.
“
Not like that, I saw her with some girl and I thought that I could talk to her about Jacob. I didn
’
t know that she was with you.
”

She doesn
’
t respond, only continues staring at me as sweat drips over her half-naked body. The steam breaks us apart, but out of nowhere I take a step forward. She moves down so we are facing each other. Out of nowhere, just like that, we are so close that my skin prickles towards her.
 

“
Come on! What are you waiting for?
Keep staring. That
’
s why you
’
re here, so you can spy on me.
”

Then she puts her hands on her hips, exposing her perfect chest. My mouth waters and the heat immediately rushes to my boxers. I want to show her that she is wrong, that I didn
’
t come here to spy on her. So I keep my eyes fixed on hers, even as the sight of her pumps my blood with fresh desire. Long and blissful moments pass and I
’
m focused on her eyes entirely, not daring to move them down to her naked body. Her expression is wary, but underneath the layers of anger and pain, I see lust creep over her face, shocking my dick with waves of heat.

I want to touch her, feel her against my body. I don
’
t give a fuck that she sees me as her enemy, a man who only inflicts pain. She has no way of stopping me from being aware and it
’
s my last chance to make this right. Without warning, I grab her face with my hands and press my mouth over hers. I can
’
t control myself anymore
…
I intensify my kisses because I
’
m starved for her. I caress her tongue with mine, pressing her arse cheeks to my bulge. What happens next drives me absolutely insane. My lips bite hers gently and she makes that sexy moan while moving her fingers through my hair. Joy spreads through my body because I know that she is enjoying what I
’
m doing to her.

She can
’
t deny that our bodies are made for each other. The tension is long forgotten, moving away as the air around us crackles with electricity. I touch her breasts, pressing my lips over them and wanting to take her purity right here and now. My dick throbs in my pants and the world around me starts spinning. I growl with pleasure, moving my mouth over to her neck.

“
Oh, India, I
’
ve missed you so much,
”
I whisper, kissing the edge of her shoulders and then licking her hardened nipple.

Then, as if with the wave of a magic wand, she breaks away from me, breathing hard and cowering from me.

“
We are not doing this. You had your chance! It
’
s over between us. You can
’
t just barge in here like that with your chauvinist ego, when I
’
m trying to get a moment away from you,
”
she snaps, covering her breasts with her hands.

“
I
’
m sorry. I don
’
t know what got into me. You
’
re so beau
—”

“
Just shut up.
”
She scowls, and then she disappears from the sauna. I stand there barely aware of what I
’
ve just done. Every inch of my skin craves more, but yet again I
’
ve lost control. My emotions shot ahead of me. I press my back against the hot wood, feeling dizzy, and my breathing is irregular. India hasn
’
t forgotten about me completely, but she was strong enough to break the spell. She was right: I had no right to claim her like that.

When I finally get my breath back, I realise that I
’
m a mess. I run my hand through my damp hair, feeling the pressure in my chest. There is no relief. Being close to her seems like it never took place, like it never happened.

I take a deep, noisy breath and get the hell out of the sauna. The changing room swirls all around me. Minutes pass and when I get back to my own locker I curse under my breath, punching the wall. I have no idea what got into me, but she kissed me back. She pretends that she doesn
’
t love me, but we just shared the most incredible moment since the clash in the restaurant. She can
’
t deny that she doesn
’
t feel anything anymore.

Fuck, my head is screwed. I try to convince myself that India is going to forget that I
’
m being an asshole. Whatever I do, nothing seems right. I put my T-shirt back on and wonder if I can find her. On my way to the house, I realise that I have no right to chase after her. She is with Evans.

When I get home, Jacob and I get into another fight. That evening he gets drunk, then brings home two good-looking birds. I throw them out, so he goes mental and we get into an argument. Eventually he falls asleep on the sofa in the living room. During the night, thoughts are mounting in my head. I haven
’
t done anything since I recorded that video. She doesn
’
t love Evans, but she won
’
t forgive me until I talk to my own mother. Fuck me, her terms are harsh, but maybe it
’
s time to think about this. My last trip to Gargle wasn
’
t very successful and the conversation with my mother only complicated everything. It
’
s time to make a decision; it
’
s time to start fighting harder.

***

“
So what
’
s the deal with you and that chick Gretel? I thought that you had given up on her a while ago?
”
asks Malcolm, as I meet the whole team for lunch on Wednesday.

On Monday, I realised that I
’
m moving nowhere. Evans doesn
’
t give me any chance to talk to her again. I could be really fucking ignorant and ask her in front of him about what happened between us on Sunday, but I know that I
’
ll ruin everything if I do that. I just have to be patient and wait until fate brings us together again.

“
Do I look like someone who has given up?
”
I ask him, pinching my eyebrows together. I hate when my teammates assume that India and I are just history.

“
Well, she hasn
’
t forgiven you and she
’
s still going out with Russell,
”
he points out.

“
Whatever, man. I know that she
’
s going to be mine again, even if I have to move heaven and earth. Fuck, I
’
m not giving up.
”

“
Mate, you have tried everything. She
’
s pissed and won
’
t change her mind. You should have taken the money.
”

Malcolm might be right. I should have just accepted the cash, then it would have been a done deal, but I would have never forgiven myself. India has been humiliated enough. Right now I have to turn this game around.

I shove some food into my mouth, watching as she feeds Evans, laughing on the other side of the canteen. Clearly she likes to wind me up, because I don
’
t think I can keep watching this.

“
I
’
m off, see you guys at practice,
”
I say, getting up.

They shout something after me, but I don
’
t pay any more attention to what
’
s going on around me. This whole situation with India pushes my patience to the edge.

I go home and then jump into my brother
’
s car and take it to the nearest garage. After a long and painful negotiation, my mate that I
’
ve known for a while agrees to give me a good amount of cash for the car. The paperwork is straightforward, so later in the afternoon I get home with a new car, one that India has no knowledge of. The past has been cut off and I will not bring back memories of Christian.

After that, I show up at practice and do my bit. There are a few important matches ahead of us, but my head isn
’
t in the right place. I decide to keep away from India for the time being, to stop the apologies and the games. She doesn
’
t want me because I blew what we had.

The rest of the week moves at a snail
’
s pace. I get up in the morning, shower and get my arse to Uni, then practice and then straight home. This goes on for another week. Jacob is getting worse; on Sunday, I can
’
t stand him being drunk anymore. I take the car and park outside India
’
s apartment block.

I
’
m not sitting outside Dora
’
s apartment just to talk to her. I
’
m here to hammer hard in her scull that she is an idiot and she needs to get together with Jacob. Her fucked-up reason isn
’
t good enough. It
’
s a long morning. India or Evans won
’
t recognise my car, so I
’
m not stressing. I need to get my mate
’
s life back on track.