All I Want Is You (6 page)

Ryder

              I walked into my room and threw my gym clothes on the floor. It had been a crazy week and all I want to do right now is lock myself in my room and watch some Netflix on my flat screen. I took off my shirt and Nikes then walked into my bathroom and turned on the shower. I turned on my iPod that was hooked up to my Bluetooth system in my bathroom. Monster by Eminem and Rihanna came through my speakers

             
I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed

Get along with the voices inside of my head

You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath

And you think I'm crazy, yeah, you think I'm crazy

              I got into my shower and got under the water. At this moment, this song seemed like my life. With basketball and all my father’s demands, I feel like I was going crazy. I hadn’t saw my mom in a few days. I was going to look for her when I get out the shower. I washed up and got out, and grabbed some sweats from my closet. I threw on a white beater and some house shoes and sat on my bed. I saw a letter that had my name out in, so I opened it and saw it was from my mother. I was a little scared to read it.

Dear Ryder my lovely son

              I wanted to tell you that I love you very very much. I had to leave, I know I should have told you in person, but I was afraid if I saw your face I would have stayed. I couldn’t take it anymore, I am not happy with your father and he scares me. I had to get out of town as soon as possible. I am very proud to call you my son and I’m hoping one day you will come stay with me. Your father and I haven’t been in love for a while. I’m not even sure he ever really did. He was forced to marry me, I found out he been having an affair the whole time. He forceds me to have sex with him and a bunch of other things. I’m not telling you this so you will hate him I just want you to know I have my reasons why I had to get away. I met a man here in california while he was on business. We fell in love and I’ll be moving in with him in Cali. I hope you understand and don’t hate me. I love you Baby boy and I hope I hear from you soon.

                                                                                                                Love your mother

              I read the number she left at the bottom of the letter, as I sat on my bed and cried. I didn’t know if I should be mad or happy she found happiness. I did know one thing and that was that I wanted to kill my father. I got up and stormed down stairs to my father’s office sure enough he was in there.

              “How the fuck could you cheat on mom and force her to sleep with your cheating ass!” I yelled at my father, not giving a shit if I was being disrespectful or not.

              “Son, calm down, I didn’t force Linda to do anything she didn’t want to. I loved her; she carried two of my children.”

              I could just shoot him in the face because I knew he was lying. I looked down on his desk and saw a bunch of photos. He hurried and picked them up before I saw who it was.

              “So, it’s true you were cheating on mom!” I stormed out of his office and went to my room. I had no idea what to do. I needed to talk to someone, so I called Blu, I really hoped she wasn’t busy. I dialed her number still pissed the fuck off. I couldn’t believe this shit, my dad didn’t even look upset. He looked relieved, like he was happy she was gone.

              “Hey stranger long time no talk,” Blu sounded so happy.

              “Hey do you think we can meet up on the beach down the road from your house?”

              “Yes, we can. I was just about to head that way, is everything okay, Ryder? You sound off today. I’m a little worried and I haven’t heard from you in a while, and I tried calling you a couple times.”             

              “I’ve been a little busy, but I’ll talk to you when we get the beach,” I hung up the phone and put some jeans and a shirt on with my Nike sandals. I didn’t care how I looked right now, my life is falling apart slowly and I had a feeling things were about to get worst.

              I hopped in my car and drove fast as I could to the beach by Blu’s house. No one ever came over here, so it was perfect place. I parked my car and waited for her to show up. I thought about calling my mom, but I was upset with her as well for not telling me to my face. I knew their relationship wasn’t perfect, but I didn’t know my father was stepping out.

              I saw Blu pull up in her car, I got out of mine and put my hands in my pockets I was feeling broken; I really didn’t know what to do. She walked over and pulled me into a hug and I started to cry, I felt like I was doing too much of that right now.

              I pulled back and walked on the beach, as she followed. I didn’t know where to start, I looked out into the water and started thinking about my child hood before things started getting complicated.

              “Ryder what’s going on, you never cry?” She looked at me with a worried look on her face, and then sat down in the sand.

              “My mom left,” I put my face in my hands. “My dad been having an affair for years and my mom had enough so left me a note.”

              “I always thought they looked happy, but I guess looks can be deceiving.” She wrapped her arms around me.

              “They were far from perfect, but I didn’t know my mom was that unhappy. First my sister leaves now my mom. I can’t take any more surprises.” I put my hands in the sand.

              “Sometimes things happen for a reason, Ryder. I know your mom leaving may be hard right now.  Maybe it was for the best though, she has a chance to actually be happy.”

              “She did say she fell in love with someone and that they were moving in together, she moved to Cali. She wants me to join them, maybe I should. You know my dad has been forcing me to work for the cartel?”

              “See, she is happy, and she wants you to still be a part of her life. That’s why you been so busy lately? Why is he forcing you to do it though? He never been this pressed before.” She looked half angry and worried.

              “I have no idea but I feel like the secrets aren’t over yet, I have a feeling that it is just now getting started.” I looked out into the water, I wished I could just swim away.

              “I’ve been having the same feeling with my mom. She’s been on edge lately, she keeps telling me she loves me and been wanting me do a lot of stuff with her. I mean we are close but I haven’t been able to do anything without her wanting to come or dragging me somewhere.”

              “Yeah, something is definitely up, so how are you and Skie?” I smiled at her. I knew she was definitely in love.

              “She’s great, like oh my god I love her, I haven’t told her yet.  She feels that we are moving too fast, so I’m scared to tell her,” She looked at her hands.             

              “I see the way y’all look at each other, she is in love with you too. You should do something special for her and tell her. Y’all came together for a reason.”

              “She does make me happy, more than anyone I have ever dated. Like I thought I was in love with, Midnight. But he’s a joke.

              I laughed “Yeah, Midnight is something else, I have a feeling he has something to do with my father’s money going missing. I just don’t have proof yet but I will, who knows what my dad will do to him after that.”

              “I wouldn’t be surprised if it was him, Ryder. Shit, he used to always talk about coming up and taking over.” She shook her head; “I can’t believe I let him take my virginity. Like really what was I thinking?” She laughed.

              I looked at her, I liked that she could laugh about it now. That wasn’t the case before. I stood up and offered Blu my hand. She took it and I lifted her up. We started walking down the beach in silence; just looking at the waves and in our own thoughts. Something was definitely up.

Blu

              After I left Ryder, I drove to my house and parked my car. I got into the elevator and showed my key card, and was taken up to my floor. I was tired, plus I had been dancing all day. I had a very important job interview tomorrow. It was my dream job and it was right her in Florida. The only thing is that I would have to move to Palms bay and that was fine with me. I walked into the house and my mom was watching a movie. I took my shoes off and started heading to my room.

              “Honey, we have Dinner plans tomorrow,” She announced, as she got off from the couch and walked over to me. I turned around and looked at her.

              “Mom, I have my interview tomorrow and then I have a date with Skie,” I looked at her, I knew something was up, just didn’t know what it was.

              “This is very important. You can see Skie after, love. Please come, it won’t be until later and she will be able to go to your interview, then I’ll pick you up after and we can go together.”

              “Fine mom, can I go to sleep now?” I walked away. I was tired of this smothering she was doing, all of a sudden. I walked into my room and locked my door, as I took off my clothes and got into the shower. My body relaxed, as I washed my curly hair and got out. I put on some pajama shorts on and a tank top.

              I pushed a button on the wall and my TV came up from the floor. I got into my bed and got comfy. I grabbed my touch screen remote and turned on Netflix, I picked the boondocks. I loved this show. When I was about to go to sleep my phone went off and I grabbed it, It was Ryder telling me he made it home and saying thanks for being there. I smiled, I did miss my best friend; I didn’t like when we went too long without talking, it felt weird.

              I was watching my show when my phone went off again. I was starting to think I would never get any rest. I grabbed my phone and smiled.

             
Skie: I missed you today my love

              Blu: I missed you too baby

              Skie: I can’t wait for our date tomorrow

              FUCK! Now I had to  tell her that I had dinner plans with my mom, even though I really didn’t wanna go.

             
Blu: Bae please don’t be upset, but my mom is forcing me to go to dinner with her. But I can see you after.

              Skie: FINE! Your mom seems to be doing this a lot lately!

              Blu: I know baby, I’m sorry!

              Skie: I’ll see you after, goodnight and good luck at your interview.

              Blu: goodnight and thank you.

              I was beyond upset right now. I was tired of my mom doing this; I missed my girlfriend. I haven’t been in her arms for a week and it was driving me crazy. I got outta bed and went to my balcony. I sat down in my fluffy white chair and looked up at the sky. I was tired and knew I should be asleep, but my mind was racing. I ended up falling asleep on the chair outside, I got up and stretched and walked into my room and got into my bed. I had another hour before I had to get up for the day. I turned on Pandora and dozed off to sleep again.

              I woke up again, feeling a little better. I put on some yoga pants and a sports bra and put my hair into a ponytail. I grabbed my dance bag and headed out my room, I was so nervous, and didn’t  know if I would get this. If I did, I would be set and it would be the start of bigger and better things. My mom was in the kitchen cooking some pancakes and humming to music. She looked stressed out. She didn’t look as bright as she normally did.

              “Good morning, mommy.” I came up to her and gave her hug. I went to the fridge and grabbed the orange juice and a glass and sat on a stool.

              “Good morning baby, are you excited about your interview?” She looked up at me, and put a smile on her face.

              “Yes, but a little nervous too,” I pour orange juice in my glass and took a drink. She grabbed the carton and put it back into the fringe.

              “Well I know you got this, would you like some pancakes before you head out?” She started making a plate and put strawberries and whip cream. My favorite, I licked my lips and shook my head yes, ready to dig in.

              She set the plate in front of me and I smashed that food down. It was my favorite breakfast. I looked at the clock and jumped up.

              “I gotta go mama,” I gave her a hug and she wished me luck, as I ran out of the house. Once I got into my car I sped to the dance studio. I pulled up and took a deep breath and got out of my car, I walked through the doors and walked to the front desk.

              “Hi my name is Blu and I’m here to interview with Bella Johnson,” the girl at the desk looked up and smiled.

              “You’re gonna be in studio one, your back up dancers are already here. Ms. Johnson is running about fifteen minutes late. So please get changed into your costume before she gets up and do any last minute things, good luck Blu.”

              I decided to go with a pussycat dolls theme and use their moves and songs to make my routines. I was so nervous right now; Bella Johnson is known for asking people on the spot to work for her company.

              “Thank you everyone for helping me with this. Y’all are greatly appreciated!” I looked at each one of them and smiled. “Now, I was told we should get into our dance costumes, so please go change and be ready in five so we can do some stretching and warm up routine.”

              I walked into the locker room and set my bag down, I was in business mode. I cleared my mind of everything but dancing and the opportunity in front of me. I took a few deep breaths and set out my clothes. I was wearing the same outfit that Nicole off the pussycat dolls was wearing in buttons. I got everyone else the rest of the outfits from that video as well. I had a mixed CD with all the songs I’m using and combined dance moves.

              Remi walked up to me with a big smile on her face, “I’m so proud of you, Blu, for making it this far. You know how hard it is to get an interview with her?”

              “Thank you, Remi. That means a lot and thank you for offering me a chance to dance with you guys. I feel like I have a second family now, even though we haven’t been hanging out much but this shows you guys will always be there when I need you. Yes, I was so excited when I got the call back.”

              “Attention ladies!” A man in all black came into the dressing room, he was clearly gay and I loved his style.

              “Where is Blu?” He looked around then at his clipboard. I stepped up and raised my hand with a smile on my face. Remi put her hand on my back and pushed me further.

              “Well hello there, Blu. My name is James and Bella Johnson would love to speak with you before everyone else comes out to join you, so please follow me.”

              “Nice too meet you, James” I smiled and followed behind him. all my nervousness just went away and I felt confident in myself. I had to know I was going to get this.

              Bella Johnson was looking at some files at a table that was set up in the corner with a radio on it. when she heard us walk up, she stopped what she was doing and took a good look at me.

“Hello Blu, I’m Bella Johnson.” She gave a warm smile and put out her hand.

“Hello Ms. Johnson,” I took her hand and shook it and gave her a warm smile. I wasn’t expecting her to be this nice.

So I was watching you since you walked in and I loved how you took charge and told everyone what was going on. The whole late thing was a lie so I can see if you really had what it takes to be in charge of a group of dancers. They all followed your directions and you thanked them which is always nice to hear. I have a few questions to ask you before you show me what you got.”

“Okay,” I took a seat across from her and put my hands together, I was really starting to get nervous again. I had never went through this before.

“Okay, Blu first question, why do you want to be a dance choreographer?” She looked at me with an intense look like she was trying to read me.

              “Well, I think dancing is art and being able to make up a dances and teach people how to do it is important. I like to think of it like a canvas and I’m the painter and I’m drawing.”

              “I like that answer, Blu. It’s like you’re telling a story. My next question is; how long have you been dancing?”

              I laughed a little before I answered. “My mom said I’ve been dancing since my feet hit the floor. I have videos to prove it. I started dance class when I got into kindergarten. Since then I knew this is what I wanted to do, dancing is important to me; without it I don’t know who I am.”

              “I like you a lot, Blu. Now, I’m hoping your dancing matches your personality. What theme did you pick today?” She looked at me with a straight face and crossed her arms. I was jumping for joy inside.

              “I have pick the pussycat doll theme. Sexy but classy, here is a CD of there music.” I handed over the CD and she put it into the CD player.

              “Its Blu’s time to show me what you got.” She took a sip out of a water bottle that was sitting on the table.

              I ran back and got every body into format and I was in the lead; I started counting. James hit play on the CD played and the song Buttons came on by the pussycat dolls.

I'm telling you loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh)

But you keep fronting (Uh)

Saying what you going do to me (Uh huh)

But I ain't seen nothing (Uh)

I'm telling you loosen up my buttons baby (Uh huh)

But you keep fronting (Uh)

Saying what you going do to me (Uh huh)

But I ain't seen nothing (Uh)

Typical

Hardly the type I fall for

I like when the physical

Don't leave me asking for more

I'm a sexy mama (mama)

Who knows just how to get what I wanna (wanna)

What I want to do is spring this on you (on you)

Back up all of the things that I told you (told you)

              We all got into sync with each other and started moving, I felt the energy in my body pick up as I was dancing. I took moves from their music videos and added my own and it was hot. By the time the song finished I was feeling good. Bella was clapping and so was James, they both had big smiles on their faces and I still have one more dance to go.

              The song when I grow up started to play, we all started to get hype and the energy in the room was great there was no way I wasn’t getting this.

             
Boys call you sexy (What's up, sexy)

And you don't care what they say

See, every time you turn around

They scream your name

              Now I've got a confession

When I was young I wanted attention

And I promised myself that I'd do anything

Anything at all for them to notice me

              Once again we killed it and I couldn’t have been happier with the way things were turning out. If I didn’t get this, I would be crushed. I wished Skie was here to see me in this moment. I couldn’t wait to see her tonight. Ms. Johnson was writing some notes down on the paper and my crew went to the locker rooms to change and get ready to leave. I was about to do the same thing, but James stopped me.

              Bella stood up and walked over to me, she gave me a warm smile and handed me a piece of paper and walked out the room. I watched as James followed, I looked at the paper in my hand I was scared to open it. I couldn’t take it anymore, I flipped open the paper and tears came rolling down my eyes

             
Blu,

              What a lovely performance you put on, I would love to offer you a full time position at my company. James will get into contact with you when you start. You are a beautiful person and a fantastic dancer with great energy. See you soon and congratulations!

                                                                                                                Bella Johnson

My dream just came true, and I slid on the floor and couldn’t move ;I was in shock. I was so damn happy right now, and nothing could mess up my mood. I got off the floor and ran to the locker room to shower and get changed for this dinner I had with my mother. I walked over to where I put my stuff, when Remi walked over with her things ready to head out.

              “So? What happened? Did you get it?” She was jumping up and down with a smile on her face.

“Yes, “ I yelled in excitement and we gave each other a big hug. Everyone else came over and we were wilding out.

              Everyone gave me their congratulations and I told everyone thank you. I hopped in the shower washed up. I put on a red dress and some flats, let my hair down and took out my phone to text Skie.

             
Blu: Baby I got it!