Back to You (39 page)

“Fergus hasn’t done anything. And he doesn’t tell them anything,” he blurts. “Come on, stop worrying.” he sighs. “You can’t expect Locke to spend every minute of his free time, what little he has, here with you at work.”

“This has nothing to do with me, it’s about Locke!” I reply, keeping my cool.

“Let Fergus take care of him,” he says without thinking twice. He immediately regrets his words.

“So Fergus has taken him?”

Tyler looks at me, biting his lower lip nervously.

“What have you heard?”

“Locke spoke to me about it. Yesterday.”

He laughs.

“Yesterday? Locke told me about the strange episodes involving other kids on the reserve, including Dora, Fergus’ girlfriend. I don’t understand how he manages to petrify them, isolate them. Then change them. But Locke is terrified that it’s going to happen to him too.”

“Fergus is in charge of the
special
youngsters on the reserve, the ones that have, shall we say, unique characteristics. His task is to show them the way. He’s working wonders with these kids, and now with Locke. But he doesn’t’ understand because he doesn’t know yet. Fergus is essential for keeping them in check.”

“Like you keep him in check, from what I saw at Scott’s house.”

“He can go a bit far at times, I admit that. But sometimes his wheels start turning and there’s no going back, it’s too late.”

“What wheels? Too late for what?” Is he brainwashing him? I’ve heard about that sort of thing. And I can tell you what I think about it, Myco.”.

“No, it’s nothing to do with hypnosis and brainwashing, but about heritage and a bond with our nation,” Tyler cries.

“Easy for you to say, you’re not the victim of brainwashing! Whose fault is it, if it’s nothing to do with your beloved brother Fergus?”

“Locke can’t go to college because he will become an adult soon, and only then can he be what nature has dictated, something that can’t happen during adolescence. He is next. The time has come.”

“Come on, be serious!” I try to be ironic. “Don’t tell me you believe all those legends that Scott goes on about. The ones he’d tell us at camp before we went to sleep or when he was fishing with Jeff.”

He looks at me, pure venom in his eyes, as if my sun had just been eclipsed. I move nearer to him, somehow bolder now.

“You know much more than you’re letting on. So tell me, Tyler, just how are things there on the coast?”

“Fine.”

“You said you came to live with Scott because he asked you to. Can’t you make up a better story?”

He grins, but it seems more like a sneer.

“That’s the truth, Ella May.”

“But I noticed that Vuk seemed to know you the night of my party and the second time he played at the bar. And so did Donn.”

“You haven’t told me everything either. I thought I was your friend.”

“I thought I had to hide things from you. I didn’t realize that you already knew
that thing
that I couldn’t tell anyone,” I confess.

“You could’ve tried to confide in me!”

“I didn’t think you’d understand. I figured if I told you the truth, you’d get me locked up in the loony bin!”

A dark cloud crosses his face.

“You thought that of me?” he spits, disgusted.

I suddenly feel a wave of remorse and go to him with open arms.

“No,” I whisper. “It was just a possibility.”

I pause to get my breath back and to gather my courage. As I’m holding him tight, I suddenly stop breathing for an instant. “Tyler, you’re a son of one of the
original thirteen
, aren’t you?

He can barely stifle a laugh. I can feel his chest vibrate. I let go of him, take a step back and look at him searchingly, waiting.

“That’s what the legend says,” he replies warily. “But now let’s get back to what we were talking about. You haven’t told me a thing. How can I protect you if you don’t tell me what’s going on?”

“Yeah, well …” I mutter. “I will tell you … when you tell me all there is to know about you!”

“Sounds fair enough,” he says.

“The whole truth?”

“I promise. But you have to work it out for yourself.” He lets out a deep breath that he had been holding in. “I’m not allowed to tell you anything, you see.”

“Why?”

“I want to explain.” He cuts off, his mouth dropping open. “But I can’t.” His tone is irate, shutters seem to have closed over his eyes. “You don’t know how much I wanna tell you everything,” he adds, listlessly.

“What’s wrong?”

But he’s betraying no emotions now.

“I can’t talk to anyone about things, apart from the members of the clan council,” he says, as is reciting words learnt by heart. His face is an inch from mine and I can feel his warm breath.

I sigh, dejected.

“Listen, Stella, have you ever had to keep a secret that you couldn’t tell anyone? Not even Jeff, Scott, your mom? Something you wouldn’t tell me, not even now?”

My thoughts immediately turn to Vuk, Jason, and Donn. I hope I don’t look in any way guilty. I don’t answer the question, but I know that he would take this as confirmation. He’s making an effort to find the right words to say.

“Can you understand that I could be… in the same situation? There are secrets that cannot be told for any reason whatsoever.”

I nod. There’s no doubt about that. I am the custodian of a whole range of secrets and I take my job of protecting them seriously. But Tyler seems to know all about them. I still don’t get how he fits into the picture with Donn and Vuk, a vampire and a werewolf. What bizarre link is he in the chain?

“I’m sorry, Stella, but I can’t tell you anything,” he continues. “Sometimes loyalty can be a burden, that’s a fact. But if you were to guess … that would resolve the
dilemma
.”

Whatever he’s aiming at, it’s making him breathless. I blink my eyes, trying to put the pieces in some kind of order.

“You want me to guess what exactly?”

“What my
secret
is, it’s the only way to get around the veto. I know you can do it. My hands are tied, and you can’t imagine how.”

“And there’s no way you can free yourself of all this?”

He shakes his head.

“No. But maybe I’ve understood how I can help you.”

“Help me?” I ask, trying not to lose the flow of thoughts.

“Yeah,” he says. “I’ll give you a few clues because, really, you already know
everything
…”

He looks exasperated at my perplexed expression.

“And that is what’s driving me crazy.”

“Oh.” I am more confused than ever.

“You can do it, Stella. You know the answer
. It’s been a while now, but try to remember
. It would really help move things along if you managed to realize a few things by yourself. Go on, make an effort.”

He smiles, his eyes trying to communicate the words his mouth cannot. The intensity of his golden gaze sends shivers down my spine.

“I’ll try,” I whisper feebly.

“I need you to understand. I won’t lose you, Ella May. Not over this.” He takes a deep breath, but utters no other words.

The conversation we just had seems to make no sense, it’s hidden meaning torments me the rest of the evening and the entire night. I can’t put the pieces in place. Doubt takes the place of anxiety, I feel as if my head is about to explode. The whole world is spinning. Only problem is, my world seems to be spinning in the opposite direction.

The Wolf Family

Monday morning, as
I drive to college and then sit absentmindedly in class, I go over my conversation with Tyler. I have this lump in my throat that risks suffocating me. What was said has only given rise to new questions, instead of providing answers. I grope around in the dark, the wheels in my head spinning faster than a clock gone wild. I feel a vague sense of guilt, but I am making an effort, as he asked, to understand. Hopefully he’ll realize this and will, to some extent, forgive me.

For the first time in God knows how long, I had an ordinary dream … a normal one. Or almost. I was wading through old memories; a makeshift tent, hearing the legend of golden cats in the icy storms of Siberia warming themselves before a fire, my mother’s face, clutching a small blue flower in my hand, a
bella di notte
or Four-O’clock flower as it is known here it the States, in a suit pocket. A flash of emerald light on the darkened stage of the bar. The latter gives me some comfort, now that I’m trying to concentrate on the banalities of normal, everyday life. If I ever had a normal life, that is …

I don’t see Vuk waiting for me in the car lot, nor in his usual seat at the back of the class. I wonder where he is today. And, especially, what he’s up to. That’s what really gets me thinking.

When I go into sociology class, Jamie is sitting in the back row, so bored out of her mind she’s practically falling asleep. Reluctantly, I sit down next to her, resigned to my fate and wanting to get it over with as quickly as possible.

“Hi Jamie,” I say, as casually as my limited acting skills allow. “How did the rest of your evening go?”

She eyeballs me suspiciously. Is she still pissed at me? Or maybe she just doesn’t have the patience to talk to a friend who has problems walking straight.

“It went great,” she says, and turns back to her notes.

“Good,” I murmur. Never mind cold, she turned me to ice!

The rest of the morning drags on. I can’t wait to see Vuk at lunchtime. I try to concentrate on what the lecturer is saying, but not even literature manages to grab my full attention. Only the fourth hour, with professor Columbus, seems to pass in a flash.

I look around impatiently as I walk into the cafeteria with Jamie. But today I don’t see Vuk in the seat next to mine, in front of a tray in which he always leaves the vegetable side dish untouched.

Jamie takes her usual place, letting her bag slip to the floor. Neither of us speak, the silence is unnerving. I bypass the invisible confine causing the unnatural hush and turn to her.

“Hey, Jamie?”

“What is it, Stella?”

I nibble at a cereal bar.

“Are you gonna’ tell me how it went with Bryan?”

Her face softens at the magic word.

“Sure,” she smiles.

She launches into a detailed description of the second part of that Saturday night.

“So you had a ball!” I force enthusiasm as my eyes wander round the room, seeking Vuk.

“Did you hear me, Stella?” asks Jamie, annoyed at my lack of concentration.

“I’m sorry, no, I missed that.”

“Bryan kissed me! Can you believe it?”

I smile with gusto.

“That’s amazing, Jamie!”

At this point I can afford to pay attention to what she is saying. Tess is in line, and a glance at the entrance tells me that the other four – Seth, Amber, Eliot, and Josh – are all here, but he is not. Did he stay in Wolfeboro today? My spirits crash.

“What did you get up to on Saturday. I mean, when you left,” continues Jamie, disappointed that I’m not begging her to reveal the minute details of the kiss. I shake my head to bring me back to the present.

“Nothing in particular. I just took a walk to get some fresh air.”

“Didn’t Donn Brooks show up when you were outside?”

I hear the seat next to me being pulled out and the sound of Tess shoving her books roughly into her bag.

I can’t think what to reply. I wouldn’t know what to say to her about the strange tale of Mr. Brooks and myself.

“Hey, girls! Already here?” asks Tess, trying to get a drift of what we were talking about as she begins poking at her plate of vegetarian food.

We both greet her with a smile. Jamie then turns back to me, intent on giving me the third degree. What the hell am I supposed to tell her? She rattles off a series of questions about my heroic Saturday night savior.

“Answer!” she orders, without even waiting from me to swallow the bite of cereal bar crammed into my mouth.

“What do you want to know exactly?”

“Exactly? What happened on Saturday night?”

“He took me to the coast and we stopped off at one of those observation points overlooking the ocean. Then he took me home,” I explain, nonchalantly, trying my hardest not to betray the slightest emotion.

“How did he manage to persuade you to go?”

“He had a driver. Donn drives like a madman!” I hope he’s listening in, even though I know that’s practically impossible.

“Was it a date? Did you arrange to meet?” I didn’t think of that. “No, I was surprised to see him there.”

She purses her lips, disappointed. My tone tells her I’m not making it up. “But he brought you to the coast.”

“Yes, but that was a surprise too. Actually, we only stopped so that I could take a call from my mom.”

“So will you be going out again?”

“He offered me a ride into the city on Wednesday because he’s convinced I need to get to know the real Donn. Does that count as a date?”

“Uh, yep,” she nods.

“Then yes.”

“Jesus Christ!” She almost yelps the words. “Donn Brooks!”

“I know.” Though I’m not quite sure if a date with Donn means Jesus is blessing me or otherwise.

“Hold up,” she says, actually holding up a hand. “Did he kiss you?”

“Yes,” I blush. “But it’s not what you think.”

Again, she seems disappointed. I’m not though.

“Do you think that on Wednesday?” She raises an eyebrow, a mischievous grin on her lips.

“I seriously doubt it.” I squirm with embarrassment.

“What did you guys talk about?” She’s digging for as much information as possible. Tess is listening in, but too occupied with her food to join in.

“I don’t know, Jamie, a lot of things.” I try to brush this question off. “We talked about his past for a bit.”

“Come on, Stella,” she implores. “Give us the juicy details.”

“Well, you should have seen the driver, he looked like a gravedigger! He didn’t even bother to look at me.” I really hope he is listening in!

“That’s a bad sign. I don’t know how you can be alone with him,” Jamie says incredulously.

“Why?!” I’m kinda taken aback by this, but I think she misinterprets my reaction.

“Well… I’d be so in awe of him, I wouldn’t know what to say, how to behave.”

My eyes roll skywards, as I think about that evening, when Donn hit me with the irresistible force of his gaze.

“To tell the truth, I have some problems keeping my head when he’s around… but he does try to put me at ease.”

“How sweet of him!”

“Very.”

“That means he likes you.”

“I think he does, but it’s not easy to tell with him.”

“Why?” asks, Jamie, curious.

“He’s always so hard to read,” I say for the benefit of Donn.

“Yeah, but he’s so freaking gorgeous!” She shrugs, as if that excuses any other defect he may have. Maybe for her it does.

“There’s so much more to him than that,” I add.

“Like what?” Jamie’s curiosity is fit to burst.

I wish I hadn’t started this whole conversation. As much as I wished Donn had been joking when he said he could read my mind.

“I’m not sure how to explain it, but underneath the façade, he’s even more incredible.” The bad vampire who wants t be good, who goes around saving my life so as not to feel like the monster… that he is? My gaze wanders to the window, to the bright light shining in through the fast moving clouds.

“Really?” she giggles.

“No doubt about it.” I hope this is the end of the interrogation.

“So… you like him?” She has no intention of giving in so easily.

“Yep.” Curt.

“How much?” She’s digging so deep, she’s beginning to seem like a gravedigger too!

“Too much,” I whisper. “More than I should.” I blush, hoping he can’t pick up on this detail, even if he is listening in. “But I don’t think I can do anything about it.” The words are tumbling out before I can stop to think.

Tess notices me squirming, and with a barely perceptible wink of an eye, she begins asking Jamie questions about her weekend. Not a bad diversion tactic at all! Thanks, Tess.

But maybe this explains why I go out with Jamie more than Tess, who I actually like better, truth be told. Tess is too instinctive, I can’t hide anything from her. But she’s easy to be around; she’s chilled out and talking to her doesn’t involve wasting time in pointless chit-chat. Jamie doesn’t get a chance to bring the subject of Donn up again for the rest of the lunch break, thanks to Eliot and Josh joining us at the table.

As we eat, I let my mind drift to what is going on in my life. A series of images flash through my mind, some clearer than others. But each of them is of vital importance and stamped on my memory for life. And I know where the difference lies, and it bother me. The clearest images are those that involve not only Jason but also Donn.

Seth and Amber join us at the table, then along come Mark and Jonathan. I turn to them.

“You enjoy your weekend, Stella?” asks Seth curiously. Or rather considerately, as if he actually cares. He must already know the details about my recovery, thanks to Ronald who played golf with Jeff at the weekend. Everyone except Jamie turn to me, awaiting my reply.

“I went to Boston with Jamie on Saturday night to see Bryan Austin, a friend who used to work in Jeff’s bar. I spent most of Sunday at The Pats.”

Everyone’s eyes flick from Jamie to me. Jamie seems pissed. Maybe she didn’t want everyone to know that we’d been out together, or maybe she just wants to be the one to tell the tale of our evening out.

“What bar was it?” asks Eliot.

“Rise,” I reply, throwing a furtive glance at Jamie. “The one on Stuart Street,” I add, smiling at him. Maybe I could make up for some of the damage done during my weeks as one of the walking dead.

“I heard you had a ball. That so?” Seth plans to keep this conversation in full swing.

“Stella had to leave early, she was so out of it,” cuts in Jamie, a spiteful smile on her face.

I nod, and try to cover my embarrassment. “Yep, she sure knows how to show a girl a good time!”

Amber laughs out loud, and discussion about my weekend seems to come to a close. Josh and Eliot discuss the weekend games, paying no further attention to the girls. Seth talks about his climbing excursions to Mark, Jonathan and me. Tess begins to tell Jamie about having started to research the giant cougars she’s sure she saw. The rest of the table begins to pay

attention.

“Seth and I really did see them!” Her voice is almost pleading, and her eyes flicker almost imperceptibly to me. Jamie’s expression speaks volumes; she’s not about to give her the benefit of the doubt. Even Amber, despite being the ‘new girl’, isn’t taking her seriously.

Tess looks at me, but not with the usual ‘I’m talking to a zombie’ look. She seems troubled, and I can’t work out why. Is she looking for back-up?

“Actually, she’s right,” I cut in impatiently. “Four hikers were in the bar at the weekend and they said they’d seen the cougars too. Huge, golden, big as bears, in the Green Mountains forests.”

Everyone is silent for a moment, all eyes turned to me. Eliot’s mouth is wide open, as if he had just seen a ghost.

“Really?”

“Yeah, one said he’s seen a giant cougar on the Baker Peak path, bigger than a grizzly. Another two guys mentioned a pack of four giant cougars.”

“Oh yeah?” asks Josh skeptically.

“Oh,” exclaims Jamie stiffly. She turns to Amber, a perplexed expression on her face, and changes the subject. Everyone goes back to talking about their own business except for Tess and me.

“Thanks for speaking up there,” Tess smiles weakly.

“Sorry?”

“Thanks for taking my side, for defending me,” she whispers out of the earshot of the rest of the gang.

“Are you kidding?” I ask. It’s the least I could do, especially after she proved to be one of the few people ready to forgive my moment of madness.

“Anyway,” she continues. “Are you feeling better now?”

“Not really,” I confess. “A bit maybe.”

“Well I’m glad you’re back with us again. I’m sorry you ran off from the bar on Saturday night.”

I shrug. I’d really rather put the whole evening behind me.

“I guess I’m too much of a wimp,” I reply, an apologetic smile painted on my face.

“We should arrange a quieter night out,” she adds. “Next week, maybe?”

Again, I’m totally flabbergasted, speechless.

“Something that won’t knock you out,” she continues, a hint of sarcasm still tangible.

“Sounds like a plan.”

“Maybe we could go to the South Boston shopping mall? Come on, let’s have an afternoon together.” Jamie eagerly awaits my reply, her friendliest smile shines on her face.