Baggage & Buttons (33 page)

‘Sensitive, though best I don’t complain to Gabe, he
had a giant Q-tip shoved up his penis this morning for me.’

‘Shit no wonder the poor guy needed a rest. So what’s
the verdict?’

‘We’ll find out in a couple of days. Will you come and
help me find a skirt and tie for Friday night?’

‘We’ve no makeup on.’

‘So?’

‘I hate being seen with no makeup on.’

‘You look lovely with no makeup on, not half as scary.
Come on, I thought you needed some red hair dye too.’

‘If we see anyone we know, I’ll kill you.’

‘Yeah yeah yeah, heard it all before,’ I smiled, then
reached for my phone as I felt it vibrate in my pocket. It was the doctors
surgery, so I held my finger up to Lexi and answered it. The doctor had the
results of the blood tests he’d run after my pelvic exam and low blood pressure
last week. I was pleased to hear that there was nothing abnormal other than low
electrolyte levels, so the doctor suggested drinking more fluid to avoid
dehydration and they’d check my blood pressure again next time I was in, unless
I had anymore fainting episodes and I was to return straight away.

‘Ok?’ asked Lexi.

‘I’m fine, just been told to keep my hydration levels
up, nothing untoward with the rest of my bloods.’

‘That’s good news, bet Gabe will love saying told you
so when he hears you need to drink more water.’

‘Great like he’s not got an issue with alcohol as it
is. Well I didn’t tell him about my blood pressure or the tests anyway, so he
doesn’t need to know. I’ll just make sure I drink more fluids. Come on let’s
get shopping.’

I ended up getting a grey tie and a really tiny grey pleated
mini skirt, one that showed my butt cheeks, then I dragged Lexi in and out of
the shops trying to find a present for Gabe, for having endured the test that
morning.

‘Christ Lexi, it’s so hard to buy something for a guy
who obviously has money.’

‘So do something for him, like you did the other night
with the outfit under your mac. That sort of stuff will drive him crazy.’

‘You’re right, he seems to love my body and loves it
when I do things just to turn him on. You know what, there is this one thing
I’ve really been wanting to try.’

‘Do I want to hear it?’ she asked with a worried frown.

‘I miss my dancing. I’d like to take some stripping
lessons, you know burlesque sort of stuff so I could do that for him. Would you
come?’

‘Not sure it’s my thing, I’d just be all arms and
legs. Plus no tits or arse to shake,’ she shrugged.’

‘Not all guys like curves Lex.’

‘I know, it’s just I’m not the “sexy” seduction type
of girl.’

‘Well you only have one night stands, probably no need
to tease and tantalise is there?’

‘Nope, get it out, get on it and kick him out when I’m
done, unless he’s seriously good and I keep him for breakfast.’

‘Now that gives me a whole new visual when I think of breakfast
Sausage McMuffins,’ I giggled. Lexi just grinned at me. ‘Anyway, I wonder if
there’s a strip club in the city? I bet they’d do lessons.’

‘I’m surfing as we speak … give me a minute … yes
here’s one, Peppers. Let’s give them a ring later and ask for you. What? Why
are you looking at me like that?’

‘I want to go, we could go and watch a performance and
ask while we’re there,’ I said all excitedly.

‘Seriously, you want to watch women stripping? You’re
not turning gay on my arse are you?’

‘Noooo. It’s all very well learning moves Lex, but I
want to see them in real life too.’

‘Do they let women into strip clubs?’

‘Well they’re missing out on the lesbian market if
they don’t, besides wouldn’t that be like gender discrimination or something?’

‘O my god you’re really serious about going.’ She stopped
walking and looked at me astonished.

‘Yes.’

‘When?’

‘Let’s go tonight.’

‘But it’s pizza, movies and
whole
tub of Ben &
Jerrys night,’ she moaned.

‘Ok, Thursday night then. I’m out with Milo until
about eight or nine, we could go then. It’s not like we’ve anything better to
do is it?’

‘Fine, but you’re putting tips in their G-strings. I’m
not touching anything.’

‘I won’t be either, I’m just curious. If I do
something like that for Gabe, I want it to be as realistic as possible.’

‘I think we need to postpone our Kill Bill marathon
then and get you in the mood. How about Striptease and Powder Blue?’

‘Excellent.’

Back at home we ordered our pizza and ice cream and I
got a bottle of beer out of the fridge for me and a coke for Lexi and we
settled into watch Striptease first.

‘You have to admit Demi’s body’s hot in this,’ I said
swigging my beer.

‘I agree, she rocks. If she knocked on my door I might
try swinging the other way for the night.’

‘Who else would you swing for Lex? Top three. You’ve got
Demi as one, who’d be your other two?’

‘Well already told you that you’d be my number one if
I went that way, so my third would probably be Beyoncé, she’s got pretty sexy
curves as well. How about you?’

‘Eva Mendes has to be number one. She’s stunning, has
amazing lips and her bottom’s awesome. I’d go for Ashley Green as number two,
then number three ... Who would be number three …?’

‘You could reciprocate and say me,’ she said, looking
hurt.

‘You’re too bloody skinny Lexi and I think you’d be
the butch lesbian if we were a couple and I don’t do butch.’

‘I don’t do women, so don’t worry I won’t be jumping
you any time soon,’ she bristled.

‘Ok, third one ... Got it, Natalie Portman, she’s
beautiful.’

‘God yes, her eyes and lashes are amazing.’

‘Have you ever heard of a top two list Lex?’

‘What’s a top two list? You don’t do top two lists,
it’s always a top three.’

‘Thank you. I asked Gabe for his top three and he
could only come up with two and I argued that there’s no such thing as a top
two list.’

‘You asked Gabe for his top three gay list?’ she
exclaimed. ‘How did that go down?’

‘No,’ I laughed. ‘His top three famous people list.’

‘And he could only come up with two? Who?’

‘Emilia Thorne and Nina Dobrev.’

‘Every man loves Emilia since she’s been on Game of
Thrones. Let me guess yours. Gabriel Macht, Jensen Ackles and Jared Padalecki.’

‘Close, Jared would be number four tied with Vin and
Ian Somerhalder, it’s too hard to choose between them for fourth place. I can’t
believe you got that wrong. How long have you known me? It’s Gabriel “sexy suit
and smile” Macht, Stephen “
amazing
body” Amell of course, then Jensen
“too cute” Ackles. Let me guess yours. Johnny Depp, Ian Somerhalder and of
course our Bradders.’

‘See you know me so well, I’m a crap best friend,’ she
sighed.

‘I still don’t get why the Coop is on your list
though. He’s blond and clean cut, so not your type.’

‘Sometimes I like to go against the grain, it’s more
fun. Great the door just buzzed, food’s here.’

We had a medium pizza each and shared a portion of
wedges and I grabbed two spoons and Lexi polished off her entire Chunky Monkey.
I could only make it half way down my Vermonster, my stomach was retaliating. I
made a hot water bottle and curled back up in the recliner as we watched Powder
Blue.

‘I loved Jessica Biel in Blade Trinity, she was pretty
toned in that, but still feminine and kicked some serious ass. I also like
Lyndsey Fonseca and Maggie Q in Nikita. I like women with a bit of power,’ I
stated.

‘Do I need to lock my bedroom door tonight?’ she
asked, flashing me a concerned glance. ‘You’ve gone all woman crazy today.’

‘No. I’m just trying to think of sexy women and what
gives them that edge. Anything I can exploit to help me keep his interest.’

‘Christ, warn me when this striptease is going down
and I’ll book into the Premier Inn and you can pay for my all you can eat
breakfast. You’ll be at it all bloody night.’

‘Don’t worry, I’ll do it at his, more room to move.
Right I’m heading off to bed. Are you staying up?’

‘Yes I need a serious dose of male testosterone after
all that girly action. I’m going to watch Fight Club again.’

‘Have fun Lex, see you in the morning.’

‘I find you trying to sneak into my bed tonight for
some rug munching, our friendship’s off,’ she warned. I threw a cushion at her
head and skipped out before she had a chance to fling it back.

It was nearly ten thirty when I got into bed. I looked
around and the room felt cold and empty and I realised that the thing missing
was Gabe. I checked my phone, no message, so I sent him a text.

Hope you had fun with Doug & Milo? My bed feels
empty without you M xx

It started vibrating before I had a chance to put it
back on its dock. I looked and saw it was a facetime call from him, so I
accepted.

‘Hi baby you ok?’ he smiled.

‘Where are you? You look naked.’ I quickly scanned the
background, hoping he wasn’t somewhere he shouldn’t be and sighed with relief
when I saw the grey paint.

‘At home. I just got out of the shower after a swim and
was heading to bed to try and get some sleep. I’m knackered.’

‘You look very sexy with your wet hair and pecs.’

‘You look very sexy with your bare shoulder peeking
out of the duvet. How was your appointment?’

‘Facial was fab, wax was a bit painful. How’s your
poor penis now?’

‘It hurts to pee,’ he said with a frown. ‘So I’m knocking
back lots of water hoping it’ll help.’

‘Do you think it will hurt if you come?’

‘Where’s this conversation going?’ he asked with a
raised eyebrow.

‘I thought you could teach me how to do phone sex and I
could help you out.’

‘That’s really sweet baby, but I think I’d prefer not
to try until I can at least pee without hurting first. Would you like me to
help you out over the phone?’

‘No I’m good,’ I sighed. ‘I was only suggesting it for
you. Can we try it when we’re both feeling better?’

‘We can try anything you want when we’re both feeling
better. Hang on I’m going to ditch the towel and get into bed.’

‘Do you think you can sleep tonight?’ I asked,
wondering how I would when I had the image of him freshly showered and naked
running through my mind.

‘I don’t know. I lie down and my head starts racing
and I miss not holding you, listening to you snore and chatter.’

‘You make it sound like I’ve got a real snoring
problem. Will you record me one night? I want to hear what I sound like.’

‘Adorable,’ he said with a big smile.

‘Do you have unlimited broadband and data?’

‘Yes, why?’

‘So do I, we could keep the call going tonight and I
could put it next to me on my pillow and it would be just like you were here
with me.’

‘Or I could just drive over and physically be there with
you Mia.’

‘That would be crazy.’

‘No what’s crazy is me lying here tossing and turning
all night and then coming to you in the morning. I could be there in under twenty
minutes, wake up with you in the morning, then go for our run.’ I chewed on my
lip as I looked at his hopeful face and he sighed. ‘Baby, go to sleep and I’ll
see you in the morning at ten. Night.’

‘Night Gabe.’ I blew him a kiss and ended the call and
lay looking up at the ceiling. I felt the tears welling up in my eyes again, what
was wrong with me? I was so damn emotional at the moment. The thought of him
unable to sleep, and me lying here missing him, was too much. I took a deep
breath and sent him a text.

Gabe could you really be here that soon? I miss you,
one night was enough time apart x

I wondered how mad he’d be with me. It was like I was
ordering take out whenever I fancied it and he deserved better than that. I
felt my phone vibrate and read his message.

Bootyless call accepted :-) See you shortly G xx

I had kisses on my texts again, I’d made him happy,
not mad. I sat up in bed waiting and watching the time tick by, so slowly, on
my phone. It felt like my first date with him all over again. I was so excited
at the thought of seeing him, touching him, kissing him and even just falling
asleep with him. I was out of bed in an instant when I heard the buzzer go,
threw on my dressing gown and opened the front door. I leaned over the
bannister to watch him race up the stairs two at a time. As he reached the
landing and saw me waiting, his face broke into one of his happy smiles and I
ran into arms and held him tightly.

‘I’m so sorry. I thought I needed space, but one night
apart from you was enough to tell me I don’t. I’ve missed you so much.’