Bastard (25 page)

“Well if you are in fact her boyfriend, why the hell are you honking your horn? If you were a gentleman, which it’s quite obvious you’re not, why aren’t you getting out of the car to get her like she deserves?” I snap.

“It’s none of your business.” Like hell it isn’t.

“I beg to differ,” I sneer, folding my arms over my chest. I give him a look that surprisingly has him opening up to me.

“Her father can be very intimidating,” he admits with a sigh. “I’m not sure if he’s keen on me dating his daughter. I get the impression he doesn’t like me much.”

“I can see why,” I reply, giving him a look that says I don’t particularly like you either. Because I don’t. Not another word is spoken while we have a kind of standoff staring competition. My eyes are fucking burning, but there’s no way in hell I’m blinking. I’m not backing down. Immature I know, but there’s no way I’m letting this prick win.

“Carter,” Indi snaps from behind me. “What in the hell do you think you’re doing?”

“Trying to teach this moron some manners,” I answer turning to face her. Thank fuck she showed up. I don’t know how much longer I could’ve lasted. I blink a few times to try and moisten my dried up eyeballs.

Sweet Jesus.
I inhale a sharp breath as my eyes take her in. She looks gorgeous in that sexy-as-hell red dress.

She still takes my breath away after all this time. I hear her dick
boyfriend
open his car door from behind me. “Get back in the car,” I say through gritted teeth without even looking his way. I can’t, because my eyes are glued to her. When I hear his door close, I smirk to myself. Just what I thought—coward. She deserves so much better.
So much fucking better.
My smile widens when I hear her growl at me with disdain. She’s so fucking adorable when she’s pissed off.

“Look, Indi,” the
wanker
says from within the car. “How about we give tonight a miss?”

“What? No.” She frowns, pursing her lips at me before turning her attention back to him. “I’ve just spent the last hour getting ready, Mark.” I can tell.
She looks stunning.
I have to stop myself from licking my lips as I drink her in. What I wouldn’t give for a taste of grown up Indi.

Before he gets a chance to reply, I turn my head and glare at him. Silently warning him not to change his mind. His eyes dart from me to her as he swallows nervously.

“Carter,” she snaps. “How could you?” She places her palms on my chest and pushes me. I have to hold back my smile. She’s so damn cute. “You’re only back a day and you’re already trying to make my life miserable,” she sneers, pushing me again. Christ I’ve missed her smart mouth.

“You’re glad to have me back,” I say smugly. She falters for a second before answering, making me think whatever she’s going to say is the opposite of how she really feels.

“No, I’m not.” Bingo. She’s fucking glad. I knew it.

“Don’t tell me you haven’t missed me,” I say so only she can hear as I take a step closer. I’m so close now her perky little tits are almost brushing against my chest. Her scent envelopes me, making my dick come to life. I could drown in her smell, in her. I’m tempted to move in even closer, but I don’t. Even after all this time I remember exactly what her soft, warm body feels like pressed against mine. When her eyes widen and I hear her breath hitch, I know damn well I’m right. She’s missed me just as much as I’ve missed her.

I saw how content she was in my arms earlier today. If this
wanker
holds her heart, there’s no way she would’ve been so comfortable letting me hold her. For some reason it gives me hope. Maybe all is not lost.

Her hands come up giving me another shove. She’s pretty strong for a squirt. “Didn’t you learn your lesson the other day?” she scoffs, cocking one of her eyebrows. Shit. I take a step back as my hands instinctively cover my crotch. My fucking boys are still paying for my little prank with the sponge. I’m pretty sure they couldn’t survive another blow like that.

The determined look on her face has me retreating another step. I hold up one of my hands in defeat, while my other hand protects my nuts. If I had a white flag I’d be waving that fucker with a vengeance right now. What is it with her? When did she become a ball-busting warrior? I wonder if pretty boy has ever been introduced to her knee. Scratch that. I just witnessed him in action. He doesn’t have any balls.

“Okay. I get the message loud and clear. Please don’t go all ninja on my nuts again,” I plead. Her face relaxes slightly and I see a small smile play on those luscious lips of hers.

“Good. Now stay the hell away from me,” she says as she walks around me and gets into the
car. My heart sinks as the car reverses out of the driveway. That prick gives me a smug look and I have to hold myself back. Indiana’s eyes lock with mine briefly before she turns her head and looks out the passenger side window. Fuck. My damn heart hurts.

Stupid fucker
.

Once the car is out of sight, I head back into the house. I need a fucking drink. Opening the fridge I grab a beer before shoving it back on the shelf. I’m not drinking anything that belonged to Fuckwit. Besides, the mood I’m in calls for something stronger. Heading back into my room, I grab my car keys.
Time to get shitfaced.

••••

A few hours later, I’m halfway through my bottle of Jack when I hear a car pull up next door. I’m not sure if it’s Indi and her
boyfriend
, or Ross. I drag my drunken arse off the bed and head to the window to look. It’s Indiana.

I’ll admit I’m pleased that she isn’t spending the night with him, but I feel a pang in my heart when I see her lean over the centre console and lock lips with him. I remember all too well what a spectacular kisser she is. When his hand comes up and threads into her hair, pulling her in closer, I have to look away.

I’m not sure if it’s the alcohol running through my veins or not, but I want to jump out of this window and drag that cocksucker out of the car and away from her. I’m blaming the alcohol. Coming back here was a mistake. I think I was better off not knowing what she’s been up to.

Flopping back down on my bed, I reach for my bottle of Jack and take a swig. It burns like a motherfucker on its way down, but I welcome it. I need to be numb, so I take another gulp. I’ve only ever drunk straight from the bottle once before, and that was a few days after I left here all those years ago.

I see her bedroom light come on from where I sit. Everything in me wants to go over there, but what good would that do? She’s moved on. I suppose I can’t really blame her. In all honesty, I had no intentions of coming back. Even though I did entertain the thought a million times over the years. 

I watch as she heads towards her drawers and retrieves what I presume is a pair of pyjamas. Her gaze moves towards my window as she stares into the darkness of my bedroom. I’m tempted to switch on my bedside lamp so she can see me, but I don’t.

She turns suddenly and heads back out of her room. A few seconds later I see the bathroom light come on. She’s probably going to have a shower. That thought makes my dick twitch. It pisses me off. I push the thoughts of her naked and rubbing soap all over her delicious body out of my mind. I’m only torturing myself if I don’t.

CHAPTER FOUR

Indiana

My thoughts stray to Carter again as I let the hot water wash over my body. I was supposed to be spending the night at Mark’s, but after dinner I asked him to bring me home instead. I feel bad that I let Carter get in the way of our plans tonight, but my head is pounding.

Fuck him and his bullying tactics. Who in the hell does he think he is? Poor Mark was so intimidated by him. They’re worlds apart when it comes to personalities. Mark is so timid, Carter not so much.

After drying myself and dressing in my PJ’s, I grab a few headache pills out of the medicine cabinet and pop them in my mouth. I need to lie down.

Walking back into my bedroom, my traitorous eyes land on Carter’s bedroom window again. His lights are out so he must be asleep. I feel bad for the way I left things between us earlier, but he can’t butt into my life like that. He’s the one who walked away, not me.

“I’m not in my room,” I hear a male voice slur, almost making me jump out of my skin.

“What the fuck, Carter?” I screech when I see him sprawled out on my bed. “Get the fuck out of my room.”

“Can’t do that, sweetheart,” he says clumsily sitting up. Is he drunk? I take the few steps towards my bed and reach for his arm, tugging on it.

“You can’t be in here,” I growl. He looks up at me, and smiles. One of those panty-melting smiles that he used to give me all those years ago. I hate that he still makes me feel things after all this time. “You need to go.”

“Nope. I need to talk to you first,” he says, reaching out and pulling me forward with so much force I land on top of him. Being pressed against his hard body, on my bed, is not a good idea. “I’ve missed you,” he slurs wrapping me tightly in his arms. I can smell the alcohol on him.
It’s so strong, if I stay near him like this, I’m sure the fumes will make me tipsy.
I try and push myself up off his chest as he tightens his grip. I’ve missed him too, but that’s irrelevant. I decide not to voice that out loud.

Being this close to him is too much. I shouldn’t be feeling what I’m feeling. It’s wrong. My mind is flooded with memories of our time together. I can’t go there again. “Carter. Let me up.”

“Nope. Not until you talk to me.” He buries his face in my hair and inhales. “Fuck you smell good. Just like I remember.”

“Stop,” I say annoyed as I pull my face back, looking down at him. The sweet look on his face almost makes me smile. Almost. He shouldn’t be here. I’ve moved on. Being so close to him again only confuses me. He can’t just expect things are going to pick up from where they left off.

“I’m not letting you go until you agree to talk to me.”

“Fine,” I say sighing. “I’ll talk to you, but you need to let me go first.”

“Okay,” he says, releasing me. I immediately stand. If we’re going to talk, I need distance. A lot of distance. I take a few steps back from the bed. “Why are you here?”

“I told you, I miss you,” he replies, sitting up again.

“I have a boyfriend, Carter. Remember? You can’t just waltz back into my life five years later, after no goodbye, no contact, and expect to carry on as if nothing happened. You broke my heart when you left.” I feel tears sting my eyes, but thankfully I manage to keep them down. I refuse to let him see my weakness.

“I’m sorry,” he apologises, exhaling. “I thought leaving you behind was for the best …” His eyes meet mine and the sadness I see tears at my heart. “I fucked up. I know that.”

“Yes, you did. I understand why you felt you had to go, but you could’ve contacted me. Anything would’ve been better than nothing.” I wrap my arms around myself, trying hard to hold my emotions at bay.

“Do you love him, Indi?” I turn my face away from his. I can’t look at him and say this.

“Yes.” Although he doesn’t evoke the kind of feelings Carter did in the past, I care for Mark. A lot. He’s sweet. He treats me like a princess. He’d never leave me the way Carter did. With him I have a future. With Carter, all I have are memories. That’s all I’ll ever have. He doesn’t speak for the longest time. When my gaze moves back to him, I find his head bowed and his shoulders slumped. I feel like a bitch. “I’m sorry, Carter.”

“Don’t be,” he says, his sad eyes meeting mine. “I let you go, and now I have to live with it.”

“Carter,” I whisper, walking towards the bed and sitting beside him. “I’ll always treasure the time we spent together as kids. Always. But, that was in the past. We’re not kids anymore.”

“I guess,” he replies. “Although, you were the kid back then, remember? Not me.”

“Whatever,” I say bumping my shoulder with his. I see the corners of his lips turn up. I knew that would have to come up eventually. Some things will never change. “Surely you have someone special back home?” He’s gorgeous. I don’t doubt that the girls fall all over him, just like they used to when he lived here. I’m not sure I want to hear his answer, but I’m in a relationship. It would be selfish of me not to want the same for him.

“No. You know me, I was never one for commitment.” Don’t I know it? It saddens me that he still hasn’t changed after all this time. He’s a good guy deep down. He deserves someone special in his life.

“That’s sad, Carter.”

“That’s my life, I guess,” he says with a shrug. My hand comes up and rubs his back. I’m not sure how much of this is the alcohol talking.

“Tell me about your life. What have you been up to? Where are you living?” It’s something I’ve always wondered, but I also want to change the subject. This conversation is too depressing.

“I live up north, in Newcastle.”

“Really? It’s beautiful up there,” I say. Meg and I went up there for a weekend away a few years back. I can’t believe I was so close to him.

“It is. I have my own business. I’m a tattoo artist.”

“Wow. I’m glad you put your talent to use. You were always so good with your hands.”

“You better believe it, sweetheart,” he says wiggling his eyebrows, making me laugh.

“You’re still full of yourself I see.”

“Don’t tell me you don’t miss my hands on you? I bet lover boy doesn’t make you feel the way I used to.”

“I’m not going there with you, just drop it,” I snap, standing. His words sting because they’re true.

“Because I’m right,” he replies in a cocky tone. He is, but I’d never admit it.
Never.
My sex life with Mark is pretty bland. It’s rarely spontaneous, and always in a bed. He’s not as adventurous as Carter, but he still satisfies me, so that’s the main thing. Sometimes I wish for more, but great sex isn’t everything, I suppose.

“Can we change the subject, please?” I’m happy to talk about our current lives, but not sex. Mark wouldn’t approve of that, and I’d have to agree. It’s totally inappropriate. Especially given our past.