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Authors: Anah Crow

BOOK: becoming us
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“But...” She craned her neck to look up at him. Even with her hair a wreck and her makeup smeared from more than an hour of rolling around in bed, she was lovely. Bryce had always thought she was prettier when she was being herself.

“I just worry that you’re doing something because it’s what you should. Not because it’s who you are.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he knew he might as well have been talking to the mirror.

“So, I shouldn’t?” Rachel looked so damn trusting. Why the hell did people have to trust him?

Bryce shifted so that he could lie on his side, propped up on one elbow, and he tugged the sheet up so that his bare ass wouldn’t be the first thing someone saw if they barged in. It didn’t feel like he could give good advice flopped out where she’d left him when she was done with him.

Now he could think.

“I think you should do what’s right for you,” he said, trying to find the right words. “Not make choices because you’re scared of what will happen if you step off the path. You always were kind of charging off for a picket fence and minivan, then running away from it the next minute.

Matt’s a picket fence and minivan kind of guy, Rach. I just don’t know if that’s you.”

“Maybe.” Rachel bit her lip and frowned up at him. “But I want...” She waved one hand around vaguely. “Someone. You know.”

“Yeah, I know.” Bryce kissed her on the forehead. “But I think you should be looking for
you.

Becoming Us - 34

That got him a surprised look. Rachel sighed, tugging his shirt down and smoothing it out over her belly, poking at her hipbones through it “Okay, it is just weird for two of my ex-boyfriends to be saying the same thing.”

“Maybe two dumb guys can get it right?” Bryce gave her a hopeful smile.

When Rachel looked up at him, she patted his face. “Maybe. Are you really okay, babycakes?”

“I’m good enough. Right?” Bryce waggled his eyebrows at her and she giggled.

“Hmm.” Rachel’s eyes narrowed and she crooked a finger at him. “I wasn’t paying attention last time.”

“Oh, thanks.” Bryce tickled her for revenge, but he didn’t turn her down. It wasn’t like he had anything else to do this evening, and he liked making Rachel happy. It didn’t hurt that it was reassurance that he was still himself.

***

Much to Zac’s surprise, Bryce wasn’t avoiding him. If anything, Bryce was spending more time with Zac. Sure, he was going out and being Bryce and doing Bryce things, probably involving various girls, but Zac wasn’t thinking about that.

Bryce had actually shown up to hang out in Zac's room and study more than once. And he'd been totally cool with Zac practically sitting on him when they had friends over for a movie night.

Bryce seemed okay. Quieter, but okay. Zac was so damn happy. Things were almost normal, and that was the last thing Zac had expected after the way they’d started the year.

Zac was okay, too. It just wasn’t easy, keeping his hands off Bryce. Bryce was his friend, just like Perry was, but it was different. With Perry, it wasn’t serious, and it had never been anything more than really good sex. With Bryce, Zac had to be careful. So careful. He didn’t want to hurt Bryce, didn’t want to make anything harder for Bryce. But, damn it, Bryce was hot
and
his best friend. Zac wished he could read minds. He wanted so much for what made sense to him to make sense to Bryce, too.

Instead, Zac kept his hands to himself. Not entirely to himself. He went out to a few parties and hooked up with girls. He was waiting for Bryce to make the next move, though, so he turned down the guys who came onto him, the one who had read the article in
Game On
and a couple who just put the moves on. It wasn’t like Zac thought that one night meant anything, but he didn’t want to take the chance that Bryce would catch him with some other guy and get the wrong idea. The next move never came, though, and Zac kept trying to keep busy.

After a party that devolved into a fistfight between the soccer team and the baseball team, Zac gave up on having fun. He went home, but his room was empty. Right. That was why he’d gone out. He didn’t want to be in an empty room, so he went to Bryce’s room, instead. He remembered to knock, though. Maybe Bryce wasn’t alone, just like Zac didn’t want to be alone.

Becoming Us - 35

There was a shuffle and then the door opened. Bryce, wearing nothing but his boxers, was there, yawning and bleary and absolutely gorgeous. “Dude.” He blinked and focused in the light from the bathroom down the hall. “‘Sup?” He stepped back to let Zac in. His room was the same as always, except for a slumping pile of books by the bed and a basket of clean laundry. No girl. No one at all.

Zac was just drunk enough that his rule about keeping his hands off Bryce didn’t seem to apply right now. He slipped inside and let the door close behind him, then locked it. “Sorry I woke you,” he said, even as he was reaching for Bryce. God, Bryce looked good. “C’mere. I wanna...” He leaned up on his toes and angled his mouth against Bryce’s.

Bryce startled a little, but he didn’t draw back or freak out or anything awful, which was a bonus.

“What’s wrong, man?” he asked, when he pulled away, still looking like he wasn’t completely awake. He was all concern, though; that was Bryce, wanting to make things okay for people.

Zac shook his head. Nothing was wrong. “Just a shitty party,” he muttered. “Nothing. I just...

God, you’re hot.”

“I...” Bryce looked baffled and he shook his head to stop whatever he’d been about to say.

“Never mind. C’mere.” He drew Zac over to the bed. “You’ve been a fucking party animal lately. You must be beat. Come on, you can sleep with me.” Zac deflated, sighing, and let Bryce lead him to the bed. He didn’t want to sleep, though. He wanted Bryce. He’d wanted Bryce for longer than just since they'd kissed and so much more after that, and he’d kept his hands to himself.

“Bryce...”

Bryce stopped and turned to see Zac’s face. “What’s wrong?” His computer screen was on a dark screensaver with little fireworks, but there was enough light to see by, and Zac could see the worry on his face. He looked so good -- eyes dark and soft, cheeks warm from sleeping, and his lips full and kissable.

“I don’t want to sleep, Bryce.” Zac hadn’t gotten this far with Bryce by lying to him. “I want
you
.”

“Oh.” Bryce swallowed hard as that sank in, and then he nodded. His cheeks went deep red, a contrast Zac could see even in the low light. “It’s not that I don’t want... I don’t know, Zac...” He could look really innocent sometimes.

“You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to,” Zac said, feeling guilty about the worried look on Bryce’s face. “I just... I wanted to kiss you again.” He wanted more than that, too, but if a kiss was all Bryce was ready for, it would be enough. Last time had started with kisses, too.

Zac stepped in again, hands against Bryce’s warm, bare skin, and stood up on his toes to get what he wanted.

Becoming Us - 36

“Oh.” Bryce looked uncertain, but then he kissed Zac sweetly, gathering Zac up against his bare chest. The kiss didn’t stay sweet. Maybe Bryce just needed to change gears and had a kind of sticky clutch when it came to this stuff; Zac could deal. It wasn’t more than a few heartbeats before Bryce was kissing him hot and hungry, the way he had the first time.

Bryce was a really good kisser. Zac couldn’t help the little wanting noises he made, or the way his hands slid over Bryce’s bare chest and back. It felt so good to get his hands on someone he wanted like he wanted Bryce. He kissed Bryce back hard, letting Bryce feel how much Zac wanted him.

Bryce got his hands up under Zac’s shirt and moaned. He pulled Zac close, losing his inhibitions and waking up a little at the same time; he was already getting hard. There wasn’t any question that he wanted Zac, too. No need to feel guilty.

“Like that, yeah,” Zac murmured, before going back for another kiss. Bryce’s hands slid further up until Zac’s shirt was bunched up around his chest. Zac was trying to get closer, pressing his bared skin to Bryce’s, when Bryce pulled away from kissing him.

“What, are you...” Zac tried to pull himself together to work out what was wrong, fumbling through the haze of alcohol to remember what, if anything, had upset Bryce last time. Before he could get his thoughts together, his shirt was being peeled off over his head and his body was helping Bryce get it off with automatic motions. “Oh, good idea.” He’d much rather be out of his clothes. And, God, Bryce was only in those thin boxers and... as soon as the shirt was gone, Bryce was kissing him again.

All Zac wanted was to feel good, to feel more than good, to feel it with Bryce like before. Last time, sticky pants; he remembered that. Pants gone would fix that. He worked his hands between them and reminded himself not to tug down Bryce’s boxers, to concentrate on his own pants instead. Oh, God, he loved how Bryce kissed and the feel of Bryce’s big arms around him. Zac could hardly think, but he got his jeans and boxers down around his knees at last. Now, he had to push away from Bryce’s warm body to strip the rest of the way.

“Zac?” Bryce sounded so sweetly baffled, but he let Zac go. “What’s wrong?” Zac managed to focus on Bryce; the only thing wrong with this scene was the thin cotton keeping him from seeing Bryce naked.

“You, too,” Zac said, as he fought his way out of the maze of his jeans and boxers and socks. It was a good idea. Best idea ever. Bryce needed to be naked so that Zac could look at him and so that they didn’t end up coming in their pants again.

Bryce slid his thumbs under the waistband of his boxers and stripped them off, standing in front of Zac bare and hard, his skin lit by the glow of the computer screen. “Better now?”
Becoming Us - 37

Oh, yeah
. Yeah, that was good. Zac almost fell over as he stepped out of his clothes; he was more interested in sliding his hands over Bryce’s hips, thumbs trailing in to brush the tight, dark curls at the base of Bryce’s dick. Bryce had a really nice dick. Getting a look at it hard was all Zac needed to confirm what he’d felt when they’d rubbed off on each other. Zac wasn’t a size queen, but he really did like something substantial and, God, Bryce was substantial and then some.

Bryce leaned in to place a kiss that was half bite on the curve of Zac’s neck, both hands on Zac’s shoulders to keep him close. The touches were making him shiver and he was pushing his hips into Zac’s hands.
So fucking hot
.

“Yeah,” Zac murmured again. “God, Bryce...” He curled his hands over Bryce’s ass, pulling Bryce closer, so their dicks slid against each other.

Bryce whimpered a little at that, but he got one hand on Zac’s hip and one at his nape, tilting Zac’s head so he could kiss and lick and bite Zac’s neck. He was surprisingly easy, and he obviously wanted Zac, far more than his behavior lately would have suggested. Zac couldn't make sense of that, didn't want to.

“Zac,” Bryce whispered. “Just... God, Zac. Just tell me...”

“Bed.” Bed would make it easier to touch, and Zac really wanted to touch. “I want... God, Bryce, you feel so good. I just want to touch you.”

“Yeah, okay.” Bryce crawled backward into bed, sprawling out, and reached for Zac. “Come touch me. I wanna feel it.”

Zac just looked at Bryce for a moment. Bryce was tall and broad, powerfully built, and his dark curls and tanned skin made him look so hot. Zac crawled up onto the bed beside Bryce and cupped his cheek to kiss him again.

Bryce kissed him back hard, running his hands over Zac’s chest. “Why?” he whispered when he pulled back. “I mean, why tonight?” He didn’t stop touching, brushing Zac’s nipples with his fingertips. “Are you okay?”

Why tonight? Why not every other night?
Zac ran his hand from Bryce’s shoulder to his hip and said, honestly, “I’ve been wanting to since last time. I just... I didn’t want to push.”

“Oh.” The touch made Bryce shiver and his eyes were wide with surprise. “I...” He leaned up to kiss Zac tenderly. “I was just worried you were upset about something.”

“No. I just... Blowing off steam, you know?” Zac’s fingers traced delicate patterns over Bryce’s hip. “The party I went to tonight was shit, though. Those fuckers on the baseball team started something with the soccer goalie -- you know Jeff, right? And so the whole soccer team ended up in some kind of crazy fistfight with the baseball team, and I kinda gave up, and came back here.”

Becoming Us - 38

“Okay.” Bryce’s arousal hadn’t faded a bit while they were talking, even though his attention was on Zac’s words. He could be really sweet when he wanted to be. “As long as no one pissed you off or anything. I’d hate to have to go hit someone.” Zac laughed; he liked that Bryce wanted to take care of him. “Nah, man, they all know my boyfriend’d come beat ‘em up for me,” he teased, moving to kneel over Bryce’s legs. He slid his hands up Bryce’s thighs, feeling the smooth skin and muscles under his palms. God, Bryce looked so good. Zac was giddy with getting what he wanted.

“I would, too.” There was a sudden flare of heat in Bryce’s eyes, something protective and angry, and a ripple of tension went through him. He pushed himself up on one arm, cupping Zac’s cheek in the other hand and kissing Zac fiercely.

Oh
. Zac opened up to the kiss. Bryce was so easy-going, it was easy to forget that he could get riled up. Zac was always startled by Bryce’s protective streak, even if it was pretty consistent.

Knowing that Bryce would get in a fight over him was...
such a fucking turn-on
.

The thought left Zac moaning, leaning down over Bryce to kiss him back down onto the bed.

Bryce’s inhibitions were completely gone now; he was so sexy and easy when he was sleepy, just like before. His hands were all over Zac, touching, groping, and stroking. He was kissing Zac back with unfettered heat, hungry and needy, arching up to get as much contact as he could, like he’d forgotten to be afraid.

“God, Bryce...” Zac rode Bryce down onto the bed, licking back into his mouth, fucking Bryce’s mouth with his tongue. Bryce had such big hands, and they felt so good on Zac’s skin. He arched into every touch and touched Bryce in turn.

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