Before I Let You Go (15 page)

K
elly opened her eyes and allowed herself time to adjust to gray light coming in through the windows. Rain was still beating down heavily outside and she released a sigh. She was in the country vacationing and didn’t have anywhere to go this morning, so there was no rush to get up. With another sigh, she shut her eyes again and snuggled into the covers.

She’d started to drift off to sleep once more when she suddenly bolted upright.
Diamere
. Her heart began to thump in her chest. He was somewhere in the cottage. Tossing the covers aside, she rose from the bed and slipped her feet into her pale blue slippers. As she moved down the hall, she tightened the belt on her robe. When she reached the kitchen she stopped in her tracks.

“Good morning, beautiful.” Diamere greeted her with a warm smile, then reached for a spatula and flipped a golden-brown pancake.

“Hi,” she replied in a voice filled with uncertainty. She was in awe at the kind man before her. The smells of fresh coffee and bacon mingled in the air.

After a moment of silence, he glanced over at her and asked, “How’d you sleep?”

“Fine,” she replied as she crossed the room and took a seat at the table.

“Good. I thought about waking you but I figured after what you went through you needed your rest.”

Her eyes traveled to the apple-shaped clock on the wall and she gasped. “It’s almost ten o’clock.”

He nodded. “I know. I checked in on you at eight just to make sure you were still breathing,” he replied with a hint of amusement.

He met her eyes and stared at her for a long moment before she turned away and self-consciously combed her fingers through her hair. Why was he here? she wondered. Diamere still hadn’t told her. Not that she had given him a chance.

“Ready for some coffee?” he asked, breaking into her thoughts. Kelly nodded, then watched him reach for a mug and fill it. She couldn’t help admiring how good he looked in his low-rise denim jeans and a simple black T-shirt that strained across his massive biceps. His feet were bare and she realized how comfortable and at home he looked.

Kelly gazed out the window. Rain was still beating steadily against the glass. It was a summer storm like none she had ever seen. For the moment it seemed as if they were stranded out here at the lake. Thank goodness school didn’t start for another week. Mama Tate was a smart woman, and with the grocery store
being so far away, she always kept the cottage freezer stocked with food.

“Is the power out?”

Diamere nodded. “Yep. Thank goodness you have a generator, so we at least have lights, but the phones don’t work. I think that big tree cut the power line.” He turned to her and the corner of his mouth twitched upward. “So in other words, we’re stranded.”

Realization sank in. The two of them were alone together until the storm was over. Kelly’s heart pounded heavily at the prospect of being alone with him for any amount of time.

Diamere carried over her coffee along with a plate, and placed them on the table in front of her. Kelly looked down at the food, then back up at him. “Aren’t you going to eat, too?”

He filled his mug, then headed to the table and took a seat. “I’ve already eaten.”

Kelly shrugged, then reluctantly reached for a knife and fork and cut into the fluffy stack.

“It’s beautiful out here. I can see why you like to come,” he murmured.

She nodded and finished chewing. “I’ve loved this place all my life.”

Diamere looked out the window. Silence hung in the room for several minutes.

“Why are you here?” she finally asked.

He avoided making eye contact, reaching over to her plate and stealing a slice of bacon. “I’ll tell you later. Right now I want to know why you were out in that water.”

His question was simple enough. She shrugged. “I already told you. I felt like swimming.”

“Didn’t you know a storm was on the way?”

Kelly took a sip of coffee as she thought about his question. “Yes, but I wasn’t expecting it to happen until much later. When I noticed the sky had gotten dark I tried to get back, but it was too late.”

“Why were you swimming so late in the evening?”

“You sure ask a lot of questions,” she said wryly.

“I’m just trying to understand.”

She narrowed her gaze. “Why? So you can tell Mark on me?”

“Yeah, as a matter of fact. Maybe he’ll talk some sense into you so you won’t do something so stupid again. You could have drowned.”

“Stupid?” she repeated. Diamere sure had a lot of nerve. “Stupid as you coming all the way down here? Now I’m stuck with you until the storm clears!”

Diamere took a sip from his mug, then rose. “Actually, coming here was the smartest decision I’ve ever made.” He leaned in and pressed his lips to hers, catching Kelly completely off guard. “Now that I know you’re okay, I’m going to grab my bag out of the car and take a shower.” He walked off, whistling a tune.

The wonderful breakfast was stuck in Kelly’s throat. As long as he kissed her like that, she was far from okay. Hearing the front door shut, she stepped to the window and watched him go out to his SUV and retrieve a black duffel bag. He had come here with the intention of staying.

A warm feeling flooded her body. What was he up to?

She continued to think about it as she finished her breakfast and started on the dishes. From down the hall she could hear the sound of running water, and couldn’t
help thinking about Diamere standing under the warm spray of the shower in all his naked glory.

The last time she’d seen him was after they had made love, after leaving Hadley. She had made it clear, or at least she thought she had, that she was not at all interested in continuing their relationship. Kelly’s blood began to boil. She hoped he hadn’t come out here to persuade her to do otherwise. Diamere was stubborn; she knew that for a fact. But if he thought he was going to get his way this time, he was in for a rude awakening.

Lightning flashed outside the window again and the rumble of thunder made her shudder. Hearing the shower water turn off, she decided to go confront Diamere. But he wasn’t in the bathroom. After searching all three bedrooms, to no avail, she moved down the oak wood hallway to the spacious family room at the back of the house, where she found him searching the built-in wall unit.

“What are you doing?” she asked, standing in the doorway with her hands on her hips.

Diamere swung around and she looked down at the board game in his hands. “Care for a round of Scrabble?”

“Scrabble?” she asked, brow lowered in confusion. “No, I don’t want to play. What I want is to know why you’re here.”

“I’ll tell you what. You beat me at a game of Scrabble, and I’ll tell you whatever you want.” Kelly didn’t miss the glint of a challenge sparkling in Diamere’s eyes.

A smiled curled her lips. If there was one thing she was good at, it was Scrabble. She would have her questions answered in no time.

An hour later, Kelly was frustrated—sexually frustrated.

“Kelly, is something wrong?” Diamere asked as he watched her mop her forehead for what he figured was probably the seventh or eighth time.

“No, I’m fine. Just hurry up.”

He placed his letters on the board, and when she looked down, she did exactly what he had spelled: m-o-a-n.

Kelly was frustrated, all right. Every word Diamere spelled had some romantic meaning.
Sex. Lips. Kiss. Wet.
And now
moan
. What in the world was he up to?

“It’s your turn.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know,” she snapped, feeling increasingly irritated by the second. She didn’t have much to choose from.

“Are you going to finish playing or what?” he taunted.

“Just give me a minute,” she growled. The game was supposed to have been a simple slam dunk. Instead, he was beating her badly. She still had five letters left, while he only had one. Nibbling her lower lip, she studied the board, and then a smile curled her lips. She reached for three letters and added them to a letter
Y
, to spell out
play
.

“Play, huh?”

“Yeah, like we’re playing a game of Scrabble because someone is trying to play games instead of telling me why he’s here.” She rolled her eyes and reached for a bottle of water.

Diamere’s face creased with laughter. “No games. I told you I’d tell you if you win.” A smirk took over his
expression. “Unfortunately, though, I got this game in the bag.”

With a look of amusement, he picked up the last tile chip from his tray and set it on the board, spelling
sexy
. “Sweetheart, that’s what you are to me. Sexy.”

His words caused the churning in her stomach to intensify. Every time his gaze met hers, her heart turned over in response. Kelly caught herself moistening her lips as he leaned in close enough to kiss her. Instead of doing so, he whispered in her ear, “Looks like I get to keep my secret a little longer.”

She pulled back with a furious gasp. He was getting a big kick out of teasing her.

“How about double or nothing?” he challenged.

With a frown, she rose from her chair. “How about I’m tired and I’m going to go read my book. The thing I had planned to do before you interrupted my vacation.”

He rose, as well. “While you’re reading, I’m going to work on that leaky sink in the kitchen.” He packed up the game and returned it to the shelf.

Kelly shook her head in disbelief. “You really aren’t going to tell me, are you?”

“I will. Just not yet.” He cupped her chin and pressed his lips to hers, then headed toward the kitchen.

Kelly was livid. How dare he think he could drive down to the lake and seduce her into continuing his no-frills relationship? Well, he had another thing coming. The only thing stopping her from throwing him out was the storm raging around them. Furiously, she stalked down the hall to her room and flopped onto the bed.

Refusing to waste another second thinking about him, she reached for the book on the nightstand and opened to the page she had bookmarked. Within minutes she was
into the story, and found herself wrapped up in the love affair between the two main characters. Kelly couldn’t help but wonder why love was so perfect in books, and was thinking of every reason why it wasn’t possible to be that way in real life when she felt her eyelids grow heavy. With a yawn, she curled up into the pillows and drifted off to sleep.

Diamere found what he was looking for, then closed the door to the shed out back and headed into the house. Replacing the worn washer was an easy enough job, and gave him the excuse he had needed to put some distance between himself and Kelly.

A smile curled his lips as he thought about the expression on her lovely face as he’d teased her. He felt that she had been seconds away from asking him to leave, which was why he’d decided to get out of her way. Not that it would have mattered. With the rain coming down the way it was, he was certain the bridge at the end of the road was washed out.

He reached for a wrench and within minutes had the leak stopped and the faucet back in working order. There was no noise coming from down the hall, and Diamere was beginning to wonder if maybe he had pushed her too far. He loved Kelly and had every intention of telling her just that, but he was going to do it on his own time. He was still getting used to the idea, and part of him, his pride, wanted to know if she felt the same way about him.
What if she didn’t?
The possibility kept running through his head, especially while they were playing Scrabble, and she’d grown angry and mentioned she wasn’t too happy about him
ruining her vacation. The sooner he told her how he felt, the better for both of them, because he wasn’t sure how much more either of them could take.

K
elly yawned and glanced out the window. The rain was still coming down, but had slowed up a bit. Hearing movement coming from the front of the house, she rolled her eyes toward the ceiling. They were stuck here together. There was nothing either of them could do about it until the storm had passed. Reluctantly, she rose from bed and headed down the hall to the bathroom. She was tempted to hide out in her room until morning. The way things looked outside, she was almost certain the storm would be over by then and the roads would be manageable.

After brushing her teeth and running a comb through her hair, Kelly moved down the hall and into the kitchen. Entering the room, she found Diamere looking inside the refrigerator. He lifted his head and greeted her with a smile.

“I was planning to grill the salmon you had in the
refrigerator, unless you would rather have something else.”

She shook her head. “No, salmon sounds good. But it’s raining outside.”

He shrugged. “I’ll pull the grill under the awning. It won’t take that long to fix fish.”

“You’re the boss. Do you need some help?”

“How about you make a salad?”

“I’m on it.”

While she washed the lettuce and chopped vegetables, he went outside and fired up the barbecue. From the kitchen window she watched him. He had taken off his shirt and was wearing a plain white T-shirt that showed off his muscular arms and the tight muscles of his stomach.
Stop looking at him
. All she was doing was making matters worse.

As soon as she finished preparing an attractive-looking salad, she grabbed a bottle of wine from the top shelf of the refrigerator and carried both out onto the sunporch. By the time she got the cork out, Diamere was coming through the door with the grilled salmon.

“Perfect timing,” she said as she stared down at the main course.

“I told you it would take no time.” He set the plate down on the table next to the salad, then pulled his wet T-shirt over his head. Her gaze dropped to his chest and traveled over the dark mat of hair, now wet from the rain. “Let me go and wash up so we can eat,” he added.

Kelly watched him leave the room, admiring his walk and the way his blue jeans hugged his perfect butt.
Oh, boy
. The next several hours were not going to be easy.

The rain had slowed and the sky had turned an
orange-red. She managed to take a moment away from her racing thoughts to appreciate the beauty of their surroundings.

The two of them were relatively quiet as they ate. She was trying to patiently wait until Diamere decided to tell her the reason for his visit, and instead of getting angry again, she decided it was best just to act as if she didn’t care one way or the other.

“It looks like the rain is slowing,” he said, to break the silence.

Chewing her food, she nodded. “Yes, it is, finally.”

“Hopefully, tomorrow I’ll be able to return home.”

Why did she suddenly feel saddened at the thought of him leaving, especially since she had made it clear he had interrupted her vacation? “Yes, you probably will.”

There was a pregnant pause before he asked, “When are you returning home?”

She stared across the table at his beautiful chocolate eyes. “Not until Saturday. School starts on Monday, and I want to enjoy the weekend because I won’t get another time to relax like this until Christmas break.”

“Are you looking forward to the semester starting?” he asked between bites of salmon.

“I can’t wait.” She couldn’t help the excitement in her voice.

“What is it you like so much about teaching?”

Kelly met Diamere’s eyes and could tell he was actually interested in listening to her talk about her job.

“I like it when my students’ faces light up when they’ve learned something new. Nothing warms my heart more than that.” While they ate, she went on
to talk about the class of students she’d had the year before. Kelly loved the way Diamere listened and only interrupted when he had a question. Devin had never wanted to talk about the students after hours.

“I can tell you truly love your job. That’s important,” Diamere said when she finally finished.

She nodded. “I do. I really do.”

He took a sip of wine, then licked his lips. She found herself following the swipe of his tongue with her eyes.

“I know Nana asked you this, but do you really see yourself having kids of your own someday?” he asked at last.

She nodded. “Yes, I definitely want children. I think some women are meant to be mothers, and I’m sure I’m one of them.”

“I agree. I think you would make an excellent mother.”

“And you would make an excellent father.” Kelly wanted to mention Ryan’s daughters, but decided against it.

Diamere looked over at her, his eyes serious. “I didn’t think I would be any good at being a father, but when the twins were born I fell in love with them so fast there wasn’t anything I wouldn’t do for my angels. I…” His voice broke and he reached for his glass and took another drink.

Kelly’s stomach turned. It had been over a year, yet the pain was still there. She placed a comforting hand on his arm. “I know it’s still hard.”

He nodded. “It is. Someday I hope to have kids again.”

“I know you’ll be a fabulous father.”

Their eyes met and her heart flipped as she saw his sadness. “You think so?”

She nodded and couldn’t stop the tears that filled her eyes. “I know so.”

“Hearing that makes me so sure about what I’m going to do.”

Kelly licked her lips. “What is that?”

“Kiss you.” Diamere leaned forward slightly and took the flute from her hand, setting it back on the table. His other hand slid around her neck, gliding smoothly over her skin. Excitement stirred within her, and her lips parted as he drew closer and his lips brushed hers. Diamere rose from his chair, bringing Kelly with him without breaking the kiss. He wound an arm around her waist and pulled her tight against him.

“I want you. I couldn’t go another night without you,” he confessed. He crushed his mouth over hers, kissing her deeply.

Kelly accepted what he offered. She wrapped her arms around his neck and met his tongue stroke for stroke, her lips softening under his.

“Why are you here?” she asked again.

“For you. I came here to be with you.” He caressed her breast through the sundress and squeezed her nipple between his thumb and forefinger, arousing her. How in the world did she think she could live without this? Her body ached for his touch, and to her relief he moved his hand to her other breast.

“But why?” she asked, growing irritated by his lack of words, though simultaneously aroused by the exploration of his hands.

“I can show you better than I can tell you,” he groaned before his tongue again explored the recesses of her
mouth. “I can’t fight it any longer. You’re like a drug I’ve become addicted to.”

He drew her dress up her knee and slid his hand underneath, pushing her panties to the side and making room for his hand.

“Spread your legs.”

Eagerly, Kelly parted her thighs and moaned as his finger slid inside her wetness. “Diamere,” she cried out, her trembling limbs clinging to him.

“That’s right. Say my name,” he growled, thrusting another finger into her wet heat. Kelly shuddered, her entire body waiting for this moment. Her desire for him was too overwhelming to ignore. Any attempt to stop what was happening was a waste of time. She was lost in the feel of his fingers stroking her in the most intimate way. “You miss me touching you like this, don’t you?”

“Diamere!” she cried. It took everything she had not to collapse to her knees. He increased the pressure and spread her thighs wider. Kelly found herself rocking her hips to the rhythm of his fingers. It wasn’t long before her body clamped down hard against his penetration and she shuddered with pleasure. “Yes, yes,” she moaned as she rode the final wave. She waited until her breathing resumed before she looked up shyly, filled with confusion about what was happening between them. The smoldering flame she saw in his eyes startled her.

“You are so beautiful when you come apart in my arms.” With that he lowered his head and seared a path down the column of her neck, across her racing pulse beating heavily beneath her skin. He lifted her off her feet and carried her over to the table. “Lie back.”

Kelly complied, resting her weight on her elbows
and her feet on the table. Diamere slid her panties down past her knees, over her ankles and onto the floor, then pushed her thighs apart. He looked at her and she was sure he saw desire burning in her eyes just before he lowered his head. On contact, she practically jumped off the table. The feel of his tongue between her legs brought her to life. “Please…” She closed her eyes and moaned.

He increased the pressure and circled the bud with the smooth tip of his tongue in a way she had only dreamed of a man doing. Then he spread her wider and settled his mouth even deeper between her thighs. She let out a moan as he buried his tongue inside her and stroked her with long sweeps. His teasing touch had her arching into his mouth while she gripped the back of his head and pulled him closer. He nipped and suckled her as he dipped into her sweetness.

Kelly was burning with need. It was obvious this was another game to him. He wanted her begging for him. All she wanted was to feel him inside her body, with his hips pumping furiously to bring them both pleasure. She looked up to see him staring down at her as he loosened his pants, reached for a condom in his pocket and slid it on. Those few seconds felt like forever.

“Shift your hips toward me.”

She slid her trembling body off the table and Diamere wrapped her legs around his waist, preventing her from falling.

“I can’t wait to be inside of you.” He slipped his hand between her legs. “Damn, you’re wet.” He settled himself there and lifted her bottom in the palms of his hands.

Her eyes glazed over as he positioned himself and
slid inside. Kelly exhaled on contact and tightened her muscles possessively around him. He groaned and was soon trembling for control, obviously trying to take his time and make the moment last as long as possible.

“Diamere,” she breathed. She arched against him, her hands gripping his waist, then cupping his buttocks, urging him deeper still. “I want all of you, Diamere.”

His response was immediate. In one swift movement, he buried himself completely, grunting with the effort. Kelly cried out in pleasure and clamped down on him hard.

“I can’t seem to get enough of you. Nothing has ever felt this good,” he panted.

His words were like music to her ears. Still, she knew he was caught up in the euphoria of the moment, and his words would be meaningless later. She bit back the thought and focused on the pleasure he was bringing her.

Diamere turned her face to his. He brushed his mouth against her parted lips. “You’re mine, Kelly. Make no mistake,” he said as he pumped his hips, and she welcomed every thrust into her body with a fervor that shook her to her very soul.

“Tell me you’re mine.”

How could she ever forget how completely he fulfilled her? How complete she felt when they were together? “I’m yours.” Today, tomorrow, for as long as he wanted, she was his. Tears burned the backs of her eyes. Who was she trying to fool? There was no way she could have ended their affair. Not until it had run its course, and she parted with a broken heart. Diamere had become too important to her and she just wasn’t ready to let that go yet.

His heart pounded as she held him close, cradling his muscled body against her own. She wanted to keep him inside of her forever.

“You’re mine,” he said.

“Yes,” she answered. “Yes, I’m yours.”

“Kelly? Look at me.”

She opened her eyes and gazed at him, into dark eyes so tender and mesmerizing she was at a loss for words. His rhythm slowed between her thighs as he stared back at her.

“I want to tell you why I am here.”

Kelly felt the air surrounding them sizzle with awareness.

“Before I walk out of your life forever, before I let you go once and for all, I have to tell to you something.” She saw a muscle in his jaw tick as he fought for control.

“What’s that?” she asked, hanging on to every word as the tension in the room increased.

“I love you, Kelly.”

She blinked twice and gasped. Did she hear him right? “What did you say?”

Diamere pressed his mouth to hers in a slow, sensual dance, then pulled back and reaffirmed, “I said I love you.”

His words were music to her ears, but in the heat of the moment a man was likely to say anything. She read enough issues of
Essence
magazine to know that. However, right now she didn’t care.

She opened her legs wide and leaned forward, trailing her tongue across his neck and shoulder, and moaning at the taste of him. He rocked his hips, penetrating her deeper than she could ever have imagined. Her pleasure built steadily, sweeping her into a world of blissful
sensation. Nothing had ever felt so good and nothing else ever would. She had to enjoy every second of what he was giving her because it would be their last. She felt herself spinning beyond rational thought, caught up in the rapture of their bodies joined as one.

“We belong together,” he growled.

Her breath caught at his words. As his rhythm increased, her breath came out in a long, pleasured sigh. He was thick and hard and filled her completely.

“Kelly,” he groaned, thrusting furiously, “I can’t hold on…Kelly, I love you.”

And then she was on fire and he was pumping so hard he had her crying out in pleasure as her body surrendered to him. She gave in to the delicious heat that had her convulsing in his arms.

Diamere grunted and let out a violent roar of release, his body tensing and then collapsing.

Kelly woke with the sheets tangled around her legs. She pulled them up over her body and found the satin material was scented with the musk of sex. She inhaled deeply, loving the delicious reminder of making love all night. She grinned as she stretched her sore muscles. It was worth it. After they’d made love on the table, Diamere had carried her back to the bedroom for a sensational night of passion.